Disclaimer: I do not know why I'd want the X-Men, Jean and Scott are part
of that team. But if Marvel would like to sell individuals I'd take Remy
and Rogue in a heartbeat!
CHAPTER 4
Interrupted misery
I sat there being surrounded by my miserable thoughts. My head throbbed. My stomach churned bile, sloshing from one side of my belly to the other. And the worse pain I've felt, well since last night, was the ache in my heart. I don't know why that I should even have an ache and let alone in my heart, but I did, and I didn't know why? I mean come on I dealt with my issues didn't I? Then why did these tears come after I saw Gambit and Belladonna together? 'Because you're not totally over him choosing her over you.' A little voice popped into my head said. Whoever they were they were right.
I wasn't completely over the fact that as much as, I never wanted to admit it, Gambit chose Bella over me. And it stung. He seemed like he felt genuine feelings, but maybe I was reading too much into the way he looked at me, I don't know, I probably looked like a nice piece of ass. Or a challenge. More of that one, well, 'cause he couldn't touch me then, I was mostly likely a challenge to him, although I don't want to admit that either. I'm in denial, it seems eh? Everyone's got their quirks.
But.......I was just being stupid. Of course he felt nothing for me. If he did would he cheated on me with that.....whore? Or slut? I don't know they both sound good to me. Isn't it a proven fact that if you love someone, you would do absolutely nothing to hurt them? Guess he didn't love me after all. Although the stares......no. He didn't. He was just playing mind games like all guys do to women, particularly that man.
Alright, to interrupt my depressing thoughts, my spidey sense was tingling. That was just wrong but something similar was happening to me. That person who was previously mentioned was still there. My nerves felt as though they were being scratched at with cat claws, or Wolverine's; either one would do. My hair on the back of my neck was pricked upwards and I kept shuddering, not from the cold. It wasn't even cold out. It was warm, sunny, and clear as Jean's perfect skin. Excuse the wise-cracks, but it's something I do, if you couldn't tell by now. But back to the subject......er......problem at hand. There was some weirdo person watching me.
Hopefully it wasn't anyone from the mansion. If they ever laid eyes on how horrible I looked right now, they wouldn't live to see their birthdays. I didn't need a mirror to tell me how bad I looked. Besides my mirror always seemed to lie to me. I have bad luck with those sort of things. A few years back, Ray found out how bad it was to walk in on me when I was one: in a bad mood or two: crying. He's done both. I think he was looking for Tabby. Because they oh so don't like each other. Yeah. Sure. Moving on. What always got me, why did he come to me? Ever since the whole 'girl power' phase in our lives, they think I'll want to socialize with her. Wait they think I actually want to socialize. They don't know me all that well and I lived here for how long?
But I digress, back to the person watching me like I was a babbling brook. Or a falling waterfall.......that fits better I guess. I am crying at a very rapid speed, and I can't stop it. It's freely falling tears that are driven by the pull of gravity. That was a whole truck full of science mumbo-jumbo. I should get Hank to describe a waterfall to me. See how close I really was to describing it. Whoa I'm getting off topic a little too much for my own being. The person made no attempt to move, or at the very least breathe. Well I hope they were breathing otherwise we would have to have a serious talk later.
I wiped away a few stray tears that decided to make their own paths down the back side of my neck and instead of down the front of my chin. It tickled okay? My face was drenched. I did nothing to stop it, or dry it. I couldn't with the many thoughts enclosing my already packed brain. 'what did the professor mean? Could he get any more pod people like? Does Logan know what happened? Oh god does Ororo or Hank? And Kitty or Kurt even?' You have to think about the Kurt comment. I don't think Gambit would still be alive or in this dimension if Kurt knew what he did. He has always been the protective little brother. Make ya' feel infuriated to other people don't it?
Shuffling of feet got my attention. The person made a walking attempt to me. It was slow movements, graceful movements. They seemed to be carried away with the wind and just as light. The footsteps stopped a few feet away from me, let's say four and it became as quiet as the calm before the storm. Makes ya' wonder. For example who the hell is this person being a stalker to me? Are they friend or foe? Will Kitty ever become un-hyper? Okay maybe not the last question, that was just random. I was intent on listening to the person's breathing, that I didn't notice my own breaths coming out irregularly. The breathing got closer and closer until it was right by my ear and a very deep and smooth voiced asked:
"It's okay Chere it's just me." Well.......that made me jump as high as the stars. Know the expression, 'reach for the stars'? I think I might have done so. I spun around to glare at the dog behind red, tear filled eyes. My mascara had ran down my cheeks, my hands were purple from wiping my eyes. The deep shade of purple eyeshadow was mixed with the streaks running down my face. I looked horrible. That worked to my advantage. I anticipated that my facial expressions would seem menacing than usual. Maybe.........maybe not.
"Now why do you look at Remy in that way?" he tried to smile but something held him back, before her could look fully happy. There was a darker side to this smile that he preferred not to show me at that time. Whatever I was already pissed because, of him, I was crying. That alone called for trouble. I was still glaring, trying to get him to notice that I wanted to be by myself. That didn't work. I sighed loudly and he still didn't take the hint.
"Listen Cajun...........leave now." I said in a low stern deadly voice. I pointed to the roof-top door, and he followed my finger to the door, but he just shrugged and looked at me with a ....look. It showed mischief but also a sort of fear. Sorrow maybe too? I'm not empathic, that's Gambit. I can't tell others are feeling, so I try and guess. Sorry if it comes out wrong, I have a slim to none chance with this thing.
