***
New chapter! Time for baby B/A to be born! *g* Only 1 more chapter left in this fic. And just to make sure everyone knows, there is still more to come in this series. There will be 5 fics total (this is the 3rd one).
Thank you to all of the wonderful people who sent me feedback on the last part! You guys are absolutely awesome and I really appreciate everything you've said to me about this fic and series!!!
~Isis
***
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Part 9
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Cordelia nearly fell off her seat at the words that came from Buffy's mouth. "BUT IT'S NOT TIME! YOU STILL HAVE 2 WEEKS TO GO!!!" she shouted loudly and pointed at the wall calendar with a big red circle around the approximate due date.
"I don't think the baby cares...ugh," she doubled over as more pain rippled through her abdomen. Didn't those books say labor was supposed to start out slow? Buffy was sure they had, but obviously, she had to do things the difficult way, just like everything else in her life.
Sheer panic took over the room as everyone started talking and moving around at once. In any other situation, Buffy would have found it endlessly amusing, but at the moment, it was just annoying as hell. Her attempts to break up the confusion were met with deaf ears as all of the other occupants of the room were too busy arguing. She shook her head and wondered if she'd be better off getting herself to the hospital. It could take them two hours just do decide what do to.
Willow, realizing that they were only making things worse, took control of the situation. "Everybody STOP!"
The chatter and movement in the room ceased, each person turning to stare at the redhead who'd just shouted at them. When Willow saw that she had everyone's attention, she proceeded.
"Ok...now...Oz, go down and get the van, pull it up to the curb in front of the club and wait for us. Lorne, go upstairs and get Buffy's bag. It's just inside her bedroom. Doyle and Cordy, you two help Buffy get her coat on and get her downstairs. I'm going to call the hospital and let them know we are on our way...err, well, I will once someone tells me where we are going," she finished off her orders, but noticed everyone just standing their staring at her. "MOVE IT, PEOPLE!"
Willow's final directive sent its recipients scurrying from the room in order to carry out their chores. Despite the pain and nervousness she was feeling, Buffy giggled at the sight of her quiet, shy friend taking charge. Her amusement was cut short as another contraction wracked through her body.
The next minutes flew by in a rush of words and hasty movements as Cordy and Doyle stuffed Buffy's arms into her coat and supported her to the elevator. They staggered through the club, through the front door and found Oz as well as Lorne and Willow waiting in the van for them. After a short argument over where they should put Buffy, making her feeling somewhat like an object, they settled on the open area in the back and took off for the hospital.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
Outside the delivery room, both Doyle and Oz winced when they heard a blood-curdling scream come from Buffy. Each contraction seemed to be bringing a louder and louder reaction from the Slayer. They could only imagine what was going on inside the room where Buffy was about to have her baby, and both were just a little glad that they'd opted to wait in the hallway.
"Maybe I should have brought earplugs," Doyle mumbled half to himself and half to Oz.
"No kidding," Oz agreed, his thoughts drifting to what Willow would be like in that situation.
Inside the room, Buffy was covered in sweat and panting as if she'd just run a marathon. Cordelia stood on one side, holding a cool cloth to Buffy's forehead while Willow stood on the other side hoping that her hand would survive this ordeal. The labor was progressing extremely quickly, especially for someone having her first child, but rapid pace did nothing to ease the painful contractions. Willow wanted to shout in relief as Buffy finally released her hand until she found herself being pulled closer to Buffy by her sleeve.
"I am never, and I mean NEVER, HAVING SEX AGAIN!" the blonde screamed through gritted teeth, receiving a mild chuckle from her doctor. Her very male doctor. Buffy turned her glare to the man between her legs, "why don't YOU try squeezing something the size of a watermelon out of YOUR body!"
The doctor ignored the ranting, having heard it many, many times before. "Just a few more pushes, Buffy."
"You can do it, Buffy. Soon you'll be able to hold your baby," encouraged Willow, picking up Buffy's hand once again.
"Yeah, and we'll finally know what it's going to be!" Cordelia added, removing the cloth and re-soaking it in cold water.
Willow rolled her eyes at the comment and then soon found herself distracted by the death grip on her hand as another contraction seized her friend. The next few minutes flew by in a haze of words and movement as the doctor began the delivery of the baby.
"One more! PUSH!" the doctor urged from the end of the bed.
Buffy fought the urge impale her doctor with a stake and clutched at her propped up knees. With a deep breath, she pushed as hard as possible, releasing one final scream. She fell back to the bed, panting, as the first cries of her baby reached her ears.
