Family Reunion
 Part III

-

I hid behind the door, hoping to stay "out of sight, out of mind".

Unfortunately for me, my oldest, Erin, came back from washing up after dinner. She always seemed to take the longest out of all of my family, and not because of her being a preteen. In fact, she was nothing like the other girls her age (which was twelve). She didn't like to dress up, or play little girl games. She didn't even like acting like a lady. She did so only when reminded. She much preferred to sit and read. This was why she took so long getting cleaned up. Actually, that's why she takes so long to do anything. She just can't seem to put her books down. She got great grades, but had few.... well, no friends.

She came back just as I settled in my chosen hiding spot. She just walked right past me, uttering a soft "Hello, Father." Unlucky for me, that soft greeting snapped my wife out of her shock. I swear I could feel her eyes burning a hole through the door and into my back.

It was Jack who spoke however. "Ye can come out now, mate. I don' know 'er as well as you do, I'm sure," At that part I could almost hear the steam rising from my wife's head, "bu' I don' think she bites. Unless tha's wha' yer into." I heard a bout of giggles coming from the pair of girls in the drawing room. How did they know about such profane things? Ana was only ten. And Lily was only seven!

I stepped out of my position behind the door, about to give them a scolding to match even my wife's, when my wife joined them. The giggles soon became laughter. And soon after that the three ladies (who, at the moment, were acting like anything but) fell to their knees in laughter. I have no clue what was so funny. I mean seriously, how would my liking (or not liking as it were) being bitten by my wife, be amusing?

Even being married for twenty-two years, and having three girls, I'll never understand them.

At least I wasn't alone with my confusion. Jack and Erin were as befuddled as I was. Jack showed a brief frown of confusion before repositioning his cocky grin. Erin just looked up from her book for a moment, giving her mother and sisters an angry scowl before returning to her reading.

Jack looked at my oldest intently. She glanced up from her book and gave him an odd expression. "Do you mind? You are distracting me from my reading with your adverse affect upon my siblings and parental beings. I suggest that you vacate the immediate area before I am forced, through aggravation, to cause harm to your physical being."

A brief expression of bemusement crossed his features before he answered. "If'n ye mind, d'ye think that ye can give me that li'l speech again? in English this time. An' perhaps a name t' go wi' tha' pretty li'l face."

She sighed deeply. If it were anyone else I'd have said exaggeratedly. But this was Erin. She never did anything exaggeratedly, not even her ridiculously overly thought out speech. "If you must know, the nomenclature that my parental figures gave me is Erin. And as for what I just said, I was speaking English the first time. 'Tis not my fault if you have the intelligence of a foul beast. That being the case, at least your abhorrent appearance and olfactory assault are well matched by your witless mentality."

As much as I would have enjoyed watching my brother get outspoken by a twelve-year-old, I decided that now was about time to step in. At least the other three's laughter had faded, and now everyone in the room was lookin at them expectantly. "As amusing as your banter is, I think it's about time we all sat down and got to know each other. Don't you?"

Both of them looked at me as if I were insane. "Surly, Father, you do not expect me to sit near such a simple minded, addlebrained, creature, do you?" She followed us as we all walked to the sitting area. Jack took the centre of the couch. Erin sat the farthest away from him as she could. The rest of the family filled in between. My other three children (not including the baby of course), sat as close to Jack as they could. My wife returned to the seat she was waiting for us in. And I sat between Jeff (who was beside Lily, who was beside Jack) and Erin. I figured I'd give her some extra room between her and Jack before she found out that that "simple minded, addlebrained, creature" was her uncle.

As they each introduced themselves in turn to their uncle, I just sat and waited for Erin to find out. Why? cause I knew that when she did, all hell was going to break loose.