Hey everyone i know its been awhile since i updated this story but i just couldnt find a way to go on. Soo my bete reader Hells-angel8 took over to help me out, soo this ones from her and the next one will problay be from me. Now on with the story

After a little while I returned to Duo's room to see if he was feeling better and wanted me to be with him. I knocked gently on the door and waited for him to answer.

"Go away," I heard him say from inside the room.

"Duo. It's me, Heero. Can I come in?" I asked still outside his door. A moment later I heard some rustling inside the room and then saw the door open. Duo smiled at me. A smile that was genuine and true and just for me.

"Come on in Heero." He then reached out a hand and pulled me into the room and then shut the door. He then turned into my arms and wrapped both of his around my waist and put his head on my shoulder. The warmth of his body wrapped around mine made me feel complete and I was so happy that he was mine. He began to nuzzle my neck with his nose then kissed me there as well. I couldn't help but smile.

"Are you feeling better now?" I asked quietly making sure not to shatter the moment. I felt him nod his head against my neck.

"Yeah I'm feeling a little better now. Thanks for asking." He kept his head where it was and I kept my arms around him for a few more minutes before deciding I needed to get to the bottom of this problem of cutting he was going through. Slowly I took my arms away and then pushed him back a little so I could see his face.

"Duo? You know that I'm always going to be here for you no matter what right? That you can tell me anything at all? I want you to tell me how this started. Why you began to cut yourself? I won't judge you believe me. I used to cut myself too, until I realized that the pain I felt didn't solve my problems. It only created new problems for me to face later. So tell me, please?" I pleaded him so I could understand his reasons for doing it.

Duo took a deep breath of air and began to tell me. "It started after one of our missions. I don't remember exactly which one but I know it was after one of them. I felt so empty and lifeless that I didn't even know who I was anymore. I felt that I couldn't feel anything and so I took one of my razors and sliced my arm.

"The sudden pain of the cut let me know I could still feel something. I could feel the pain I had caused myself. After I realized that I could still feel I stopped cutting and bandaged up my arm so no one would notice. I started to cut myself every time I thought I couldn't feel anymore and the pain would bring me back to reality. As painfully as the cuts were, they made me feel somewhat alive. Even if for only a few minutes, I still needed those few minutes to find myself once again." Duo ended his story the looked at me to see what I thought of him now.

I smiled softly at him to reassure him that I didn't think any less of him. He hesitantly smiled back at me as well and then hugged me to him. I returned the hug and then decided to tell him about my own experience to make him feel better.

"Duo. I know exactly what you have gone through. I felt the same way when I was cutting myself as well. I felt that nothing could affect me any more so I looked forward to the pain I caused myself to make me feel like I was real and not some kind of weapon for this war that we're in. But then I met you.

"You, who are so full of life and could smile and joke in the worst of situations. You became the reason why I could quit cutting. You made me feel alive Duo. I want to be the reason that you feel alive too, so you can stop cutting and inducing more pain and feel alive with me."

I looked down at Duo then and saw the tears in his eyes. But I knew these were tears of hope and joy and not of sadness and pain.

"You really mean that Heero?" He asked, his voice cracking as tears cascaded down his cheeks.

"Yes Duo. I meant every single word." I whispered back at him and he just let the tears run freely and latched his arms tighter around me. All I had to do was hold him until he was spent and we sank to the floor together. He fell asleep in my arms. Completely wiped out from his emotions that he showed me and all I could do was hug him to me and stay with him.