AN: I love FF7 (my favourite FF along with FFX-2) and I love Aeris and Tifa to death (it shows in my fanfics), but my liking of Yuffie has yet to be expressed. Well, here it is. My first Yuff fic. I was listening to 'Ikai no Shinen' (guys, you HAFTA get that song, it's on disc 2 from FFX-2 OST) and this kinda came into my head. Hope you like it. Oh yeah, visit 'www. adventchildren. net' (take out the spaces), it's got new scans of Yuffie for FF7AC, definitely a must-see. Well, tata for now. And review after you read please! I need to know if people are even reading my fics!
Who do you turn to when there's no-one left? When everyone's fallen to their knees, despair emanating like waves? Where do you go when you're cornered, trapped in your own sorrow? How do you escape something that can't be escaped, something that's trapping you from the inside, something that you created yourself?
You can't.
All you can do is watch, remain as you were, carry through.
So I watch. I watch as she drifts away, I watch as he lowers her and bows his head. I watch as the water envelops her and selfishly claims our angel for its own.
Aeris is gone, and I couldn't do anything about it.
She disappeared, saying that she knew what had to be done, that she would go and face Sephiroth herself. She was the last Cetra. She said she had to play her part, give to the Planet what it had given her, save it for the sake of everyone else. Her selflessness used to crack me up. Now I cry.
At the age of 16, I've faced more than most have in their entire lives. Battles are but child's play to me. Theft is my hobby. Death is but an empty threat, I deal it generously to those who wish to ask it from me. Life I could care less about. Why should I care for something that can be taken away so easily? Why should I care about something that becomes a torture in itself when the circumstances are right? Or should I say wrong? I don't know anymore.
I used to be lively. I used to bounce around, laughing freely, insulting those who got in my way, laughing at them when they fell and grovelled at my feet, kissing my boots and begging for mercy. I ran away from home, then returned and kicked my father's ass. I stole countless Materia, pretending to be a store clerk just to sneak them from underneath the fat man's nose. I had an enormous ego with the attitude to go with it. Bright yellow, bright orange, bright enough to blind you but not nearly as bright and lively as me. I used to be naïve, I used to be childish, but I could get away with it. The great Yuffie Kisaragi: Materia Hunter extraordinaire, super shinobi, and 'way' cool. I was 16, acted like I was 6, but fought like I was 20.
I can barely find the words to describe just what I felt when I saw Aeris. When I saw Sephiroth coming down, seemingly falling from the sky, his great sword flashing as it sliced through the air, descending straight towards Aeris. I can't describe just what emotions ripped through me, what pieces of me I lost, when Sephiroth drove Masumane into Aeris' back, drove it into her and right out of her again, the tip protruding from just underneath Aeris' rib cage.
I was sucked into a vortex. Or rather, I created a vortex inside me that sucked everything away. For a blissful moment or two, I stood still, time stopped, I forgot to breathe, to blink, to live. All my emotions washed away, I couldn't feel anything, just a great emptiness where my heart used to be. The moment Sephiroth's sword entered Aeris, everything stopped.
And then, he ripped his sword out of her in one clean movement.
It was like an explosion inside. Sorrow. Loss. Anger. Sadness. Despair. Hatred. Everything rushed up and threatened to take hold of me and possess me, threatening to never let go. I felt weak, so very weak, my legs threatened to buckle from under me. It was shock that prevented me from rushing to Aeris, from rushing at Sephiroth and beating him to bits, reducing him to pulp with my own bare hands, impaling him again and again with my shuriken, it was shock that kept me in my place. Time slowed to a crawl, it seemed to take forever for Cloud to dive forward and catch Aeris as she fell forward, body in a graceful arc.
