Anne
waited impatiently by the phone. Susan was supposed to call her three
hours ago and check in. It had been three whole hours. Anne tried
calling Billy, the new street gang leader to ask for his help, but he
wasn't answering his page either.
"Anne? Are you okay?"
A girl in the background asked after watching Anne pace back and
forth, clutching the phone and looking out the window every other
second.
"Yeah, I'm fine." She paused for a moment while
pulling back a piece of the blinds to look out the window again.
"Hey, Jess, will you hold down the fort for a while? I'm gonna
go and try to find Susan."
"I don't think that's really
smart, Anne."
"I didn't ask if you approved, Jess. I
asked if you could handle things by yourself for a couple of
hours."
Jess looked up at her and gave in. "Sure."
Anne
handed Jess the phone and hurried towards the back door. Fetching her
jacket and purse, she turned back calling to Jess again. "If
Susan calls or anything comes up, call me."
Anne walked
down the pathway at the park. It was dark and cold. The jacket she
brought didn't do half of the job that it was supposed to do. A
howling wind crossed the trees and whisked across the branches,
making Anne flinch and call out who's there nine times out of ten.
Crossing the bridge and landing at the beautiful greenhouse that she
adored so much, she stopped, hearing voices from the inside. Coming
closer, she listened carefully, instantly recognizing the voice as he
came out of the building.
"Billy?"
He turned towards
her. "Anne! Uh, hi."
"I've been trying to reach you
all night, what have you been doing? Why are you here? And who are
those people?"
"The question is why are you here Anne?
You run the shelter, you're not by personal babysitter so just leave
me alone and get out of my business."
"Oh, I'm so sorry,
Billy. I was just concerned about Susan. Yeah, you see, your cousin
is missing and I'm the only one who cares enough about her to look
for her." She added immediately. "And oh yeah, isn't that
why you are still alive?"
"Anne..."
"No,
Billy. You've bailed out on my too many times. You can return the
page and cell phone to the shelter tomorrow. You're fired!"
"Anne,
I wasn't even working for you."
"Yes, you were."
Anne stormed off, stopping just beyond the foot of the bridge and
wiping the lone tear from her eye. She shouldn't be crying, she
thought to herself. He wasn't the best gang leader and protector of
the shelter, but he had been there when things were in shambles. She
sat on the ground and tried to call the shelter again.
"East
Hills Teen Center. This is Jess, how can I help you?"
"Hi
Jess. It's just me. Anything yet?"
"Sorry,
Anne."
"Thanks Jess." She flipped the cell phone
back and slipped it into her purse. Man, she sure needed a friend
right now. The tear rolled down her cheek again. Everything seemed to
be right on track now. The shelter had a new home, they gained new
sponsorship and some of the kids had even gotten their lives on
track. But the truth was that she was falling apart. She tried to be
strong, like Buffy ad been for her when she first came to Los
Angeles, but she wasn't Buffy and she didn't have any supernatural
strength or power. She was just plain ol' Annie Steele, give or take
a few names. She stood up and started to walk back towards the
shelter, figuring it would do her better being there than out here in
the dusk of night with who know what loose in the City of
Angels.
"City of Angels my ass." She muttered under her
breath, rolling her eyes along with it.
"Your ass? Now there
is something I'd never thought I'd here you say, but I second
that."
She turned around to the familiar sounding voice to
find the only man she had ever trusted with her entire being: Charles
Gunn."Susan?" When did she get all smart
and want to help?" Gunn questioned. He had known little Susan
since she was born and she had always been a troublemaker.
"Yeah,
Gunn, people do change ya know." Anne said, punching him in the
arm as they walked out of the deep forest park.
"Yeah I
know." He paused and looked over at her. "So, how you doing
Annie?"
"Did you know that you're the only one who calls
me that?"
"Well then, I guess I have special rights
then?"
"I wouldn't go that far, but you are the only man
I trust with my life."
"I can do that."
"Good,
because you really have no choice." Anne responded as they
walked down the pathway. Gunn put his arm over her shoulder and brung
her head into his side. He started to nuzzle her hair when she
stopped him from messing it up. "So, what brings you down this
way?"
"Just wanted to go for a walk."
"Trouble
with Illyria again?" Anne guessed.
"More like words with
Angel and Spike."
"What kind of words?"
"Bad
ones."
"What about? I mean, I am a big girl and I'm all
grown up now." She asked as he turned and looked at her.
"You
know I can talk to you about anything, I just...well they were just
words and I needed to get some air away from them."
