Authoresses and OC's (note that the script used for each one is what each Elf of Darkness writes)
Elara Black - Nuiniachwen
Shina Blue - Erenriel
Mira Myrra - Luinramwen
(Magnesium Sulphate - Morriel - does not write)
Disclaimer - We have been plotting for ages how it would be possible to yoink the Marauders from JK. No luck. For one, we can't even afford a plane ticket to England, nor the expensive weaponry, which would be a bitch to smuggle on the plane anyhow. Drat the luck!
---CH. 2---
Elara was about to eat another Fizzing Whizzbee that she had planned on saving for later when she finally began to look at the people that had floated up to the ceiling too.
"OK...Who do I know here..." Elara said thoughtfully. "That's Mira, and that's Shina, and there's Maggie..." Elara waved at Maggie, who waved back. Elara looked around and saw someone else. She dropped the Fizzing Whizzbee in shock.
"SIRIUS!" Elara yelled, trying to figure out how to get to him. Sirius turned, and looked as shocked as Elara did.
"I didn't know you came to Hogwarts!" said Sirius.
"You weren't payin' atttention during the Sorting were you?!" Elara said, grinning. "I made the doors open!"
"Yea, with help from me!" said Maggie. She kicked off of the ceiling and tucked into a ball, somersaulting through the air. She continued in a straight line until she hit Shina and was bounced in the opposite direction. "So you're Elara's cousin? Cool! Do you like blowing things up too?"
"Of course!" laughed Sirius as he walked upside down on the ceiling. "And the prettier the colours and the louder the noise the better!"
Meanwhile, when he had been hit by Maggie, Shina had been propelled backwards - and into Remus Lupin.
"Oops, sorry!" she apologized sheepishly, blushing furiously. They both blushed and pushed off each other in the direction towards their separate set of friends.
"Help!" yelled Mira. "I'm stuck in the stars. Hey - wait - I'm a star! Cool!" She did a whirling somersault and started singing. "When I'm up I can't get down, can't get down, can't get level, when I'm up I can't get down, get my feet back on the ground -"
Shina joined in. "Broken angel, take that plane and fingerpaint the sky - till everything shines!" She pulled out her wand, and with a flick, managed to produced a can of shiny blue paint from nowhere. Shina stuck her fingers in the paint and began playing connect-the-dots with the constellations.
Elara did a somersault as well, and a supersized bottle of shampoo fell out of her pocket onto the students below. "Oh, sh -" She cut herself off when Dumbledore gave her The Look.
The bottle of shampoo conked the greasy haired kid, "Snape, Severus," on the head and knocked him out cold.
"Oh yeah! Bullseye! I mean - uh - oooops..." Elara corrected herself hurriedly, then tumbled away to hide behind Maggie and Mira. Dumbledore continued to glare at her.
Peter shot by, squeaking and flailing at the air as the Sorting Hat tumbled rapidly after him, singing a demonic song to torture annoying first years. (It was the Barney theme song, but Peter didn't know that. He wouldn't have known who Barney was even if he had known. All he knew was it terrified him)
"I drew a shiny blue turtle!" announced Shina.
Dumbledore drew a rabbit by connecting several different constellations. "My goodness, I haven't had this much fun in years!"
"Is dinner always this entertaining?" a first-year Ravenclaw called up to those floating around the ceiling.
"I dunno. How often do people eat Fizzing Whizzbees with their dinner here?" Elara yelled back.
"I don't know, it's my first year!" The Ravenclaw yelled.
"Same here!" Elara yelled, then waved and decided to teach the Hat a good song, in an effort to make the Sorting Hat stop singing the stupid Barney theme song. (In fact, most first years were scared out of their minds by the Sorting Hat's song. Elara was going to teach the Hat 'The Song That Gets On Everybody's Nerves' but she thought better of it.)
Shina suddenly looked alarmed. "Oh no!" she shrieked. "I'm sinking!"
Indeed, she was slowly falling back towards the earth. So was everyone else.
