Raise me up from my ashes...
I spent what seemed like an eternity in that ominously silent waiting room; broken occasionally by the sound of pacing feet or the wracking sobs that came from those who had probably just recieved a message that no one wanted to take, much less believe. I sat there on that cold plastic chair that seemed to be miles and miles away from another living soul, clutching the edges of it like one who was desperately holding onto a life raft. Where was Jet? Why was he taking his sweet time getting here? Was he procrastinating to make me worry? I clenched my teeth and held back a scream of frustration, my eyes moving wildly around the room as I fought to retain my sanity. It felt so claustophobic...So small...So sad and desolate. Calm down, Faye...Calm down...You don't want them to stab you with one of those disgustingly long needles and put you away do you?
I heard footsteps again and my head shot up, just far enough to see familiar looking boots. A smile was slipping away from my trembling lips as I dared a peak up through the veil of hair that obscured my face, a bit annoying, really. There he was...Jet. God, I never thought I'd ever be so happy to see that scarred and serious face of his. I shot out of my chair and before I know what my arms were doing they were around Jet and hugging him so fiercely that his voice sounded a bit tight as he spoke,
"Faye, it's alright..." That voice! The masculine gruff, rumble of it washed over me in soothing waves and I only hugged him tighter...He finally gave up and I felt his brawny arms wrap around me in a slow, unsure way. He was solid as rock...Like a slab of granite that had been slowly weathered...Rough around the edges but a softer core within.
"Jet...I'm scared." I whispered into the crook of his neck. Something I had never admitted to someone and now that it had escaped my lips I felt my fear and despise for myself arise within me like bile in the back of your throat when you know you're going to puke. I felt my nails digging into my palms and removed myself from him as I unclenched my fists I saw angry red half-moons etched into my skin as I took a shuddering breath and looked up at him.
"It's okay, Faye. Spike will be alright." He said easily as he dropped down in a seat beside me, motioning me to sit.
"But am I going to be alright? I...I remember so many horrible things, Jet...And I--I saw what Spike saw. I saw it in his eyes...You don't understand..." I suppose to him I didn't make any sense because Jet was wearing that look that guys get when they try to look intelligent but have no idea in hell what you are saying. I felt my old self rising up and I waved my hand impatiently, feeling the air push upon, and push away from it.
"Never mind...Forget it."
"Faye, get some sleep...We'll be here awhile." Jet said suddenly as a change of subject and I nodded and curled up with my head resting against his shoulder as I slowly closed my eyes and listened to the drone of the computers that illuminated the bespectacled techies as they registered their patients. Finally the sounds of the hospital seemed to drift away from me as I fell back into the black stretches of unconsciousness. A world of darkness behind my eyelids. ---- "He's lost a lot of blood, doctor...Do you think we can still save him?"
"Of course! We just need to give him blood transfusions...Simple as that!"
"But don't we need to remove all of those bullets?"
"Yes, yes...Those will be no problem b--"
"Some of them are really deep..."
"Who is the doctor here and who is the nurse?"
"Right...Sorry, sir." ---- I was dimly aware of voices talking in the background as I slowly came back to consciousness, I opened my eyes only a little and stirred until I could see the doctor and Jet conversing over a clipboard. Silently I stood and stole closer to them, standing directly behind Jet I listened in, suprisingly unheard.
"Mr. Spiegel has been moved out of intensive care and is now in room 264...You and Mrs. Spiegel are now allowed to visit him but keep quiet will you?"
"Thanks...Bye!" Grabbing Jet's arm she led him to the elevator. Avoiding the look of stupefication on his face until the large, powerful doors shut behind us I just fiddled with my fingernails.
"Mrs...Spiegel?" He said incredulously as he glanced over at me, making my gaze turn to meet his I shrugged nonchalantly and said,
"They only allow family members to visit and that was the first thing that popped out of my mouth."
He still looked suspicious of me and I rolled my eyes in annoyance; elbowing him in the ribs, satisfied as a grunt of pain was drawn involuntarily forth from him. I swear...Men have absolutely no tact and even when they do have some they usually ruin it by telling the truth. That is why women are superior, I tell you!! None of you listen to Jet's side of the story; he is wrong! Sorry...Moment of hysteria.
