Midnight in the Common Room of Good and Evil

(I do not own Harry Potter)

Ron was very tired. It had been a hard day, and he was just sitting in a chair, his divination homework laid out in front of him, falling asleep. "Ron, wake up." Harry's voice rang out in his head. He looked up at Harry, red eyed and yawning. Harry smiled. "It's twelve midnight. Let's go to bed." He said as he put his things away. Ron gave another yawn.

"Okay, just let me put my things away." He said in a tired voice. Harry walked over to the stairs and looked back at Ron.

"Okay. Don't fall asleep down here." He laughed and walked up to the boy's dormitories. Ron put his things in his bag and stood up. He began to walk over to the stairs, bag over shoulder, when he looked down and saw his shoelace was untied.

"How did you get out of place?" He asked his shoelace and sat down on the softest couch in the common room. He bent over and tied his shoe. He sat up and gave a huge yawn. 'I'll just lie down for a second.' He thought and laid his head on the arm of the couch and closed his eyes. It was no time before he had fallen to sleep.

Ron woke and looked up at the ceiling for a few seconds. He gave a small scream when he saw Neville float by above him. "How did you get up there?" Ron said and sat up, still looking upward.

"Hermione used her air machine and blew me up." Neville said cheerfully as he floated by. "I hope you win today." Ron looked at him in a most puzzled way.

"What are you talking about?" He asked the floating boy. Neville grabbed a chandelier so he would stop drifting.

"When you play Slytherin, silly." Neville said with a small laugh. "It's too bad though." He let go of the chandelier and floated down a bit toward Ron.

"What's too bad?" Ron asked. What was going on? Ron got up, still looking upward and walked so that he was directly under Neville.

"That Harry and the rest of the team can't play." Neville said with a frown. Ron frowned too. "Yeah." Neville continued. "Harry can't play because of his hang nail and the others are just too tired." Neville floated over to the window. He opened it and looked back to Ron. "I guess I had better be leaving. Hermione said that my air would only last a couple of hours, if I want to be the first Longbottom on the moon, than I had better get moving." With that, Neville went out of the window. Ron ran over to the window and looked out and upward. He could see Neville floating upward and upward, until he was out of sight.

"This place is going nuts." Ron said and he pulled his head back into the common room. "Am I even at Hogwarts anymore?" Just then, Hermione and Harry walked in, Harry's left hand rapped in several layers of bandages and a nurse was walking behind him. Hermione was holding a large metal tank. "What is going on?" Ron asked them. Hermione looked puzzled.

"I'm trying to air up every person at Hogwarts, can't you tell that?" Then Dean Thomas walked in and without a word Hermione shoved a rubber hose in his mouth and turned a switch on her tank. Dean began to swell up with air. "Just inhale until you think you're full." Hermione said to him. He never said if he was full, however. A few minutes went by and he just kept getting bigger and bigger.

"Maybe you should take the hose out of his mouth, Hermione." Ron suggested and took a small step back away from, the now beach ball sized, Dean Thomas.

"Oh, he'll be fine." Hermione said. Just then, however, Dean exploded. Miniature versions of him went flying everywhere. They slammed into the walls and landed on tables. A few went into vases and a couple of glasses that were lying around. Ron dove under a table to prevent himself from being pelted by the little Deans. Hermione got a smile on her face. "Oops. I guess you were right Ron. That's the second time that's happened today." Ron came out from under the table and looked at her as if she were crazy. She leaned in his direction and whispered, "If you see any small Ginny's running around, don't step on them. I'm still trying to work out how to put them together again." She looked across the room and saw Seamus walking down the stairs. "Seamus, come here." She said and quickly walked in his direction. Seamus gave a small girly scream and ran back up the stairs. Hermione gave chase. Ron heard a door slam and a few screams. Then silence. He looked at Harry.

"So, what's wrong with your hand?" He asked. Harry gave a huge sigh and sat down, the nurse that was with him put a pillow behind his head and he leaned back.

"Hang nail." He answered simply. "I'm afraid I can't play the Quidditch game today. Neither can the others. You'll have to take on the whole Slytherin team by yourself." Harry winced and grabbed his hand. The nurse quickly pulled out a bottle of water and poured it over Ron's head. Ron gave a gasp as the cold liquid ran over his head and down his back.

"What the bloody hell did you do that for?" He asked, and pulled out his wand and dried himself. Just as soon as he did this, however the nurse poured more water over his head. This happened several times before Ron screamed and punched the woman dead in the face. She fell backward over the couch and did not move. Ron looked shocked at himself.

"Why did you do that?" Harry asked. She was just doing what would make my hand stop hurting."

"By pouring water over my head?" Ron said as he dried himself one final time.

"Yes." Harry said. "Now how am I going to get my hand to stop hurting?" With that, Harry stomped out of the room and slammed the portrait behind him. Ron sat down and sighed.

"I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone." He said and rubbed his face. Then he heard a huge explosion. A few minutes later Hermione came walking back down the stairs. She looked at Ron and walked over to the portrait hole, and opened it. Just before leaving, she looked at Ron. "Oops." She said and walked through. Ron just stared at the portrait hole after it closed. "What in the name of my butt is going on around here?" He asked aloud to himself. Just then, Draco walked in and he had his entire Quidditch team with him.

"Well Ron, are you ready?" He asked with a sneer on his lips. "Come on, I don't have all bloody day." He said as he and his team mounted their brooms. Ron's mouth fell open. He was about to object for several reasons when suddenly his broom was in his hand and there were two sets of goals set up at either end of the common room. He just looked up at Draco. "Weasley, would you hurry up? My dad has to meet with Voldemorte in order to plan for Harry's demise. Get a move on." Draco said impatiently. Ron slowly mounted his broom and flew up to defend his goal posts. When he got in position, he turned around and saw something that made his eyes get as big as dinner plates. Draco was laughing and he and his entire team were holding a huge quaffle. It was about twenty feet around and looked as if it weighed at least a ton. "Ready Weasley?" Draco asked.

"Well, actually Malfoy I'm late for a hair appointment and I missed the other one so I need..." Draco didn't wait for him to finish. He and the entire team threw the huge quaffle at him. Ron began to scream as the sounds of the Slytherin's laughter filled the room.

Suddenly Ron jumped upright on the couch. He looked around, breathing a little hard. He fell back to a lying position and gave a big sigh. "Thank goodness that was just a dream." He said and got up. He walked up to the boys dormitories, and got dressed and climbed into bed. He closed the drapes and was back to sleep before a minute was up, having more odd dreams.

The end

(Okay I know this is an odd one lol. I felt like just having a bit of fun.)