"I don't feel much like leaving, Rogue. But we need to talk." he took out his bo staff and leaned on it. He gave me a haughty look, that sent fear goose bumps through me. But why should I be scared? That's not how I feel. Betrayed, angry, and the saying 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorn' comes to mind to describe me but scared? Never!
"No we don'. Ya' need t'mosey on down that there tile walk way an' leave meh the HELL ALONE!" I started to raise my voice at him. Couldn't you tell? I was aggravated and upset which was a far more dangerous combination, then dying and going to hell was. His face didn't express a change in the way he was thinking or feeling. He wouldn't give that away with a friggin' poker-face he had going.
"Oui Chere we do. We need to talk about some things that concerning you, me, and Bell." God I didn't want this talk right now. I didn't want to hear him say how wrong it was for him and me to be together, or how badly he had missed Belladonna, and just needed her 'company' that night. I couldn't bare to listen to this nonsense. I turned from looking at him and held my head. The pressure of my emotions was starting to get to me. I was going to lose control over my absorbed powers, and I needed to relax or otherwise KA-BLEWY!
"Gambit get outta here now..........please" I whispered the 'please' while the other words were shouted. My sanity was going to leave me at any moment, because my emotions just don't like to take a no for an answer. They were so heavy and constricting to me. I wanted to be free........a loud thunder rolled in the air. Oh shit! Did I just do that? I'm going to lose control over Storm's powers any time now, and he's still standing there, waiting. Waiting for me to collect my thoughts, and to shut up and to listen, but I won't.
"Rogue I know it's you with the whole weather deal going on now. Take a breath and right yourself before we get into discussing somethings." No I won't calm myself so you can fill my head with so much crap it will fall over. 'But I need to calm down. Breath. Nice and slow. In out. In out. Just relax.' My hands fell from my head and my emotions were re-covered and buried down deep within my being. It hurt to repress them but it hurt more to unleash them.
"Fine, Ah'm all good t'go. Speakin' t'go, why don' ya' go an' leave?" I asked in a sarcastic tome of voice. I turned back to him only now he was closer. He probably came to see if he would jump or not. It'd make things easier for him. I'll bet.
"Stop trying to get rid of me Rogue. We have to talk.......now. We can't just keep going on without ever expressing certain things to one or another." He stood up straight, as if that'll make me change my mind. As if! I couldn't change my mind unless I wanted to. And right now I didn't. Once I put my head to something or make up a decision there's no going back.
"Stop tryin' forgive meh, Ah wasn' tryin' ah was tellin'. GET OUTTA HERE! I don' wanta listen t'your candy ass excuses. That's all ya' ever had an' that's all ya'll ever have. You can' stay wit' one girl, on accounts of this or that! SO JUST TELL MEH T'MY FACE, WHY YA' DIDN' WANT MEH AND SLEPT WIT' Belladonna." I was panting now. That rage was gonna take over me right soon. I swallowed my sadness and self pity but the anger sneaked out of there somehow. A crash of thunder again sounded, and a lightening took shape in the skies. 'Oh no' I was causing some big ass storm and the real Storm was going to have my head. Or Gambit's. That one would suit me just fine. And it would be hilarious in my opinion.
"That's what we have to talk about Rogue! I never slept with Bella on my own terms!" 'What the hell is he saying?' Okay lost the emotionally burden girl very fast and it wasn't pretty. What did he mean? There is no such thing as to not to not having a choice to make love with someone else. Either you want to or you don't. It's that, not this border line crap he was dishing to me. You can't be in-between when it comes to love.
"Neva slept wit' Bella on your own terms huh? Well w'at terms would those be Gambit? Ya' were lonely and needed a friend or ya' just took w'at ya' could get at that tyme?" A violent storm started up now. I tried to keep it under wraps but I couldn't. It's comings were just as uncontrollable as a tornado's uprising. His face dropped slightly, but he tried to keep his poker-face although I was wearing him down to a pulp.
"Non that's not the reason. Ya' know Bell's power right?" He was trying to explain this to me. He had a tone that was used for teaching a baby how to pick something up or how to speak. Did I look like I had speech impairment problems? No I didn't think so. The wind whipped and howled and made Gambit take a step back form me. Good. Finally some space from him. About time. The rain swirled around my head and sped out into different directions. The sky was dark, gloomy, and any small voice could call down a destructive force upon there head. That's a kind a message you want to send an enemy.
"W'at 'bout it? She can hypnotize anyone by lookin' straight into their eyes. W'at's your point Cajun?" I talked in a even tone. I didn't yell or scream. I talked to him like he deserved the time of day. But I would disagree full heartedly to the statement. He gave me a faint smile and I stood my ground, clenching my fists at my sides, just incase. He moved closer to me, until he was no more than six inches away from me. I glared at him. He might think this works with all the girls, but not me. I was so thankful for what came next. Logan, Storm, and Kitty appeared from the roof-top door. I had to withhold the urge to kiss Logan's feet, it was a sight for sore eyes. But Remy paid no attention when he spoke in a loud clear voice above the racket that was my feelings, manifested into the killer storm overhead.
"She hypnotized me into sleeping with her!"He yelled it to me but it sounded like a whisper. The storm picked up speed. I was so mad! How could she do such a thing? How could he let her? How could I even trust them together in the same house? I looked over his shoulders to see that Ororo's mouth dropped open, Kitty gasped and Logan ...... lets say he didn't look to happy. He was stone cold solid and his face said it all. He was pissed!
"An' your mental powers were no match ryght? Or is this ano'her excuse? Ah'm mean c'mon Cajun your known for 'em around this household!" I screamed back at him. The call of this earth responded to me and hail stones hit their target. Gambit. It cut and scraped his face and cut his hands that were shown from his fingerless gloves. He stepped back and Logan arched upwards ready to strike if given the chance. He looked like a cat ready to pounce on a mouse.