"Oh no! I can't stop falling!" Mira cried.
Elara grabbed at the air and flapped her arms in a desperate attempt to stay afloat. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" she cussed. Dumbledore glared at her. "Meep! Um, cluck, cluck, cluck?"
Dumbledore gave her a Look that said, "Oh, suuuure. Right. But as it's your first day I won't give you a detention. Yet."
"More Fizzing Whizzbees!" yelled Maggie. "Please! No! I was having fun! I don't want to fall!"
Mira stretched out in midair and crossed her arms behind her head. "Wake me when we hit the ground. Actually, on second thought, don't, I'd rather be spared the pain for a few moments at least. " And with that she fell promptly asleep.
Peter and Remus exchanged looks as they sort of tumbled upside down. "And I thought she was normal, and quiet," Peter whispered.
"What've you been smoking?" Remus snickered. "She nearly flattened me when she tackled the bench after she was Sorted. Normal would be abnormal."
Shina frantically searched the pockets of her robes for any more Fizzing Whizzbees, finally coming up with two half-pieces. "Yes!"
However, she was immediately tackled by half the other Gryffindor first years wanting the candy so they could stay up longer, her friends included. Mira, however, slept on, oblivious.
A sleeping person to a prankster is the perfect target. All of a sudden a burst of blue light from the middle of the crowd of people fighting for Whizzbees streaked through the air, hit Mira, and turned the small girl bright blue. No one noticed as of yet.
Elara floated higher as everyone else fell down lower. Somehow, inexplicably, she had managed to obtain both half-pieces of Shina's last Fizzing Whizzbees. Elara snickered. "Hehe. I'm goin' up and you're not!"
Shina glared at Elara. "You owe me Fizzing Whizzbees!"
Elara shrugged, grabbed the can of shiny blue paint, and started to decide which stars to play connect-the-dots with first. The Elara thought of something she should ask about.
"Heys. Umm...Before I get any higher, who exactly turned Mira blue?"
"I don't know!" Sirius said innocently. Elara gave him the Look that said, "Right. And I'm gonna believe you why?"
"I swear, I didn't do it Elara!"
"I have the last piece of Fizzing Whizzbee! Tell me the truth, and I'll give it to you!"
"It was me!" chorused the four boys and Shina. They began a mid-air wrestling match as they sank to the ground.
"OW! She BIT me!" Remus howled. Shina laughed maniacally and punched James in the face.
"It was mine to begin with!" Shina laughed insanely. "It should be mine by default!"
"She drew blood," Remus whimpered, holding up his hand.
Mira woke up as a random hex hit her.
"CHEAT!" howled James, holding his nose. Mira's ears began to sing 'Run Runaway'.
"Ow! F!!! that's loud!" She shook her head, going slightly cross-eyed from the force, and stared at the wrestling match taking place now only a few feet above everyone's heads. "Ummm....I think I missed something...."
"OW!" yelled Remus again. "Now both hands are bleeding!"
Mira sort of swam through the air to where Remus was floating. "I could try to heal 'em," she offered.
"Thanks...."
Mira tried to remember how the spell went. She muttered something, and Remus' hands were turned into teapots. He yelped in shock.
"Shit. Sorry. That wasn't supposed to happen...but at least they're no longer bleeding...And they'll make good weapons in the fight!"
Before long, Remus was back in the midst of it all, bonking his friends with his teapot hands.
Elara was out of range of Remus, so she pointed and laughed.
Shina had been knocked out and landed face first in a bowl of chocolate pudding. Mmmmmm....
"STOP!" yelled Dumbledore, still floating several feet above the brawl. No one stopped. Frustrated, the Headmaster threw down the Sorting Hat, which got caught in the melee. Yelling and cursing could be heard from the Hat. Thus, the Hat, which had been in near-perfect condition up till then, was transformed into the tattered and woebegone thing it is more well-known as, many years in the future.