"Congratulations, Buffy! It's a girl!" he held up the newborn for Buffy, and the others to see.
If she hadn't already known what love at first site was like, Buffy would have the very moment her eyes landed on the precious baby that was hers. Tears freely streamed down her cheeks as she took in each and every inch of the screaming child in the doctor's hands. Of their own free will, her arms reached out, silently pleading with the doctor to let her hold her baby. Happily obligingly, he carefully placed the little girl on Buffy's chest and stepped back, a smile on his face at the sight of the happy mother.
Buffy stared in utter awe at the tiny bundle gazing up at her. Never in her life had she felt what she was feeling right then. This small, helpless person was her daughter. Her DAUGHTER! The very idea was mind boggling, but yet it felt so natural, so perfect. She sobered for a moment. Well...it wasn't entirely perfect. There was one key ingredient missing, her Angel. She wished that he could be standing there by her side, a goofy grin plastered on his face as he watched her hold their child. But he wasn't there. So instead she held on tightly to her daughter, knowing it was her last, and only, link to the man who would forever hold a piece of her heart.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
A timid knock on the door aroused Buffy as she dozed. Opening her eyes and raising her head slightly, she saw Cordy peeking her head into the room with an apologetic look on her face.
"Hey," Buffy mumbled, rubbing her eyes.
"Hey. Sorry to bother you," apologized Cordy, taking a step into the room. "Are you up for guests?"
"Yeah," she spoke, letting a small yawn out. "But not for long, and tell them to be quite. I don't want to wake her up."
"Kay," Cordy nodded and looked toward the bassinet next to the bed where the baby was sleeping. She opened the door and motioned, murmured a few words to the people on the other side and then allowed them to enter.
"Hey, Buffy," Oz greeted her quietly.
"You look exhausted," Doyle pointed out bluntly.
"Gee, what a gentleman," Buffy chuckled, making herself more comfortable, which was difficult considering her body ached all over.
"She just gave birth you moron!" Cordy whacked him lightly on the shoulder.
"I know," Doyle grinned teasingly.
Willow walked over to the bassinet and gazed down at the sleeping newborn. "She's beautiful, Buffy!"
"I know," Buffy answered, a dazzling smile gracing her face. She reached a hand out and placed a feather-light touch on her daughter's cheek.
"Speaking of *she*," Cordy interjected, cocking her head and looking at the baby. "Have you decided on a name yet?"
Buffy looked up at her friends, chewing on her lip. "Yeah."
"Well?" the ex-cheerleader asking impatiently.
"Ashlynn Darcy Summers," Buffy recited contentedly.
The smile on Doyle's face slipped minutely. Sharing a look with Buffy, he nodded his head almost imperceptibly. "It's perfect."
"I agree," Willow smiled as she leaned back against Oz.
"Hmm, well, it could have been worse. Of course, anything is better than Buffy," Cordelia pondered out loud, ignoring the annoyed glare from Buffy. "Where'd you come up with it?"
Buffy shrugged, casting her eyes down to her hands which were fiddling with the hem of the blanket. "I looked at baby sites on the 'net."
Cordelia frowned at the evasive answer, but decided not to push it. She'd question Doyle about it later. The look he'd shared with Buffy hadn't been missed by her. "Well, I suppose it'll do."
"Thank you so much, Cordy," Buffy snort indignantly before yawning once more.
"I think we should let Buffy get some sleep," Oz interrupted the friendly bickering.
"Okay," Doyle agreed and then turned to Buffy. "We're going to make sure someone is here at all times. I don't want to take any chances while you're here in the hospital. I doubt anything would happen, nobody really knows that the Slayer is even in Seattle, but I don't want to take any chances."
"Sure, whatever," Buffy murmured, her eyes already drifting closed.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
A few hours later, Willow gently opened the door to Buffy's room, intent on making sure Buffy was doing okay without waking her up, but found her friend sitting up in bed, nursing her daughter. The redhead blushed furiously, mumbling her apologies before attempting to leave the room.
"No, it's okay, Will. You can stay," Buffy motioned for her to have a seat with her free hand.
Willow conceded, albeit it nervously, but then again, she supposed it was a natural thing for a mother to breast feed her child. She was still having trouble processing the very real fact that Buffy was a mother. They were the same age and she couldn't even begin to imagine herself being a parent, but Buffy had always been stronger, emotionally and physically, than her.
"How come you're still here?" Buffy pondered out loud.
