I know… I'm a liar!  I said yesterday, I know, I know, but I finished my exams yesterday and spent the day celebrating away from my computer, I'm a terrible person!  Anyway, here it is, a day late, but here it is.  The seventh part, if my brain serves me, which it may not.

Disclaimer time.  Who can we have do it. Relena waving hand in the air frantically, author ignores her and Duo throws stuff at her

Duo:  What about the can?

Me: Oh yeah! Picks up can Before the disclaimer, I have to open this can.  Takes lid of can, and the party PATTY and Jillian sent bursts out

Heero: Is that Chinese food?  Eyes the delicious foods, then all the cast fall on said food

Me: grins Thanks for the fantastic party in the can PATTY and Jillian watches some spectacular fireworks, Duo is in background waving a rather large paper dragon around with two egg rolls stuffed in his mouth Disclaimer, before we forget, Treize?

Treize: Looks at his pork fried rice sadly, but stands up Lucas does not own Gundam Wing or Disney; if she did she could probably afford a better car.  This story is 6X2, this means it's yaoi.  If you don't like this, you're crazy. Author glares at Treize I mean, if you don't like that, don't read this.  All flames will be used in the ultimate weapon of destruction and then used on flamers.

Me: Also, there is some 3X4 references in this one.

Me: mumbles around mouthful of moo goo guypan thank you. Swallows Now to thank everyone who has reviewed this story, because I love you.

gundam06serenity – I've posted, see?  Don't hurt me!  Lol, just kidding, thanks for the review gives gundam06serenity some food

Yu~ki~ko – Glad you liked the fluff thing ^__^, thanks for the review. Gives Yu~ki~ko some food

Karina – Here's some more story, as you requested, thank you for you review! Gives karina some food

PATTY 40 and Jillian – Thank you for the party in the can, we're thoroughly enjoying it.  No one has got burned so far.  I gave all the fortune cookies to Trowa because he has to sing in this instalment Trowa looks up, alarmed.  Thanks for your review Lets PATTY and Jillian help themselves to whatever they want.

Kawaii Kinomoto – thanks for both of your reviews, I know some of my characters are messed up ^.^'' gives Kawaii Kinomoto some food

On with the story!

Be our guest

Duo pressed his ear against the door and listened hard.  All sounded silent beyond the wood so Duo bit his lip and pushed the door open.  He stuck his head out into the hall and looked around.  He could see no one anywhere.

Behind some nearby curtains Trowa had hold of Quatre, the feather duster, in an intimate embrace.

"Oh no!" Quatre giggled as he half-heartedly struggled against Trowa's grasp.

"Oh yes!" Trowa purred as he pulled him closer.

"Oh no!" Quatre laughed again as he got free and came out from behind the curtain.

"Oh, yes, yes, yes," Trowa practically moaned as he reached for Quatre again.

"I've been 'burned' by you before," Quatre joked as Trowa grabbed hold of him again and bent him low.  Trowa chuckled as he looked over Quatre's head at some movement that had caught his eye.  He gasped and dropped Quatre, who squeaked.

"Damn it!" Trowa said under his breath as he watched Duo make his way down the stairs, "He's surfaced!"

Sally, Treize and Wufei were moving around the kitchen, finishing the clearing up from the failed dinner.

"You should go to bed," Sally said to Treize.  He looked at her incredulously.

"How old do you think I am?" he questioned with raised eyebrows, "I am not tired!"

Sally merely shrugged and carried on with what she was doing.  Treize rolled his eyes at her.

"I work and I slave all day long," the chef, who was a cooker, griped as he moved pots around on his surface, "and for what?  A culinary masterpiece, gone to waste!"

"Oh shut your pie hole," Sally admonished, "It's been a long night for all of us."

"Well, if you ask me, he was just being stubborn," Wufei said angrily as he threw a duster into one of the cupboards, "After all, Master Zechs did say please."

Sally would have shaken her head, if she had a head, but settled for a roll of her eyes.

"Yes, he did, but he did it in such a way it was very easy to say no to."

"That boy has no…"

"Justice," Sally and Treize finished in unison, which earned them an icy glare.

"If Master Zechs does not learn to control his temper, he'll never break the sp…" Sally was saying as Duo pushed the door to the kitchen open.

"Splendid to see you out and about young sir," Wufei cut in, quickly.  Duo knelt down in front of the clock, "I'm Wufei, I run the household," Wufei said as he attempted to take Duo's proffered hand.  Duo watched as this Wufei was shunted out of the way by a handsome candle.  The candle took his hand and smiled.

