Chapter 9

Still waters run deep

Duo POV:

We arrived back after darkness had settled in, the last red scars of the sunset blistering the sky. The apartment blocks looked like giant monoliths standing protruding from the earth, huge and opposing. Their solid darkness was almost intangible in a strange way, like they were cut outs against the skyline. It almost seemed like they weren't there, that if you put your hand out to touch them that it would slip through into nothingness. Speckled with lights from un-curtained windows, you could almost imagine they were huge gaping holes into space and the lights were stars…can you tell that I miss space? Right, course you can. Me, Duo Maxwell, space rat born and bred!

I was glad to finally be home though; in fact I was glad to finally have a place to call home. I mean it's not like I don't appreciate my friends letting me stay with them, heck I'm more than grateful for their kindness…but there's something to be said for a home of your own. I mean, you can only hop, skip and jump around the universe for so long before you start to feel far too unsettled for your own good. I guess you're wondering how I could live as a Gundam pilot, never having a real home other than Deathscythe's cockpit. Truth is…I couldn't. It was hell, and it really grated on me every time I had to uproot and find another place to stay. Yet I didn't let it interfere with my duty, I had more important things to think about…we all did.

"You have the keys Duo," Heero's voice pulled me from my reverie and I nodded absently.

"Oh, yeah," I fumbled in my pocket until I felt the cold jagged metal brush my fingers, "guess I'll have to go into town and get another set cut for you."

"I can do it," he told me shaking his head, and if it had been anyone except Heero Yuy I could have believed that he was being polite.

"Whatever you say He-man," I said back as I struggled with the keys in the door, grinning and hoping he wouldn't notice.

Instead he just blinked at me, not obviously perturbed by the little pet name I had just used, but still a little (dare I say it) shocked. Then he noticed that my hand was squirming behind my back like a snake caught in a toaster as I struggled with the lock…and he laughed. Now when Heero laughs, usually my first instinct is to hit the deck. Why you ask? Well it's because when Heero laughs it usually either means that something has just blown up or he's about to deck you. So I tensed when he stopped laughing and moved towards me, tensed when he let his hands slip from his, correction my trouser pockets to reach out for me. I waited for the blow to come, not even bothering to dodge it because I knew he was faster than me anyway.

But it never came. And what did happen made my body go into more shock than if it had been hit.

Unconsciously I had closed my eyes as I waited for the blow, but when I felt a hand slip over my own they went as wide as dinner plates. Then I was staring into deep blue oceans that travelled on to the end of time, like a deep blue night filled with stars and a sunny day all in one. That was the best way I had to describe Heero's eyes, and I don't think I've done too bad a job myself. Heero was not in inch from my face, his body nearly pressed right up against my own so he could reach past me to take hold of my hand that was opening the lock. My heart suddenly began to beat double time, my breath hitched, I could feel a blush rushing to my cheeks.

-Ohmygodohmygodohmygod,- was pretty much all I could think.

What the hell was this? Huh? Huh!? Well come on! In all the time I've known him Heero has never even looked at me sideways in a way that would even remotely suggest that he would rather get within an inch of me voluntarily than kiss a toilet seat. In fact I remembered that he had this kind of aversion to being touched in general, always jittery if you invaded his distorted sense of personal space. If you did actually touch him without his permission then you were generally on the right road to Fistville. Yet here he was, staring seductively into my eyes and practically jumping me on the balcony…okay so not quite seducing or jumping but I'm allowed to get carried away!

"You need to turn it slowly," his voice sounded thick and odd over the loud thumping of my heart in my chest, "or you'll jam it in the lock."

I couldn't even breathe as he decided that he had to just lean that little bit further forward to get a better grasp on my paralyzed hand to turn it and open the lock with a loud click. I could feel his breath against my mouth; I could feel his skin sliding over mine as he moved his hand but didn't step back. Then suddenly, just as if nothing had happened, he was walking past me and into the apartment. I was frozen for a minute, just staring out into the darkness of the night that had opened up before me in Heero's absence. I remembered to breathe just before I would have passed out, sucking in a deep lungful of air and gasping pathetically as I clutched at my chest. I think my heart was doing the samba, or maybe it was more of a rumba? I had to hold onto the rail that ran along the balcony just to make sure I didn't fall over from dizziness. I know what you're thinking, so you just don't have to say anything. I'm pathetic I know, but it just came so out of the blue!

"Are you going to stand out there all night?"

I turned to see Heero standing in the doorway, his jacket off and a slight frown on his brow as he eyed me. This didn't help in anyway, him raking his eyes up and down my body. In fact my heart began to do some sort of cardiovascular dance that I'm sure is akin to a heart attack. Okay so it wasn't that bad, but hell! The guy was driving me crazy! Yet all I could do was wheeze like an idiot and nod weakly, making sure not to touch him as I ran into the apartment.