"Rogue I would never lie about this sort of thing!"
"Well if ya' knew then why didn' ya' come an' tell meh then hmmm?"-I gestured over to Kitty for my next comment.......rant whatever-"Kitty had my address we sent mail back an' forth. Ya' coulda went an' got it an' told meh what really happened. Or called. Or hell even come and see meh! There's a whole lot o'ways ya' could have told meh this you no good, cheating, lying Cajun!" I shrieked on top of my lungs. The weather beckoned to my calls and the fury intensified. The rain poured, the wind swept everyone's hair with so much force, and the lightening was shown more and more often, with so much booming of thunder, that would frighten Magneto.
"Because I myself didn't know until after you left!" He put his arms over his face to block the winds coming from my direction to him. The hail was still there but wasn't as hard as when it first appeared. The rain was harder and the wind......was like a F2 twister. It was strong and powerful and powered by my hate and anger. Logan put an arm over his head to see us and Kitty clung to Ororo who had made a little umbrella out of the clouds to hold back the water for the both of them. Logan probably wanted to be tough and stick it out in the storm with me and Gambit, although Gambit was getting the worst of it. Ha ha.
"How does that one work out for ya'? You happened t'repress those awful memories of that fuckin' nyght and when Ah left it broke the hold on 'em an' now ya' can rememba?" I had so much sarcasm in my voice that it was a little freaky. But it masked my real hurt. This man hurt me so badly it ripped on my heart. It was like strings were attached to my heart and every time I saw him, felt his presence, remembered him, they were pulled and it didn't feel too good. At least the storm was taking some of my force to beat him silly.
"Rogue it's not like that either-."
"Then w'at exactly?" Remy's face grew darker than before and it was like he was ashamed of what he had to say next. About time he feels that way for his mis-deeds.
"Bell erased my thoughts of that night so that I couldn't remember it. She hypnotized me into sleeping with her then she hypnotized me into forgetting!" He was yelling and pleading at the same time. His one arm hung down by his side, his other arm blocked some wind so he could see me and his bo staff laid on the tiled roof next to his side. He looked ragged and tried like he had just came back from fighting a battle. 'An internal battle.' I corrected myself. The pain must've been from his mind and heart battling for only one to make sense to him.
"Bella actually made ya' forget?"-I had an awe sounding tone to my voice. It was to disguise my true intentions. He nodded.-"Then maybe she can do the same for meh!" I screamed over the crack of thunder. The storm outside had resulted in an avenging rain-storm. It poured cats and dogs. And it looked like it wasn't going to be letting up any time soon like my own tears that were now re-appearing.
"You don't mean that chere." His voice was heavy with hurt. Again about time. I didn't care if I broke his heart. He already did that to mine. The thief himself was so good at stealing and wooing women's hearts, that he forgot something about mine. It as already too fragile for the bumpy ride that was Remy LeBeau.
"THE HELL AH DON'! You played meh! You took my heart, wouldn' give it back, an' then ya' go an' break it! You neva cared or loved meh! Ah was a game, a challenge, someone who got your curiosity goin'!"-I started to sob and from where I could see everyone had hurtful expressions on. Kitty looked ready to cry, Ororo gulped a few times to keep back the tears and Logan had a sorrow filled expression just for me. No pity but he knew what I was feeling and it showed. Gambit......his face was soaked from the rain and his eyes burned into mine as he realized what he did and what I was saying-"Ah neva wanta see ya' again Cajun! This apology means nothin' t'meh!" I stopped crying abruptly and knew what I was doing. I was crying in front of everyone. That isn't something you see everyday. Hell they never see it.
And the one person who had made me cry was Gambit himself. The flood gate's valve was broken and the tears were flying when I spoke to him. If I wasn't talking with him then maybe I wouldn't of been sobbing like poor orphan Annie! I had, had it with his mind games and his stupid ideas, thoughts, and his friggin' feelings up to here! I stepped forward to him and he didn't move. He stood still. I took my opportunity and punched him good and hard in the jaw, with a right hook. He stumbled back and already a huge red spot had taken place there. That mixed with the bloody, maybe broken nose made him look terrible. A giant sized hail stone had hit him right on the bridge of his nose and now it had a huge gash on it. And then there was the discussion of the tiny cuts that bleed all over his face. I did a lot of damage for someone who doesn't do a lot to the person. I stepped back from him and looked at him with the most utter disgust and ran to the stairs.
Once I reached inside the roof-top threshold, I gulped down air. I hadn't breathed since I had screamed at him, which felt awesome. I leaned against the wall, just breathing. No thoughts entered my brain or head for that matter at this time, it was just empty, like how I felt. No emotions. Nothing. The rain outside and the weather went back to how it was suppose to be. Warm, bright, and cheery. 'Too bad the weather can't change me like I can to it.' Hey! I had a thought. Yes it was depressing and sullen but still........it was a thought. Then my hearing picked up on the conversation on the roof. Thank you Wolverine!
"You slept with Belladonna? What in like God's name got into your testosterone filled head to make you do something so horrible to Rogue? And you want her to forgive you? You bastard!" Yup that was Kitty. If I hadn't caught that 'like' in there, I wouldn't of guessed her for the world. She swears? Since when? 'Prolly Logan's influence.' I stifled a laugh. It felt good to be happy even if it was only for a moment. But I guess I am becoming more and more like Kitty. I just had an emotional roller coaster ride. From sad to angry to happy in less than one hour. Different.
