And here's the next chapter! The good news is that I have a Beta now. Everyone give dvana a huge round of applause. So there will be no more moments of extremely embarrassing mistakes to suffer through. Yay! Except of course, where I stubbornly strike out on my own, casting my defiance at the laws of English and grammar and polite society. Then, predictably, embarrassment will continue. All that's right and proper is dvana's. All that's not is mine.

Chapter 8: In which our hero suffers a bit and, for better or for worse, a declaration is made

Miroku dreamed. He lay on thick grass, his body warmed by summer's sun. There was a lake, its shoreline thick with lotus flowers, deep waters reflecting a heat-hazed sky. His head rested on Kagome's welcoming lap while she fed him large slices of overripe peaches, the juices dripping into her hand, sliding around her fingers, staining his lips with their sticky sweetness. Inuyasha and Kouga knelt nearby, adorned in the ornate costumes and stylized makeup of courtly Geishas. Inuyasha was singing as Kouga played the koto. Their music, gentle and melancholy, wove Miroku and Kagome into their own private world, heavy with the honeyed scent of the tender fruit Kagome slipped between his lips to melt on his tongue. Kagome was murmuring his name, and Miroku lost himself in the enticing movements of her mouth. Her voice whispered into his mind, slow and perfumed as the summer breeze, "Shall I dance for you, beloved? Shall I dance?"

Then she poked him in the nose. Hard. With a yelp Miroku woke up. And found himself staring into cornflower blue eyes, which blinked down at him from a startling close distance. He tried to jerk away, and blue eyes danced backwards. Then his mind caught up with him and things started to look familiar. "Hey Shippou," he managed to croak out of a dry, roughened throat.

Shippou climbed carefully back onto his chest, somehow managing to avoid those areas that were bruised and battered. "You stink," he said matter of factly, wrinkling his little nose.

Miroku could not disagree

"And you look terrible."

Miroku stared steadily up at the young fox demon.

"You drank too much last night." Shippou folded his arms and gave a prim little sniff.

Miroku raised an eyebrow.

"Mama always said papa deserved the headache he got when he drank too much," Shippou informed him.

Which made Miroku realize something. His head didn't really hurt. At least, not in a hangover sort of way. Sunlight streamed through the open windows and pierced through the woven door covering, but the brightness barely bothered him.

"Lady Kaede said you'll have enough hurts to deal with though." Shippou's frown implied that he didn't quite agree with the old priestess. "She left you some tea you're supposed to drink as soon as you wake up."

Miroku pushed himself into a sitting position with a stifled groan, envying Shippou his easy movement as he leapt to the floor. There was a cup of tea beside his bed, the liquid long cooled to room temperature. Miroku took a small sip, made a face, and then gulped down the remainder as quickly as possible. The foul flavor brought back a vague memory from last night, and while he still suspected Lady Kaede of creating the bad taste on purpose, he had to admit that if this tea was indeed responsible for preventing the expected hangover he was grateful for its medicinal properties. Avoiding the morning-after pain was definitely worth stomaching the nauseating taste.

Miroku cleared his throat and looked blearily around the room. "Where is everyone?" he asked, his voice still rough and creaky.

"Lady Kaede's gone to check on Mrs. Hino's new baby. Sango and Kirara are off practicing battle stuff, which I still say is just playing and they could've let me go too." Shippou pouted briefly. "Oh, and Inuyasha's gone to get Kagome."

Miroku froze, staring at Shippou in swiftly mounting horror. Shippou, busy creating shadow puppets in the strong morning sun, was oblivious.

"He said he had some stuff to explain to her, and not to worry, he'd take care of it. And he told me not to wake you until he was in Kagome's time." Shippou turned to blink up at Miroku, his hands forming the shape of a springing leopard on one wooden wall.

Miroku managed to heave himself to his feet and hobble towards the open door, ignoring his half-clothed state and the stiff and pulling protest of his body. Shippou trotted curiously after him. "Where're you going? Did you need to talk to Inuyasha? He's already gone, Miroku."