-Oh you bastard! Oh you little swine!- I panted as I ran into the bathroom; yeah I know, I was acting like a fourteen year old girl with a crush, running into the bathroom, gees what a cliché!

He had to know he was doing; that was all I could reason as I locked the door and slid down it onto the rough carpet. I lay my head back and tried not to die of embarrassment right there and then. How the hell was I ever going to explain this one? Running into the bathroom? Blushing like a fool and having heart attacks just because he leaned at me? Aww dammit!!!

"Duo," I started terribly at the muffled sound of his voice through the bathroom door and cursed under my breath, "are you in there?"

"Eh…yeah, umm," I said trying to stall him, "why?"

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah."

"Oh."

"…Something you wanted?" I asked stupidly.

"…Iie."

Then all I could hear was the soft padding of his feet as he retreated from the door. I sighed in relief and cursed again just for good measure. Rising from the floor I stumbled over to the sink to splash my face with cold water and get myself in order.

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Heero POV:

-What the hell am I thinking? No really I'm serious! I mean…what the hell am I thinking!? I have never, NEVER even thought…not even once…I mean Duo…he's a comrade, a complete baka…a man! I must be going crazy or something, I really must.-

I just tried my best to ignore my maddening thoughts as I hung up my coat. Duo had run past me so fast I hardly saw him move! Well, I guess I can't blame him, I was acting…strangely. I don't know what came over me, I really don't and it was so unlike me. Could I attribute this to the new dark side of my personality as well? I wasn't sure if I could…

"So what are we doing for dinner?" Duo's bright cheerful voice that had been severely hyperventilating not two minutes earlier chirruped behind me.

"I'll cook," I said back in my best monotone.

"You'll cook huh?" his voice held a smirking tone, yet I could detect the slight waver in it, probably due to my seeming calm at the situation, "should I be worried?"

"Only if you don't shut up," I glared at him as I reached for the coat peg and hung up my shiny new Preventers Jacket.

"Right, right "Duo's a baka" I know," he said rolling his eyes and waving his hand nonchalantly as he stalked off towards the meagre kitchen.

"Hn," was all I could muster in the face of such acceptance.

I just wouldn't think about it. That would do it, then I wouldn't have to even register that the event had taken place. I could just shrug it off, nice and simple.

-What? Simple to shrug off just like everything else you've done?-

-Oh god…no, what are you doing here!?- I almost couldn't be sure if I said it out loud or not, backing up against the hallway wall more out of instinct than real danger.

-Who me? I'm always here you know that…tut tut Heero, I would have thought that you would be more careful with your friends, but your just as incompetent in that area as you are in everything else,- the Darkness sneered as it wove through my thoughts, making me feel dizzy and slightly nauseous.

-Shut up, shut up you don't know anything!- I couldn't help but retaliate, feeling anger rise in my mind as the others presence grew stronger and stronger.

-Oh but I think I do. I am you, never forget that. I was released and now I can never be put back in my cage. I think you know that better than anyone. You've tried hard enough to shut me out.-

-I don't need to listen to you,- I said back, blinking as spots began to dance mesmerising in front of my eyes and my knees began to give way under the onslaught, -I don't…-

-I bet you don't. I'm what kept us alive these past two years, don't you forget that.-

-No, no I was just…-

-Be quiet.-

-No…-

-Wake up.-

-…I don't want to wake up-

-Heero, hey buddy come one!- at that sudden change of tone my eyes snapped open.

I was on the floor, crumpled haphazardly against the wall with Duo crouched down beside me. His eyes were big and sparkling with concern and curiosity. I felt my mind settling back down, just as the blush began to rise in my cheeks. His hand was resting worriedly on my face and I shied from the contact, shied from the warm feeling…even though all instinct told me to lean into that warmth and let it help drive the darkness back. I shook off these thoughts as soon as they appeared and tried to avoid his eyes

"Are you okay?" he asked timidly, retracting his hand, "you just seemed to black out there. What the hell was that about?"

"Nothing," I said flatly, pushing up against the wall to steady myself as I stood, "I'm just tired."

"Yeah right Heero!" he said defensively, getting all motherly like he used to do during the war, "I don't buy it, what's the matter?"

"Then don't buy it," I shrugged, finally in control of myself once more and damned if I wasn't going to convince Duo of the fact.

"…Heero," he said crossing his arms, his eyes softening.

