((gasps I would be honoured to make a guest appearance in the Mary-Sue
bashing fic, Swimmerkitti!! dances around in a happy little circle singing
the "llama song" Maybe some psycho freak blonde with glasses can try to
kill Kat because she is jealous that Freddy likes Kat!!! j/k, but I would
love to make a guest appearance though... beams Okay, ANYways, the eraser
part of this one really happened to someone I know so, Leanna, I dedicate
this to you! And my coughevilcough brother Tyler for the raisin thing...
hehe -Okay, warning to all readers- PLEASE do NOT attempt to try these
things at home...- (you'll see what I mean...) I go again on my own! guitar
sounds: der! Der! Writing the only fic that I've ever kno-own!! guitar
sounds: der! Der! Wait- that's not true! This is not the only fic I have
ever known! So just ignore me and we will all be fine...))
Chapter Four: First Lesson In Life
"Are we there yet?" Michelle complained for the fifth time from inside the crowded limo. Ever since "Chitty" had broken down, they had been forced to travel in one limo- with all of their equipment- to Cincinnati. Of course Dewey got to ride in the front... Lawrence, in the seat by her, yawned. Did Michelle and Eleni have to talk so loud?!
"If we were there, we would be getting off in- duh!" Freddy snorted from beside him. Michelle just gave him an evil glare back. Lawrence tried not to laugh at her scrunched up face.
"You guys- I was trying to sleep!!" Katie moaned, sitting upright. Lawrence knew the feeling...
"Yeah, well try harder..." Zach grumbled. Everyone was tired from a late night- and they still had two more hours in the car. And after that they had to perform! Ugh!
"Let's do something to pass the time." Lawrence suggested.
"Like what?" Alicia asked. Lawrence just shrugged. He mainly just started ideas and let the group finish them. Besides- he was too tired to care at this point.
"I've already played hangman twenty two times." Leonard informed them.
"And if anybody sings one more song I will puke!" Billy chipped in. "And trust me- nobody wants me to get puke over my newest outfits- that would be sooo 1800's..."
"Come on you guys! Look at the passing scenery! Just enjoy it... for a while..." Summer tried, gazing out the tinted windows. Lawrence, as well as everybody else, did the same.
Cows... cornfield... more cows... more corn... hey look- a squirrel! No... it was just some corn by a cow...
"Arrgh... I would look at the passing scenery- if there was any!!" Frankie grumbled.
"Hey- give me that pencil." Freddy asked Leonard, stretching out his hand. When he got it he held it out to Lawrence.
"Huh?" Lawrence asked. Why was Freddy giving him a pencil.
"I dare you to stick it in your ear, dude!" Freddy grinned. Okay... Lawrence decided, Freddy has finally lost it...
"Why?" Marco, Marta, Leonard, Frankie, and Summer all chorused at once.
"Yeah, man, I was just about to ask the same thing..." Zach wondered. Freddy just shrugged.
"It's something to do. I wanna see what happens!" He replied. Lawrence got an idea.
"Fine- but only if you put this raisin up your nose! I've always wanted to see if it was true that it'll turn back into a grape up there..." Lawrence grinned, taking one of those small packets of raisins that all clump together like dirt out of one of the compartments. Freddy grimaced at first, but then grinned.
"You're on!" He claimed.
"Go Mr. Cool!" Katie laughed as Lawrence slowly stuck the pencil into his ear- eraser first- and Freddy slowly shoved the raisin up his nostril.
"You two are SO wrong!" Summer scolded them before turning to look out the window some more.
Weird... it's kind of like a colder version of one of those ear cleaner things... weird... Lawrence thought. He turned his head and accidentally hit Freddy- who had a huge bulge in his nose.
"Ow man. Dop dat!" Freddy yelled. "Hey! My voice! Id's all weird and... eww... man, dis raisin is uncomfordable..."
"At least you don't have a pencil in your ear! Poor Lawrence- or should I say, Pencil Ear?" Zach snickered. Everyone else was chuckling. Lawrence liked this attention. He wasn't always noticed but when he was he liked it a lot! Even if it meant having a pencil in your ear!...
"I am taking it out now." Lawrence told them a minute or two later. He went to take the No.2 out and pop! Wait- the pencil was in his hand but there was still something in his ear... He looked down at the yellow writing tool. Where was the eraser?
"Oh my God you guys- the eraser is stuck in my ear!" He cried. Immediately, Summer rushed over- pushing Freddy to the side- and looked in his ear.
"Oh my God, you guys... It's so far back..." She grimaced before returning to her seat.
"Dude! You so have an eraser sduck in your ear! Go dell Dewey!" Freddy laughed. He then froze. "You guys. Da raisin's gedding bigger..."
Sure enough the clump that had been in Freddy's nose had expanded since Lawrence had last looked! He laughed.
"At least I don't have a grape stuck in my nose!" Lawrence chuckled. Everyone else in the limo- even Summer- was cracking up.
"Somebody ged Dewey!" Freddy exclaimed. "Id's sdarding to hurd!!"
