CHAPTER 14: THE CURSE OF THE MISSING $1.95 TIARA

Paige smiled flirtatiously with her ghostly assailant. True he technically kidnapped her, but he was such a hot young dead thing she couldn't resist. She knew she probably shouldn't cheat on Spinner, but since her refridgerator was always stocked with ketchup and ham she knew her honeybee would never leave her. Not unless he finally figured out his own growing homosexuality, but then he'd just go after her brother Dylan and Dylan always shared his slaves. Just look at Marco!

So Paige felt she had nothing to worry about, macking on this ghost-hottie. Besides he was dead anyway so it's not like they'd be seen at the mall or something. Everything was fine!

"So how long have you been dead?" Paige asked seductively. "I bet it's been a long, long time."

"Yeah, about twenty-two years," the ghost said casually.

"Ooh, that sounds so…lonely. Why, I bet you're lonely all the time, aren't you?" she asked, trying to rub his arm. Paige discovered it was much harder flirting with ghosts—when you tried to touch them, your hand went right through! Though that does have possibilities…she thought coyly.

"Yeah, I guess sometimes it can get kind of dull. But you know, I have a good li—er, death. I don't eat, so I don't have to worry about going to the gym anymore. And besides, I get to live in this spooky old house. And omigod, I didn't even tell you the best part!"

"Yeah?" Paige purred. "What's the best part?"

"The clothes! My mom left all her dresses here. Oh god, I look so awesome in them. Of course they're hard to get on, what with me being a ghost and all, but man is it ever worth it!"

Paige fumed inwardly. How dare he ignore her advances! If this were any other boy, she'd tackle him with kisses. But unfortunately, she'd just fall through him and crack her skull. Paige sighed. This so wasn't going as she had planned.

"Hey, Paige. There's something I've been meaning to ask you…"

"What is it?" Paige asked, perking up immediately. She knew what was bound to happen next!

"Do you like shopping? Oh, I so wish I could go, but I'm not allowed to leave this damned house! So I was thinking, next time you're at Saks Fifth Avenue or wherever it is you got that fabulous sweater, can you pick me up something? Please? God, I would be so grateful! Why, I'd do anything!"

Paige smiled. "Anything, huh?"

XxX

"Dude, where's Paige?" Spinner asked.

"Dude, I don't know," Craig replied.

"Dude, I can't make any decisions without my lambsuckle, dude," Spinner whined.

"Dude, just relax. She's probably just shopping with some dudes or dudettes. It ain't no thang," Jimmy reassured Spinner.

"Dudes!" Emma cried. "I am like so sorry about the other night."

"Alright, Emma's back!" Craig cried triumphantly.

"Omigod, Em, I just love your new shoes! Where did you get them? They are to die for! To die!" Marco gushed.

Emma smiled. "A girl never reveals her secrets, you know that."

"But, uh! Shopping buddies!" Marco complained, hooking arms with Emma.

Emma grinned. "Oh, alright. They're about $2.76 at Payless."

"Awesome!" Marco cried.

"So Emma, what did you do last night?" Craig asked.

"Yeah, what did you do? Throw a wild party?" Spinner asked.

"Dude, you know I can't. Not after the last time. I'm waiting for the parentals to relax a little before I get back into the swing," Emma reminded Spinner. He was so silly and forgetful!

"Emma! Emma! You forgot your bra!" someone called.

Emma turned around, aghast. Running after her was none other than Ellie Nash! Right in front of all her friends!

"Emma…you're with Ellie?" Craig asked, heartbroken that his hugest crush in the world had turned gay on him all the sudden.

"Oh, snap!" Spinner shouted out joyously.