"I haven't eaten all day and I've been working on that case for five hours solid and then the long drive home," I don't think I'd said this much in one go since I got here, but at least it would shut the braided baka up, "I'm just tired and hungry and I want to make dinner."
"Like hell you're making dinner after that little stunt!" Duo scoffed, taking hold of my arm and steering me into the living room.

I was amazed that he could recover so quickly from the embarrassment I was sure I had seen him suffering from before. He was just holding onto my arm and guiding me as if I hadn't just come on to him five minutes before. I guess his concern just overrode his own need for space, but then Duo was like that. He didn't much care for politics or governmental affairs, but he liked to help his friends and those he felt were being oppressed or bullied. Now don't get me wrong, it isn't like he's too unintelligent to understand politics, the man isn't stupid. I know I call him baka enough to almost have him answering to it, but he is clever and sharp. He understands politics, well to be a Gundam pilot you had to understand politics just to know what you were fighting for, but it just doesn't hold any interest for him. He's more of a one on one people kind of person. I guess that's why he joined as an agent for the Preventers, he's just that sort of guy.

"Really Duo, I'm fine," I said softly, shaking off his grip and taking a step away from him.

He eyed me suspiciously before folding his arms, yet not quite so securely that he couldn't catch me if I fell again. Yet I was steady now, I was fine, I was fine. I was. Yet the way he was looking at me, I didn't want it. I didn't want his sympathy or his care, I just wanted to be left…alone. I stuffed my stupid contradictory thoughts to the back of mind into a dark corner where they hopefully wouldn't bother me.

"I'll make dinner," I said again, much more confidently and in my best don't-fuck-with-me tone.

He visibly bristled at this, his concerned gaze becoming more a glare to rival my own. His arms unwound but he narrowed his eyes and looked at me in annoyance.

"Alright, alright!" Duo said holding up his hands in a placating gesture and sighing irritably through his nose, "sorry for caring! Make dinner, fall asleep in the oven and gas yourself see if I care."

"Duo…" it took a lot to get Duo Maxwell angry yet I seemed to have succeeded in some way.

"Look, just don't think…" he started, closed his mouth, opened it, "…just cause I…" closed it again, snorted and then left the room with a scowl.

I just stood there and blinked in his absence. What on Earth was that all about? What had I done now? What was going on tonight? I was very nonplussed, yet I didn't feel that following Duo and pestering him about it was the best course of action to take. I'd never seen him so irritable before. Was it me? Was it because I…did he not like me…like that?

-Gods, what am I thinking!? I'm not even sure if I like him like that! Yet…maybe I should just try and keep myself in check a little more, no more of this flirting business. I'm too inexperienced as it is anyway to know what I'm doing.-

I'd probably offended him without knowing it, and now he'd be angry at me for the rest of the night, and it was all my fault.

Everything's always my fault.

I just sighed at the thought and let my shoulders slump. I really shouldn't be dwelling on these issues, their too depressing. I just needed to make dinner, eat then go to sleep. I had a mission the next day and I needed to be alert. I needed to be alert so that I could control myself and protect my team mate. I really didn't need anything crazy happening while out on a mission, that would just blow everything I had worked for.

-Just make dinner Heero, - I thought to myself as I padded off towards the tiny kitchen, -make dinner and keep your mouth shut.-

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Duo POV

Oh god. I'm going crazy, that's what it is isn't it. What the hell's going on tonight? I can't just control myself? Obviously not! I had just blown up at Heero, I mean Heero of all people! And why? Just because he was a little short with me…like he's never done that before! Well, maybe that was why I blew up at him then, because I thought he had changed. But his tone of voice, that glare back there, it was all trademark Heero Yuy, showing me he is still just like he's always been. I was an idiot to think he had changed at all, and idiot, a complete baka!

"I just need to calm down," I murmured to myself as I stood in my little bedroom and listened absently to the sizzling sounds drifting from the kitchen, "just need to de-stress myself."

I took a deep breath, holding it in my lungs before slowly letting it out through my nose. I sat down on the creaky mattress and sighed a little forlornly. Heero had been so open lately, so talkative (well for Heero it was talkative), and then he had just slipped back into his old routine so easily. It just…made me mad! I couldn't help it; I guess I've been a little stressed lately…so I blew up at him. Great. Now he'd probably not speak to me for weeks, how much fun that would be.

-I'm such an idiot.- was the only thought in my head, other than a vague wondering at what Heero was making…and whether he was putting poison in my portion.

AN: Ahhh! I just couldn't stop writing! I've even got more fun penned out for this night in the Maxwell/Yuy household, but I thought I'd save it for next chapter. More angst filled dinners up next! Please R&R!

Ps: Oh yeah, to Shaodws of Grey…keep the crazy reviews coming! Their my favourite kind ^-^ !