"It wasn't my doing Kit-Cat! You were up here. Ya'' heard what I said happened, so don't just go blaming me for everything. I feel low enough as it is!" Remy somewhat yelled, defended himself and pleaded with the others. I heard Logan snort and Ororo sigh. They didn't like the way this turned out at all I take it. Then there was shuffling of feet.
"Listen bub. I won't go into any details here because half-pint is here but go so much as two feet close to Rogue, and your 'family jewels' will be placed in a jar on my dresser in my room. Got it?" He picked him up by his collar. He had to, only that tone of voice was for aiming threats, which he usually kept, but that tone was reserved for picking people up by their shirts and strangling them. Logan I could tell was extremely pissed at what he heard come out of the Cajun's mouth, just then.
"Logan put him down!"- Or you could just wait to listen to the whole conversation and wait for the answer to bite you in the ass, like that so did-"Now Remy how did you find out after Rogue left the mansion?" Hey that's a good question. I was too upset to remember that from the painful conversation. Go Ororo!
"I talked with Cyke and Jeannie a few days after Rogue left and Scott all but bit my head off when I brought up the subject, so I turned to Jean and she ave me hints as to what I was missing. Pretty soon I was banging on the Prof's door to get him to read my mind. Jean provided visuals from Rogue's mind." I heard a 'plop' and I figured he'd sat down hard. Small footsteps followed him, pacing because they would get close then go far away. Back and forth. Back and forth. That was irritating.
"Where did Jean get the images? Rogue's mind? Then that would mean she walked in on you and ..........GROSS!" I smiled. Kitty could always bring a mature point of view to talkative subjects. Even hurtful ones. Got to love her innocence.
"Yeah tell me about it. God I feel horrible."
"Well ya' should..." Logan tried but failed in attempt. Storm cut him off.
"Did Jean read Rogue's mind to get the information?"
"Oui Stormy, that she did."
"That like explains that back then how cruel they were treating you. Which now I totally agree with." There was another snort, probably Logan again.
"What should we do now then?" That was Remy. Why did he care so much to know what happened next hm? It didn't make sense. I now know it wasn't his fault but still, as Logan once said to me: 'There's something about betrayal that always sticks with you.' Of course there was more to that long speech he gave me after my powers went crazy but still, that was all I remembered.
"You dear Remy, will go to the med lab and get fixed up. Rogue did a number on you with the hail, punching and your nose doesn't look good either. You need medical attention before you can do anything else today." Ororo spoke with a quiet gentle calm to her voice. I loved that tone. She used it on me quite a few times in the past when my nightmares got the worst of me. It soothed and made me feel stronger to fight the repressed memories of the others. It always gave me strength.
"But about Rogue.........I need to talk to her." I snorted that time. I wasn't going to be left alone with him in any room and I would dodge him endlessly if I had to just so that I wouldn't have to talk again. The last talk made my cry and left Gambit with cuts and bruises.
"Bub she don't want to talk to you. I know Rogue, and right now she needs to be by herself. She doesn't need anymore pressure in her life from you or any of the other X-Men." I could almost see him looking at Kitty directly when he said that. That and the statement following that remark:
"Hey what's that suppose to mean?" Yep I was right. It felt good to be right.
"It means that you or Kurt or anyone else is not to interfere with Remy or Rogue's problems. They are both adults and can handle themselves and their issues together just fine," Storm spoke for Logan. I wonder if he liked that? I went to leave. I just about rounded the corner when the last thing I heard was:
"And if the Cajun goes near Rogue, he won't live long enough to enjoy those cigarettes I saw him buy last night." Always the father figure aren't you Wolverine? Well anyway I walked back to my room, finding it with ease and decided to take a long hot shower to wash away the pain and it bring happiness to me. And maybe later I'd go and chill in my room. It was the one place I knew the Cajun wouldn't be.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AN: And here is the next chapter. Sorry it took so long, but there was a lot to cover, and then, I wrote it on my laptop, but I found out the hard way my computer doesn't like those cd's that you can store information on. It took me two days to re-type it. Sorry again and comment, compliments, and nice helping hints would be great. As always R&R!
Shout out! Whee! I love doing this! *goofy smile*
Q.S: I don't think I've heard that song, but I'm glad my story reminded you of it. Hey I guess I made it a song-fic then huh? Thank you for reviewing, and no Rogue wasn't crying. Would you cry if you felt your ex-boyfriend's pain that you were causing him, and you wanted to? No, so therefore she wasn't either. I know I made her cry here but the burdening emotions got the best of her. Won't happen to soon. Thank ya'!
LAE Meka: Thank you! Your so sweet to keep reviewing this ..... thing. Thank you about the compliment on my writing. I'm sure your good too. You get a sugar cookie, 'cause your sweet!
Carla-P: You like regular updates. Well I can't promise that, as how this wasn't but, I'll try, because you just love them so much. Thanks for the chocolate! I'm addicted to chocolate!
Epona04: Your sweet too! Thank you for the nice comments, and this chapter is for you. Enjoy and you get a Belladonna doll. They didn't seel as good as I thought they would. Go figure? *smiles*
Cate: You want Bella to get her ass kicked huh? I could do that. Not next chapter but maybe the next one. Whoa a lot of people are asking that one huh? Well thanks for the review, and keep reading for that chapter.
SickminderSucker: Yeah Rems does deserve to get beat down, but technically it wasn't his fault, although, I hope this chapter makes up for the beating. I'm sure I'll add more with him getting abused in some way shape or form. Thank you!
Ish: Next chapter, some Romy not a lot. Can't have them make up just yet. And Bella is getting what she deserves trust me. Not soon but she will. Heh heh. *eyes dart* Have a cookie!
Extacy: Regular updates? Don't know, could do but you'll have to talk to my teachers on the homework deal and I'm almost positive another chapter should be up this week. Fingers crossed. Thank you.
