mon amour secret

Tamahome sat on the edge of his big, fluffy bed, gazing in a trance at nothing in particular. He used his elbows to lean on his legs, and propped his head upon his folded hands. He was deep in thought; about the new life he had been offered as a member of the Suzaku Seven, to protect the priestess, and to fight along side him- him, the one who had supplied the cushiony bed upon which he sat, and provided the room in which he made no use of but to gaze.

In all honesty, Tamahome had never experienced such generosity from any one person before. The emperor had offered a new life to him, and promised to help Tamahome's family out of the hellish poverty they lived in. That is, had the fiend, Suboshi, not killed them all like insects, first. Now, everything he ever loved seemed to have disappeared. The ancient laws forayed Tamahome and Miaka's potential relationship; they were sure to nip that in the bud. But now, Tamahome had no one to love, but him.

A light tap on Tamahome's screen shōji snapped the young man from his daydream (which ironically took place at night).

"Come in," Tamahome said, his voice sounding ear-shatteringly loud compared to the intense silence he sat in before. The screens were pulled back slightly as a gentle face shone through just enough to be seen.

"Tamahome? Is everything alright? I saw your lanterns still on at this late hour. Are you okay?" Hotohori kindly asked, his voice smooth and clear, elegant as always.

"I'm fine, your highness," Tamahome tensely replied. A slight pause allowed Tamahome enough time to gather the courage to invite the young emperor in. "You can come in, if you'd like."

The shōji opened and shut at Hotohori stepped into what he would consider a moderately sized room. It bore the essentials; a bed, a tea table and a few chairs, a nightstand, and a set of chochin, both for decoration and practicality.

Tamahome rigidly gestured to a chair in front of him, "Would you like to have a seat?"

"Yes, please," Hotohori replied in an upper-class, almost sarcastic politeness that he couldn't help but use. He moved a chair to face the young, blue-haired man, and sat down. Hotohori was still in his royal best, his hair neatly tied on top his head, a few wispy bangs managing to grace his brow. "Is there something wrong, Tamahome?"

"Oh, no." Tamahome caught himself staring at the emperor's sheer beauty. He was enamored and his eyes would often wander into Hotohori's majestic gaze, after which Tamahome would always look away embarrassed. "I've just been sitting here, thinking."

Hotohori gave him a questioning look. "Would you like to tell me what about?" he politely asked. Tamahome became flustered, and desperately searched for convincing words with which to reply.

"Nothing in particular," he nervously responded, his voice obviously holding back the words he would truly say had he the valor. Hotohori didn't seem convinced.

"If something was bothering you, would you honestly tell me?" the royal beauty asked. "Because I want you to know, I'm here for you if you ever have a problem."

Tamahome smiled and nodded, "I will keep that in mind, your highness-"

"Why do you call me that?" Hotohori interrupted. Tamahome looked up at him, confused. "I am your equal, and more importantly, your friend. Please don't address me so formally." He smiled at the blue-haired warrior, reassuringly. "'Hotohori' will do just fine."

"Thank you, Hotohori. I'm honored to be considered a friend," Tamahome responded. Hotohori still didn't look pleased with Tamahome's formality, which the humbler one soon picked up on. "I'm sorry," Tamahome awkwardly apologized, slightly bowing as he sat.

Hotohori reached forward to Tamahome's shoulders, pushing him into an upright position. "Please, don't," the emperor insisted. A tint of red rose to Tamahome's cheeks as the other's hands held onto his shoulders. His face seemed so close to Tamahome's right now, and he looked away, self-consciously.

"Tamahome, are you sure that you're alright?" The emperor looked at him, worry evident in his golden eyes. Hotohori, in a last effort, gently nudged Tamahome's chin to face him. "Please Tamahome," he pleaded.

"I... I..." Tamahome stuttered before surrendering to his concern. The emotional buildup was overwhelming Tamahome, pushing him to the limit. Without thinking or reasoning with himself, Tamahome leaned in to give the emperor a gentle, and yet passionate kiss.

Hotohori's eyes shot open wide. He didn't understand. Was this what Tamahome was keeping from him? Of course it was... But why now? Tamahome's lips finally left the other's Hotohori staring at the man in pure disbelief.

"I'm sorry," Tamahome instantly apologized. "I was so out of place just then. Please forgive me." His cheeks were hot with blood, his face a soft glowing, fleshy pink.

"Why..." The blue-blood began, "Why did you keep this from me?"

"It's not that I didn't want to tell you," explained the blushing Tamahome. "It just never made much sense up until just now."

It was if that momentary kiss had alleviated all the emotions from Tamahome. It all made sense now. The rivalry over Miaka, the tension between Hotohori and himseld was all a subconscious mean of covering up Tamahome's attraction to the emperor.

"I don't know what to say," Hotohori said in an indecisive manner.

"Then don't," Tamahome quickly replied. "If it didn't fee right, just tell me now. But if you have to question yourself, then please just give this a chance." Tamahome stared into the Emperor's glowing golden eyes, unashamed. It was Hotohori who looked away now. "Just one night. Give me just one night's worth of a chance. Please, Hotohori."

The emperor withheld his response. The pleading Tamahome leaned in again, wrapping his arms around Hotohori's neck. His hand wandered up to the neat bun Hotohori held his long, chestnut hair in. Tamahome gently pulled the pin from his hair, Hotohori's glistening locks falling around them. Tamahome's lips softly kissed the emperor's cheek, before he whispered, "Just this once," into the other's ear. His lips ventured back to Hotohori's elegant neck, planting gentle kissed down to the emperor's shoulder. A soft sigh escaped Hotohori's lips, as he held the other close, leaning sensitively into Tamahome's generous kisses.

"Just tonight..." he sighed.