I didn't think that this chapter was very funny, but people who already read it said that it's still good. Tell me your opinion, just don't flame me, ok?
Shendu and Xiao Fung are so childish in this chapter! Maybe even OOC... Do I really have to say that all the time? Yes I do...
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Chapter 2: Accidental Murders
The guides had finally slept and the demons took advantage of that and went walk along the forest. It was very big and was easy to get lost there. But, of course, the dangers of the forest were nothing compared to that guide.
"I don't want to continue here with that psychotic guide!", Shendu complained.
"Come on, it's just for one week. Hold on a little more.", Tchang said trying to sound encourager, though he himself wanted to go home as soon as possible.
"It's Tchang Zu's fault, he was the one who suggested this place.", Po Kong dared to say and the thunder demon frowned.
"Even if we had gone to any other place, the guides would be the same ones.", he defended Po shrugged.
"Whatever. Why don't we rip those two apart and go back to our home?", she suggested.
"We cannot defeat that maniac. She was an exterminator, remember?", Dai answered.
"Hey, Bai Tsa...", Xiao called grinning and appearing behind her.
"What is it?"
"Did you know that this place is know for having many ghosts and curses?", he asked and Bai snorted.
"Nonsense... Ghosts do not exist...", she crossing her arms. Suddenly, she felt something spookily touching her shoulders followed by a scream.
"BOOO!!!"
"AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!", she screamed jumping to Tso Lan's involuntary embrace again. Xiao, Shendu and Dai began to laugh, and she went down to the ground.
"You are afraid of ghosts!", Xiao said pointing at her.
"I am not! You just caught me unawares!"
He was a rich and solitary man. He lived in his castle that was many kilometers far from any villa. However, that solitude didn't bother him at all, even when he was already forty years.
He opened the window and looked at the moon. The night was beautiful thanks to the starry sky and the full moon. A perfect night to go for a walk around the forest. Since it wasn't very cold, he decided that it would be really a good idea.
As he walked there, he began to hear some voices. He thought that it should be someone trying to find a ghost. Due to his freaky appearance and his very pale skin, he had the fame of being the ghost of that region. Some people always went to the forest hoping to find the famous ghost, without knowing that he actually was just a normal man.
After some time, he started to find very amusing to pretend being a ghost and scaring everyone. Though people had stopped coming for a good while. Now when he paid attention, it seemed to be a group of at least five people.
He followed the voices until finding the group. When he came closer, he saw that they weren't people, but demons. Their ages were varied, and most was child or adolescent. That didn't matter. Certainly he would get to give them a fright.
That sounded a bit dangerous. After all, if the demons found out that he was just a common man playing a dirty trick on them, they would kill him. All right, he just had to be fast. Just give them a fright and then run away. The man smirked quietly. It has been a long while since when he had fun like that...
The demons were in silence for a while as they continued walking for the forest. Suddenly, Po glanced around herself and noticed something.
"Where are Xiao and Shendu?", she asked and the group stopped. They also glanced around themselves and didn't see the two youngest demons.
"I don't know...", Tchang answered shrugging.
"They must be hiding to give Bai Tsa a fright.", Dai guessed.
"Or perhaps they have unintentionally moved away and got lost.", Tso Lan said.
"Maybe they were caught by the ghost.", Dai said and Bai took it seriously and felt a cold shiver going down her spine, although she has tried to look completely calm.
Shendu and Xiao were following their siblings from a certain distance. They were planning to catch Bai unawares again and give her a fright. It had been Xiao's idea, and Shendu didn't like his childish games, but when the intention was to annoy Bai Tsa, he accepted with no hesitation. Suddenly, Shendu stopped and was thoughtful. Xiao turned around and approached of his brother.
"What?"
"Bai Tsa will never be alone. We need to move her away from our siblings."
"Ok, so what do you suggest?"
"I don't know yet."
"Then think of something already!"
"I'm trying, I cannot think with you talking at the same time!"
"It's because if I don't talk anything I won't be sure that you are going to think."
"Why it's just me who has to think?"