Jet and I walked down the long quiet halls, listening to the soft moans that emitted from almost every room we passed...I was starting to get impatient now but Jet...He was just walking along with a bounce in his step and I half-expected him to start whistling. Thank God he never had time to because he almost got clothes-lined by a harried nurse followed by a family that were screaming bloody murder. The lady had a nice set of pipes...Ech.
Finally Jet clamped his hand around my arm and pulled me to a stop; the big lug almost made me fall on my butt. But when I turned my head to yell at him he wore a grim expression as he silently gestured towards the door...264. Jet put his hand on the door and pulled it down...I don't know why but suddenly I felt very nervous...Afraid of what I'd find beyond that door. The door slid open and silence hit my hard and for a second I couldn't breath, but I felt my feet moving, carrying me in. Spike was on the bed, silent and still...He looked like a mummy with all of those bandages on but for once I wasn't going to laugh. I'd seen him like this before...But now it wasn't funny.
Quietly I came to sit upon his bed and I looked down at his face, all I could see were his eyes and they were closed. For a moment I thought that he was dead but the steady beat of the heart monitor told me that he indeed, was alive. Jet sat in a seat and looked out the window. Refusing to speak. I mustered a smile and began to sing softly to him, to Spike,
"Raise me up from my ashes... Make me breath again Let me be as I've never been My phoenix, my own
Erase all of the unhappy memories That haunt my head Give me love as I've never loved My phoenix, my own
Raise me up from my ashes... Give breath in which to breathe But don't give me back my memories My curses, all erased..."
I saw a small tear drop adorning his lashes and I bent down, kissing the tear away. As I leaned back he opened his eyes and a small murmur escaped from him. The bandages covering it muffled it and I had to lean closer to hear:
"Don't stop singing..."
Jet watched in silence...I could feel his gaze boring into my back but I would keep singing to him anyway.
"Raise me up from my ashes..."
Ganymene Ballad:Don't Stop the Music
-----Author's Note----So, how'd ya like it? Kinda depressing, ne? I was listening to Smashing Pumpkins and their Adore CD...Gets me in a mood and moods get me to writing. This one's been a long time coming like the chapter two but don't worry. I wrote it didn't I? Now you can review away and tell me how much you hate it. Oh and by the way...Shin shall come back! No worries...But I'm going to use him in the later chapters.
I spent what seemed like an eternity in that ominously silent waiting room; broken occasionally by the sound of pacing feet or the wracking sobs that came from those who had probably just recieved a message that no one wanted to take, much less believe. I sat there on that cold plastic chair that seemed to be miles and miles away from another living soul, clutching the edges of it like one who was desperately holding onto a life raft. Where was Jet? Why was he taking his sweet time getting here? Was he procrastinating to make me worry? I clenched my teeth and held back a scream of frustration, my eyes moving wildly around the room as I fought to retain my sanity. It felt so claustophobic...So small...So sad and desolate. Calm down, Faye...Calm down...You don't want them to stab you with one of those disgustingly long needles and put you away do you?
I heard footsteps again and my head shot up, just far enough to see familiar looking boots. A smile was slipping away from my trembling lips as I dared a peak up through the veil of hair that obscured my face, a bit annoying, really. There he was...Jet. God, I never thought I'd ever be so happy to see that scarred and serious face of his. I shot out of my chair and before I know what my arms were doing they were around Jet and hugging him so fiercely that his voice sounded a bit tight as he spoke,
"Faye, it's alright..." That voice! The masculine gruff, rumble of it washed over me in soothing waves and I only hugged him tighter...He finally gave up and I felt his brawny arms wrap around me in a slow, unsure way. He was solid as rock...Like a slab of granite that had been slowly weathered...Rough around the edges but a softer core within.
"Jet...I'm scared." I whispered into the crook of his neck. Something I had never admitted to someone and now that it had escaped my lips I felt my fear and despise for myself arise within me like bile in the back of your throat when you know you're going to puke. I felt my nails digging into my palms and removed myself from him as I unclenched my fists I saw angry red half-moons etched into my skin as I took a shuddering breath and looked up at him.
"It's okay, Faye. Spike will be alright." He said easily as he dropped down in a seat beside me, motioning me to sit.
"But am I going to be alright? I...I remember so many horrible things, Jet...And I--I saw what Spike saw. I saw it in his eyes...You don't understand..." I suppose to him I didn't make any sense because Jet was wearing that look that guys get when they try to look intelligent but have no idea in hell what you are saying. I felt my old self rising up and I waved my hand impatiently, feeling the air push upon, and push away from it.
