A/N: Okay, after uploading onto FF.net for a while now, and apparently it doesn't like my one liner openings to my fics. *Shrugs* i'm a bad girl, and so I'm putting this here so maybe the fic will upload so all of you people can tell me what you think!! Ja Ne!

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why.

why do I have to live this way-- live this way with you. with someone I can't hate, but god if I loved you-- I'd die. maybe that's why I'm so.... angry all the time-- angry with you. angry with everyone.... because I can't.

you're someone between emotions in my heart. How much simpler this would be if I could just let myself hate you-- but I can't. I can't hate the way you smile, or the way you hold me close after you've saved me-- or how you argue about me leaving-- because you're afraid I won't come back--

but-- the way you can't let her go. the way I'm always going to be second best, that's what stings. and I hate myself for it, but I think of you-- even when I'm at home, and I'm alone... it's you I'm worrying about back in the feudal era. I know you can protect yourself.... better than the lot of them-- but I'm missing you. I'm dying a little from being away from you.... the deep musky smell of your haori.... the rumbling purr you emit when your ears are rubbed..... and how you hate to see me cry--

I love the way you want to protect me all the time-- and how you make my heart beat a little faster when you hold my hand I love how.....

how faithful you are to your promises. even though it means you'll end up with her, and not me. I love the way you save people even though you say you hate them-- how you lie about how I smell.... and I know it's not me. I know I shouldn't make you choose, so I just keep all the reasons I love you inside--

away from you...