Joshua had called to let me know that his sister moved back with his mother and father, far away from the old husband. The guy hadn't even looked for her. Maybe she was finally safe. And that baby, Violet Rose, would never have to deal with her father.

I was on yet another plane less than a week later.

Lilly greeted me at the airport, "MIA!" she screamed.

My face exploded into a huge smile. I hadn't seen Lilly in...well, since at least last year. I ran up to her and gave her the biggest hug possible. "I've missed you!" I exclaimed.

She simply smiled, "Come on let me get you back home."

"Mia, I'll see you on Saturday?" Preston asked, coming up behind me.

"Oh, right. Lilly, this is my friend Preston. He's going out with my friend Aimee."

"Nice to meet ya," she said. She sure had gained some manners over the years.

"Likewise. So, Saturday?" he asked, backing away.

"Yup. Later."

I went to her apartment that night. She was living with that Tony guy. "You guys have been together for awhile," I commented, looking at the pictures on their walls.

"Yeah...two and a half years now. My parents wanted to kill me when I told them I'd be living here when I was home."

"Empty nest syndrome," I replied, staring at a picture of Lilly with Michael. "His hair is so long."

She laughed, "I know. Crazy huh? It's his pride and joy. I once told him I'd give him a thousand bucks to shave it all off. He told me that he'd only do that if say, the love of his life lost all her hair due to chemotherapy. He'd do it just to be supportive. Or if she wanted him to cut it. He's totally obbessed with finding her. But he still won't date. He tried to date some wacko European a few years back but..."

I laughed. Michael never seemed to be one about appearances back when I knew him. He didn't seem to care about how be looked. I always thought that was the best thing about him. He was exactly how you saw him, no hiding behind fancy clothes or hair. He never cared about how people looked at him. "Think he'll ever cut it?"

She shook her head. "Yeah right. He's fearing that he'll go bald like my mother's father. The baldness gene is carried by the mother."

I nodded. "So he and Tony are friends?"

"That's how we met. They are in the same band."

"Cool-"

The front door opened. "Hey Lill!" a voice called out.

"In the den!" she called back.

A tall guy with long brown hair came in and didn't acknowledge me. Or maybe he didn't see me because I was behind a fake potted tree they had. "The guys are coming over to crash, do you mind?"

Lilly looked at me quickly, "What guys?"

"You know what guys," he replied, looking at the TV guide. "Larry, Nolan, Reggie, Michael."

I froze when he said the name. I was not prepared to see Michael. Seeing his picture was traumatic enough. Hearing his voice on the phone was traumatic. I couldn't...I just couldn't handle actually being face to face with him.

I motioned to the door and waved good bye. I made it to the hallway before she came out to me. "It's unhealthy to avoid him," she said carefully. "You are going to have to see him someday. I mean, if I end up marrying Tony...you'll be my maid of honor and Michael would probably be the best man."

"By then I'll hopefully have Joshua with me," I said softly. "We could very well be married or engaged or something..."

"You'll never get married if you don't get over Michael," she predicted. "It's been four years. Almost five years now. Doesn't it mean something that you are still this nervous at the mere mention of his name?"

I avoided her gaze. "I dunno...but I love Joshua. Completely adore him."

"You have a heavier history with Michael though," she argued. "And you still love Michael, whether you believe it or not. I can see it in your face right now."

"Are you kidding me?"

"Why would I?"

"What history do I have with him? I slept with him, big stinking deal!"

Her jaw dropped in shock. Oops, she hadn't known that detail, huh? "Y-You what?"

I froze like a deer in headlights. "Nothing."

"Uh, no, you said," she said, looking behind me. She pulled me into the apartment. "You said you slept with him. My big brother? Am I to assume that this is in the non-platonic Dawson and Joey way? But instead as the he took your virginity way?"

A knock came to the door. "Lilly, could you get that?" Tony asked.

She opened the door a little, "Wait a few minutes, I'm naked," she hissed to the others on the other side of the door. "Go wait by the stairs."

"Lilly," Michael's voice said. "Lilly, come on. Let us in. I know you aren't naked. And who are you talking to like that?"