"What was that?" Lawrence asked. Oh no... everything from his right ear was getting quieter! Stupid eraser! Man, this was not cool anymore.
"Oh my God! You two look hilarious!" Eleni giggled. Marco nodded as Lawrence shook his head to one side, trying to get the eraser to fall out.
"Yeah, well it doesn'd feel hilarious!" Freddy glared. Lawrence matched it.
"Okay, you two. Cut it out. We'll get Dewey, chill..." Katie smiled, pressing the button that allowed talking from the front of the car to the passenger part.
"Yo, Dewey. I think we got us a problem here. You might want to pull over Mr. Driver Dude." Zach spoke into it.
"Affirmative on that, goat rider! Over and out!" The driver's voice sounded. Lawrence guessed he was some army veteran or something... that would explain the dog tags...
The engine slowed to a stop and everyone hopped out.
"What's up?" Dewey asked, walking over to Lawrence and Freddy. Lawrence turned his ear up and Freddy made sure his nose was visible. Dewey bit his lip.
"This is worse than I thought. Spill the story, NOW." He ordered.
"Well, I dared Lawrence do sdick a pencil in his ear..."
"And I only would do it if he stuck a raisin up his nose...
"And den da eraser got sduck in his ear..."
"And the raisin expanded in his nose." The duo finished. Dewey smiled.
"Hey- cool! I always wondered what would happen if you stuck a raisin up your nose..." Dewey was interrupted by Summer.
"That's not important! How do we get them out?!" She cried.
"Should we call a hospital and ask or something?" Tomika offered her cell phone.
"Sure. Hang on you guys..." Dewey punched in numbers and the group was silent. "Yeah, well, we got an eraser stuck in one kid's ear and a raisin, or a grape by now, stuck up in another's nose... Uh-huh... So that would mean?... What?!... No way... sighs Okay... Yes, we'll be in as quick as we can... bye..." He hung up- but not before slapping both Freddy and Lawrence over the heads.
"You two bimbos! You two have to have the raisin surgically removed now you idiots!" He shouted. Uh-oh, thought Lawrence... this sucks...
"Does that mean we have to miss the show?!" Katie cried out. Dewey nodded solemnly as the band's mouths dropped. No way, Lawrence thought! Ugh! This is all my fault!
"Nice going, Spazzy!" Alicia yelled at Freddy who could only shrug weakly.
"I'm sure we'll all laugh on this years from now, drust me you guys..." Freddy tried to lighten up the cowering group.
"We'll have to see if you live that long first, Freddy Jones!!" Katie threatened as the band piled in the limo, on the way to get to the hospital.
Lawrence tried to consulate the group and said, "Katie; would this be a good time to tell you that we got new muffins?" She glared back at him.
"First lesson in life, kids. Never- I mean never- stick anything up your nose or ear..." Dewey's voice growled through the speaker. Everyone ignored him and gazed out the window again.
Cow... corn field... cow in a corn field... squirrel by a cow in a corn field... a pencil factory... corn field... cows... vineyard... corn field... cows...
Chapter Four: First Lesson In Life
"Are we there yet?" Michelle complained for the fifth time from inside the crowded limo. Ever since "Chitty" had broken down, they had been forced to travel in one limo- with all of their equipment- to Cincinnati. Of course Dewey got to ride in the front... Lawrence, in the seat by her, yawned. Did Michelle and Eleni have to talk so loud?!
"If we were there, we would be getting off in- duh!" Freddy snorted from beside him. Michelle just gave him an evil glare back. Lawrence tried not to laugh at her scrunched up face.
"You guys- I was trying to sleep!!" Katie moaned, sitting upright. Lawrence knew the feeling...
"Yeah, well try harder..." Zach grumbled. Everyone was tired from a late night- and they still had two more hours in the car. And after that they had to perform! Ugh!
"Let's do something to pass the time." Lawrence suggested.
"Like what?" Alicia asked. Lawrence just shrugged. He mainly just started ideas and let the group finish them. Besides- he was too tired to care at this point.
"I've already played hangman twenty two times." Leonard informed them.
"And if anybody sings one more song I will puke!" Billy chipped in. "And trust me- nobody wants me to get puke over my newest outfits- that would be sooo 1800's..."
"Come on you guys! Look at the passing scenery! Just enjoy it... for a while..." Summer tried, gazing out the tinted windows. Lawrence, as well as everybody else, did the same.
Cows... cornfield... more cows... more corn... hey look- a squirrel! No... it was just some corn by a cow...
"Arrgh... I would look at the passing scenery- if there was any!!" Frankie grumbled.
"Hey- give me that pencil." Freddy asked Leonard, stretching out his hand. When he got it he held it out to Lawrence.
"Huh?" Lawrence asked. Why was Freddy giving him a pencil.
"I dare you to stick it in your ear, dude!" Freddy grinned. Okay... Lawrence decided, Freddy has finally lost it...
"Why?" Marco, Marta, Leonard, Frankie, and Summer all chorused at once.
"Yeah, man, I was just about to ask the same thing..." Zach wondered. Freddy just shrugged.
"It's something to do. I wanna see what happens!" He replied. Lawrence got an idea.
