Disclaimer: I don't own anything OC related.

AN: A twisted hiatus story. What if...

"…I did a perfect imitation of someone who's alive
before I met you
now colors seem to have a taste and a temperature
and everything doesn't seem so far away…"

--7 Mary 3

"I'm going out, Hailey. Bye." Marissa slammed the door behind her.

"Fucking brat," She muttered.

Jimmy was working late again. Sandy had actually found him a job, a good job, and she was genuinely happy for him. He had been devastated when Marissa had moved out and she had eagerly accepted his offer to move in with him. One month in, he got the job. Two months in, Marissa moved back.

Now, 3 months after her first ever attempt at domestication, she was miserable.

She loved Jimmy, she really did, but seeing him crawl into bed at midnight and leave before she woke up wasn't her idea of bliss.

And Marissa was a handful. She cursed herself every night when she'd hear Marissa puking up alcohol-scented bile. Hailey had been a wild one, she'd always resented Kirsten for being such a 'goody' but seeing Marissa, partying but still unhappy, she regretted everything.

And Jimmy was clueless when it came to his daughter. He considered sporadic phone calls as supervision. Hailey wasn't the girl's mother. She'd told Jimmy the little that she knew, that Marissa was drinking, that she'd quit therapy, that she was dating at least 3 different guys but Jimmy said that it was fine. He trusted his daughter.

Hailey would visit her sister often. Kirsten would always be a step above her. It was like Kirsten had gotten everything good from their parents and she got what was leftover.

But she loved Kirsten more than anyone else. And she hated seeing her in pain. Kirsten's only son had run away for a couple of weeks after their father's wedding. But it was her foster son, Ryan, who was the ultimate source of her pain. Kirsten was upset over Seth's return, she hadn't forgiven him for leaving, and she was worried about Ryan.

She knew that her sister was right to worry. The kid was carrying the world on his shoulders. He was working 2 jobs, taking care of his pregnant ex-girlfriend and making regular visits to Kirsten and the Cohens.

Hailey couldn't help her so she spent time with her when she could. Kirsten worked from home now. She remained upbeat and cheerful in front of Sandy and Seth and rarely allowed her pain to show. She had only recently started talking to Hailey about it.

There was a knock on the door. Hailey got up and opened it.

"Hey, Hailey."

"Ryan. You look like hell."

"Thanks. Marissa home?" He asked dryly. His voice was low and gravelly, like he hadn't used it in days.

Hailey was startled. Not because he was there, he came by every few weeks but because he looked so exhausted. Marissa was never home when he'd stop by. She'd like to punch the little twit in the face for leading Ryan on.

"I'm sorry, Ryan, you just missed her."

"Oh," He whispered, a confused look on his face.

"Did she know you were coming?"

"Yeah. She called me," He replied without thinking.

Hailey sighed. He'd come all this way for Marissa.

"Well, tell her I came by," He muttered, turning with his shoulders slouched with exhaustion.

"You can come in. Take a break," Hailey offered.

Ryan raised an eyebrow. He looked old. Tired. Used. He looked like she felt. "I should get back," He said.

"Come in, Ryan. Kirsten would never forgive me if I didn't make you sit down."

"You don't have to be nice to me, Hailey," He said, amused. "Bye."

She grabbed his arm. "Please, I need the company."

He gave her a tired smile. "Okay."

"Thank you," She grinned. She wasn't sure why she felt the need to invite him in. From what she knew of him, he didn't talk much but she could use the company and he was nice to look at. He'd bulked up in his new jobs. She shook off her thought. She'd just give the kid a cool drink and a break from thinking about that little brat of Jimmy's.

She sat down at the table and lit a cigarette.

"You smoke?" He asked, sitting down heavily across from her.

"When Jimmy's not here. Which is a lot," She replied.

"Mind?" He murmured as he lit a cigarette from his own. She watched as he relaxed as he took a lazy drag off the cigarette and let the smoke drift from his nostrils as he trained his blue gaze on him.

"Kirsten would kill us."

"I won't tell," He replied.

Something told her it was true. There were a lot of things Ryan wouldn't tell.

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He'd been there 2 hours before she kissed him. Something had been building in the apartment as they'd talked. Hailey was more mature. She'd finally decided to accept her place in her family and be a grown up. She was wiser. He'd felt something with her. They had a connection. The air was thick.

And he'd talked to her. Told her how Seth resented him for Kirsten's anger. How Teresa wanted his love and commitment and he couldn't touch her. How Marissa enjoyed making him hurt.

And she'd talked to him. Told her how Jimmy sometimes said Kirsten's name in bed. How her boss at the restaurant kept feeling her up. How Kirsten resented her for Caleb's favoritism.

She'd kissed him impulsively, leaning across the table. She needed to see if that glint in his eyes was innocence or experience. His tongue probed into her mouth and she knew he tasted her need. He tasted like smoke and sex.

She moaned into his mouth but had her hands on his head so he couldn't pull away. It had been so long since she'd had a partner that could make her feel what she was feeling now.

"Ryan…" She whispered when he finally turned away, gasping for air. "I'm sorry…"

He was stricken. "Are you?" He asked in his breathless voice. His blue eyes were dark with conflicting emotions.

"Not really," She answered after a beat. She stood up and looked down at him. "So let's think about this…"

"No," Ryan said. "This is just wrong…"

Hailey knew he was right. The fact that he was turning her down drove home how mature she was. But it made him want her more.

"We're insignificant in the general scheme of things. No one will know. And we can have a few minutes of mindless fun and still walk away clean," She said.

"Hailey…" He shook his head.

"No strings." She sat down in his lap and kissed him. He didn't pull away. He needed this, too.

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