CHAPTER FIFTEEN: EMMA, YOU WEAR BRAS?
"So Emma…how long have you been wearing bras?" Marco asked, admiring the shiny red object in Ellie's arms.
Emma blushed furiously. How dare her girlfriend show up in front of the guys! She had a reputation to protect! She had manliness to play into!
But now her stupid girlfriend had to go and ruin everything. Now she'd never be "one of the guys". She'd always be the lithe blonde hippie activist with a chip on her shoulder and lesbian tendencies.
"God, I forgot you were a chick dude," Spinner added.
"Spin…of course she's a chick. I mean look at her! No package. What kind of guy would wear pants that tight with nothing showing?" Jimmy asked, pointing to Emma's genital area.
"El…how could you do this to me?" Emma demanded.
"Em, I'm so sorry. I didn't even see these guys! How should I have known they were out here? And heyyy…why are you with them, anyway? Emma! Are you cheating on me already? Jeez, I thought we'd at least have a couple months! Manny has been some influence on you, hasn't she? You're just like her! A slut!"
"Ellie! Wait! They're just my…friends," Emma sighed, her voice trailing. Ellie had left her. And took her sexy lingerie with her! Emma fumed inwardly.
Craig put a hand on Emma's shoulder. "It's okay honey. Ellie will come around. And if she doesn't…"
Emma noticed for the first time the looks she was getting from Craig, Spinner, Jimmy, even Marco. "Oh no guys. I may be the life of the party, but not that party."
"Awww," they all said in unison.
"Look, I'm sorry. But a girl's got to have standards! Ask me again in a week or so. I have to mourn my lost love."
"Okay, Emma. I respect and admire your decision to give yourself time to heal. I'll wait for you, forever if I have to," Craig sighed. Emma smiled affectionately and scampered off.
"Dude, you're a fag."
Craig turned around, his eyes glowering like two angry wolfhounds that were inside eyeballs. His face softened. "Marco? You're not allowed to say fag."
"Why not? I am a fag! The only fag here, in fact!"
"Exactly. You have to respect your own culture, dude. Now take off that silly hat!"
Marco took the hat off, tears welling in his eyes. No one understood his obsession with inappropriate headware! No one understood it, or him, at all!