"Because it was you who said that had to think."
"I didn't say that. I just remarked that we need to move Bai away from our siblings."
"But you always say that you're more intelligent than me. Then you think and I just make sure that you're thinking."
"You are such a lazy demon! Now think of something already!"
"Why do I have to think?"
"Because it was your idea."
"But you agreed."
The man slowly approached of the two demons, hiding in the bushes. For his luck, the two youngest ones – therefore easiest to get scared ones – ended up going far away from the others and were alone.
"I don't want to know. You said that you were going to think and...", Xiao stopped as he saw that Shendu was staring quite uneasy at his right side.
"What is it now?"
"There's something observing us...", Shendu answered and Xiao glanced around himself.
"Shendu... Where are our siblings?", Xiao asked really worried now.
"What... what do you mean? We are alone here with something observing us?"
"Shendu, nothing is observing us. This forest doesn't have even cockroaches... I am more concerned about our siblings."
"Our siblings can take care of them selves, but we are alone here and there is...", Shendu pointed to a bush. "...something observing us." Xiao looked carefully at the bush and didn't see anything.
"There's nothing there... Let's go.", he said turning to go away and pulling his brother. After half an hour wandering around the forest, they reached to the brilliant conclusion that they were lost.
"Considering the position of the moon it's almost midnight already. Perhaps they have gone back to the camp.", Shendu said trying to calm his older brother who was beginning to panic.
"It's all your fault, because you wanted to think!", Xiao blamed and began to cry. Shendu sighed and didn't even snap at him. Shendu felt that something was observing them again, this time behind his brother. He saw a shadow leaving the bush and walking slowly to them. When the moonlight reached the creature, Shendu widened his eyes as he saw a thin and white being, with big and sharp yellow nails, grinning spookily.
Xiao stopped crying when seeing his brother's shock state.
"What...?", he asked sobbing and Shendu pointed to behind Xiao. The wind demon turned and was equally shocked.
"G... G... G... G... G... Gh... Gh... Gh... Gho.... Gho......", Xiao stuttered stepping back slowly and Shendu also backed away.
"GHOST!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!", they finally screamed at the same time and run away as fast as they could.
"Do you hear something?", Bai asked and the sound became much clearer – and loud – when the two youngest demons came running from the middle of the forest and coincidentally met their siblings.
"Ah, we finally found you.", Tchang said.
"What happened?", Tso asked seeing the expression of terror in his younger brother's faces.
"G-Ghost!!!", the two said pointing at the direction where they had come and everybody looked at there.
"There's no ghost! You must have been imagining things!", Dai said impatiently.
"It's true! He was all white, with big and sharp nails claws...", Shendu said and Xiao took a big stone of the ground.
"Each one takes a stone, then we all go there and we show you!", Xiao proposed and Bai snorted.
"Stop that! There's no ghost in this damn forest!", she took the stone from Xiao's hand. "Let's forget that and return to the camp.", she said throwing back the ston. They heard a sound of something beating and what seemed to be a pain groan. Everybody looked at the direction where Bai Tsa had thrown the stone and they saw that something white was fallen in the ground. When they went closer, Shendu and Xiao shivered.
"That's him!"
"It's the ghost!"
Tso Lan and Tchang Zu knelt down to watch the body more closely. The man's head was bleeding and the stone was almost all covered with blood. There was also some blood in a tree close to him.
"It's not a ghost, it's a human. He's just kind of anemic...", Tchang said and the two youngest demons glanced at each other.
"So he was just an idiotic human wanting to give us a fright?", Shendu snapped angry.
"Or maybe we have been hasty...", Xiao commented.
"We should beat him up to death!"
Tchang Zu placed his hand on the right part of the man's thorax. Tso Lan raised a brow trying to understand what he was doing.
"You can't do that anymore. Bai Tsa has already killed him.", Tchang said.
"How do you know?", Tso asked.
"I saw that his heart is not beating anymore."
"But... the heart is on the left side of the chest, not on the right side.", Tso tried to explain.