"Oh, well, Doyle and Cordy decided to go out and get something to eat so Oz and I are on 'guard duty'," she repeated Doyle's choice phrasing. "He's a bit overprotective."
"Yeah, he is," Buffy glanced down at her daughter. "But I guess he has reason to worry, and he's been a really good friend."
"So, uh, h-how are you doing?" she stuttered awkwardly, trying to keep her eyes off Buffy's bared chest.
"I'm...good, considering. I think my Slayer powers are speeding up the healing process a little. I don't feel as sore as a couple hours ago," Buffy relayed in relief, her eyes fixated on the suckling of her daughter.
"That's good," Willow nodded, relaxing a bit. "The whole...process seemed a bit, uh, painful."
"That's putting it mildly," Buffy grimaced at the memory. "Those baby books do nothing to prepare you for what it feels like."
"Well, if they told the whole truth, they'd probably scare everyone off from having kids," joked Willow, handing Buffy the burping rag she was trying to reach.
"True," agreed Buffy heartily while lifting the baby to burp her. The action seemed almost natural despite the newness of it.
Once through, she rocked the baby for a few moments, lulling her to sleep. She supposed the ordeal of being born had worn not just herself out, but also her daughter, because the newborn was soon fast asleep. Placing her back into the bassinet, Buffy tucked the blanket around her, staring at the wonder that was her daughter. The very phrase daughter still struck a chord in her heart. She raised her fingertips to her lips, kissing the lightly, before placing them on her baby's cheek.
Willow smiled at the gesture, watching the interaction between the two. "You are a natural with her."
"Ya know," Buffy started and sat herself up a little higher in the bed. "It feels kinda natural. I thought I'd be nervous, and not know what to do, but I'm not."
"Motherly instinct," filled in Willow.
"Maybe," Buffy shrugged noncommittally. "I've been meaning to ask you. When are you guys going back to Sunnydale?" The question had been on her mind, but she kept forgetting to ask. She knew they'd have to go back sooner or later, despite how much they'd miss each other.
"Umm, well, actually...," she paused, not sure of what she wanted to say.
"I mean, I know you have to go back, but I'm going to miss you," Buffy tried to hold back the frown that was threatening.
"We've, uh,...well, we've been considering staying," Willow spoke, stumbling over her words. She wasn't sure how Buffy would take the idea of her and Oz moving to Seattle.
"What?" Buffy spoke, a little louder than intended. Her eyes shot to her sleeping daughter, relieved to find her still fast asleep.
"We haven't actually decided, but we have been talking about it," Willow furthered.
"But...but...what about everything in Sunnydale? And don't you have to go back to school?" Buffy questioned in shock over what Willow had said. She'd figured they were on Spring Break and that was why they'd been able to stay a few days, and that they'd have to return soon.
"Umm...well, I kinda didn't register this semester," Willow replied meekly.
"You what? But why?" Buffy questioned, totally flabbergasted. Willow and school were synonymous. She couldn't believe her friend had dropped out.
Willow sighed and leaned back in her chair. "I decided to take a semester off. Things were kinda...rough."
"What happened?" Buffy was suddenly feeling a little guilty over things she must have missed in Willow's life.
"Right after last semester ended, my parents came home one night and informed me that they had sold the house and were moving to South Africa for some research thing. They told me I could go with them, or...not go with them," she explained, trying to mask the hurt at her parents' careless actions. "I decided to stay."
"Wow....that's harsh," Buffy frowned, remembering how clueless Willow's family seemed to be.
"Yeah, well, that's them for you," Willow rolled her eyes.
"So what did you do?" asked Buffy, taking a sip from the glass of water on her bed-side table.
"They didn't offer to help me find a place to live, so I ended up staying at Oz's house. His parents didn't seem to care. I was going to go back to college for the second semester. My parents had said they would still pay for school, but...I don't know...I just needed some time," the redhead conveyed, still feeling confusion over where her life was going.
"Okay...so, you don't have to go back to school this semester. What about Oz? Wasn't he going?" Buffy continued her questioning, trying to figure how it would be possible for them to move. Not that she didn't want them to, it was just unexpected.
Willow shrugged for what seemed like the millionth time. "He ended up not going second semester either. The band had been talking about touring so he didn't want to deal with classes and road dates."
"Understandable," Buffy concurred in agreement. She'd often wondered when she was still back in Sunnydale how college was going to mesh with her slaying, but she'd escaped that responsibility. Of course, now she had an even bigger one; her daughter.