Miroku swayed unsteadily in the doorway. Shippou was right. Inuyasha was probably already talking to Kagome; already 'explaining' the situation to her in his usual sensitive and tactful manner. Miroku could imagine her reaction. Vividly. Great Buddah. She was never going to talk to him again. With a heartsick moan, he sank down to his knees and tried to keep from throwing up.

"Yup." Shippou patted his shoulder sympathetically. "Too much to drink."

Miroku would have liked to stay slumped in the doorway forever. But the need to not look like a pathetic drunk when Kagome came back to kill him finally forced him to his feet. If he was going to die, he was going to do it with dignity. And on the bright side, she'd probably return dragging Inuyasha's corpse behind her. Miroku didn't mind dying so much if it meant the infuriating half-demon went down with him.

He'd almost finished with his morning ablutions (it'd taken a bit longer what with all the bandages) when he saw Inuyasha come stomping out of the forest. Kagome was not with him and Miroku didn't know if that was a good thing or not. Taking a deep breath he finished tying on his pants and went outside, ready to hear the worst.

"I tell you what, monk," Inuyasha huffed angrily, "you're welcome to her. Headstrong bitch."

Miroku pulled his hair back, securing it into place while slanting a quick glance at Shippou. The young fox demon was playing with a ball and seemed oblivious. "She didn't agree with your proposal?" he asked carefully. Miroku had used the old, 'don't mind me, I'm totally involved in my playing,' trick when he was a child and wanted to know what the grownups were so upset about, and he strongly suspected that Shippou was a master of that particular game.

"She wouldn't even listen. She was all," and here Inuyasha put on a squeaky falsetto that sounded nothing like Kagome, "'Is anyone dead? Is anyone dying?' And when I said no, she was all, 'Then go home and let me finish my breakfast!'" Inuyasha sat down with a disgusted grunt. "Then she threatened to 'sit' me until I'd dug through to 'Amer-ca.' Whatever the hell that means."

Miroku felt like a sword blade had just been lifted from his neck. "So you've told her nothing?"

"Weren't you listening? She was too busy screaming at me. Couldn't get a word in edgewise. I'm telling you, Miroku, you'd better set the law down fast with her. Otherwise she'll end up walking all over you."

Miroku noticed that Shippou had rolled his ball a little closer, very carefully not looking at him or Inuyasha. "Mmm," he murmured noncommittally, desperately trying to figure out how to steer the conversation away from this particular topic. If Shippou figured out what was going on, the entire village would find out, and someone would tell Kagome, and he'd go back to being a dead man.

"Damn, Miroku, you look like shit!" Inuyasha grinned up at him. "Looks like someone kicked your ass from here to the moon."

Well, that was one way of changing the topic. Miroku gave Inuyasha a sour look. The half-demon, of course, seemed fully recovered from yesterday's bout. The only thing that suggested Inuyasha had received injury was a slash of red on his cheek. And that served more to point out how high his bloody cheekbones were than anything else. Sometimes Miroku really hated the half-demon.

With a put-upon sigh, Miroku fetched his robes and his small sewing kit and sank gingerly down in a good spot of sunlight. Unlike some half-demons he knew, he didn't have self-repairing, self-cleaning, always-looking-like-new-no matter-what-their-owner-put-them-through clothing. He settled into sewing up the new rips in his too often repaired robes and did his best to ignore Inuyasha lounging lazily beside him.

"See, that's exactly what I mean. You should get Kagome to do that for you."

Miroku swore he saw Shippou's ears twitch and he frowned at Inuyasha. "Your head hurt much?" he asked, rather nastily. Inuyasha didn't seem to notice the tone.

"Nah," he said casually. "Didn't drink enough."

Miroku stared at him, completely nonplused. "Inuyasha, you were singing. Loudly."

"And really badly too," Shippou piped up helpfully.