~Love and Peace215~
CHAPTER 4
Interrupted misery
I sat there being surrounded by my miserable thoughts. My head throbbed. My stomach churned bile, sloshing from one side of my belly to the other. And the worse pain I've felt, well since last night, was the ache in my heart. I don't know why that I should even have an ache and let alone in my heart, but I did, and I didn't know why? I mean come on I dealt with my issues didn't I? Then why did these tears come after I saw Gambit and Belladonna together? 'Because you're not totally over him choosing her over you.' A little voice popped into my head said. Whoever they were they were right.
I wasn't completely over the fact that as much as, I never wanted to admit it, Gambit chose Bella over me. And it stung. He seemed like he felt genuine feelings, but maybe I was reading too much into the way he looked at me, I don't know, I probably looked like a nice piece of ass. Or a challenge. More of that one, well, 'cause he couldn't touch me then, I was mostly likely a challenge to him, although I don't want to admit that either. I'm in denial, it seems eh? Everyone's got their quirks.
But.......I was just being stupid. Of course he felt nothing for me. If he did would he cheated on me with that.....whore? Or slut? I don't know they both sound good to me. Isn't it a proven fact that if you love someone, you would do absolutely nothing to hurt them? Guess he didn't love me after all. Although the stares......no. He didn't. He was just playing mind games like all guys do to women, particularly that man.
Alright, to interrupt my depressing thoughts, my spidey sense was tingling. That was just wrong but something similar was happening to me. That person who was previously mentioned was still there. My nerves felt as though they were being scratched at with cat claws, or Wolverine's; either one would do. My hair on the back of my neck was pricked upwards and I kept shuddering, not from the cold. It wasn't even cold out. It was warm, sunny, and clear as Jean's perfect skin. Excuse the wise-cracks, but it's something I do, if you couldn't tell by now. But back to the subject......er......problem at hand. There was some weirdo person watching me.
Hopefully it wasn't anyone from the mansion. If they ever laid eyes on how horrible I looked right now, they wouldn't live to see their birthdays. I didn't need a mirror to tell me how bad I looked. Besides my mirror always seemed to lie to me. I have bad luck with those sort of things. A few years back, Ray found out how bad it was to walk in on me when I was one: in a bad mood or two: crying. He's done both. I think he was looking for Tabby. Because they oh so don't like each other. Yeah. Sure. Moving on. What always got me, why did he come to me? Ever since the whole 'girl power' phase in our lives, they think I'll want to socialize with her. Wait they think I actually want to socialize. They don't know me all that well and I lived here for how long?
But I digress, back to the person watching me like I was a babbling brook. Or a falling waterfall.......that fits better I guess. I am crying at a very rapid speed, and I can't stop it. It's freely falling tears that are driven by the pull of gravity. That was a whole truck full of science mumbo-jumbo. I should get Hank to describe a waterfall to me. See how close I really was to describing it. Whoa I'm getting off topic a little too much for my own being. The person made no attempt to move, or at the very least breathe. Well I hope they were breathing otherwise we would have to have a serious talk later.
I wiped away a few stray tears that decided to make their own paths down the back side of my neck and instead of down the front of my chin. It tickled okay? My face was drenched. I did nothing to stop it, or dry it. I couldn't with the many thoughts enclosing my already packed brain. 'what did the professor mean? Could he get any more pod people like? Does Logan know what happened? Oh god does Ororo or Hank? And Kitty or Kurt even?' You have to think about the Kurt comment. I don't think Gambit would still be alive or in this dimension if Kurt knew what he did. He has always been the protective little brother. Make ya' feel infuriated to other people don't it?
Shuffling of feet got my attention. The person made a walking attempt to me. It was slow movements, graceful movements. They seemed to be carried away with the wind and just as light. The footsteps stopped a few feet away from me, let's say four and it became as quiet as the calm before the storm. Makes ya' wonder. For example who the hell is this person being a stalker to me? Are they friend or foe? Will Kitty ever become un-hyper? Okay maybe not the last question, that was just random. I was intent on listening to the person's breathing, that I didn't notice my own breaths coming out irregularly. The breathing got closer and closer until it was right by my ear and a very deep and smooth voiced asked:
"It's okay Chere it's just me." Well.......that made me jump as high as the stars. Know the expression, 'reach for the stars'? I think I might have done so. I spun around to glare at the dog behind red, tear filled eyes. My mascara had ran down my cheeks, my hands were purple from wiping my eyes. The deep shade of purple eyeshadow was mixed with the streaks running down my face. I looked horrible. That worked to my advantage. I anticipated that my facial expressions would seem menacing than usual. Maybe.........maybe not.
"Now why do you look at Remy in that way?" he tried to smile but something held him back, before her could look fully happy. There was a darker side to this smile that he preferred not to show me at that time. Whatever I was already pissed because, of him, I was crying. That alone called for trouble. I was still glaring, trying to get him to notice that I wanted to be by myself. That didn't work. I sighed loudly and he still didn't take the hint.
"Listen Cajun...........leave now." I said in a low stern deadly voice. I pointed to the roof-top door, and he followed my finger to the door, but he just shrugged and looked at me with a ....look. It showed mischief but also a sort of fear. Sorrow maybe too? I'm not empathic, that's Gambit. I can't tell others are feeling, so I try and guess. Sorry if it comes out wrong, I have a slim to none chance with this thing.
"I don't feel much like leaving, Rogue. But we need to talk." he took out his bo staff and leaned on it. He gave me a haughty look, that sent fear goose bumps through me. But why should I be scared? That's not how I feel. Betrayed, angry, and the saying 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorn' comes to mind to describe me but scared? Never!