"Yeah, so we both just skipped out," Willow stated, tugging on her sleeve. "I've been working on my magic, and Oz has been practicing with the band."
"What about the band? How can you move with them being located in Sunnydale? And what about the tour?" Buffy added to her already numerous questions.
"See, that's the funny thing," began Willow, shaking her head slightly. "Oz and I had been looking up places for them to play, and we'd just found the information that led us to what we thought was you, when Devon just up and decided he didn't want to be in the band any more."
"He didn't want to-...ok, why doesn't that surprise me?" Buffy chuckled at the oddness that was Devon.
"I know, really" Willow laughed along with Buffy. "So we don't exactly have anything holding us in Sunnydale. And...and it's just not the same without you there."
"Oh, Willow," Buffy fought, and lost, the battle not to cry. She reached her arms out to hug her friend.
The two females, glad to once again be a part of each other's lives, embraced tightly, crying happy tears, until Buffy winced in mild pain. Willow pulled back and looked at her in confusion.
"Did I hurt you," she asked in concern.
"Oh...not really...they, umm," Buffy looked down at her breasts. "They're, uh, just a little tender."
Willow turned a brilliant shade of red, but eventually both girl burst into quiet laughter over the silly situation.
"I guess I'll have to get used to that kind of thing," Willow stated. "The breast feeding, and all that."
"Yeah," Buffy smiled and looked down at her peacefully sleeping daughter. "So I guess you're moving?"
"Guess so," Willow sat back down in her chair. "I'll have to talk to Oz, but you know him. He goes along with anything."
"Yup, that's Oz for ya," Buffy stated knowingly.
"We'll probably have to go back to Sunnydale to get the rest of our stuff, though," Willow added, internally groaning over having to drive all the way back home, actually she corrected herself, what used to be her home.
"I'm glad you're staying," Buffy looked at her friend sincerely.
"Me, too," Willow smiled happily.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
"What was all that about?" Cordelia questioned out of the blue the moment she and Doyle left the hospital.
"What was what about, Princess?" he turned to look at his sort of girlfriend, wondering what he'd done this time. He seemed to be able to piss her off at the drop of a pin.
"Back at the hospital." At his confused look, she explained further. "Buffy told us the baby's name, and you gave her this look. Then she got that sad face. Ya know the one that means she is thinking of Angel."
"Oh, that. It was...er it...," he blustered, surprised she'd picked up on the fleeting glance to Buffy. "It was just the meaning of the names she picked."
"The meanings?" Cordy repeated, not understanding.
"The names, both first and middle, are Irish," he told her, thinking it would make the issue clearer.
"So?" Cordy looked at him with a raised eyebrow.
Doyle sighed. He lo-...err, liked her dearly, but she could be a bit dense at times. "Angel is Irish, and she picked Irish names. The names also have meanings which are a bit...significant."
"Oh," Cordy mumbled, suddenly getting his point. "What are the meanings?"
"Well, they tend to vary a bit, but Ashlynn can mean 'vision' or 'dream', which you can kinda see why she'd pick that. But that other one...," he trailed off, his thoughts on the heartbroken Slayer. "Darcy can often mean 'descendant of the dark one'."
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
~a few days later~
She was finally alone. Ever since returning from the hospital earlier that day, Buffy had been constantly surrounded by people. They had all wanted to see her and the baby and had crowded around her at every possible moment. It was completely overwhelming and tiring. Now, though, she was alone in her room, her cooing daughter cradled in her arms as she stood staring out of the large window next to her bed. She couldn't help but stare at the tiny life that was her daughter.
Ashlynn Darcy Summers.
Buffy wondered if maybe that hadn't been the best choice of names for her daughter. Her child alone was going to be a constant, everyday reminder of the one thing she wanted most, and could never have. And then she had to go and chose a name that was a direct link to the man that was gone from her life. Did she really want more reminders? Then again, Buffy thought with a sad smile, she really didn't need anything to make her miss Angel. He would always be a part of her, physically and emotionally.
As much as it pained her to admit it, though, Buffy knew that she couldn't spend the rest of her life dwelling on her past. Angel had walked away from her. He had made that choice alone. She couldn't spend the next however many years she is alive wanting to change what could not be changed, especially now that she had Ashlynn depending on her. From here on out, she was going to be somebody's mother, and she was damn sure she would do her best to be a good one. Maybe she'd never be able to let Angel go, but she knew in her heart that it was time to focus on more important things, like her daughter.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
TBC!!