Elara looked down at the brawl below her. "HEY! Now they're beating on a poor hat - the Sorting Hat! OK. This has gone too far." Elara pushed her hair out of her face, getting shiny blue paint in her hair. "Charge!" Elara shrieked, threw the can of blue paint down ("!##!!!" screamed the Hat) and tried to get to the fight. Elara tried to somersault to get down.
"F!CK!" muttered Elara after her sad attempt to get down to the fight failed. Then she got an idea. She held up the half-piece of Fizzing Whizzbee, and muttered something, then grinned as the candy multiplied.
"Fizzing Whizzbees for everyone!" Elara yelled, throwing down the Fizzing Whizzbees. ('Hell. If I can't get to the fight, I'll bring it to me!') One of the Whizzbees bounced off of the back of Dumbledore's head.
"Oops!" Elara said as the Headmaster turned to glare at her. "Umm...I didn't mean to. I was umm...trying to stop the fight!"
"With more Fizzing Whizzbees?" asked Dumbledore, raising one of his eyebrows.
"Well, that's what they wanted right?" Elara said, trying to figure out who to hit with something next. ('That Snape was a good target....')
"Food fight!" Shina yelled as she came to and tossed a spoonful of mashed potatoes at Snape in the net table. Why the Slytherin and Gryffindor tables are side by side is beyond me, it's like they're asking for a food fight.
Snape snarled and tossed a fistful of peas in her direction - which hit Frank Longbottom in the forehead. Longbottom retaliated by getting Malfoy with creme corn. James ducked a piece of chicken and got Rodolphus Lestrange with a piece of pumpkin pie. Hufflepuff, not wanting to be left out, joined in and began pelting Ravenclaws with jellybeans and carrots. The Ravenclaws, not wanting to be outdone, levitated a big vat of gravy and upended it on the Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors.
Not wishing to be left out, the other still-floating Gryffindors grabbed up food from the table and began sniping off unsuspecting Slytherins. Mira beaned the large and slow Crabbe and Goyle (literally). Elara happily pelted whatever Slytherins she saw with some of Hagrid's rock cakes, which he had donated for the feast - not that they were being eaten, they'd break your teeth. But Elara had found a perfect use for them: ammunition. Maggie, unwilling to be outdone, stole some Fizzing Whizzbees, grabbed a whole chicken, ate the Whizzbees, and floated over to drop it on Bellatrix Black's head. The chicken knocked her out cold, and bounced to hit the recently-regained-consciousness Snape. He was knocked out for the second time that evening. (Poor guy. You almost feel sorry for him - NOT!)
Soon the Great Hall was a flying mess of food. Yelling, screaming, cursing (and in the case of Mira's ears, still singing 'Run Runaway') and laughter filled the Hall. Elara actually glimpsed a few of the younger teachers occasionally pelting a student, then turning to either glare disprovingly or whistle innocently as Dumbledore looked in their direction.
Mira ducked a glob of something green (coleslaw, she decided, definitely coleslaw -) and dumped a bowl of mushroom soup down the back of some Slytherin's robes. Laughing maniacally, she went back to the table for more ammunition. If this was Hogwarts, it was certainly an extremely entertaining place.
Remus loaded up ladles with mashed potatoes to flick at the others. With Peter, alternately loading and shooting, they bombarded several unlucky kids who'd nearly run out of ammunition.
Sirius flung whatever food came to hand, regardless of who he hit. When Shina was smacked in the head by a wayward steack, he quickly altered position to the other side of the table and pretended not to notice Shina's suspicious look.
James was involved in a duel with breadsticks, with som kid who was so covered in food it was impossible to recognize them. However, the kid refused to give up and repeatedly poked James with their breadstick 'weapon' until James collapsed in giggles, being extremely ticklish.
Shina retaliated by picking up a gravyboat and dumping it over Sirius' head.
Maggie picked up two large pieces of broccoli and used them to daub blue paint from the miraculously unspilled can on anything that moved.
Order was not restored for a very long time - no one could control the mayhem. And so the food fight raged on....