TITLE: The Pain of Love
CONTENT: F/F relationship
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Sailor Moon
NOTES: This is Part 2 of the story in Ami's POV. This is going to continue the story after Makoto feels that everything is not going to be alright when they are in bed sleeping. Enjoy!!
I am sitting on your bed. Staring at the wall.
....
I feel disgusting. Did that really happen? Flesh. Naked flesh. Your naked flesh. How strange. How wrong. How completely and insanely…
Wonderful!!! Oh Kami!!! I swear I was in heaven!!
'Makoto,' I think to myself, 'How could I never have noticed how beautiful you are.'
I sigh.
I am still staring at your wall.
The bathroom door opens and I freeze. I know you are there staring at me but my body f\does not wish to move. My mind does not wish to acknowledge your presence.
I hear you breathe in, and then out, and then you begin to say.
"Ami I…."
I don't let you get any farther. All these thoughts in my head. What would you think about them? I do not think you understand what I really thought of seeing you completely naked. These thought run in my mind for about a second before I begin to practically scream I am sorry in as many ways as possible.
"OH MAKO-CHAN I'M SO SORRY!!! I WAS SO DUMB JUST TO STICK MY HEAD IN THE BATHROOM!!! I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU WERE NOT DECENT!!1 IT IS JUST THAT I THOUGHT YOU WERE STILL IN THE SHOWER!!!1 AND......"
I just kept on screaming stuff. I don't even know what I was saying. I could feel you smiling at me. I couldn't help wondering how you could be smiling at a time like this. Then I felt it. You were coming towards me. I began to mumble like a fool. Then it happened.
You pressed your finger to my lips. I could have fainted. I thought I heard you sigh but I was too dazed to notice a damn thing. Then, you leaned close to my ear and I cold feel your warm breath on my ear and I did my absolute best not to start breathing too hard. Then I would be too obvious.
Suddenly, a whisper so soft and slow I almost didn't hear it but I did,
"No need to apologize Ami. I already told you that you could never be a burden to me. Relax."
I was so relieved I forgot about your warm breath and the tingles that were going through me. All I cared about was that you forgave me. I think our cheeks ran against each other softly when you pulled away but I think that, again, I hardly noticed.
When I look up I cannot help but frown. You look so…dejected. Why? Did I do something wrong? Maybe you just need some sleep. Yeah that's it. Sleep.
After pushing you onto the bed I walk into the living room to grab another pillow.
Coming back into your room, I place the pillow down by yours, and lay right next to you. I can smell you. You smell nice. I pull the covers over both of us. You don't notice.
I want to talk so I turn to you on my side and my face is only inches away from yours. I cannot stop thinking about how bad I want to kiss you. I smile and begin to talk.
"Can I ask you something Makoto?" I ask.
You start stuttering out an answer. I try not to laugh. I remember what kind of reaction that got out of you earlier. I still feel pretty bad about that. You stutter,
"Uh y-yeah s-sure. A-a-anything."
I laugh at myself inwardly. I didn't even know what I wanted to ask. I just wanted to talk. So, I just asked something. The first thing that came to my mind.
"Do you....do you ever think about love?" 'Whoa!' I think, 'Where did that come from?'
Then I realize. I really want an answer to this.
You don't say anything. I begin to speak again not even caring what I am sayin. Honestly I just want to have a conversation.
"I mean because everybody else in our little group have certain romances. Usagi has Mamoru, Rei has people, including men, constantly praising her at her school, and Mina...well Mina can have anyone she wants. I mean, we seem to be the only ones without love in our lives."
'Wow, how true' I think. I guess Ii am much wiser when I don't think.
You finally say something.
"What do you mean?"
I smile. Oh Makoto. You are so cute when you are clueless.
"Oh nothing Makoto forget it." I say not wanting to annoy you.
I'm tired. You look like you would be comfortable to rest on. I giggle inwardly when I feel you freze after resting my head near your bosom.
Wow, this is comfortable.