New chapter! Time for baby B/A to be born! *g* Only 1 more chapter left in this fic. And just to make sure everyone knows, there is still more to come in this series. There will be 5 fics total (this is the 3rd one).
Thank you to all of the wonderful people who sent me feedback on the last part! You guys are absolutely awesome and I really appreciate everything you've said to me about this fic and series!!!
~Isis
***
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Part 9
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Cordelia nearly fell off her seat at the words that came from Buffy's mouth. "BUT IT'S NOT TIME! YOU STILL HAVE 2 WEEKS TO GO!!!" she shouted loudly and pointed at the wall calendar with a big red circle around the approximate due date.
"I don't think the baby cares...ugh," she doubled over as more pain rippled through her abdomen. Didn't those books say labor was supposed to start out slow? Buffy was sure they had, but obviously, she had to do things the difficult way, just like everything else in her life.
Sheer panic took over the room as everyone started talking and moving around at once. In any other situation, Buffy would have found it endlessly amusing, but at the moment, it was just annoying as hell. Her attempts to break up the confusion were met with deaf ears as all of the other occupants of the room were too busy arguing. She shook her head and wondered if she'd be better off getting herself to the hospital. It could take them two hours just do decide what do to.
Willow, realizing that they were only making things worse, took control of the situation. "Everybody STOP!"
The chatter and movement in the room ceased, each person turning to stare at the redhead who'd just shouted at them. When Willow saw that she had everyone's attention, she proceeded.
"Ok...now...Oz, go down and get the van, pull it up to the curb in front of the club and wait for us. Lorne, go upstairs and get Buffy's bag. It's just inside her bedroom. Doyle and Cordy, you two help Buffy get her coat on and get her downstairs. I'm going to call the hospital and let them know we are on our way...err, well, I will once someone tells me where we are going," she finished off her orders, but noticed everyone just standing their staring at her. "MOVE IT, PEOPLE!"
Willow's final directive sent its recipients scurrying from the room in order to carry out their chores. Despite the pain and nervousness she was feeling, Buffy giggled at the sight of her quiet, shy friend taking charge. Her amusement was cut short as another contraction wracked through her body.
The next minutes flew by in a rush of words and hasty movements as Cordy and Doyle stuffed Buffy's arms into her coat and supported her to the elevator. They staggered through the club, through the front door and found Oz as well as Lorne and Willow waiting in the van for them. After a short argument over where they should put Buffy, making her feeling somewhat like an object, they settled on the open area in the back and took off for the hospital.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
Outside the delivery room, both Doyle and Oz winced when they heard a blood-curdling scream come from Buffy. Each contraction seemed to be bringing a louder and louder reaction from the Slayer. They could only imagine what was going on inside the room where Buffy was about to have her baby, and both were just a little glad that they'd opted to wait in the hallway.
"Maybe I should have brought earplugs," Doyle mumbled half to himself and half to Oz.
"No kidding," Oz agreed, his thoughts drifting to what Willow would be like in that situation.
Inside the room, Buffy was covered in sweat and panting as if she'd just run a marathon. Cordelia stood on one side, holding a cool cloth to Buffy's forehead while Willow stood on the other side hoping that her hand would survive this ordeal. The labor was progressing extremely quickly, especially for someone having her first child, but rapid pace did nothing to ease the painful contractions. Willow wanted to shout in relief as Buffy finally released her hand until she found herself being pulled closer to Buffy by her sleeve.
"I am never, and I mean NEVER, HAVING SEX AGAIN!" the blonde screamed through gritted teeth, receiving a mild chuckle from her doctor. Her very male doctor. Buffy turned her glare to the man between her legs, "why don't YOU try squeezing something the size of a watermelon out of YOUR body!"
The doctor ignored the ranting, having heard it many, many times before. "Just a few more pushes, Buffy."
"You can do it, Buffy. Soon you'll be able to hold your baby," encouraged Willow, picking up Buffy's hand once again.
"Yeah, and we'll finally know what it's going to be!" Cordelia added, removing the cloth and re-soaking it in cold water.
Willow rolled her eyes at the comment and then soon found herself distracted by the death grip on her hand as another contraction seized her friend. The next few minutes flew by in a haze of words and movement as the doctor began the delivery of the baby.
"One more! PUSH!" the doctor urged from the end of the bed.
Buffy fought the urge impale her doctor with a stake and clutched at her propped up knees. With a deep breath, she pushed as hard as possible, releasing one final scream. She fell back to the bed, panting, as the first cries of her baby reached her ears.
