Eggs Benedict
Chapter Two: Victims of Circumstance
In which, Phil starts digging up some things . . . he rather would know?
It was another two weeks later. Taping continued to go well. A warm night breeze blew up from the glittering city of Anaheim as Phil and Peppermint strolled to a bench on the mountain overlook, holding hands. They each settled down and just looked out for a bit. This was their fourth date. Number four! Phil found himself in a serious mood. Was this real? Hey. She'd never been married, was allergic to dogs, loved to garden, and seemed genuine. Simple. Maybe even honest. That was rare this side of Hollywood. She loved kids and Phil didn't, but maybe they could work it out. After years of being ignored by women, suddenly he was dating, and wasn't even paying her to do it. Phil was so used to wheeling and dealing that he wasn't sure he was doing this "romancing" thing right.
"Hey, Peppermint?"
"Yeah Phil?" Peppermint's ginger-snap eyes blinked at him. Sigh. "I'm just . . . what is it you like about me?"
She smiled. "If I tell you that, then you have to tell me what you like about me."
"Of course," Phil said, putting an arm around Peppermint.
"Well," she began, "You're cute and funny-"
"Really?"
"At least to me," she said. "And you appreciate me, and I can talk to you about the business world without feeling talked down to. You know how rare that is? . . . Okay, now you."
"I uh-" Phil stopped when his watch beeped. "Not now," he grumbled, checking the time.
"What is it?"
"I-I'm afraid I need to get home, sweetheart. I have to be at the Pond early tomorrow. Something big is happening."
"It's alright Phil, don't look so down."
"I also need you to get a tape to George tomorrow. That something big is mentioned on the tape, and I realized it would be a good idea to let him in on what's happening so far."
"Why are you so worried about it? I thought you had Wildwing sign a paper promising to do your next publicity stunt."
"I did," Phil said, "But this is different. I'm not worried exactly about what it will do to the publicity stunt. Wildwing signed the written agreement; I don't think he expects anything that big. He'll be surprised I guess. You know I haven't told him yet."
Phil looked out over Anaheim, silently criticizing himself. He may have done one thing right, getting Wildwing to sign on his agreement, but he'd spent two whole weeks before he realized how he could get what Duke was up to off his conscience.
Did he have to pick when all this is going on for me to rob something? Phil thought. Does he have no sympathy? I wish I'd thought of asking George earlier. For all I know, there'd be some legal junk that wouldn't let him use the footage. There was always something like that.
"Hey," Peppermint grinned teasingly after seeing Phil's continuing worried expression. "Don't worry, those Ducks won't stand in our way forever!"
The two laughed together, albeit that Phil's laughter was mostly nervousness. He didn't appreciate irony when he was the one in the middle of it. "I'll drop ya right off at the front door." Phil said.
"It's the least you owe me for a fun night, Phil Pomfeather!" She chased Phil to the car, and Phil allowed that to also chase his worries away.
When the car drove off, all was silent and peaceful for a moment. Then, something in the underbrush snapped, and a deep red scaled saurian stepped out of the bushes. He looked like a large, overstuffed lizard. Unmistakable, seeing as no earth lizard was this big. Earth lizards didn't talk or carry blasters, either.
The Saurians had a scale to pick with the ducks. Centuries ago, when the saurian race had been a large and powerful empire, the Saurians had had the ducks as their slaves. Then, a duck by the horrid name of Drake DuCaine had sent them all to a place called "dimensional limbo," destroying their empire. To this day, only one saurian had escaped, with three henchmen, by use of a gateway generator. They had been so close to conquering the galaxy after their escape, when a team of seven ducks had forced them to crash-land on this planet called earth. Now, Dragaunus and his three companions could only struggle to defeat the ducks and regain their rightful place oppressing the people of entire planets.
And with such things on his mind, that was what this saurian was here for.
"Stupid nature," he muttered, flicking a few twigs off of his scales and blast suit. Thoughtfully he fingered his energy rifle as he watched the car of the two humans vanish around a bend. Then he hit his comm, and the image of another saurian appeared.
"Yes, Siege?" the he asked.
"Lord Dragaunus," Siege began, "The two have gone."