Right before I am about to drift off into sleep, I hear you sigh a sad sigh making me frown. I am too tired though to ask what was wrong and I fall into a deep, deep sleep.
………….
When I wake up, I am warm and tingly. Your body is pressed up against mine and I can smell the wonderful scent that is you.
I close my eyes and just enjoy this for a little while trembling as I feel you unconsciously reach up my shirt and lay your hand on my back.
It is so warm. I smile as I raise my head from your chest and look at your sleeping face . You are so lovely do you know that? I want to ask you so in a soft whisper I say into your ear,
"You are so lovely do you know that?"
You mumble a little and then say as clear as day,
"Ami" In such a soft slow voice. My whole body trembles.
"Makoto," I say softly, "I am going to kiss you now.
Your eyes are still closed and your breath is still in rhythm. You are still sleeping so it will be fine to give you a little peck wont it. You will b\never know right?
But then I think about how disgusted and appalled you would be if you woke up or found out about it later on in some way. You would be so appalled you would probably never speak to me again. You would be o.k. with that though. I know it. You would have a good reason not to have acquaintances with me anymore. I bet everyone would be jealous that they didn't have a good reason. No one loves me. They just pity me.
However, when I look at your face again I cannot help but long to kiss you.
Leaning closer, I put my forehead to yours. Lowering my chin, I begin to feel your soft breath on my lips.
'Oh Kami' I think to myself, 'I want this so bad!!!!!'
Finally our lips are just centimeters away from each other.
I can't take this anymore. I push forward and pressed my lips to yours hard at first and then I softly begin to massage your lips with mine softly.
Getting into the feel of it, I hold the back of your head with one hand and I caress your cheek with the other. The whole time you just stay sleeping not making a sound.
I pull away reluctantly totally and completely breathless. That was so perfect. Your lips are so soft.
Then I hear you begin to say something,
"Thank you"
My eyes go wide. Are you awake?
You smile. Your eyes open.
"Thank you" You say once again.
'Oh Kami'I think, 'Why does this stuff always happen to me!!
I groan and look down to hide my face blushing.
What now Ami? What now?
CONTENT: F/F relationship
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Sailor Moon
NOTES: This is Part 2 of the story in Ami's POV. This is going to continue the story after Makoto feels that everything is not going to be alright when they are in bed sleeping. Enjoy!!
I am sitting on your bed. Staring at the wall.
....
I feel disgusting. Did that really happen? Flesh. Naked flesh. Your naked flesh. How strange. How wrong. How completely and insanely…
Wonderful!!! Oh Kami!!! I swear I was in heaven!!
'Makoto,' I think to myself, 'How could I never have noticed how beautiful you are.'
I sigh.
I am still staring at your wall.
The bathroom door opens and I freeze. I know you are there staring at me but my body f\does not wish to move. My mind does not wish to acknowledge your presence.
I hear you breathe in, and then out, and then you begin to say.
"Ami I…."
I don't let you get any farther. All these thoughts in my head. What would you think about them? I do not think you understand what I really thought of seeing you completely naked. These thought run in my mind for about a second before I begin to practically scream I am sorry in as many ways as possible.
"OH MAKO-CHAN I'M SO SORRY!!! I WAS SO DUMB JUST TO STICK MY HEAD IN THE BATHROOM!!! I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU WERE NOT DECENT!!1 IT IS JUST THAT I THOUGHT YOU WERE STILL IN THE SHOWER!!!1 AND......"
I just kept on screaming stuff. I don't even know what I was saying. I could feel you smiling at me. I couldn't help wondering how you could be smiling at a time like this. Then I felt it. You were coming towards me. I began to mumble like a fool. Then it happened.
You pressed your finger to my lips. I could have fainted. I thought I heard you sigh but I was too dazed to notice a damn thing. Then, you leaned close to my ear and I cold feel your warm breath on my ear and I did my absolute best not to start breathing too hard. Then I would be too obvious.
Suddenly, a whisper so soft and slow I almost didn't hear it but I did,
"No need to apologize Ami. I already told you that you could never be a burden to me. Relax."