"This is Trowa," Wufei said unenthusiastically as Treize laughed in the background.

"Enchanté," Trowa said as he began to kiss Duo's hand enthusiastically.

Wufei was attempting to move Trowa out of the way so he could speak with Duo properly.

"If there's anything… stop that," he hissed as he moved Trowa away slightly, "we can do… please," he said in exasperation as he finally moved Trowa away and held him at bay, "to make your stay more comfortable?" He managed to finish.  Trowa glowered at him and burnt his hand.  Wufei cursed as he grabbed hold of his hand.  Duo laughed out loud at this display.

"Well, I am a little hungry," he confessed.  His stomach decided to give conformation of this by growling loudly.

"You are?" Sally said interestedly, she turned to several bowls and jars, "Here that?  He's hungry!  Stoke the fire, break out the sliver," millions of knives and forks jump out of the drawers, "Wake the china," Sally said to the silverware.

"Remember what Master Zechs said," Wufei said to her under his breath.

"Oh sod that!" she said as she turned her nose in the air.  She instructed some bowls and jars into action, who made a porridge dish, "I'm not about to let the poor child go hungry."

"Do you think everyone is under the age of ten?" Treize asked with fake interest.  Sally chose to ignore him.

"Oh all right then!" Wufei said irritably, "Glass of water crust of bread…"

"Wufei," Trowa scolded, "I'm surprised at you.  He's not a prisoner here, he's our guest."

"I think you have your definitions of guest and prisoner mixed up," Duo said sardonically, but smiled anyway.

"Follow me," Trowa said as he opened the door for Duo and allowed him to pass through. 

Wufei moved forward to speak to Trowa, "Fine, but keep it down," he advised, "If Master Zechs finds out about this, it will be our necks."

"Of course, of course," Trowa said dismissively, "but what is dinner, without a little music?"  He retreated through the door.

"Music!" Wufei screeched before the door hit him in the face and sent him flying, "INJUSTICE!" he screeched as he flew through the air and into one of the dishes.

Duo looked around the darkened room for some signs of life.

A spotlight lit up the table, illuminating Trowa, "Mon chèr monsieur," he said to Duo who moved forward to the edge of the table, "It is with deepest pride, and greatest pleasure, that we welcome you tonight."  He waved his matchstick, which he was using as a cane and his candle cap, which was his hat.

"So, we invite you to relax, let us pull up a chair," as Trowa said this, a chair came running up behind Duo and hit him in the back of the legs so that he had to sit down, "As the dining room proudly presents," Trowa carried on, "your dinner."

Several platters of food jumped onto the table.

[Trowa:]   Be our guest

                Be our guest

                Put our service to the test

                Tie your napkin 'round your neck, chèrie Duo's chair tries to tie a napkin round his neck, but Duo takes the napkin and places it on his lap

                And we provide the rest

                Soup du jour

                Hot hors d'oeuvres

                Why, we only live to serve proffers a tray to Duo

                Try the grey stuff, it's delicious Duo sticks his finger in it and then tastes

                Don't believe me? Ask the dishes dishes burst out of cabinet and dance

                They can sing

                They can dance

                After all, friend, this is France cutlery and dishes make the Eiffel tower

                And a dinner here is never second best

                Go on, unfold your menu Duo picks up menu and looks through

                Take a glance and then you'll

                Be our guest

                Oui, our guest

                Be our guest Foods start to parade past Duo

                Beef ragout

                Cheese soufflé

                Pie and pudding "en flambé" Wufei sits up in pie as Trowa 'flambé's it.  He is burnt and he collapses back into the dish

                We'll prepare and serve with flair

                A culinary cabaret

                You're alone

                And you're scared

                But the banquet's all prepared

                No one's gloomy or complaining

                While the flatware's entertaining

                We tell jokes

                I do tricks

                With my fellow candlesticks is juggling his candles as he his lifted into the air

[Mugs:]         And it's all in perfect taste

                That you can bet

[All:]          Come on and lift your glass Mugs pass drink between themselves

                You've won your own free pass

                To be out guest

[Trowa:]      If you're stressed

                It's fine dining we suggest

[All:]          Be our guest Wufei runs long table shushing everyone

                Be our guest

                Be our guest Music stops abruptly, leaving Wufei alone on the table

[Trowa:]      Life is so unnerving

                For a servant who's not serving Wufei grins and tries to move off the table

                He's not whole without a soul to wait upon Trowa has hold of Wufei, who blows the candles out

                Ah, those good old days when we were useful It appears snow is falling.  Wufei looks and up and sees saltshakers, he looks annoyed