When Aeris' limp body finally hit Cloud's outstretched arms, time sped up again, and I remembered to breathe. I gasped, one sharp intake of breath that seemed to go in but had no effect whatsoever, one sharp intake of breath that barely sounded. To my side, I heard Tifa's cry of distress, and hearing it almost hurt as much as seeing Aeris fall. The invisible barrier that stopped Tifa and I from running to Cloud and Aeris' side lowered, freeing us from our horror-struck spell of immobility, and we both bound forward. Cloud had propped Aeris up into sitting position, leaning against the wall, while he shook from an unrecognizable emotion. I took one look at Aeris, at her serene face, her closed eyes, her soft smile, and the tears welled up uncontrollably. I looked at Tifa, and for a moment, I was scared. The tears temporarily stopped as I stared into her unrecognizable face. Her gaunt visage, her haunted eyes that seemed so horribly empty, her mouth that was open in a silent scream, the tears streaming down her pale cheeks. She wasn't Tifa, she wasn't Tifa anymore. The tears came back, the urge to sob returned with even more force than before, so much force that I couldn't control it any longer. I wanted to cry, I wanted to sob onto someone's shoulder, I wanted to scream and break down. But looking at Tifa, I knew I couldn't. She was gone, she herself needed release somewhere, I couldn't turn to her. Cloud was standing a little ways off, brooding in silent horror, and I turned around and ran into his limp arms, sobbing my heart out. He didn't respond, just stood there and let me cry. I sobbed into his chest, but it was like sobbing into a marble pillar. He was cold, hard, inhuman.
I pulled away from Cloud in time to see Tifa. Tifa running forward to the slumped over Aeris, tears streaming down her cheeks, unheeded. She knelt down beside Aeris and held out a trembling hand, whispering Aeris' name over and over again as though it could wake Aeris from her unending slumber, yet all the while crying because she knew it couldn't. Tifa's nimble fingers gently ran down Aeris' cheek and stayed there for just a few seconds before, overcome with sadness, she sprang up and wailed, heartbroken. Just the sound made me cringe in agony. Tifa ran off, unable to deal with the pain any longer, while I stayed motionless, burying my face in Cloud's immobile chest, trying to hide from the pain.
It was a long time before Tifa finally returned, her eyes dry but still horribly empty and haunting. My eyes were dry too, but like Tifa, it was only because I had no more tears left to shed. The pain inside made me want to cry, because at least there was a sense of release, no matter how minimal it was, in crying. Now, it was just impossible. Tifa and I stood together, wanting to comfort the other but unable to break free from our own pain, and watched silently as Cloud lifted Aeris up into his muscled arms, watched him wade into the tranquil water, watched him slowly lower her into its clear blue depths.
Who do you turn to when there's no-one left? When everyone's fallen to their knees, despair emanating like waves? Where do you go when you're cornered, trapped in your own sorrow? How do you escape something that can't be escaped, something that's trapping you from the inside, something that you created yourself?
You can't.
All you can do is watch, remain as you were, carry through.
So I watch. I watch as she drifts away, I watch as he lowers her and bows his head. I watch as the water envelops her and selfishly claims our angel for its own.
It's unbearable, the fact that I'll never see Aeris again. I'll never hear her laugh, never listen to her voice and say that all her blabbing bores me to death, never be able to stick my tongue out at her, never be able to get my hands on her Materia, never have her protect me in a battle, never have her to turn to when I need someone to talk to. Somehow, I feel different. The pain, though still there, is yielding to a stranger sensation. The sensation of growing up. The sensation of maturity. I glance sideways, at Tifa, and choke with despair. Tifa. She's so... changed. I used to think Tifa hated Aeris, because they both liked Cloud. Then, I thought that Tifa liked Aeris, as a friend. Now, I'm not sure what to think. Tifa is so changed, her expression so haunting, the pain and loss and hurt shining through so clearly. Her eyes, so empty that just looking into them makes you feel empty too. She's staring out at Cloud, staring out at Aeris, and from the way she's standing, I know she's restraining herself, restraining herself from running into the water and pushing Cloud away, restraining herself from trying, in vain, to get Aeris back.
"Aeris..."
Tifa's voice is cracked, full of unspoken pain, of lost hopes and dreams, of a lost friendship. Yet, at the same time, it's filled with love, love for the person whose name she whispered. Perhaps the lost friendship isn't lost friendship, it's lost love. I'll never know for sure.
Bright yellow, bright orange. They're bright enough to blind you, and before, they weren't nearly as bright and lively as me. Now? They're still bright enough to blind you, and they're bright enough to blind me too. Bright yellow, bright orange, they're bright enough to scar me.