I was so relieved I forgot about your warm breath and the tingles that were going through me. All I cared about was that you forgave me. I think our cheeks ran against each other softly when you pulled away but I think that, again, I hardly noticed.
When I look up I cannot help but frown. You look so…dejected. Why? Did I do something wrong? Maybe you just need some sleep. Yeah that's it. Sleep.
After pushing you onto the bed I walk into the living room to grab another pillow.
Coming back into your room, I place the pillow down by yours, and lay right next to you. I can smell you. You smell nice. I pull the covers over both of us. You don't notice.
I want to talk so I turn to you on my side and my face is only inches away from yours. I cannot stop thinking about how bad I want to kiss you. I smile and begin to talk.
"Can I ask you something Makoto?" I ask.
You start stuttering out an answer. I try not to laugh. I remember what kind of reaction that got out of you earlier. I still feel pretty bad about that. You stutter,
"Uh y-yeah s-sure. A-a-anything."
I laugh at myself inwardly. I didn't even know what I wanted to ask. I just wanted to talk. So, I just asked something. The first thing that came to my mind.
"Do you....do you ever think about love?" 'Whoa!' I think, 'Where did that come from?'
Then I realize. I really want an answer to this.
You don't say anything. I begin to speak again not even caring what I am sayin. Honestly I just want to have a conversation.
"I mean because everybody else in our little group have certain romances. Usagi has Mamoru, Rei has people, including men, constantly praising her at her school, and Mina...well Mina can have anyone she wants. I mean, we seem to be the only ones without love in our lives."
'Wow, how true' I think. I guess Ii am much wiser when I don't think.
You finally say something.
"What do you mean?"
I smile. Oh Makoto. You are so cute when you are clueless.
"Oh nothing Makoto forget it." I say not wanting to annoy you.
I'm tired. You look like you would be comfortable to rest on. I giggle inwardly when I feel you freze after resting my head near your bosom.
Wow, this is comfortable.
Right before I am about to drift off into sleep, I hear you sigh a sad sigh making me frown. I am too tired though to ask what was wrong and I fall into a deep, deep sleep.
………….
When I wake up, I am warm and tingly. Your body is pressed up against mine and I can smell the wonderful scent that is you.
I close my eyes and just enjoy this for a little while trembling as I feel you unconsciously reach up my shirt and lay your hand on my back.
It is so warm. I smile as I raise my head from your chest and look at your sleeping face . You are so lovely do you know that? I want to ask you so in a soft whisper I say into your ear,
"You are so lovely do you know that?"
You mumble a little and then say as clear as day,
"Ami" In such a soft slow voice. My whole body trembles.
"Makoto," I say softly, "I am going to kiss you now.
Your eyes are still closed and your breath is still in rhythm. You are still sleeping so it will be fine to give you a little peck wont it. You will b\never know right?
But then I think about how disgusted and appalled you would be if you woke up or found out about it later on in some way. You would be so appalled you would probably never speak to me again. You would be o.k. with that though. I know it. You would have a good reason not to have acquaintances with me anymore. I bet everyone would be jealous that they didn't have a good reason. No one loves me. They just pity me.
However, when I look at your face again I cannot help but long to kiss you.
Leaning closer, I put my forehead to yours. Lowering my chin, I begin to feel your soft breath on my lips.
'Oh Kami' I think to myself, 'I want this so bad!!!!!'
Finally our lips are just centimeters away from each other.
I can't take this anymore. I push forward and pressed my lips to yours hard at first and then I softly begin to massage your lips with mine softly.
Getting into the feel of it, I hold the back of your head with one hand and I caress your cheek with the other. The whole time you just stay sleeping not making a sound.
I pull away reluctantly totally and completely breathless. That was so perfect. Your lips are so soft.
Then I hear you begin to say something,
"Thank you"
My eyes go wide. Are you awake?
You smile. Your eyes open.
"Thank you" You say once again.
'Oh Kami'I think, 'Why does this stuff always happen to me!!
I groan and look down to hide my face blushing.
What now Ami? What now?