"What do you mean gone? You were supposed to capture them both." Smoke came from Dragaunus's nostrils. "There better be a good reason why you didn't carry out my orders."
Siege was quick to attempt to placate his lord. This was a good idea, really evil, and Dragaunus would like it. "Well, I overheard them talking, and the manager was saying he had to be at the Pond early tomorrow, because something was happening."
"Really? What?" Dragaunus sounded almost annoyed, which meant he probably was annoyed. He would have to carefully win Dragaunus over now.
"That's what I couldn't find out. They left too soon." Siege said, with a cringe that he covered over well.
"And that's all? You wreck my plan on purpose for that? Get back to the Raptor at once, so I can pound you flat!"
"Now hold on, Lord Dragaunus," Siege said, "What if the ducks got suspicious because the manager Phil was supposed to be there and wasn't? Then having those humans might help the ducks find us. They probably have him bugged." He walked towards the bench where Phil and Peppermint had sat. He bent and picked up a delicate bracelet, then held it up so Dragaunus could see. "Check this out." Siege said.
Dragaunus's expression remained flat. "It's a piece of worthless jewelry."
"Not just any piece of jewelry, lord. This belongs to the other human that Pomfeather seems so fond of. I saw it drop off her wrist."
Dragaunus was frustrated. "Your point, please?"
"She'll want to come back for it, Pomfeather gave it to her," Siege read the words on the inside of the bracelet. "'For Pepper, smooches and love, Phil.'"
"I see." A pause. "What horrible mush."
"If she comes back for it, she'll probably be alone. If only she disappears, the ducks won't conclude as fast that we're behind it. I doubt she's bugged. That will give us time to find out what she knows about the ducks, and to formulate a ransom notice. So the rest of your plan can go forward all the same."
"Yes . . . excellent." Dragaunus said. "I've changed my mind. Good work, Siege. I'm sending along the Chameleon with your breakfast for tomorrow. Wait there until she returns, then bring her to the Raptor."
"As you wish, my lord," Siege said, shutting the connection off. Chameleon was coming? This was gonna be one long night.
Phil rubbed his eyes, then blinked and flexed his eyebrows. It was still dark. The morning air in his apartment was damp and cool, reflecting the atmosphere outside. It had been raining since he got up. Though the rain was needed, Phil didn't like it. It came in the apartment window that was stuck open. It made his gel run. Once it had even shorted out his cell phone.
Phil started as his cell phone rang. "Hello?" Phil tried to suppress a yawn.
"Hi Phil, it's Peppermint."
"Hey! How's it going?"
"I know you need to be at the Pond soon, but you know the bracelet you gave me? I can't find it. I just realized I wore it to the restaurant but it wasn't on my wrist when I got home. Could you check your car?"
"Sure, I was heading that direction," Phil said, "I can look for it right now." Hastily pouring his cereal down the garbage disposal and snapping a lid on his coffee, he shoved all the papers he needed for the day into his briefcase, grabbed a flashlight, and left his apartment.
Ten minutes later, a thorough search of his car found nothing except a moldy doughnut. "Do you want me to go search the overlook?" Phil said.
"No, that's okay Phil," Peppermint answered, "I'll just drive there on my way to work."
"Then I'll look in the restaurant," he said.
"That's alright Phil, I'm going by that place too."
"Oh. . . . I see. Well I'll get going then."
"That's my man. Have a good day at work. Take some juicy shots."
"Sure thing. Call me if you don't find it."
"Alright, bye Phil."
"Hold it! You giving that tape to George? Tell him to call me after he sees it."
"Okay, it's in the back of my car! Later!" She hung up. Phil buckled himself in his car and turned the radio on. "Man, that bracelet looked really good on her," he said, then frowned. "And it cost me fifty bucks to get it engraved, too!"
Peppermint was frustrated and wet when she got out of the car at the overlook. The nerve of some people, driving by so fast that she got drenched in front of the restaurant.
She jerked the keys out of the ignition and got out, wobbling a little in her high heels on the muddy and rock-paved ground. She paused to open her umbrella and stare at a truck stopped at the side of the road. Then, she trudged to the bench where the mud was even worse, looking for anything golden. At a heavy squelching sound, she turned to see a middle-aged man.