"No we don'. Ya' need t'mosey on down that there tile walk way an' leave meh the HELL ALONE!" I started to raise my voice at him. Couldn't you tell? I was aggravated and upset which was a far more dangerous combination, then dying and going to hell was. His face didn't express a change in the way he was thinking or feeling. He wouldn't give that away with a friggin' poker-face he had going.
"Oui Chere we do. We need to talk about some things that concerning you, me, and Bell." God I didn't want this talk right now. I didn't want to hear him say how wrong it was for him and me to be together, or how badly he had missed Belladonna, and just needed her 'company' that night. I couldn't bare to listen to this nonsense. I turned from looking at him and held my head. The pressure of my emotions was starting to get to me. I was going to lose control over my absorbed powers, and I needed to relax or otherwise KA-BLEWY!
"Gambit get outta here now..........please" I whispered the 'please' while the other words were shouted. My sanity was going to leave me at any moment, because my emotions just don't like to take a no for an answer. They were so heavy and constricting to me. I wanted to be free........a loud thunder rolled in the air. Oh shit! Did I just do that? I'm going to lose control over Storm's powers any time now, and he's still standing there, waiting. Waiting for me to collect my thoughts, and to shut up and to listen, but I won't.
"Rogue I know it's you with the whole weather deal going on now. Take a breath and right yourself before we get into discussing somethings." No I won't calm myself so you can fill my head with so much crap it will fall over. 'But I need to calm down. Breath. Nice and slow. In out. In out. Just relax.' My hands fell from my head and my emotions were re-covered and buried down deep within my being. It hurt to repress them but it hurt more to unleash them.
"Fine, Ah'm all good t'go. Speakin' t'go, why don' ya' go an' leave?" I asked in a sarcastic tome of voice. I turned back to him only now he was closer. He probably came to see if he would jump or not. It'd make things easier for him. I'll bet.
"Stop trying to get rid of me Rogue. We have to talk.......now. We can't just keep going on without ever expressing certain things to one or another." He stood up straight, as if that'll make me change my mind. As if! I couldn't change my mind unless I wanted to. And right now I didn't. Once I put my head to something or make up a decision there's no going back.
"Stop tryin' forgive meh, Ah wasn' tryin' ah was tellin'. GET OUTTA HERE! I don' wanta listen t'your candy ass excuses. That's all ya' ever had an' that's all ya'll ever have. You can' stay wit' one girl, on accounts of this or that! SO JUST TELL MEH T'MY FACE, WHY YA' DIDN' WANT MEH AND SLEPT WIT' Belladonna." I was panting now. That rage was gonna take over me right soon. I swallowed my sadness and self pity but the anger sneaked out of there somehow. A crash of thunder again sounded, and a lightening took shape in the skies. 'Oh no' I was causing some big ass storm and the real Storm was going to have my head. Or Gambit's. That one would suit me just fine. And it would be hilarious in my opinion.
"That's what we have to talk about Rogue! I never slept with Bella on my own terms!" 'What the hell is he saying?' Okay lost the emotionally burden girl very fast and it wasn't pretty. What did he mean? There is no such thing as to not to not having a choice to make love with someone else. Either you want to or you don't. It's that, not this border line crap he was dishing to me. You can't be in-between when it comes to love.
"Neva slept wit' Bella on your own terms huh? Well w'at terms would those be Gambit? Ya' were lonely and needed a friend or ya' just took w'at ya' could get at that tyme?" A violent storm started up now. I tried to keep it under wraps but I couldn't. It's comings were just as uncontrollable as a tornado's uprising. His face dropped slightly, but he tried to keep his poker-face although I was wearing him down to a pulp.
"Non that's not the reason. Ya' know Bell's power right?" He was trying to explain this to me. He had a tone that was used for teaching a baby how to pick something up or how to speak. Did I look like I had speech impairment problems? No I didn't think so. The wind whipped and howled and made Gambit take a step back form me. Good. Finally some space from him. About time. The rain swirled around my head and sped out into different directions. The sky was dark, gloomy, and any small voice could call down a destructive force upon there head. That's a kind a message you want to send an enemy.
"W'at 'bout it? She can hypnotize anyone by lookin' straight into their eyes. W'at's your point Cajun?" I talked in a even tone. I didn't yell or scream. I talked to him like he deserved the time of day. But I would disagree full heartedly to the statement. He gave me a faint smile and I stood my ground, clenching my fists at my sides, just incase. He moved closer to me, until he was no more than six inches away from me. I glared at him. He might think this works with all the girls, but not me. I was so thankful for what came next. Logan, Storm, and Kitty appeared from the roof-top door. I had to withhold the urge to kiss Logan's feet, it was a sight for sore eyes. But Remy paid no attention when he spoke in a loud clear voice above the racket that was my feelings, manifested into the killer storm overhead.
"She hypnotized me into sleeping with her!"He yelled it to me but it sounded like a whisper. The storm picked up speed. I was so mad! How could she do such a thing? How could he let her? How could I even trust them together in the same house? I looked over his shoulders to see that Ororo's mouth dropped open, Kitty gasped and Logan ...... lets say he didn't look to happy. He was stone cold solid and his face said it all. He was pissed!
"An' your mental powers were no match ryght? Or is this ano'her excuse? Ah'm mean c'mon Cajun your known for 'em around this household!" I screamed back at him. The call of this earth responded to me and hail stones hit their target. Gambit. It cut and scraped his face and cut his hands that were shown from his fingerless gloves. He stepped back and Logan arched upwards ready to strike if given the chance. He looked like a cat ready to pounce on a mouse.
