Samijoe rules. Rawk.

The Orange Soda Will Get You Every Time: Pt. 10

"NO!"

"Daniel Holden Mariano! You get back here, young man!"

Luke sighed as his nephew chased his great-nephew around the diner. "Jess..."

"I don't care how much you hate baths!" Jess growled. "You're taking one. Now."

Dan slid under the counter and hid behind Luke's legs.

Jess rolled his eyes and threw his hands up. "Swear to god, Dan. Rory's gonna be here in twenty minutes. If you're not upstairs and in that bathroom in twenty seconds, you're not getting any orange soda for a month."

Dan shot out from under the counter and up the stairs.

"I remember when you were that age," Luke said with smirk.

"Oh, yeah?" Jess asked.

Luke nodded. "I almost threw you out a window."

"Huh."

"DAD! I'M IN THE BATHROOM!" Dan yelled down. "SHOULD I TURN ON THE WATER?!"

"WAIT FOR ME!" Jess called up. "Duty calls."

"Have fun, Daddy," Luke teased.

Jess gave him a bitter look and rushed up the stairs.

Luke laughed a little just as Rory and Lorelai walked into the diner.

"Hey," Lorelai smiled, sitting at the counter.

Rory smiled too, and took a seat. "Jess ready yet?"

Luke nodded. "Jess has been ready for an hour, but he just got Dan into the tub."

"What is it with that kid and bathing?" Lorelai asked. "Is he allergic to soap or something?"

"He's five, and a boy," Luke explained. "They like being dirty."

Rory and Lorelai both snickered and Luke rolled his eyes.

"So I call my mom Ms. Kathy."

"You're okay with that?" Jess asked as he sat on the closed toilet seat.

Dan nodded. "I guess."

"Rory and I can stay in if you want," Jess told him. "I don't want to leave you with her if you really don't want-"

"No, you and Rory have to go on your date," Dan said. "Ms. Patty says that... S-E-X happens on the third date."

Jess paled. "When... when did you talk to Ms. Patty...?"

"I heard her on Sunday morning... she was talking to Ms. Babette. They were talking about S-E-X."

"...Huh..."

"What's S-E-X?"

Jess stared at him blankly. "Never you mind."

"Can I look it up?"

"Nope."

"Can I ask Uncle Luke?"

Jess smirked. "Yes."

Dan smiled back. "Okay."

"Rory."

Rory glanced behind her and smirked at the woman coming through the diner door. "Kathy."

For a moment, Rory honestly thought that she should act more... vicious towards the other woman... perhaps be somewhat jealous, but she was finding it difficult. She was no longer a teenaged girl, and after all, she did have the upper hand.

She was going on a date with Jess. Again.

She smiled brightly.

Now she felt like a teenager.

That was the moment Jess came bounding down the stairs with Dan in his arms. The boy was fresh from a bath, and scowling murderously.

Rory's smile grew wider as Jess approached her. He leaned down and kissed her briefly before setting Dan on a stool.

"Hi."

"Hi."

He smirked at her. "You look great."

She looked down at the simple maroon dress she'd dug out of her mother's closet. "Thanks." She looked over his slacks and button-down shirt, covered by his unzipped leather jacket. "So do you."

Jess was about to say something else when Kathy cleared her throat.

"Hi," he offered awkwardly.

She smiled. "Hey. Nice threads."

He nodded a little. "Okay... Bedtime is at eight." He glanced at Dan. "Hear that?"

Dan nodded.

Jess sighed. "Give him orange soda if he wants... which he will... no other sugar though. If he's hungry, Luke can dig up something healthy for him. No weird movies tonight, because he was complaining today about Yellow Submarine giving him funky dreams, and we have an early day tomorrow to head home."

Lorelai snickered. "So much for monosyllabic boy."

Rory laughed along with her mother.

Jess rolled his eyes and turned to Dan. "Don't be a pain."

"Okay," Dan nodded.

Jess wrapped an arm around him. "You're gonna be okay."

Dan gave him another nod, and then turned to the counter. "Hey, Uncle Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"What is S-E-X?"

Luke developed the oddest look on his face. "Uh..."

Lorelai did her best to hold back her laughter.

Jess smirked widely and took Rory's hand. "We're leaving. Don't wait up."

Rory snickered and grabbed her coat on the way out the door, leaving Luke completely dumbfounded.

"What was that all about?"

Jess glanced at her as they walked to his car. "What?"

Rory laughed. "S-E-X?"

Jess shrugged. "Kids these days."

Dan sat at the counter. "S-E-X is when a stork brings a baby to your house?"

Luke nodded as he cleaned the counter. "That's right."

Dan looked at Lorelai questioningly. "Really?"

Lorelai nodded and pulled him into her lap. "You came in a little blue blanket. And the stork was really drunk when he brought you... he dropped you but your dad- while he seriously lacks in throwing skills- can catch like a pro."