"Hey, I'm really sorry to bother you an' all ma'am, but my truck's dead," he told her, jerking a thumb back at the truck. "Is there anyway you could give me a jump?" She blinked at him. "Yeah, I guess. Have you seen a bracelet anywhere around here?"
"Does it say anything?"
"Uh . . . " She blushed a little but was determined to find it. "To Pepper, smooches and love, Phil."
The man nodded with a sympathetic smile. "I saw it in the mud nearby when my truck died. I picked it up and cleaned it. It's in the truck. Come with me." The man ambled over, Peppermint following. She stood waiting while he opened the door and reached in. "Here's your bracelet," He pulled his hand back out, his voice suddenly became high and thin. "And a nice new saurian blaster."
The umbrella fell from her hands as she stepped backwards and tripped into someone. She screamed. Scaled hands clenched over her mouth. She fought, then desperately began spitting on the hands, because they were too big to bite. The hands pulled away.
"Ew, she licked me, gross!" A rough voice said. Peppermint tried to run, but the man grabbed her arm and dug his nails in.
"Going somewhere, my dear?" The man's nails became claws. Another scaled hand. Then Peppermint caught full sight of both of them.
"W-what are you things?"
Meanwhile, at the Pond Phil had just finished taping a note on his office door. "Gone on campaign trail for publicity," it read, "Be back when I get a few bites. Stay sharp! -Phil . . . Oh and if anyone sees that bracelet I got engraved, let me know. Peppermint lost it last night."
Then, he walked off to his hiding spot for another day on the job as resident spy. He'd moved since his first spot. Now he had positioned himself in what looked like an unused closet. It was also warm and smelled like dust inside, but it was bigger than his first spot. The only thing Phil didn't like was its close proximity to the ready room, where the ducks spent a lot of their time.
The ready room was the largest room in the duck's headquarters, easily several stories high and occupied by the mainframe and keyboard of the supercomputer Drake One.
Until he could find an even better (and preferably even bigger) spot, his new spot gave him more space to move around in. He'd had more than enough of cramped quarters, and he'd had to get out of them.
Settling in, Phil sipped his coffee. He flipped channels on a single screen. His set-up was becoming rather refined as he kept working at and getting tech points from the guys George had him working with. In fact, Phil was proud of his now. He could simultaneously record from all the cameras in the building, while being able to flip channels to view any one he wanted. Phil didn't have to watch it all anymore. He could let those editor people do that.
"Let's see what they're up to in the ready room. Grin should be meditating in forty-five minutes." Phil had watched Grin every once in awhile to see if he ever did anything but sit with his eyes closed when he meditated, with little luck so far. He wondered how the guy could still keep the fat off. Did ducks build muscle or something when they sat around all day?
Looking in on the Ready Room, for the most part, the team was talking. Or arguing.
"Aw, c'mon Mallory! Tell me where my Tonic Boy action figure is! It's Friday, and I need to take it to Captain Comics."
"No way Nosedive," Malloy said, arms folded and a smug look on her face.
"But you promised to tell me today."
"I promised to tell you in exactly a week and five days. It's not eight yet, which was when I promised then."
"That's not fair."
"It is too," Mallory turned to glare at him, "You're the one who got me covered in gooey eggs two weeks ago. I'm really enjoying my revenge, in fact, if you don't stop whining, I may have to keep you precious Tonic Man toy hidden longer."
Nosedive closed his mouth and gave her a threatening glare. She just struck up a conversation with Tanya. Right on time, Grin left for his room. Phil flipped the channels so he could watch him walk there. Phil's phone rang.
"Make it quick," Phil said, annoyed that someone would call him now.
"Hey Phil, it's George."
"Oh hey, hehe, sorry I'm on the job you know. What do you need?"
"Do you have any idea where your girlfriend is?"
Phil shrugged. "At work?"
"No, it's eight already, and she hasn't shown up. I have a lot of things scheduled today, and without Peppermint, I don't know where I'm supposed to be going. She's my main assistant!" George ranted. From long experience, Phil knew that this could be awhile. Phil tuned him out. Grin was in his room.
