Every Bit of Nothing
Chapter One:
WHY?!
Disclaimer: All characters that are recognized are property of J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., Rain Coast Books, Bloomsbury Books, et cetra. Only the distinctive plot line and any other unrecognizable material belong to "El Ci Aech Johnson."
Draco's Point of View
"Hermione... Hermione... I think she's coming to guys!"
"Is she really Ron... you sure...?"
"Yeah look...Look! Hermione!"
"Stop calling me the mudblood's... stupid Weasel..." Weasel... wait... why was Weasley in his dormitory... that didn't make since... except...aarrgg... it was to bright in here to be his room.... And come to think of it the bed was rather uncomfortable and the blankets... they were thin and they were the ugly off-white color of the hospital wing comforters... why would he be in the hospital wing though... and why would Potty and his Weasel be near his bed... why couldn't he see clearly... everything looks fuzzy... he felt weird too an-
"Hey, looks like Malfoy's coming to over here too Harry."
"Ron... what... why's Malfoy here? ...Are we in the hospital wing? I feel weird... Harry... Harry... is that you?"
What...wait... THAT WAS HIS VOICE!!! BUT HE WASN'T TALKING!!! What in bloody hell was going on?! Why the hell did he have such a horrible headache... and why... his legs were soft... and hairless... his feet were smaller too... but-
"Hey Hermione... how're you feeling?"
That was Potty's voice...was he talking to him... he was standing right over him... but... maybe Granger was in here too... wherever "here" is... must be the Hospital Wing...
Time for that later though... right now his head hurt like he'd just had stones dropped on it... was that why he was her- Wait... THIS WASN'T HIS HAIR... HIS BEAUTIFUL BLOND LOCKS THAT CAME DOWN TO JUST BELOW HIS EARS... THIS HAIR WAS BUSHY... FRIZZY... CURLY... AND THERE WAS TONS OF IT! AND IT WAS EVERYWHERE!!!! That's it... something was wrong, he had to fin-
"Are they awake yet Potter?"
Hold on a second... that was Pansy's voice... no... this was not what he needed... not her... not the horrible banshee... he already had a headache... he didn't need a migraine... But maybe Baisle was with her... Baisle would know what was go-
"Yeah... Hermione is but Malfoy's a bit groggy... Not that I'd wish you upon him anyway Parkinson."
Well Potter wasn't so clueless... never mind Potty's intelligence, or lack thereof... he need to find out what was going on... he also needed a mirr-
"I agree Potter... where's Madam Pomfrey? She really should know if they're waking up..."
Yes Baisle was here!
"Baisle..." That wasn't his voice... that was... Granger's voice... But he was sure he said her name... Be did say her name... Did Granger say her name at the exact same time? Was his voice just not working properly?
Why was he in here though? And Granger was in here? Maybe they had gotten into a fight... But he didn't remember that... The last thing he remember was being in potions class... Was that it? Did the potion he took have some horrible side effect? But all they were making was a Polygraph Potion... and Granger was his partner... Still they couldn't have gotten the ingredients wrong... could they have? If they did then it was Granger's fault! Well, he'd get her in trouble later; right now he wanted a mirror.
"Baisle, Pansy... someone, get me a mirror will you?" He sounded like Granger again... but even Longbottom couldn't have screwed up the potion enough to make it a Voice Contrast Potion, and besides he would need Granger's saliva for that... Just the thought was disgusting...
"Don't order me around you stupid Mudblood!"
Did she just call him a mudblood? Whom in the world did she think that she was talking to? Perhaps she hadn't seen him ask... yes that would make sense... she'd just heard Granger's voice...
"Ms. Parkinson, I will not tolerate such language in my infirmary... especially when your prejudices are being directed at my patients!"
Oh good, Madam Pomfrey was here, maybe now he'd finely find out what was going on... Now where was she... it really was very blurry... unfocused... Oh well – BLOODY HELL!!! The floor sure was cold, my god... where were his sh-
"Ms. Granger, you shouldn't get up... I'm still not sure what caused you to pass out."
He wasn't Granger... she must be talking to him though... she was standing right above him...
"Hey Draco give me back my mirror... I was fixing my lipstick! You made me mess up!"
HE WAS DRACO! AND HE DIDN'T HAVE A MIRROR! Not that he cared if she got that bloody lipstick all over her face but...
"AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAA"
That was his voice! It came from the other side of the room... and he still couldn't see but... BUT THAT BLOODY WELL DID FLAMING LOOK LIKE HIS BODY!!! WHAT WAS GOING ON!!! THAT COULDN'T BE HIS BODY... Maybe it was just some other student with a nice toned back... And lean muscular arms... And The Same Pale Skin... And His Same Platinum Blond Hair, WHICH WAS CUT EXACTLY THE SAME AS HIS!!!
"Madam Pomfrey... Can I have a mirror?"
"Of course Ms. Granger..."
Granger... Granger... People kept calling him Granger... And his hair... it was bushy... brown... curly... frizzy... and his legs felt soft...and short...and he couldn't see very well... but-
"Here you are Hermione."
He was not Hermione... if they called him that one more time he'd hex them all into next Wednesday! What if he was though... maybe... he didn't want to look into the mirror...but no... he had to find out what was happening... Besides he was being stupid he wasn't – HE WAS GRANGER!!!!
HERMIONE-BLOODY-FUCKING-RUDDY-FLAMIING-NO-IT-ALL-MUDBLOOD-GRANGER WAS STARRING BACK AT HIM!!! GRANGER WITH HER RAT'S NEST HAIR... AND STUPID UGLY FRECKLES... AND ANNOYING AUTUMN EYES... AND HER NOT SO BIG ANYMORE TEETH!!!
"Oh no... This is not happening... I am not Granger?! I AM NOT RUDDY MUDBLOOD GRANGER!"
Let me know what you think... A few questions will be answered next chapter... but not to many... R&R... I really would like to know what people think, this is my first fic.