"You dare to question me?", Tchang shouted.
"But..."
"No! I am the oldest and I know when a human is dead or not!"
The male guide opened his eyes. He was thirsty, but fortunately he knew where he could find water. However, as soon as he got up, he saw that the demons weren't there. He found better not to tell his wife. She could want to hunt them, calling them of ingrates and that certainly wouldn't end well to anybody.
"All right, all right... He is dead...", Tso finally said after a long argue and snorted, while Tchang smiled in victory.
"What do we do now?", Po asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Bai killed that man, we cannot just leave him here."
"Why not?"
"If that guide finds out that we killed a human, she is going to kill us!"
Tchang thought for a while and admitted that she was right.
"Very well. We have just to get rid of the body.", he decided.
"What are we going to do? Eat him?", Po asked and everybody observed the man carefully.
"Ugh!", they all said together, making a disgust face.
"No way I am going to eat that... that... thing!", Shendu said pointing at the man.
"It must be spoiled.", Xiao added.
"We don't have to eat him. Let's throw him in a river.", Bai suggested.
"There's no river here.", Dai Gui said and she shook her head.
"I am the water demon. I can feel the water. And right now feel that there is a river near here."
"Well, let's go then!", Tchang ordered. They 'packed' the man's body with some big leaves and tied it with vines. Bai Tsa found the river and they all helped to throw the body. The current quickly took it and the demons sighed in relieve. What they didn't know was that the man was still alive. Even so, now it was already too late. His fate was already sealed.
The demons went back to the forest. Now it had passed some minutes after midnight, and Bai Tsa looked upward to see the moon. Bai Tsa liked the moon, since it reminded her of Tso Lan, one of her favorite siblings. When Bai Tsa lowered her glance again, she heard a quiet sound from her left side and looked at there to see what it was. She found herself staring at a pale face, with half-open eyes.
"AHHHHH!!!! A GHOST!!!!!", she screamed and instinctively punched the ghost. He was thrown some meters away and fell to the ground, where he stayed motionless.
Her siblings were alarmed with her scream and ran back to her. Bai Tsa was still trembling, staring at the 'ghost'.
"What happened, Bai Tsa?", Tchang asked in worry and she pointed at the body.
"A ghost!"
"Why is he fallen in the ground?", Shendu asked raising a brow.
"Because I punched that bastard!", she answered.
"If he is a ghost, how did you get to punch him?", Tso asked and everybody was in silence.
"Don't tell me you knocked down another human...", Tchang said.
"Uh..." was the only thing that Bai managed to say. They approached of the body and saw that it was really another human, but the only one that should never be killed. They stared horrified at the guide, and this time it was obvious that he was dead.
"Bai Tsa, you broke the guide's neck???", Tchang yelled placing his hands on his head.
"I wasn't on purpose..."
"THERE YOU ARE!!!!!", the female guide suddenly appeared behind them, and they froze. The woman stretched her whip angry.
"I looked for you everywhere!!! And where's my husband???", she asked, apparently not seeing the dead man in the ground. Shendu took advantage of that and fixed the position of the man's neck.
"Uh... your husband... he...", Tchang murmured and the woman looked at something behind him.
"Ah, there you are, honey.", she said lovely. Bai Tsa and Dai Gui were one in each side of the man, who now was standing up and nodding.
"Uh... Yeah... I was here teaching to the children about the bats.", he replied.
"Your voice is different...", the woman commented and Dai kicked Xiao, who was standing down behind the man, closing his nose. The wind demon flinched and cleared his throat.
"Erh... It's because of this cold air of the forest... I think I caught a cold... But I'm ok.", he said and the man's head tumbled exaggeratedly forward. Bai flinched and took his head from the back again, pulling it to where it should be.
"Oh, alright...", the woman said smiling. "I'll be waiting for you in the camp.", she continued turning to go away. When she was already far away, Dai and Bai sighed in relieve and let the man's body go. Xiao stood up and the demons gathered in a circle.
"After that. We should go to the Japanese doll's theater.", Xiao remarked.