Chapter 4
Just as Alan had begun to doze off he realised they were descending back towards the ground. He looked around and John Hammond was staring rightat him his nose about 2 cms away from Alans.
"What the hell?" Alan questioned
"Well hello stranger. Want to talk about something?" Hammond said in a girly voice. Alan shuddered as he remembered that's just how his mother used to speak.
"Why in God's name are we descending? We haven't been on this plane for 48 hours! I should I've been counting. And another thing why is there no in-flight movie? I wanna watch a documentary on dinosaurs."
Well we are descending because we are picking up another passenger, Malcolm Ian. Also because I need to pick up my dry cleaning." Johs eyes were now extremely shifty at this point.
Alan suddenly made a mental note in his head, Never talk to this man again! Alan saw his little darling, Sparky waking up and Alan wandered over to him.
"Sparky are you ok? Did you have a good sleep? Do you need some more peanuts?"
"Spark-EY wuv Alan, Spark-EY wants peanuts." Said Sparky in a sleepy dream voice
Alan smiled and squeaked with pleasure. This was the sort of thing he had been dreaming of. But before he could think more kinky fantasies they had landed on the runaway to await a small, ugly looking man, who looked like a dinosaur hater. It was Malcolm.
"Hallo, Grant."
"Hi Ian, I mean Malcolm, I mean, sorry what's your last name again????"
"I have no idea. People just call me Patrick."
"Ok Patrick. Hi."
"Hi"
During this stimulating converation, Sparky had sneaked over to Patrick. He pounced and bit off his hand.
"Yummy!!!! Spark-EY yummy hand!!!!"
"Hehe, that tickled!!!!" Patrick giggled.
Ellie and John came running over concerned.
"Ian!!!! Or Malcolm, or-"
"It's Patrick"
"Patrick didn't that hurt????"
"No, I became addicted to painkillers after I tried to commit suicide after my 13th divorce, and I got fired from my job as I lost half my brain in a boating accident."
Alan blinked. "Well aren't you just a lump of sunshine."
Patrick smiled at Alan.
"Yes, I suppose I am" And he started gnawing on his other wrist, as Sparky played with his hand.