Things Dumbledore Never Told Harry and Some Other Stupid Things with Harry Potter

Hello, this is my second fanfic. Please be nice, it took me forever to think of an idea.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, but I wish I did. 

"Harry," Dumbledore says sternly, "you are a girl!!!!" Harry screams and runs out of the office, then he thinks 'No wonder I have been having feelings for Malfoy and Ron.'

"Harry," Dumbledore says, "I am your father!!!!" Harry screams then faints. Then Dumbledore speaks again and says, "Naw, I'm just kidding, Voldemort is your real father." Harry gets up screams again then he faints again.

"Harry, I'm so sorry to tell you this, but there is an evil guy named Voldemort that is out to get you." "Well, DUH," says Harry. "Everyone knows that!!" "Oh ok Harry, lemon drop?"

"Harry, do you want a lemon drop?" "No" "Aw come on Harry, I know you want one!!!"

"I said NO; now get away from me you crazy old man." "You sure?" "Ugh!!" says Harry, and then he thinks to himself, 'If I take one he'll leave alone.' "Fine, I'll take one." Dumbledore smiles, gives him one, and walks away. "Finally, he's gone!!! I think he will leave me alone now." Dumbledore walks up to Harry to ask him another question but Harry is quick and curses Dumbledore so he can be left alone.

"Harry, did you know that, I AM BATMAN!!!" "That's nice Professor Dumbledore."

(This is Cho Chang and Harry talking)

"Hi hi!!" "Oh my gosh!!" says Harry. "Cho why are you talking like a hillbilly? You even look like a hillbilly to. "Well...you sees I'ves been a hillbilly all my life buts you never see it." "Oh, Cho I have to go. See ya!!!" Harry runs as fast as he can away from Cho because he is afraid of hillbillies.

Harry is sitting in his happy place right now because something terrible just happened.

Flash back: Harry was sitting at his usual table in the library when suddenly Draco Malfoy popped out behind a book cover. Do you know what he was wearing? He was wearing a pink frilly tutu singing disgusting Brittany Spears music. After what Harry saw he was scarred for life and will never EVER look at Draco Malfoy again after what he saw.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - That's all for now. Tanks for reading everybody!! Please review!!

McCall

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