Grin sat on his pillows, but seemed unable to find a satisfactory position. With a big sigh, he stood. That's unusual, Phil thought.
Grin walked over to his closet and opened the door. He paused. "I shouldn't. I need to keep my mind clear." He put a hand to his chin. "Then again, one wouldn't hurt." He reached into the closet and pulled out a box of doughnuts.
Phil's choked on his coffee. He gawked as Grin took one from the box, ate it in two bites, then returned the box to the closet.
"Grin has a secret stash of doughnuts!" Phil said, amazed. "Maybe it's the doughnuts that build muscle then."
"What? What's that? Pomfeather, are you listening to me?" The phone yelled.
"Ahh, my karma is balanced," Grin sat on his pillows again. Phil blinked, and realized coffee was dribbling down his chin when George came in again. "Pomfeather!"
"Yeah George?" Phil said.
Suddenly, light poured into his hiding spot and a fourth voice broke in. "All right my action figure! . . . Uh, Phil, what are you doing in our closet?"
Dragaunus glared at the trembling human before him. He walked in a circle around her, thinking about all the ways she'd fit into his mad dreams of intergalactic conquest. Or perhaps just how she would fit into his mad dreams of conquering earth. She didn't take her eyes off him for a moment, but watched him with just as much defense as fear.
"What do you want with me?" Peppermint unconsciously ran her hands over the metal-plated floor. From what she'd gathered, this one was the boss, and the one's who'd grabbed her were his flunkies. The slim green one, who had fooled her into thinking he was a man, could change into different looks. He was the Chameleon. The red one, Siege, just liked blasters.
Dragaunus stopped. "You're going to help me conquer this planet."
"What? Who says?"
"The end of my friend's energy rifle here does."
Peppermint grimaced when Siege chuckled and began whacking the palm of his hand with the rifle's barrel. "Yeah," he said, "So you better behave."
"Oh boy. . . . Well. Well, you still can't make me do anything!"
A gray saurian came into the room. His bent back and gnarled features made him a menacing figure. Secondly, the older appearance at least created the illusion of deep knowledge. One could tell this knowledge had to be of evil. Peppermint leaned and inched as far away from him as she could. "Dragaunus," he said, "I have searched our guest's car, and found these things."
A pile of items fell at Dragaunus's feet. "A roadside safety kit? Insurance, papers, junk-what's this?"
Dragaunus picked up a VCR tape in a box. He turned it several ways, examining it.
"You stay away from that ta-stuff, you overgrown lizard!" Peppermint snapped as Chameleon pulled her to her feet.
"Temper, temper. Did you mean tape, my dear?"
"No."
"I think you did. And what is it about this little black tape that's so important?"
"Nothing."
Dragaunus smirked. "I don't think so." He flicked a finger at Siege. Siege walked across the room. Chameleon twisted Peppermint's arm and Siege leveled his energy rifle at her shoulder.
"It would be quite painful to have you get hurt." Peppermint bit her lip in panic. Siege moved the rifle closer and grinned at her. She bit harder. Siege waited, knowing that this was a weak human, and weak humans bent easily to your will when they were threatened.
"It's from the Pond. I don't know what's on it!"
Peppermint gasped as Chameleon let her fall to the floor. She immediately felt disgusted with herself, but she didn't se how she could have done anything else.
"Don't know? How about we see then, hmm? Here," Dragaunus handed the tape to the Chameleon, "You're the only one who knows how to work that blasted VCR."
"Oh goodie!" Chameleon giggled, dancing his way to the VCR. His head morphed into a little kid's. "We're gonna watch a movie, heyheyhey!"
"Quit being so weird," Siege said with a glare.
Chameleon rolled his eyes. "You're just jealous."
All watched attentively while the footage of Duke's telephone conversation played, with a little voice-over by Phil saying what date this meant. Once the recording cut off, there was little else on the tape, just some television show that was half taped over.
"So their old pal Duke is robbing the museum tonight, is he?" Dragaunus pondered aloud. "I don't know why, but in any case that means he'll be alone. And a lone duck is an easy target."