"Congratulations, Buffy! It's a girl!" he held up the newborn for Buffy, and the others to see.
If she hadn't already known what love at first site was like, Buffy would have the very moment her eyes landed on the precious baby that was hers. Tears freely streamed down her cheeks as she took in each and every inch of the screaming child in the doctor's hands. Of their own free will, her arms reached out, silently pleading with the doctor to let her hold her baby. Happily obligingly, he carefully placed the little girl on Buffy's chest and stepped back, a smile on his face at the sight of the happy mother.
Buffy stared in utter awe at the tiny bundle gazing up at her. Never in her life had she felt what she was feeling right then. This small, helpless person was her daughter. Her DAUGHTER! The very idea was mind boggling, but yet it felt so natural, so perfect. She sobered for a moment. Well...it wasn't entirely perfect. There was one key ingredient missing, her Angel. She wished that he could be standing there by her side, a goofy grin plastered on his face as he watched her hold their child. But he wasn't there. So instead she held on tightly to her daughter, knowing it was her last, and only, link to the man who would forever hold a piece of her heart.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
A timid knock on the door aroused Buffy as she dozed. Opening her eyes and raising her head slightly, she saw Cordy peeking her head into the room with an apologetic look on her face.
"Hey," Buffy mumbled, rubbing her eyes.
"Hey. Sorry to bother you," apologized Cordy, taking a step into the room. "Are you up for guests?"
"Yeah," she spoke, letting a small yawn out. "But not for long, and tell them to be quite. I don't want to wake her up."
"Kay," Cordy nodded and looked toward the bassinet next to the bed where the baby was sleeping. She opened the door and motioned, murmured a few words to the people on the other side and then allowed them to enter.
"Hey, Buffy," Oz greeted her quietly.
"You look exhausted," Doyle pointed out bluntly.
"Gee, what a gentleman," Buffy chuckled, making herself more comfortable, which was difficult considering her body ached all over.
"She just gave birth you moron!" Cordy whacked him lightly on the shoulder.
"I know," Doyle grinned teasingly.
Willow walked over to the bassinet and gazed down at the sleeping newborn. "She's beautiful, Buffy!"
"I know," Buffy answered, a dazzling smile gracing her face. She reached a hand out and placed a feather-light touch on her daughter's cheek.
"Speaking of *she*," Cordy interjected, cocking her head and looking at the baby. "Have you decided on a name yet?"
Buffy looked up at her friends, chewing on her lip. "Yeah."
"Well?" the ex-cheerleader asking impatiently.
"Ashlynn Darcy Summers," Buffy recited contentedly.
The smile on Doyle's face slipped minutely. Sharing a look with Buffy, he nodded his head almost imperceptibly. "It's perfect."
"I agree," Willow smiled as she leaned back against Oz.
"Hmm, well, it could have been worse. Of course, anything is better than Buffy," Cordelia pondered out loud, ignoring the annoyed glare from Buffy. "Where'd you come up with it?"
Buffy shrugged, casting her eyes down to her hands which were fiddling with the hem of the blanket. "I looked at baby sites on the 'net."
Cordelia frowned at the evasive answer, but decided not to push it. She'd question Doyle about it later. The look he'd shared with Buffy hadn't been missed by her. "Well, I suppose it'll do."
"Thank you so much, Cordy," Buffy snort indignantly before yawning once more.
"I think we should let Buffy get some sleep," Oz interrupted the friendly bickering.
"Okay," Doyle agreed and then turned to Buffy. "We're going to make sure someone is here at all times. I don't want to take any chances while you're here in the hospital. I doubt anything would happen, nobody really knows that the Slayer is even in Seattle, but I don't want to take any chances."
"Sure, whatever," Buffy murmured, her eyes already drifting closed.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
A few hours later, Willow gently opened the door to Buffy's room, intent on making sure Buffy was doing okay without waking her up, but found her friend sitting up in bed, nursing her daughter. The redhead blushed furiously, mumbling her apologies before attempting to leave the room.
"No, it's okay, Will. You can stay," Buffy motioned for her to have a seat with her free hand.
Willow conceded, albeit it nervously, but then again, she supposed it was a natural thing for a mother to breast feed her child. She was still having trouble processing the very real fact that Buffy was a mother. They were the same age and she couldn't even begin to imagine herself being a parent, but Buffy had always been stronger, emotionally and physically, than her.
"How come you're still here?" Buffy pondered out loud.