"Never mind...Forget it."
"Faye, get some sleep...We'll be here awhile." Jet said suddenly as a change of subject and I nodded and curled up with my head resting against his shoulder as I slowly closed my eyes and listened to the drone of the computers that illuminated the bespectacled techies as they registered their patients. Finally the sounds of the hospital seemed to drift away from me as I fell back into the black stretches of unconsciousness. A world of darkness behind my eyelids. ---- "He's lost a lot of blood, doctor...Do you think we can still save him?"
"Of course! We just need to give him blood transfusions...Simple as that!"
"But don't we need to remove all of those bullets?"
"Yes, yes...Those will be no problem b--"
"Some of them are really deep..."
"Who is the doctor here and who is the nurse?"
"Right...Sorry, sir." ---- I was dimly aware of voices talking in the background as I slowly came back to consciousness, I opened my eyes only a little and stirred until I could see the doctor and Jet conversing over a clipboard. Silently I stood and stole closer to them, standing directly behind Jet I listened in, suprisingly unheard.
"Mr. Spiegel has been moved out of intensive care and is now in room 264...You and Mrs. Spiegel are now allowed to visit him but keep quiet will you?"
"Thanks...Bye!" Grabbing Jet's arm she led him to the elevator. Avoiding the look of stupefication on his face until the large, powerful doors shut behind us I just fiddled with my fingernails.
"Mrs...Spiegel?" He said incredulously as he glanced over at me, making my gaze turn to meet his I shrugged nonchalantly and said,
"They only allow family members to visit and that was the first thing that popped out of my mouth."
He still looked suspicious of me and I rolled my eyes in annoyance; elbowing him in the ribs, satisfied as a grunt of pain was drawn involuntarily forth from him. I swear...Men have absolutely no tact and even when they do have some they usually ruin it by telling the truth. That is why women are superior, I tell you!! None of you listen to Jet's side of the story; he is wrong! Sorry...Moment of hysteria.
Jet and I walked down the long quiet halls, listening to the soft moans that emitted from almost every room we passed...I was starting to get impatient now but Jet...He was just walking along with a bounce in his step and I half-expected him to start whistling. Thank God he never had time to because he almost got clothes-lined by a harried nurse followed by a family that were screaming bloody murder. The lady had a nice set of pipes...Ech.
Finally Jet clamped his hand around my arm and pulled me to a stop; the big lug almost made me fall on my butt. But when I turned my head to yell at him he wore a grim expression as he silently gestured towards the door...264. Jet put his hand on the door and pulled it down...I don't know why but suddenly I felt very nervous...Afraid of what I'd find beyond that door. The door slid open and silence hit my hard and for a second I couldn't breath, but I felt my feet moving, carrying me in. Spike was on the bed, silent and still...He looked like a mummy with all of those bandages on but for once I wasn't going to laugh. I'd seen him like this before...But now it wasn't funny.
Quietly I came to sit upon his bed and I looked down at his face, all I could see were his eyes and they were closed. For a moment I thought that he was dead but the steady beat of the heart monitor told me that he indeed, was alive. Jet sat in a seat and looked out the window. Refusing to speak. I mustered a smile and began to sing softly to him, to Spike,
"Raise me up from my ashes... Make me breath again Let me be as I've never been My phoenix, my own
Erase all of the unhappy memories That haunt my head Give me love as I've never loved My phoenix, my own
Raise me up from my ashes... Give breath in which to breathe But don't give me back my memories My curses, all erased..."
I saw a small tear drop adorning his lashes and I bent down, kissing the tear away. As I leaned back he opened his eyes and a small murmur escaped from him. The bandages covering it muffled it and I had to lean closer to hear:
"Don't stop singing..."
Jet watched in silence...I could feel his gaze boring into my back but I would keep singing to him anyway.
"Raise me up from my ashes..."
Ganymene Ballad:Don't Stop the Music
-----Author's Note----So, how'd ya like it? Kinda depressing, ne? I was listening to Smashing Pumpkins and their Adore CD...Gets me in a mood and moods get me to writing. This one's been a long time coming like the chapter two but don't worry. I wrote it didn't I? Now you can review away and tell me how much you hate it. Oh and by the way...Shin shall come back! No worries...But I'm going to use him in the later chapters.