"How would you know, runt. You were snoring so loud the stars were complaining."

Shippou planted his fists on his hips indignantly. "Was not!"

"Were too!"

"Was not!"

"Were too!"

They went on like that for a while, degenerating quickly into childish insults, but Miroku wasn't paying attention. For some strange reason he'd been about to defend Inuyasha's singing voice. Which made no sense. His memory of the night before wasn't the clearest, but he did seem to recall some horribly off-key noises coming from Inuyasha.

"Do you really want to make me get up and come over there, brat?" Inuyasha was finally getting bored with the name calling.

"You couldn't catch me, you lazy, stinky-butt, dog-head!" Shippou, however, was not.

Miroku sighed deeply. If they kept this up, he WAS going to get a headache. Which would mean that he'd drank that nasty tea concoction for nothing. "Shippou," he said smoothly but loudly, deftly cutting off Inuyasha's no doubt eloquent retort, "why don't you go to the well and wait for Kagome to return? That way she doesn't have to walk back all by herself."

Shippou's eyes lit up, more than likely imagining all the candy he'd get with no Inuyasha to compete with. "Sure thing, Miroku!" Grinning widely, Shippou scampered off towards the forest.

Miroku felt a bit bad sending the fox kit off like that, but he could not risk another chance of Inuyasha and Kagome being alone togther.

"'Dog-head'," Inuyasha mused quietly when Shippou was gone. "I don't even know what that means. How is that an insult?"

Miroku bit off the final piece of thread and examined his sewing job carefully under the sun's strong rays. "That was a battle of your choosing. I refuse to get involved." Satisfied with his work, he climbed laboriously to his feet and carefully put his newly repaired clothes on, trying to disturb his ribs as little as possible. He was busy brushing off the worst of the mud when he noticed Inuyasha staring thoughtfully at him. Or more properly, at his robes.

"What?" Miroku asked testily, suddenly self-conscious of his admittedly ragged appearance.

"I was wondering about your future plans. I mean after Naraku is defeated. You don't plan on being a traveling monk forever, do you?" Inuyasha squinted up at him.

"I've not really thought that far ahead." Miroku avoided clenching his gloved hand into a fist by sheer will.

"Well start thinking," Inuyasha said imperiously. "I'm not going to let you drag Kagome all around the countryside."

And now Miroku was trying to avoid wide-eyed shock. "You drag her around the countryside all the time!" So he didn't avoid the shock so well.

"That's different," Inuyasha gave a dismissive wave. "What I want to know is how you plan on taking care of her." He fixed Miroku with a steely glare. "She deserves the best. I don't want her living like some farmer's wife."

Miroku sucked in a breath. What the hell was wrong with farmers? His mother had come from a farming family. "If you're that worried about proper bloodlines, why don't you go find Kouga? He is a prince after all," Miroku said coldly.

"He's a wolf-demon!" Inuyasha replied, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Ah, so it's a specific sort of royalty you're looking for," Miroku said with mock thoughtfulness. "How disappointing for you that you couldn't find a properly docile pampered little prince to take Kagome."

Inuyasha frowned confusedly. "What are you... Are you getting mad about this?"

"Oh no. How could I, a simple, common monk, be angry with a being of such noble lineage?"

Inuyasha's frown deepened. "I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, monk. I'm just trying to make the best of a bad situation." He leapt easily to his feet. "But I can tell you this: if you don't start thinking responsibly I'll finish what I started yesterday."

Miroku's mind boggled at the thought of Inuyasha lecturing him about responsibility. "I don't need you to tell me how to take care of a woman."

Inuyasha's eyes flashed with anger at the sneer implicit in Miroku's remark, and Miroku suddenly wondered why he was baiting the half-demon while he was both injured and pretty much unarmed. He knew Inuyasha wasn't trying to be insulting. And frankly, his questions were legitimate. Miroku needed to defuse the situation before it got out of control. He took a deep calming breath, "Inuyasha -,"

Inuyasha cut him off with a frustrated growl. "I'm talking about Kagome's life here, shit-head!"