"Oh, well, Doyle and Cordy decided to go out and get something to eat so Oz and I are on 'guard duty'," she repeated Doyle's choice phrasing. "He's a bit overprotective."
"Yeah, he is," Buffy glanced down at her daughter. "But I guess he has reason to worry, and he's been a really good friend."
"So, uh, h-how are you doing?" she stuttered awkwardly, trying to keep her eyes off Buffy's bared chest.
"I'm...good, considering. I think my Slayer powers are speeding up the healing process a little. I don't feel as sore as a couple hours ago," Buffy relayed in relief, her eyes fixated on the suckling of her daughter.
"That's good," Willow nodded, relaxing a bit. "The whole...process seemed a bit, uh, painful."
"That's putting it mildly," Buffy grimaced at the memory. "Those baby books do nothing to prepare you for what it feels like."
"Well, if they told the whole truth, they'd probably scare everyone off from having kids," joked Willow, handing Buffy the burping rag she was trying to reach.
"True," agreed Buffy heartily while lifting the baby to burp her. The action seemed almost natural despite the newness of it.
Once through, she rocked the baby for a few moments, lulling her to sleep. She supposed the ordeal of being born had worn not just herself out, but also her daughter, because the newborn was soon fast asleep. Placing her back into the bassinet, Buffy tucked the blanket around her, staring at the wonder that was her daughter. The very phrase daughter still struck a chord in her heart. She raised her fingertips to her lips, kissing the lightly, before placing them on her baby's cheek.
Willow smiled at the gesture, watching the interaction between the two. "You are a natural with her."
"Ya know," Buffy started and sat herself up a little higher in the bed. "It feels kinda natural. I thought I'd be nervous, and not know what to do, but I'm not."
"Motherly instinct," filled in Willow.
"Maybe," Buffy shrugged noncommittally. "I've been meaning to ask you. When are you guys going back to Sunnydale?" The question had been on her mind, but she kept forgetting to ask. She knew they'd have to go back sooner or later, despite how much they'd miss each other.
"Umm, well, actually...," she paused, not sure of what she wanted to say.
"I mean, I know you have to go back, but I'm going to miss you," Buffy tried to hold back the frown that was threatening.
"We've, uh,...well, we've been considering staying," Willow spoke, stumbling over her words. She wasn't sure how Buffy would take the idea of her and Oz moving to Seattle.
"What?" Buffy spoke, a little louder than intended. Her eyes shot to her sleeping daughter, relieved to find her still fast asleep.
"We haven't actually decided, but we have been talking about it," Willow furthered.
"But...but...what about everything in Sunnydale? And don't you have to go back to school?" Buffy questioned in shock over what Willow had said. She'd figured they were on Spring Break and that was why they'd been able to stay a few days, and that they'd have to return soon.
"Umm...well, I kinda didn't register this semester," Willow replied meekly.
"You what? But why?" Buffy questioned, totally flabbergasted. Willow and school were synonymous. She couldn't believe her friend had dropped out.
Willow sighed and leaned back in her chair. "I decided to take a semester off. Things were kinda...rough."
"What happened?" Buffy was suddenly feeling a little guilty over things she must have missed in Willow's life.
"Right after last semester ended, my parents came home one night and informed me that they had sold the house and were moving to South Africa for some research thing. They told me I could go with them, or...not go with them," she explained, trying to mask the hurt at her parents' careless actions. "I decided to stay."
"Wow....that's harsh," Buffy frowned, remembering how clueless Willow's family seemed to be.
"Yeah, well, that's them for you," Willow rolled her eyes.
"So what did you do?" asked Buffy, taking a sip from the glass of water on her bed-side table.
"They didn't offer to help me find a place to live, so I ended up staying at Oz's house. His parents didn't seem to care. I was going to go back to college for the second semester. My parents had said they would still pay for school, but...I don't know...I just needed some time," the redhead conveyed, still feeling confusion over where her life was going.
"Okay...so, you don't have to go back to school this semester. What about Oz? Wasn't he going?" Buffy continued her questioning, trying to figure how it would be possible for them to move. Not that she didn't want them to, it was just unexpected.
Willow shrugged for what seemed like the millionth time. "He ended up not going second semester either. The band had been talking about touring so he didn't want to deal with classes and road dates."
"Understandable," Buffy concurred in agreement. She'd often wondered when she was still back in Sunnydale how college was going to mesh with her slaying, but she'd escaped that responsibility. Of course, now she had an even bigger one; her daughter.