                Suddenly those good old days are gone Wufei groans

                Ten years we've been rusting

                Needing so much more than dusting

                Needing exercise, a chance to use our skills Wufei is trying to pull out of Trowa's grasp, succeeds and is sent flying

                Most days we just lay around the castle Wufei is stuck head first in some jelly

                Flabby, fat and lazy

                You walked in and oops-a-daisy! Trowa jumps on a spoon in the jelly and Wufei is sent flying again

[Sally:]    It's a guest

                It's a guest

                Sakes alive, well I'll be blessed

                Wine's been poured and thank the Lord watches bottles roll by

                I've had the napkins freshly pressed napkins dance around her

                With dessert

                He'll want tea

                And my dear that's fine with me

                While the cups do their soft shoeing cups are dancing around

                I'll be bubbling, I'll be brewing

                I'll get warm is amidst lots of steaming pots

                Piping hot sees herself in surface of a pot

                Heaven's sakes! Is that a spot?

                Clean it up! We want the company impressed napkin comes and cleans the spot

                We've got a lot to do Goes into the dining room on a tray with other pots and cups

                Is it one lump or two?

                For you, our guest? Pours tea into Treize, whom Duo picks up

[Chorus:]       He's our guest

[Sally:]    He's our guest Vases of flowers dance along the table, throwing petals everywhere, one stops and gives Duo a flower

[Chorus:]       He's our guest

                Be our guest

                Be our guest Wufei is trying to make everyone leave, but is knocked off the table by several feather dusters, led by Quatre, who are cleaning up the flower petals

                Our command is your request

                It's ten years since we had anybody here

                And we're obsessed

                With your meal

                With your ease

                Yes, indeed, we aim to please

                While the candlelight's still glowing candles do a Mexican wave to reveal Trowa at the end

                Let us help you

                We'll keep going

                Course by course Trowa is doing a slow can-can

                One by one

                'Til you shout, "Enough! I'm done!"

                Then we'll sing you off to sleep as you digest Duo gasps as a big chandelier descends from the ceiling with forks can-caning on it

                Tonight you'll prop your feet up

                But for now, let's eat up

                Be our guest

                Be our guest Wufei is getting into the spirit of things

                Be our guest

                Please, be our guest Wine bottle corks fly out, wine spurts everywhere, Wufei is dancing in the middle of the table until Trowa slides into him, knocking him out of the way

"Yeah!" Duo yells as he claps vigorously, "That was FAN-bloody-TASTIC!  Do it again!"

"Thank you," Wufei said, bowing, as everyone else who wasn't a principle part clears out, "Thank you, yes, good show wasn't it?"

Some napkins that are moving past, stop, stare and shake their heads in disbelief.

"Oh my, look at the time," Wufei said, pointing at his face.  Duo snorted, trying not to laugh; "Now it's off to bed, off to bed."

"Oh I couldn't go to sleep now!" Duo said with a wide grin, "I've never been in an enchanted castle before."

Trowa moved beside Wufei as the clock started to seat, "Enchanted?  Who said anything about the castle being enchanted?" Wufei said quickly as he watched a fork run passed him.  His eyes went very wide, "You, button it!" he hissed at Trowa and grabbed hold of a piece of wax that fell over one of the candle's eyes and pulled.  Trowa struggled against him.  Duo raised an eyebrow and smiled some more.

"I, ah, figured it out myself," he said to the fighting objects.  Wufei let go of Trowa's wax and Trowa shoved him away and patted the wax back into place very carefully.

"I'd love to have a look around," Duo said as he looked around the room he was in at the moment.

"Perhaps you would like a tour?" Trowa said to Duo with a smile.

"Great!"  Duo enthused as he stood up.

"Do you think that's such a good idea?  He can't go poking around in certain places if you know what I mean?" Wufei said out of the side of his mouth to Trowa.  Trowa stared at him, nonplussed.

"Wufei, I think the carpet knows what you mean," he said with a quick glance up to heaven.  Wufei glared at him.

Duo watched this little exchange and leant forward on the table, "Maybe you could show me around?" he asked Wufei, "I bet you know everything there is to know about the castle." 

Wufei looked flattered and mollified as Duo risked a look at Trowa, who gave him a thumbs up and a wink.

"Well…" Wufei said as he looked at the tabletop and smiled, "Yes, I do."

There!  I'm going to end it there I think.  Sorry if it was lame, but I should update again pretty soon 'cause my exams are over now, yay!

Until next time, ja-bye-bye!