And there was the opening. "I can give Kagome a good life, dog-head."

Inuyasha blinked wordlessly at Miroku for a moment and then fought a grin. "You forgot 'stinky-butt.'"

"It was implied," Miroku said piously.

Inuyasha broke into a full belly-laugh, and Miroku allowed himself a small smile. Eventually, Inuyasha brought himself under control. "You really can take care of her? And don't twist my words, pervert!"

"I have several small...," Miroku searched for the best word, "nest-eggs stashed in safe places around the country." And was this ever the last thing he'd thought he'd do with them.

Inuyasha nodded knowingly. "From all your con-jobs," he said sagely.

Miroku's protest (con-job was such an ugly word) was cut off by a cheerful cry.

"Hi Miroku! Hi Inuyasha!" Kagome was back.

Miroku felt elated. And ill. And once again where Kagome was concerned, absolutely clueless on how to handle a woman. Was there a manly way to run for the hills?

"So here's the plan." Inuyasha settled into an almost battle ready stance. "You gag her, and I'll tell her how it's going to be."

Okay, so he at least had a good idea of what NOT to do. "Umm. Yeah. Or, we could try letting me talk to her first."

Inuyasha looked doubtful. "I don't know. Talking to Kagome always seems to get me in trouble."

And there were some choice comments Miroku could make in response to that particular observation. He stifled the urge. "Trust me in this, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha frowned and then nodded. Reluctantly, but he nodded. And then Kagome was there, smiling at the two of them - and it was too late for Miroku to run for it. Especially when her cheerful look changed to worry and she reached up to gingerly touch the cuts on his face.

"Miroku! What happened?" Then she turned on Inuyasha. "You told me no one was injured."

"Dying." Inuyasha said with a sniff, folding his arms and sticking his nose in the air. "I told you no one was dying."

But Kagome had already focused back on Miroku. "Does it hurt? Has it been looked at? Have you cleaned it properly? Usually people don't, and then there's infection and scarring... " Tucking her arm through Miroku's, and barely taking a breathe between words, she led him back inside, dropping her bag and making a beeline for Lady Kaede's medicinal supplies. "...blood poisoning, and then you'd die!" She glared fiercely at Miroku and, apparently having finished lecturing him, turned her attention to the supplies, muttering under her breath as she pulled out what she needed.

Usually Miroku enjoyed Kagome in full healer mode. She was such an adorable mixture of bossy and concerned. And he'd always relished the foreign sensation of such undivided attention, even before he and Kagome started their 'arrangement.' But they were alone now and the thought of what he had to say to her filled him with terror. He could actually feel himself trembling.

Fortunately, Kagome was too busy going through Lady Kaede's supplies to notice his strange behavior. He tried to say her name but his voice stuck in his throat so he coughed instead but still, she turned to him. As she smiled her eyes softened in a way he thought was maybe just for him, and he started to reach for her, just wanting to hold her and smell her comforting scent and revel in her closeness for a moment, just one more moment - and Shippou tumbled out of her bag.

"Kagome, there's no candy in here," he complained.

Miroku stifled a moan of frustration and went to sink down miserably in a corner.

Kagome flashed Miroku a wry look and shook her head. "I brought you plenty yesterday, Shippou. Don't tell me you ate it all already!"

Shippou hesitated, probably not wanting to seem too greedy and risk ending a good thing. Finally he went with the hurt little boy look, all big glistening eyes and trembling mouth. "But... but you always bring me candy." Miroku had to admit it: the fox kit was good.

"Tell you what Shippou," Kagome said placatingly as she advanced on Miroku, special life-saving cleaning supplies in hand , "next time I'll bring you an extra helping."

"Sucker," Miroku said. Kagome gave a small shrug of helpless agreement, and Shippou stuck his tongue out at him.