"What are we doing then, lord Dragaunus?"
"We'll lie in wait for him. He'll come at dark. Chameleon, and you, Wraith, can already be in place. When the duck comes, Chameleon will give the signal, and the both of you will finish his feathers. Siege and I will stand by to teleport help in if need be. As long as his little friends aren't there already, we'll have plenty of time to get out. Then that will be one less duck who has a chance of getting in our way!"
"Hm, individualized extermination." The Wraith said. "It just might work."
"Exactly," Dragaunus said. "Of course it will work."
"Then what are we doing with the human?" Wraith asked.
"Lock her in a holding cell. For now, we must prepare for tonight. I will take care of the ransom notice for her, and we'll continue that plan later. Now get to work!"
Siege didn't speak to Peppermint as he pushed her down a hallway. Peppermint was scrambling to figure out how she could escape. The ship was getting grungier and the smell of the place worsened as they walked farther inward. Wafts of acrid and wet scents coming from the air ducts made her wonder what had died, and how stable the mechanical systems in this place were. Was the air poisonous? She sure hoped not.
He stopped her. The square hole in the door before them was striped by bars. She flexed a hand and it brushed something on Siege's wrist. It was that thing he'd used to teleport her here with, she thought. Could it take her away from this place? Could she even get it off his wrist? Biting her lip again, she felt for the clasp. Maybe she shouldn't this was too risky-oh, It had come off into her hand, whatever she had brushed. She wasn't about to try to get it back on. She carefully wrapped her fingers around it, and clenched her other hand in the same way.
The door slid open, and Siege shoved her into a small room. The floor had a layer of dust.
"Have a nice day," Siege said as he shut the door. His steps faded. He didn't return, and Peppermint could have cried with relief. She looked at the device in her hand. Here was her escape, if she could figure out how to use it. Huh. Where were the buttons?
"Phil, what are you doing in our closet?" Asked a voice.
"Eh? Nosedive!" Phil jumped to his feet. George continued to talk on his end of the phone. Phil grasped around on his mental list of excuses. "I uh, I didn't think this closet was used and I uh, uhm, had a conversation that needed to be really private!"
"So you came into this closet?"
"Uh, yea-yeah!"
"Don't you have like, an office?"
"It's just not private enough! I needed someplace really, really private. Of course, thanks to you, I'm really disappointed."
Someone chuckled casually outside the doorway. "You've got your toy back, so who are you talking to in there, Dive?" Wildwing poked his head in.
"Just this human, but I don't know what he's doing here."
"Phil! Why are you in our closet?" Wildwing gave Phil a no-nonsense glare.
"A really important phone call! But it's done now; Dive here can tell you all about it." Phil shoved his way out of the closet and barely evaded Wildwing as he tried to grab him. "I gotta run babe! This may be our big break." Phil ran into the lift. Wildwing was surprised, and he didn't recover soon enough to catch Phil. The doors of the lift closed before Wildwing got there. He pounded on them in frustration.
"Weird. He just said he wanted to be sure his phone calls were really private." Nosedive snickered. "And it just so happens that Mallory was finally finished with her revenge for that stupid egg incident and told me she hid my Tonic Boy action figure in there."
"Did my eyes deceive me, or did Phil just come out of there?" Mallory walked over to the two guys.
"It was." Wildwing said. "He's hiding something, I'm sure of it. And I don't like it." Everyone looked to the Drake One as alarms began whining. Wildwing glanced at the closet.
"There's a break-in at Future Co. Chemical Plant," Mallory said.
"What timing."
Wildwing sighed to himself. The rest of the team was hurrying into the ready room. "C'mon, we'll have to check on Phil later."
There you are, chapter two, Monday, as promised! On Friday if all goes well, we shall have the twisted conclusion.
Alori: pokes g
Daniella: Duke rocks. Duke is such a James Bond! (That's what my friend said, anyway.) He'll be more in the last chapter, too. )
Lady Silver1: Thanks, that's my aim. If you catch anything or if something seems not as good as it could be, let me know. Part of this chapter got added to because my Dad, who didn't watch the series as much, felt a bit lost in parts.
Thanks everyone!