Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine, it is owned by JK Rowling and Warner
Bros and probably a couple of other people I'm forgetting to mention. No
copying or infringement is intended, and you can probably insert a couple
more legal terms in here yourselves, I can't think of anything else to say.
A/N: I know *someone* is reading this, so REVIEW!!!!!!!! If you review, I might not be as lazy as I was and write more often.
A/N 2: And just fyi, these ficlets do not go together plot-wise. I'm grouping them all together as one story just bc it's easier. The facts in the different fics do not correspond. So if you see something that isn't consistent with an earlier chapter, it's because these are all one-shots that I'm grouping together in one story because I'm lazy. And I am definitely lazy because I have had this thing for a long time and was just too lazy to finish it until now.
A/N 3: And I may write more than one chapter for several characters. I have an idea for another Pansy fic going around in my head, and I might turn out another Draco chapter. So, like usual, I am promising absolutely nothing.
Perfect
Everyone thinks I'm stupid
Everyone thinks that I can't even string two words together
Everyone thinks that I only think through my stomach.
I'm sick of what they think
Whenever I speak, whenever I voice an opinion, whenever I want to say something that's on my mind, they all simply take my words and throw them back at me.
If I say something in the passion of the moment, not thinking with my mind, they only take that statement and turn it around so that the meaning is completely distorted and I am taken as the fool once again.
I am sick and tired of it, but I can't tell them.
If I do, they'll only take that statement, point holes in my thesis, and simply bury me in words I simply don't understand and probably never will.
I don't want them to see me cry, so I leave.
I know I'm stupid, I know I'm a prick, I know I'm a glutton, I know I'm not the best person in the world, but they're supposed to be my friends.
They're supposed to stand by me, to encourage me, to it's all right when it really isn't, to support me through thick and thin.
They don't.
They just criticize every single fucking thing that I do, say, think, feel, smell, hear, everything.
I am fucking sick and tired of it.
Just because I do not have their beliefs, they find it all right to walk all over me, using their fancy words and make me feel the fool.
I am sick and tired of it.
I know that if I ever mentioned it to anyone else, perhaps Goyle, he'll merely tell me to not listen to them. I can't to that.
They're my friends.
I know it's not a good thing when your only friends criticize you every second your awake, but they're my friends.
I can't just leave them and find a whole other group.
I've already dug myself in too far for that.
I'm already labeled as one of Malfoy's bodyguards, I'm already labeled as a Slytherin, I'm already labeled as evil.
I can't just leave the Slytherin common room and decide to just walk to the Hufflepuff table and just sit down and expect to make new friends.
Everyone will shy away from me all because of the name I have acquired for myself.
I'm in too deep.
They tell me not to listen to them.
I have to though.
He knows everything, and he teaches me.
He can be kind, but I know what else he can be.
He can be like the poison that circulates through your blood, slowly killing you, while you believe it's actually doing you good.
I know he'll kill me one day.
Maybe he won't be the one to actually point the wand at me and say the two fateful words, but I know that he'll cause my death someday in some shape or form.
So all I want to do is run away.
People take me as brawns and no brains, and they're right, I am.
I don't want to be, but I am.
What they don't realize is that I hate it.
I want to be able to think for myself, to be able to defend my own intellect when the occasion calls for it, to be able to not have to depend on my muscles instead of my magic when I need to stand up to someone.
I know that if I will ever break free from Malfoy, I have to be powerful in more than just a physical sense. I know I'll need to be smart, fast, and have an incredible repertoire of spells at my command, more than Malfoy at least.
Malfoy.
Everything revolves around him
I am unjustly judged because of him, I know I am worthless because of him, I will probably die prematurely because of him, yet he's all I know.
He is the only one that has ever even tried to understand me, so I cling to him like nothing else.
I don't want to, and I curse myself (not literally, I'm not smart enough, I know) for my weakness, but I can't help it.
I don't want to be dependent on him but I can't help it.
I'm weak, because I can't stand by myself, I can't help it.
I'm stupid, I want to believe that it's just my brain capacity, that I can't help it.
But I can.
I'm just stupid because I'm an idiot. When they say those things, they're right. I am everything they say and so much more, so much more.
I hate it when they say that, but I can't fault them for it.
I am stupid.
