Harry Potter Nickname Poem
Listen up, my fiction friends
And let me explain something to you
When you begin to write Harry Potter
There are some things you must not do
The characters are nice, the way they were made
So don't change a thing about them – especially their names
You've all seen it once, I'm sure
Twice if you've read more
But these ridiculous nicknames,
Should be tossed right out the door,
And as you read this poem
Makes notes on what you read
Because the names should remain
As they first started out to be
Remus is called a lot of things
Some are really strange to me
Some people call him 'Moonshine'
But others stick with Just 'Re'
Some of you might think it's cute
But me I look and laugh
Because his name is Remus,
Not 'Remy' ! Are you daft?
Sirius gets a lot of names
And none from his daddy ,
I've seen writers call him Siri
Not to mention Paddy
"But Teagan, It's just sooo cute! "
This they say to me
I just look at them and say
"Leave them as they be!"
This may seem dumb
But I saw it once before
Calling Harry , 'Har'
Please don't make me say any more
His name is Harry
Not Har, I don't get it, I just don't
And if you call him anything but that
I'll shove it down your throat
You think 'Har' is pretty bad?
Well, here's the one that wins the sash
Ron being called 'Ronnie'
I've seen it in both het and slash
Maybe it's funny
But you won't see me laugh
Ron is just Ron!
Can't we leave it at just that?
But all these names do not compare
To the one that is the worst
Even just when I think about it
It makes me want to burst
Severus Snape is called 'Sev' in many fics
And even though I read them
It makes me really sick
He's evil and he's mean
But yet they dare to change
The name that makes him who he is
Up to this very day
I can't take it anymore!
I can't stand these HP Nicknames!
No more shall people get away
With placing characters with such shame!
So , Next time you sit down and write
Remember this poem
Harry Potter names are great
So just leave them alone.
-Fin-