His Death

Part two: Mourning over the dog

It happened a week ago. Just seven days. Or 168 hours ago. 10080 minutes if you like.

But for me it seemed so much longer.

I didn't do anything this week. Mostly laying and crying in my bed in Grimmoudplace. The place were Sirius spent every day since the Order was reformed.

The only times I came outside my chamber was to get something to drink.

Always the heavy stuff. My days were spent in three things. Sleeping, drinking and mooring.

The third day after well you know, Molly came upstairs. I could here the footsteps hit the wooden old stairs of this house.

'Remus?' She said in a soft voice as she opened the door and walked inside.

I didn't looked to her, I just starred to my hands which lay in my lap.

Then she sat next to me at the bed. She pulled my hands in her own.

'Remus, I know it's hard for you. It is hard for us all. But one thing I know about Sirius, and that is that he always wanted that his friends were happy. He didn't want you to be like this.'

I decided not to answer. Of course I knew he didn't, he didn't want a lot if things to happen. But it did happen...

'Do you want to talk about it?' She asked me, again I didn't answer.

'If you want to talk about it you can come to me Remus.' She continued in her soft comforting voice.

Then she let go of my hands again. Waiting for me to begin my story. Which never came.

'I will make some dinner for you. Will you come down tonight. We all miss you around Remus.' Again I didn't answer.

'I will just wait for you.' Then she stood up, and walked back to the door.

She turned the handle down..

'Molly?' I said. Both she and I could hear I cried a lot.

'Yes dear?' She said in a hoping voice as the turned around once more.

'Can you bring me another bottle?' I heard her sniff behind me. She didn't approve me drinking.

'Sure I can.' Then she left..

I can't remember her bringing the bottle, but the next time I awoke there stood a new bottle on my pedestal cupboard.

But this day something changed my destroying routine.

And the question was what am I going to do about it.

The third day off the summer vacation was almost over. Alastor Moody al ready made plans to visit Harry Potter. Since he didn't sent a note in three days.

He almost dragged me out of my sleep chamber, into the kitchen where already many people stood. Molly even gave me something to eat just then, saying I would need my strength. Just when I was about to complain Dumbledore came into the room.

After about an hour of planning, in the tiniest details, we all saw an owl flying in.

A very white owl.

Hedwig.

She finally came, carrying his letter.

The owl flew a few times over out heads, until Professor Dumbledore raised his arm were Hedwig took place.

Dumbledore removed it, and unfolded the parchment.

He wrote the letter, twice.

Then he lowered the letter, and looked back at us.

'He says he is ok.' Dumbledore said after a few moments of intense silences.

'What does he say else? How do you mean ok?' Molly Weasley asked him.

'He only says he's ok. Nothing less and nothing more.' I could hear a disappointment in the professors voice.

'Well, then we don't need to go after all.' I said. Mayby a bit to happy, lots to happy...

Every bodies head turned to me.

'Why shouldn't we go?' Alasor Moody's grumbled voice rose above the silence.

'Because he's ok.' I shot back to him.

'Well that's because he didn't say more then two words.' Molly said, immediately other people started to whisper.

'Silence please.' Dumbledore spook after a few minutes. I hadn't said anything.

'Why have you suggested that we shouldn't go Lupin?' He asked me.

And before I could kick myself I answered: 'We need to show trust in him. Like Sirius did when he was still here...'

'I think that's it will be best of you went to get him Remus. Today.'

Now I really could kick Dumbledore in the ass.

'No.'

'Go, and get Harry out of there.'

'And then? How am I supposed to take care of him?'

'Bring him to your home. There the both of you will stay the rest of the holidays.' I could swear that I saw Dumbledore's eyes twinkle.

'And what if I won't.'

'Remus.' Molly said in shock.

'Molly, please.' Arthur said then again, in shock of his wife.

'Remus, I believe it's better that you go now.'

I knew I was defieded. I grapped my coat, and went out.