She bared her shoulder, "I am naked. And is it really your business?"

"It's just...It sounded a lot like-"

"Like who?" she snapped with a smirk.

"Like someone I know."

"Or used to know," she replied.

"What's that supposed to mean? Is it Mia?" he asked, poking part of his face in the door. Luckily she still had the chain on so he couldn't push his way in. He started singing a silly, drunken song. "If it's Mia then let me see her. I wanna kiss her and stuff." He was laughing drunkenly.

His nose. And those lips. I've kissed those both...

Lilly started laughing. for a second I seriously thought she was going to open the door and see what he would really do if he saw me."NOthing at all mon frere. Just give me a minute."

"Tell me," he demanded. "Is Mia in there? I can smell her you know...she smells nice and pretty..."

"Michael, unless you plan on seeing your little sister naked then I suggest you leave," she replied.

The others started laughing. "Fine. We gotta hurry though. Being drunk in public is illegal."

She rolled her eyes. "Just go...go ride the elevator for a minute. Pretend you are the elevator operators. It'll totally freak out the neighbors."

I heard some laughter and then the elevators open.

"Drunk men are such pushovers," she started. "Tony, I'm gonna go for a walk."

"Okay babe. Where are the guys?"

"I think they wanted to ride the elevators for a little while," she replied, grabbing our coats. "Come on," she whispered.

We walked to a coffee shop in silence. We arrived and sat down, "So? Explain."

I stared into my coffee cup and then sighed, "It was a one time thing...I thought you knew about it."

"Does this look like the face of someone who knew her best friend slept with her brother?"

I laughed. "No...but I mean, the tension he and I had between us after the prom."

"It was prom night? Oh, duh! Of course! That explains everything!"

"Yeah well, it was just that one time."

'Why not again?" she asked immediately.

I laughed. "Because it wasn't right."

"He was THAT bad?"

I laughed again, "No, not at all. Trust me on that one..." I said with a smile. "No, he was quite satisfactory."

"Okay, don't need those details. You could just say that you were left a satisfied woman."

I didn't say anything, I got stuck in the memory of that night. About how it felt to have him holding onto me like he was afraid of losing me. Like he was afraid it was all a dream. My throat went dry as I remembered how he made me feel.

He made me feel like I had never felt before. I had become very aware of my body that night and everything that went along with it. He made me realize that my body was attractive. He made me feel beautiful and wanted.

"I'm sure he knew quite a few neat positions considering his experiences with Vicky."

Her name took me out of my day dream. "Right. So, that's why we never...we didn't..."

She took a long sip of her coffee, "She was just a fill in, ya know."

I stirred my coffee, "It doesn't matter anyways. I love Joshua with all my heart."

"Don't you ever think back to it though? And wonder what if?"

"Lilly, it would have never worked out. I'm a princess, in case you don't remember. He lives in America. Plus, I choose not to live in a what if kind of world."

"So, Joshua lives in England."

"That's a bit easier of a commute."

"So, that's the only reason it wouldn't have worked out?"
"Well, look at his girlfriend, Vicky. Look at me. We are complete opposites. She's like a model and I'm like...well, not."

Lilly rolled her eyes and glanced at her watch. "I better get back before he thinks I've been attacked. Do you want me to walk you back to the loft?"

I shook my head, "No...I'll be fine. I think I wanna stay here for a bit."

"I'll tell Michael you said hi," she said with a wink. "He's gonna flip when I tell him that you had been on the other side of the door and heard every drunken word."

"Go ahead," I said, biting my lip. "See if I care." She knew I did though.

What was he going to say? Would he go searching for me? Would he care even? I mean, he was just drunk. He can't possibly like me like that still.

Would I care if he did? I mean, that he still liked me? Where would that put Joshua? No, Michael had tact. If he did have feelings for me I would simply tell him I had a boyfriend. Then he'd back off. He'd respect me enough to stay away and just be a pal.

Cuz that's all Michael and I ever could be. Pals. Pals that once slept together. People can sleep together and remain just friends, right?