"Nothing
wrong with that."
"Are you headed back to the shelter
now?"
"Yeah, there's really nothing I can do out here. I
guess I just needed some air too." She smiled up towards him as
they neared the street corner. Right then, without warning as usual,
a vampire appeared with his fangs sharp as they could be. Gunn
stepped in front and instantly staked the demon. He turned around to
retrieve her.
"You okay?" He asked, looking at the fear
in her eyes. "Yeah, it's just been a while since...Man, can you
actually believe that I actually used to want to be one of
them?"
"Let's get on home." Gunn slid his arm
around her and they walked off.Anne looked up at the
darkened sky with the little beads of light seeping through. She
remembered the stars back on her grandma's farm in Oklahoma. It was
peaceful there, with green plains all around and the horses grazing
the land. But there were also bad memories there too. Too many too
name. They finally reached the new shelter. He walked up the steps
and opened the door for her. She pushed the door open to find Jess
pacing back and forth this time, with the phone next to her ear.
"I'm
back." She called. "Gunn, come in." She grabbed his
hand and pulled him in, knowing that he would probably retreat back
out the door.
"I don't want to intrude on anything."
"Gimme
a break, Gunn." Anne placed her purse and jacket on the table
and walked towards the community room."
"Anne! I'm go
glad you're back! Why don't you have your phone on?"
"Slow
down Jess. What's going on?"
"Susan. She's upstairs."
Jess said as Anne zoomed past her and up the steep stairs.
"Susan!
Susan!" Anne called.
"I'm here Anne." Susan said in
her petite voice, sitting in one of the rooms on the bed.
"Where
the hell have you been?" Anne took over in her motherly worried
voice.
"Out."
"Out where?"
"None of
your business."
"I think it is my business Susan.
Especially when you are paid to work here and then go out for a
joyride. I am the only one that's giving you a chance right now,
Susan. Either you comply by the rules here or you get out."
Rolling
her eyes, Susan finally gave in. "I went to see Sam."
"Susan!
It's Sam for goodness sake. He's no good, honey, just no
good."
"Oh, but Billy and Jack and David are?"
"They
were once upon a time, but they're all gone now and why are we
talking about my love life? This is about you." Anne said,
coming closer to the girl and kneeling down. Anne put her hands over
Susan's kneecaps and looked up at her. "You came to me in the
first place to get away from him and you came because you needed
solace, true? So, I think we need to start over again. Your demons
are catching up with you Susan. You're going to have to face them
sometime."
"What if I don't want to?"
"I
don't think you have a choice in that, Susan." Anne stood up.
"So why don't you get some sleep and we'll talk about this
tomorrow sometime."
Susan laid back in the bed and pulled the
blanket over her. Anne stepped out of the room and started to head
downstairs. Rubbing her hands over her face, she felt the exhaustion
all over her body. She found Gunn and Jess picking up the dirty
dishes and left over "toys" in the community room and
putting them in their rightful place.
"Hey, how'd it go?"
Jess turned to find Anne there, watching them silently.
"Better
than I thought. Why don't you go on to bed? I can take it from
here."
"Are you sure?" Jess asked before handing
over the things in her arms. Anne nodded her head and not a minute
later, Jess was upstairs and Anne was struggling to keep the "toys"
in her arms. She threw them into the storage bins and followed Gunn
back to the kitchen with the dirty dishes.
A half an hour later,
they both looked wiped out. Sitting at the table, sipping her tea and
him downing his coffee, the silence was overbearing. He took a hold
of her hand and clutched on.
"You'll get to her you
know."
"Yeah, but how long will it take?"
"I
can't tell you that Annie, but I know that you will. You're Annie
Steele, the heart of downtown. You'd do anything for these kids and
it shows. I mean, look around you. New staff, new place, new
furnishings...what more could a girl ask for?"
"A new
life?" Anne paused and looked up at him. "I've built this
life, so many years ago. I've worked so hard to make these kids'
lives better than mine was. When I first got here, someone helped me,
and I wanted to do the same for these kids. And tonight? Tonight I
felt like I was going to lose it all. Like I wasn't getting through
to her at all."
"Oh, Annie..."
"Charles,
when does that whole facing your demons-atonement-redemption thing
happen again?"
"Beats me."
"Well, if you
find out please tell me."
"You'll be the first one on my
list." He smiled and brushed her hand back from her face,
noticing the weariness. But he knew that she wasn't ready to go bed.
So he sat there with her, in the silence, holding her hand, sipping
tea and just being there.