"Fine- but only if you put this raisin up your nose! I've always wanted to see if it was true that it'll turn back into a grape up there..." Lawrence grinned, taking one of those small packets of raisins that all clump together like dirt out of one of the compartments. Freddy grimaced at first, but then grinned.
"You're on!" He claimed.
"Go Mr. Cool!" Katie laughed as Lawrence slowly stuck the pencil into his ear- eraser first- and Freddy slowly shoved the raisin up his nostril.
"You two are SO wrong!" Summer scolded them before turning to look out the window some more.
Weird... it's kind of like a colder version of one of those ear cleaner things... weird... Lawrence thought. He turned his head and accidentally hit Freddy- who had a huge bulge in his nose.
"Ow man. Dop dat!" Freddy yelled. "Hey! My voice! Id's all weird and... eww... man, dis raisin is uncomfordable..."
"At least you don't have a pencil in your ear! Poor Lawrence- or should I say, Pencil Ear?" Zach snickered. Everyone else was chuckling. Lawrence liked this attention. He wasn't always noticed but when he was he liked it a lot! Even if it meant having a pencil in your ear!...
"I am taking it out now." Lawrence told them a minute or two later. He went to take the No.2 out and pop! Wait- the pencil was in his hand but there was still something in his ear... He looked down at the yellow writing tool. Where was the eraser?
"Oh my God you guys- the eraser is stuck in my ear!" He cried. Immediately, Summer rushed over- pushing Freddy to the side- and looked in his ear.
"Oh my God, you guys... It's so far back..." She grimaced before returning to her seat.
"Dude! You so have an eraser sduck in your ear! Go dell Dewey!" Freddy laughed. He then froze. "You guys. Da raisin's gedding bigger..."
Sure enough the clump that had been in Freddy's nose had expanded since Lawrence had last looked! He laughed.
"At least I don't have a grape stuck in my nose!" Lawrence chuckled. Everyone else in the limo- even Summer- was cracking up.
"Somebody ged Dewey!" Freddy exclaimed. "Id's sdarding to hurd!!"
"What was that?" Lawrence asked. Oh no... everything from his right ear was getting quieter! Stupid eraser! Man, this was not cool anymore.
"Oh my God! You two look hilarious!" Eleni giggled. Marco nodded as Lawrence shook his head to one side, trying to get the eraser to fall out.
"Yeah, well it doesn'd feel hilarious!" Freddy glared. Lawrence matched it.
"Okay, you two. Cut it out. We'll get Dewey, chill..." Katie smiled, pressing the button that allowed talking from the front of the car to the passenger part.
"Yo, Dewey. I think we got us a problem here. You might want to pull over Mr. Driver Dude." Zach spoke into it.
"Affirmative on that, goat rider! Over and out!" The driver's voice sounded. Lawrence guessed he was some army veteran or something... that would explain the dog tags...
The engine slowed to a stop and everyone hopped out.
"What's up?" Dewey asked, walking over to Lawrence and Freddy. Lawrence turned his ear up and Freddy made sure his nose was visible. Dewey bit his lip.
"This is worse than I thought. Spill the story, NOW." He ordered.
"Well, I dared Lawrence do sdick a pencil in his ear..."
"And I only would do it if he stuck a raisin up his nose...
"And den da eraser got sduck in his ear..."
"And the raisin expanded in his nose." The duo finished. Dewey smiled.
"Hey- cool! I always wondered what would happen if you stuck a raisin up your nose..." Dewey was interrupted by Summer.
"That's not important! How do we get them out?!" She cried.
"Should we call a hospital and ask or something?" Tomika offered her cell phone.
"Sure. Hang on you guys..." Dewey punched in numbers and the group was silent. "Yeah, well, we got an eraser stuck in one kid's ear and a raisin, or a grape by now, stuck up in another's nose... Uh-huh... So that would mean?... What?!... No way... sighs Okay... Yes, we'll be in as quick as we can... bye..." He hung up- but not before slapping both Freddy and Lawrence over the heads.
"You two bimbos! You two have to have the raisin surgically removed now you idiots!" He shouted. Uh-oh, thought Lawrence... this sucks...
"Does that mean we have to miss the show?!" Katie cried out. Dewey nodded solemnly as the band's mouths dropped. No way, Lawrence thought! Ugh! This is all my fault!
"Nice going, Spazzy!" Alicia yelled at Freddy who could only shrug weakly.
"I'm sure we'll all laugh on this years from now, drust me you guys..." Freddy tried to lighten up the cowering group.
"We'll have to see if you live that long first, Freddy Jones!!" Katie threatened as the band piled in the limo, on the way to get to the hospital.
Lawrence tried to consulate the group and said, "Katie; would this be a good time to tell you that we got new muffins?" She glared back at him.
"First lesson in life, kids. Never- I mean never- stick anything up your nose or ear..." Dewey's voice growled through the speaker. Everyone ignored him and gazed out the window again.
Cow... corn field... cow in a corn field... squirrel by a cow in a corn field... a pencil factory... corn field... cows... vineyard... corn field... cows...