Kagome knelt gracefully beside Miroku and started carefully cleaning the scrapes on his face. She winced as she dabbed, which was cute because it barely hurt Miroku at all. "How did this happen?" she asked.

"Got too close to a tree," Miroku said vaguely.

Shippou scrambled up onto Kagome's shoulder. "And he was drunk," he said helpfully.

"Last night?" Kagome looked surprised, staring at Miroku questioningly.

"Ummm..." He liked Shippou, he really did. But right now Miroku could cheerfully strangle him.

"Lady Kaede said he broke some ribs," Shippou added.

Now Kagome was frowning, and Miroku squirmed uncomfortably as she looked at him. "Take off your shirt," she said. And who knew such promising words could sound so ominous.

"Always willing to disrobe for..." Miroku's weak joke trailed off as Kagome's eyes narrowed. He obediently stripped down to his waist.

Kagome sucked in a breath and reached out to run her fingers gently across the wrappings around his chest, over some of the more colorful bruises on his stomach, and down to the bandage on his side. Leaning in, she carefully pulled the bandage back and stared at the gashes it had covered.

"It's not as bad as it looks." Miroku said quietly. "I'm pretty sure my ribs are just cracked, and I can hardly feel the bruises."

When Kagome looked back up at him, he was shocked to see she was blinking back tears. "Who did this to you?"

"It doesn't matter. I really am okay."

"Miroku, of course it matters!" Kagome flushed with righteous indignation. "And you've got broken ribs! That's not 'okay.' That's nowhere near 'okay.' Now tell me who did this to you!"

"That's what we'd all like to know." Sango walked in wearing her demon-killing armor, face rosy from recent activity, and looked pointedly at Miroku. He did his best to meet her stare and wondered where the hell Inuyasha was and if the demon even understood that he wanted to speak to Kagome alone.

As if summoned, Inuyasha pushed aside the swinging door covering and poked his head inside. "Sango, I'm serious, come ba..." He trailed off as both Sango and Kagome fixed him with twin glares. "Uh. Yeah. Never mind." He threw Miroku a sympathetic look and disappeared back outside.

Sango turned to Kagome. "He and Inuyasha came in late last night, both looking like they'd been through a war, this one drunk out of his mind, and Inuyasha refusing to answer any questions."

"I wasn't drunk," Miroku protested almost automatically, desperately trying to figure a way out of this nightmare.

Kagome look at Sango. "Inuyasha was hurt too?" She looked at Miroku, and then down at his injured side, and when her face crinkled thoughtfully he was horrified to realize she was starting to put pieces together. Kagome could be frighteningly clever at times. She looked back up at him, her mouth thinned and she swiftly rose up to stand shoulder to shoulder with Sango. The two of them stared down mercilessly at Miroku, and seriously, if Buddah cared at all, the earth would open up and swallow him whole. Right now.

"Miroku, who did this to you?" Kagome asked quietly.

Miroku looked around helplessly. Shippou was watching with gleeful fascination. And was he seriously going to have this conversation with a fucking audience?

Then Kagome stiffened. "Oh no," she murmured. "Not now."

All eyes turned to her and then the sound of raised voices were heard. One was unmistakably Inuyasha's, and the other...

"Kouga," Kagome said wearily. "I'd better get out there before they kill each other." She headed quickly out, followed by Sango; neither of them giving Miroku even a final glance.

Shippou shook his head. "You are soo lucky," he told Miroku; then he scampered after the two girls, not wanting to miss a moment of drama.

Miroku heaved a sigh and climbed stiffly to his feet. He thought he'd be grateful for any distraction. But this? Another demon who considered Kagome his, and who the hell knew what Inuyasha was going to tell him when Kouga started making his claims. Miroku slapped his bandage back into place, let out a surprised grunt because - ouch - and hastily pulled his clothes all the way on as he headed outside himself.

"...just letting you know, but if you don't think you're up for it, dog-breath -,"

"Oh, I'm up for it. I just figured I'd get warmed up by smearing you into a nasty piece of wolf-turd. Since you're already halfway there."