"Hey! Look who's back!"

Dan turned and smiled. "Hi!"

Lindsay walked over and tousled his hair a little. "What're you doing here?"

"There was a little drama last night," Luke explained as Dean walked up behind Lindsay. "Jess and Rory are out again, so we're on Dan Duty."

Dan looked up at Dean. "You're really tall."

Dean nodded. "Yeah. I think my mom snuck plant fertilizer into my vegetables when I was little."

Dan wrinkled his nose. "Ew."

Dean nodded. "Gross, isn't it?"

"You're as big as the Hulk," Dan said, switching back to the subject of Dean's height.

Dean laughed and lifted Dan into the air and started swinging him in the air. "HULK SMASH!"

Kathy got up, and walked over nervously. "Excuse me... could you not give my son brain damage...?"

Dean stopped swinging Dan around. "Sorry..."

Lindsay blinked. "Kathy, right?"

The other woman nodded. "Hello."

"Hi," Lindsay replied icily.

Dan pouted a little. "I like getting brain damage, Ms. Kathy. It's fun."

Kathy sighed. "Dan, please call me mom... or mommy? Mother? You don't have to call me Ms. Kathy."

Dan hopped down from Dean's arms and hid behind his leg.

"So, what have you been doing for the past eight years?" Jess asked. "I mean... you've pretty much seen what I've been doing..."

"Well... traveling a lot," Rory nodded as they ate dinner. "Working... There's not much to tell... dated a little... Oh, my god, one of my co-workers set me up with this guy when we were in Italy on assignment."

Jess smirked. "You don't speak Italian."

Rory shook her head. "It was a disaster."

"I know some Italian," Jess admitted.

Rory laughed a little. "How?!"

He shrugged. "I'm part Italian... some of my friends had Italian grandparents growing up... you pick up a few things."

"Say something in Italian."

"No."

Rory pouted. "Please?"

He sighed. "Sto cadendo nell'amore con voi," he said.

"What does that mean?"

He smirked and picked up his fork to eat.

"Evil," Rory accused. "Tell me!"

"Not on your life, Gilmore."

"No fair!"

Jess smirked and ate more.

Dan had come out from behind Dean's leg and sat back down at the counter.

"Do storks have licenses?"

Lorelai nodded. "Yup. They get points on it if they fly drunk. Your stork got fired. Huge blow-up about it. You wouldn't believe it! He sued the company!"

"Really?!"

Lorelai nodded.

Kathy rolled her eyes and took a seat next to Dan. "Hey, kiddo."

"Hi," Dan said quietly.

She nudged him playfully and smiled. "What's say you and I get outta here for a while, huh?"

Dan shook his head. "Dad said to stay here."

"He worries too much," Kathy replied.

Lorelai cleared her throat. "Jess just doesn't want Dan out late again. It's almost his bedtime."

"He can stay up later," Kathy argued. "He's been good tonight."

Dan shrank a little and inched toward Lorelai. "I like it here. Can't we stay here?"

"Aw, come on!" Kathy urged. "I know this great convenience store right outside of town. Best orange soda ever."

"Really?" Dan asked, his voice a little hopeful.

Kathy grinned. "Really."

They'd been walking around, talking and drinking hot coffee for the past hour. The winter wind had picked up and she walked close to him for warmth. He draped his arm around her shoulder.

"Hey, Rory," he said tentatively.

"Yeah?"

"Uhm... about the... what I said in the restaurant..."

She smiled. "You said many things in the restaurant."

Jess sighed, obviously a little uncomfortable. "I mean... the Italian..."

"Yes?" Rory asked quietly, looking up at him.

He stopped their walking and turned to her, looking her in the eyes. "It uhm... it means... well... kind of a sketchy translation of..."

His cell phone rang.

He sighed. "Jeez. I knew I should have let Dan pour soda on that thing." He pulled it out of his pocket and flipped it open. "Hello...? Yeah..." His eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. "WHAT?! Who the hell was driv-"He gritted his teeth. "I'm on my way." He turned the phone off, and shook his head.

"Hey," Rory said softly. "What's wrong?"

"That was Hartford general."

Rory squinted. "Hospital?"

Jess nodded, and threw his cell phone to the ground. "Dammit! I knew it! I knew I shouldn't have let her baby-sit! I knew this was a bad idea! Why don't I trust my gut instincts anymore?!"

"What happened?" Rory asked worriedly.

"Dan's in the hospital!" Jess said frantically. "My kid is in the hospital, because his mother got into a car accident!"

"Calm down," Rory said, trying to be soothing. "Is he alright?"

Jess sighed and crossed his arms tightly over his chest. "Broken leg."

Rory nodded. "Come on. Let's go." She took his hand.

He nodded and they rushed to the car.