"Rogue I would never lie about this sort of thing!"
"Well if ya' knew then why didn' ya' come an' tell meh then hmmm?"-I gestured over to Kitty for my next comment.......rant whatever-"Kitty had my address we sent mail back an' forth. Ya' coulda went an' got it an' told meh what really happened. Or called. Or hell even come and see meh! There's a whole lot o'ways ya' could have told meh this you no good, cheating, lying Cajun!" I shrieked on top of my lungs. The weather beckoned to my calls and the fury intensified. The rain poured, the wind swept everyone's hair with so much force, and the lightening was shown more and more often, with so much booming of thunder, that would frighten Magneto.
"Because I myself didn't know until after you left!" He put his arms over his face to block the winds coming from my direction to him. The hail was still there but wasn't as hard as when it first appeared. The rain was harder and the wind......was like a F2 twister. It was strong and powerful and powered by my hate and anger. Logan put an arm over his head to see us and Kitty clung to Ororo who had made a little umbrella out of the clouds to hold back the water for the both of them. Logan probably wanted to be tough and stick it out in the storm with me and Gambit, although Gambit was getting the worst of it. Ha ha.
"How does that one work out for ya'? You happened t'repress those awful memories of that fuckin' nyght and when Ah left it broke the hold on 'em an' now ya' can rememba?" I had so much sarcasm in my voice that it was a little freaky. But it masked my real hurt. This man hurt me so badly it ripped on my heart. It was like strings were attached to my heart and every time I saw him, felt his presence, remembered him, they were pulled and it didn't feel too good. At least the storm was taking some of my force to beat him silly.
"Rogue it's not like that either-."
"Then w'at exactly?" Remy's face grew darker than before and it was like he was ashamed of what he had to say next. About time he feels that way for his mis-deeds.
"Bell erased my thoughts of that night so that I couldn't remember it. She hypnotized me into sleeping with her then she hypnotized me into forgetting!" He was yelling and pleading at the same time. His one arm hung down by his side, his other arm blocked some wind so he could see me and his bo staff laid on the tiled roof next to his side. He looked ragged and tried like he had just came back from fighting a battle. 'An internal battle.' I corrected myself. The pain must've been from his mind and heart battling for only one to make sense to him.
"Bella actually made ya' forget?"-I had an awe sounding tone to my voice. It was to disguise my true intentions. He nodded.-"Then maybe she can do the same for meh!" I screamed over the crack of thunder. The storm outside had resulted in an avenging rain-storm. It poured cats and dogs. And it looked like it wasn't going to be letting up any time soon like my own tears that were now re-appearing.
"You don't mean that chere." His voice was heavy with hurt. Again about time. I didn't care if I broke his heart. He already did that to mine. The thief himself was so good at stealing and wooing women's hearts, that he forgot something about mine. It as already too fragile for the bumpy ride that was Remy LeBeau.
"THE HELL AH DON'! You played meh! You took my heart, wouldn' give it back, an' then ya' go an' break it! You neva cared or loved meh! Ah was a game, a challenge, someone who got your curiosity goin'!"-I started to sob and from where I could see everyone had hurtful expressions on. Kitty looked ready to cry, Ororo gulped a few times to keep back the tears and Logan had a sorrow filled expression just for me. No pity but he knew what I was feeling and it showed. Gambit......his face was soaked from the rain and his eyes burned into mine as he realized what he did and what I was saying-"Ah neva wanta see ya' again Cajun! This apology means nothin' t'meh!" I stopped crying abruptly and knew what I was doing. I was crying in front of everyone. That isn't something you see everyday. Hell they never see it.
And the one person who had made me cry was Gambit himself. The flood gate's valve was broken and the tears were flying when I spoke to him. If I wasn't talking with him then maybe I wouldn't of been sobbing like poor orphan Annie! I had, had it with his mind games and his stupid ideas, thoughts, and his friggin' feelings up to here! I stepped forward to him and he didn't move. He stood still. I took my opportunity and punched him good and hard in the jaw, with a right hook. He stumbled back and already a huge red spot had taken place there. That mixed with the bloody, maybe broken nose made him look terrible. A giant sized hail stone had hit him right on the bridge of his nose and now it had a huge gash on it. And then there was the discussion of the tiny cuts that bleed all over his face. I did a lot of damage for someone who doesn't do a lot to the person. I stepped back from him and looked at him with the most utter disgust and ran to the stairs.
Once I reached inside the roof-top threshold, I gulped down air. I hadn't breathed since I had screamed at him, which felt awesome. I leaned against the wall, just breathing. No thoughts entered my brain or head for that matter at this time, it was just empty, like how I felt. No emotions. Nothing. The rain outside and the weather went back to how it was suppose to be. Warm, bright, and cheery. 'Too bad the weather can't change me like I can to it.' Hey! I had a thought. Yes it was depressing and sullen but still........it was a thought. Then my hearing picked up on the conversation on the roof. Thank you Wolverine!
"You slept with Belladonna? What in like God's name got into your testosterone filled head to make you do something so horrible to Rogue? And you want her to forgive you? You bastard!" Yup that was Kitty. If I hadn't caught that 'like' in there, I wouldn't of guessed her for the world. She swears? Since when? 'Prolly Logan's influence.' I stifled a laugh. It felt good to be happy even if it was only for a moment. But I guess I am becoming more and more like Kitty. I just had an emotional roller coaster ride. From sad to angry to happy in less than one hour. Different.
"It wasn't my doing Kit-Cat! You were up here. Ya'' heard what I said happened, so don't just go blaming me for everything. I feel low enough as it is!" Remy somewhat yelled, defended himself and pleaded with the others. I heard Logan snort and Ororo sigh. They didn't like the way this turned out at all I take it. Then there was shuffling of feet.