Fortunately Inuyasha and Kouga were still in the name calling part of their never-ending conflict. However, Inuyasha had his hand on his sword hilt, and Kouga was lowering into a crouch. All it needed was...

"Inuyasha, Kouga has come to us for help. Can't you be civil for once?"

Ah, yes. Enter Kagome.

"You taking good care of my woman, mut?"

And there was a conventional sort of retort that once uttered began the actual physical clashing, but Inuyasha went off script, glancing at Miroku and then folding his arms nonchalantly. "Not my concern anymore, asshole."

And that confused everyone, except for Miroku. And, oh yeah, this was EXACTLY how Miroku wanted things to go. But what the hell; he was getting sick of the delays. "She's not your woman, Kouga," he said quietly as he walked steadily towards the demon prince.

Kouga stared at Miroku, then at Inuyasha, back at Miroku, back to Inuyasha. "You're getting a human to fight your battles for you half-breed?"

Inuyasha smirked. "Damn, you're stupid. Even for a mangy wolf."

"I know what's mine," Kouga said forcefully.

"I told you. Kagome is not yours," Miroku replied.

"She's sure as hell not dog-shit's over there."

"No." Miroku agreed, coming to a stop just a pace from the angry and confused wolf-demon. "She's mine."

Behind him someone made a strangled sound, but Miroku could not afford to be distracted now. This had to be done exactly right, and with Kouga's shard-enhanced speed, he'd only get one chance. Thank all the gods of heaven and earth, Kouga already stood with his back to the forest.

Kouga now looked beyond confused, but fairly quickly his face hardened. "Fine, human. If you're that eager to die -,"

Miroku had raised up his right hand palm out, left hand already loosening the protective beads, and Kouga bit off his words with a sharp click of teeth. He was starting to look worried now. Good.

"You have seen what my wind tunnel can do. Believe me when I say that your speed will not save you." The edges of his glove were fluttering as the beads slipped further away. Miroku gritted his teeth as he felt the wind tunnel wake up, eager to be set free, eager to suck up everything in its path. "However, you are a strong ally against our common enemy." It was important to give Kouga a way out, and hopefully, without his pack-brothers here as silent witnesses, Kouga would take what was offered. "I would prefer we remained allies and not do our enemy's work for him."

Kouga eyed Miroku's hand cautiously, and then he nodded. "All right, human." And Miroku had to physically restrain a sigh of relief. He could show no sign of weakness or hesitation. "We'll delay this matter for the time being. But once Naraku is destroyed, I'll take what's mine." And then, with a whirl of wind and dust, he was gone.

Miroku quickly tightened his rosary back around his hand, shutting in the wind-tunnel, unspeakably grateful that he hadn't had to use it. Gathering his courage, he turned around. Inuyasha looked pleased. Sango looked stunned. Shippou looked like a difficult puzzle had finally fallen into place. And Kagome was... crying?

"Umm... so I guess there's some things I need to explain," Miroku said awkwardly.

"Yeah, but Kouga really does need some help," Inuyasha interrupted. "And though I hate the idea of helping a damn wolf, I really like the idea of pissing off Naraku."

Sango visibly shook herself and glanced concernedly at Kagome. "I'll leave Kirara," she said, speaking to Miroku, but not quite looking at him. "You and Kagome can catch up to us."

Very quietly, she, Inuyasha, and an obviously reluctant Shippou headed off in the direction Kouga had gone, leaving Miroku and Kagome alone. Miroku stared anxiously at Kagome, but she was looking down now and her bangs hid her eyes. Part of him still wanted to run; to pack up his stuff, hit the road, and never look back. But that part of him was small and wimpy and honestly outmatched by the larger part that abhorred seeing Kagome in pain. So Miroku walked over to Kagome and gathered her into his arms, rubbing her back to try and soothe away her stiffness.

"So, anyway," he started, his voice shaky, "a funny thing happened on the way back from the well."