A/N: Ok, first of all, thank u guys so much for ur reviews... About the person that didn't like this story... well, I'm sorry then but I can't please everybody. If u don't like it, just don't read it.

About this chapter, I know it's short but I wrote it last night when I had a killer headache so I don't think its very good... but pls review and tell me what u think.

Chapter 1

I walk into the ambulance bay and my eyes soon meet a couple going into the hospital. As I get a bit closer, I see it's Carter and Kem. He has his arm around her shoulders, holding her close. I can feel an intense feeling building up inside of me. Who am I kidding? Of course I'm jealous! As much as I've tried to deny it, to get over him and move on, I just can't. Something stronger keeps pulling me back to him. I don't want to feel this anymore. I love him, I will always love him. I just want him to be happy. And if she's making him happy, I guess I'll just have to deal with that.

"Kinda makes you want a dose of Compazine, doesn't it?" someone says behind me. I turn around and see Susan holding little Ben. "I still don't know what he sees in her." She says shaking her head standing next to me.

"Yeah." It's all I can say for now. Ben recognizes my voice and shakes his little arms and legs trying to get to me. Susan hands me the fussy baby. I take the 3-month-old in my arms smiling down at him. "Hi, Ben. Did you want to see your aunt Abby?" I ask him in a baby voice. His little hand finds my finger and he holds onto it. Soon it's on his mouth and he's suckling happily on my knuckle. "I think he's hungry." I tell Susan but she just rolls her eyes at me.

"I just fed him a few minutes ago. He's just using your finger as a pacifier." She says grinning. "You like your auntie Abby, don't you sweetie?"

"What's he doing here anyway? I thought Chuck was gonna stay with him today." I say still looking down at the baby. And to think I had a chance to have a cute baby like that and I blew it.

"He is. He's gonna pick Ben up here. He had to stay over time, covering for a friend or something." Susan says as we walk to the hospital.

We go to the lounge and guess who's there. Exactly. Carter and her. Susan looks at me and we rolls our eyes at each other.

"Hi, Carter, Kem." She says nodding at them. I nod too. I don't trust myself enough to talk.

"Hi." He says with a sad smile. Damn, it hurts so much to see him like this.

We put our stuff in our lockers and head out to the admit desk, Susan and I giving Kem a cold stare on our way out. We didn't mean to but we just couldn't help it. Ben, still in my arms, gets tired of my finger and starts to cry. I hand him over to Susan who calms him down in an instant.

As we're standing at the admit, me to get my first chart of the day, and Susan waiting for Chuck, we overhear Kem talking to Carter.

"... and I don't think your friends like my being here." It's what we hear.

"Damn right we don't!" Susan and I mutter under our breaths. We realize it after a few seconds, look at each other and burst out laughing. Carter comes to us, alone this time.

"Good mood you two are in today..." he says grabbing a chart.

Only on the outside, Carter. Inside, I'm breaking as each day goes by. If he only knew...