"Listen bub. I won't go into any details here because half-pint is here but go so much as two feet close to Rogue, and your 'family jewels' will be placed in a jar on my dresser in my room. Got it?" He picked him up by his collar. He had to, only that tone of voice was for aiming threats, which he usually kept, but that tone was reserved for picking people up by their shirts and strangling them. Logan I could tell was extremely pissed at what he heard come out of the Cajun's mouth, just then.
"Logan put him down!"- Or you could just wait to listen to the whole conversation and wait for the answer to bite you in the ass, like that so did-"Now Remy how did you find out after Rogue left the mansion?" Hey that's a good question. I was too upset to remember that from the painful conversation. Go Ororo!
"I talked with Cyke and Jeannie a few days after Rogue left and Scott all but bit my head off when I brought up the subject, so I turned to Jean and she ave me hints as to what I was missing. Pretty soon I was banging on the Prof's door to get him to read my mind. Jean provided visuals from Rogue's mind." I heard a 'plop' and I figured he'd sat down hard. Small footsteps followed him, pacing because they would get close then go far away. Back and forth. Back and forth. That was irritating.
"Where did Jean get the images? Rogue's mind? Then that would mean she walked in on you and ..........GROSS!" I smiled. Kitty could always bring a mature point of view to talkative subjects. Even hurtful ones. Got to love her innocence.
"Yeah tell me about it. God I feel horrible."
"Well ya' should..." Logan tried but failed in attempt. Storm cut him off.
"Did Jean read Rogue's mind to get the information?"
"Oui Stormy, that she did."
"That like explains that back then how cruel they were treating you. Which now I totally agree with." There was another snort, probably Logan again.
"What should we do now then?" That was Remy. Why did he care so much to know what happened next hm? It didn't make sense. I now know it wasn't his fault but still, as Logan once said to me: 'There's something about betrayal that always sticks with you.' Of course there was more to that long speech he gave me after my powers went crazy but still, that was all I remembered.
"You dear Remy, will go to the med lab and get fixed up. Rogue did a number on you with the hail, punching and your nose doesn't look good either. You need medical attention before you can do anything else today." Ororo spoke with a quiet gentle calm to her voice. I loved that tone. She used it on me quite a few times in the past when my nightmares got the worst of me. It soothed and made me feel stronger to fight the repressed memories of the others. It always gave me strength.
"But about Rogue.........I need to talk to her." I snorted that time. I wasn't going to be left alone with him in any room and I would dodge him endlessly if I had to just so that I wouldn't have to talk again. The last talk made my cry and left Gambit with cuts and bruises.
"Bub she don't want to talk to you. I know Rogue, and right now she needs to be by herself. She doesn't need anymore pressure in her life from you or any of the other X-Men." I could almost see him looking at Kitty directly when he said that. That and the statement following that remark:
"Hey what's that suppose to mean?" Yep I was right. It felt good to be right.
"It means that you or Kurt or anyone else is not to interfere with Remy or Rogue's problems. They are both adults and can handle themselves and their issues together just fine," Storm spoke for Logan. I wonder if he liked that? I went to leave. I just about rounded the corner when the last thing I heard was:
"And if the Cajun goes near Rogue, he won't live long enough to enjoy those cigarettes I saw him buy last night." Always the father figure aren't you Wolverine? Well anyway I walked back to my room, finding it with ease and decided to take a long hot shower to wash away the pain and it bring happiness to me. And maybe later I'd go and chill in my room. It was the one place I knew the Cajun wouldn't be.
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AN: And here is the next chapter. Sorry it took so long, but there was a lot to cover, and then, I wrote it on my laptop, but I found out the hard way my computer doesn't like those cd's that you can store information on. It took me two days to re-type it. Sorry again and comment, compliments, and nice helping hints would be great. As always R&R!
Shout out! Whee! I love doing this! *goofy smile*
Q.S: I don't think I've heard that song, but I'm glad my story reminded you of it. Hey I guess I made it a song-fic then huh? Thank you for reviewing, and no Rogue wasn't crying. Would you cry if you felt your ex-boyfriend's pain that you were causing him, and you wanted to? No, so therefore she wasn't either. I know I made her cry here but the burdening emotions got the best of her. Won't happen to soon. Thank ya'!
LAE Meka: Thank you! Your so sweet to keep reviewing this ..... thing. Thank you about the compliment on my writing. I'm sure your good too. You get a sugar cookie, 'cause your sweet!
Carla-P: You like regular updates. Well I can't promise that, as how this wasn't but, I'll try, because you just love them so much. Thanks for the chocolate! I'm addicted to chocolate!
Epona04: Your sweet too! Thank you for the nice comments, and this chapter is for you. Enjoy and you get a Belladonna doll. They didn't seel as good as I thought they would. Go figure? *smiles*
Cate: You want Bella to get her ass kicked huh? I could do that. Not next chapter but maybe the next one. Whoa a lot of people are asking that one huh? Well thanks for the review, and keep reading for that chapter.
SickminderSucker: Yeah Rems does deserve to get beat down, but technically it wasn't his fault, although, I hope this chapter makes up for the beating. I'm sure I'll add more with him getting abused in some way shape or form. Thank you!
Ish: Next chapter, some Romy not a lot. Can't have them make up just yet. And Bella is getting what she deserves trust me. Not soon but she will. Heh heh. *eyes dart* Have a cookie!
Extacy: Regular updates? Don't know, could do but you'll have to talk to my teachers on the homework deal and I'm almost positive another chapter should be up this week. Fingers crossed. Thank you.
~Love and Peace215~