Summary: Lex contemplates his unhappy past and uncertain future when he is taken hostage in an act of revenge against the Luthors.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the lovely characters featured in Smallville—unfortunately!

I also do not own/have not written any of the lyrics or quotes which may appear as credited within this story; intended usage is merely to complement narrative and thematic elements of my original work.

A/N: This takes place somewhere in Season 1 (not very important to the story, just some minor details).

III: An Acceptable Reaction

Lana mopped at some spilled coffee on the counter of the Talon. She hadn't seen Lex since the news broke about the farms, and she found herself somewhat uneasy about seeing him today. It wasn't that Lana felt especially angry towards him, but the media were now reporting that Lex could very well get dragged into the middle of the messy controversy. She dropped the rag unceremoniously into the sink and turned back to see Lex approaching the Talon's door—right on time.

"Good morning, Lana," he said, walking up to the counter.

"Hi, Lex. Can I get you anything?"

"Actually, if you could hit me with whatever blend has the most insane amount of caffeine today, that would be great."

"Coming right up," Lana said, turning to get it for him.

"Business been OK?" Lex asked.

"Yeah, pretty regular," Lana said, pouring his coffee into a cup. "Here, I have last night's receipts for you," she remembered, setting his drink down and retrieving the wad from the cash register.

"Thanks," Lex said, taking them from her. "Lana, I know I said I was going to talk with you this morning about hiring more employees, but I can't really concentrate on it right now... is next week OK?"

"Yeah, sure," she said, noting the look of weariness on his face.

Lex nodded and seemed ready to leave, but Lana felt compelled to ask him about the current reports. "I saw the papers today," she said, making him stop. "They said they might come after you, now—to put the blame on someone."

Lex seemed characteristically unfazed by this.

"Aren't you scared?" Lana asked.

"Lana, 'scared' has never really been part of my vocabulary," Lex said with a small smile.

She looked at him dubiously. "You were never scared when you were younger."

"Funny thing is, I had more reason to be a frightened child than not, but that didn't mean anything to my father. Even when I was very small, he would never have me believe that fear was an acceptable reaction to anything."

"You mean you weren't ever supposed to let it show when you were afraid?"

He looked bemused. "Of course not."

"Well what would you do?"

Lex sipped at his coffee as he looked away for a moment, furrowing his brow as if trying to remember—or maybe to forget, Lana couldn't tell which.

"My mother and I had this system," he said finally, bringing his cup down. "We had this code worked out, so that in the event I was scared and my father was nearby, I would mention rain in one way or another—anything, like, 'It hasn't rained in a while' or 'It better not rain on Saturday.' You know, stupid things like that. I had to get pretty creative sometimes, though, just so it wouldn't sound absolutely bizarre," Lex added with a laugh.

"Did it work?"

He gave a short nod. "Most times. My mother was always there for me." Shaking his head with wonder, he murmured, "Why she married my father, I'll never know."

At the risk of sounding irrelevant, Lana couldn't resist providing some measure of empathy. "My father was never there for me, either," she offered with a timid smile.

Lex's eyes slid over to hers, and she instantly regretted the decision to speak. But his expression remained smoothly detached as he said, "At least yours had an excuse."

While more startled than outright offended by the rather blunt choice of words, Lana still didn't know quite how to respond. Lex didn't give her time to decide, however, as he turned and left her to watch him exit the Talon.

END 3/11

You've been so sad
It makes me worry
Why not smile?
You've been sad for a while

I would do anything
To hear you speak of it
Why not smile?
You've been sad for a while

~ r.e.m., "why not smile"