"Yeah, so we both just skipped out," Willow stated, tugging on her sleeve. "I've been working on my magic, and Oz has been practicing with the band."
"What about the band? How can you move with them being located in Sunnydale? And what about the tour?" Buffy added to her already numerous questions.
"See, that's the funny thing," began Willow, shaking her head slightly. "Oz and I had been looking up places for them to play, and we'd just found the information that led us to what we thought was you, when Devon just up and decided he didn't want to be in the band any more."
"He didn't want to-...ok, why doesn't that surprise me?" Buffy chuckled at the oddness that was Devon.
"I know, really" Willow laughed along with Buffy. "So we don't exactly have anything holding us in Sunnydale. And...and it's just not the same without you there."
"Oh, Willow," Buffy fought, and lost, the battle not to cry. She reached her arms out to hug her friend.
The two females, glad to once again be a part of each other's lives, embraced tightly, crying happy tears, until Buffy winced in mild pain. Willow pulled back and looked at her in confusion.
"Did I hurt you," she asked in concern.
"Oh...not really...they, umm," Buffy looked down at her breasts. "They're, uh, just a little tender."
Willow turned a brilliant shade of red, but eventually both girl burst into quiet laughter over the silly situation.
"I guess I'll have to get used to that kind of thing," Willow stated. "The breast feeding, and all that."
"Yeah," Buffy smiled and looked down at her peacefully sleeping daughter. "So I guess you're moving?"
"Guess so," Willow sat back down in her chair. "I'll have to talk to Oz, but you know him. He goes along with anything."
"Yup, that's Oz for ya," Buffy stated knowingly.
"We'll probably have to go back to Sunnydale to get the rest of our stuff, though," Willow added, internally groaning over having to drive all the way back home, actually she corrected herself, what used to be her home.
"I'm glad you're staying," Buffy looked at her friend sincerely.
"Me, too," Willow smiled happily.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
"What was all that about?" Cordelia questioned out of the blue the moment she and Doyle left the hospital.
"What was what about, Princess?" he turned to look at his sort of girlfriend, wondering what he'd done this time. He seemed to be able to piss her off at the drop of a pin.
"Back at the hospital." At his confused look, she explained further. "Buffy told us the baby's name, and you gave her this look. Then she got that sad face. Ya know the one that means she is thinking of Angel."
"Oh, that. It was...er it...," he blustered, surprised she'd picked up on the fleeting glance to Buffy. "It was just the meaning of the names she picked."
"The meanings?" Cordy repeated, not understanding.
"The names, both first and middle, are Irish," he told her, thinking it would make the issue clearer.
"So?" Cordy looked at him with a raised eyebrow.
Doyle sighed. He lo-...err, liked her dearly, but she could be a bit dense at times. "Angel is Irish, and she picked Irish names. The names also have meanings which are a bit...significant."
"Oh," Cordy mumbled, suddenly getting his point. "What are the meanings?"
"Well, they tend to vary a bit, but Ashlynn can mean 'vision' or 'dream', which you can kinda see why she'd pick that. But that other one...," he trailed off, his thoughts on the heartbroken Slayer. "Darcy can often mean 'descendant of the dark one'."
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
~a few days later~
She was finally alone. Ever since returning from the hospital earlier that day, Buffy had been constantly surrounded by people. They had all wanted to see her and the baby and had crowded around her at every possible moment. It was completely overwhelming and tiring. Now, though, she was alone in her room, her cooing daughter cradled in her arms as she stood staring out of the large window next to her bed. She couldn't help but stare at the tiny life that was her daughter.
Ashlynn Darcy Summers.
Buffy wondered if maybe that hadn't been the best choice of names for her daughter. Her child alone was going to be a constant, everyday reminder of the one thing she wanted most, and could never have. And then she had to go and chose a name that was a direct link to the man that was gone from her life. Did she really want more reminders? Then again, Buffy thought with a sad smile, she really didn't need anything to make her miss Angel. He would always be a part of her, physically and emotionally.
As much as it pained her to admit it, though, Buffy knew that she couldn't spend the rest of her life dwelling on her past. Angel had walked away from her. He had made that choice alone. She couldn't spend the next however many years she is alive wanting to change what could not be changed, especially now that she had Ashlynn depending on her. From here on out, she was going to be somebody's mother, and she was damn sure she would do her best to be a good one. Maybe she'd never be able to let Angel go, but she knew in her heart that it was time to focus on more important things, like her daughter.
^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^
TBC!!