A/N: Wow, I'm just thinking that this chapter just sucked. I've just been lazy, so that's why there haven't been any updates lately.
A/N: I know *someone* is reading this, so REVIEW!!!!!!!! If you review, I might not be as lazy as I was and write more often.
A/N 2: And just fyi, these ficlets do not go together plot-wise. I'm grouping them all together as one story just bc it's easier. The facts in the different fics do not correspond. So if you see something that isn't consistent with an earlier chapter, it's because these are all one-shots that I'm grouping together in one story because I'm lazy. And I am definitely lazy because I have had this thing for a long time and was just too lazy to finish it until now.
A/N 3: And I may write more than one chapter for several characters. I have an idea for another Pansy fic going around in my head, and I might turn out another Draco chapter. So, like usual, I am promising absolutely nothing.
Perfect
Everyone thinks I'm stupid
Everyone thinks that I can't even string two words together
Everyone thinks that I only think through my stomach.
I'm sick of what they think
Whenever I speak, whenever I voice an opinion, whenever I want to say something that's on my mind, they all simply take my words and throw them back at me.
If I say something in the passion of the moment, not thinking with my mind, they only take that statement and turn it around so that the meaning is completely distorted and I am taken as the fool once again.
I am sick and tired of it, but I can't tell them.
If I do, they'll only take that statement, point holes in my thesis, and simply bury me in words I simply don't understand and probably never will.
I don't want them to see me cry, so I leave.
I know I'm stupid, I know I'm a prick, I know I'm a glutton, I know I'm not the best person in the world, but they're supposed to be my friends.
They're supposed to stand by me, to encourage me, to it's all right when it really isn't, to support me through thick and thin.
They don't.
They just criticize every single fucking thing that I do, say, think, feel, smell, hear, everything.
I am fucking sick and tired of it.
Just because I do not have their beliefs, they find it all right to walk all over me, using their fancy words and make me feel the fool.
I am sick and tired of it.
I know that if I ever mentioned it to anyone else, perhaps Goyle, he'll merely tell me to not listen to them. I can't to that.
They're my friends.
I know it's not a good thing when your only friends criticize you every second your awake, but they're my friends.
I can't just leave them and find a whole other group.
I've already dug myself in too far for that.
I'm already labeled as one of Malfoy's bodyguards, I'm already labeled as a Slytherin, I'm already labeled as evil.
I can't just leave the Slytherin common room and decide to just walk to the Hufflepuff table and just sit down and expect to make new friends.
Everyone will shy away from me all because of the name I have acquired for myself.
I'm in too deep.
They tell me not to listen to them.
I have to though.
He knows everything, and he teaches me.
He can be kind, but I know what else he can be.
He can be like the poison that circulates through your blood, slowly killing you, while you believe it's actually doing you good.
I know he'll kill me one day.
Maybe he won't be the one to actually point the wand at me and say the two fateful words, but I know that he'll cause my death someday in some shape or form.
So all I want to do is run away.
People take me as brawns and no brains, and they're right, I am.
I don't want to be, but I am.
What they don't realize is that I hate it.
I want to be able to think for myself, to be able to defend my own intellect when the occasion calls for it, to be able to not have to depend on my muscles instead of my magic when I need to stand up to someone.
I know that if I will ever break free from Malfoy, I have to be powerful in more than just a physical sense. I know I'll need to be smart, fast, and have an incredible repertoire of spells at my command, more than Malfoy at least.
Malfoy.
Everything revolves around him
I am unjustly judged because of him, I know I am worthless because of him, I will probably die prematurely because of him, yet he's all I know.
He is the only one that has ever even tried to understand me, so I cling to him like nothing else.
I don't want to, and I curse myself (not literally, I'm not smart enough, I know) for my weakness, but I can't help it.
I don't want to be dependent on him but I can't help it.
I'm weak, because I can't stand by myself, I can't help it.
I'm stupid, I want to believe that it's just my brain capacity, that I can't help it.
But I can.
I'm just stupid because I'm an idiot. When they say those things, they're right. I am everything they say and so much more, so much more.
I hate it when they say that, but I can't fault them for it.
I am stupid.
A/N: Wow, I'm just thinking that this chapter just sucked. I've just been lazy, so that's why there haven't been any updates lately.