He misses her. He tells her so. She turns away.
He can't find the words to explain himself to her. She's right - he knows it - and she has every right to pull away, but part of him still refuses to understand. He thinks of their history, their time spent together, and knows he gave it up because he had to, while she's giving it up because she wants to.
Most of time he spends sulking, especially at home, and he knows Lauren is getting fed up with his attitude.
"What's bothering you, Michael?" she asks constantly, and he keeps quiet. There's no way to explain what he's going through.
She knows, of course, that he's had other girlfriends before her. He even told her about Sydney, in one of their early dates, when she asked why he hesitated going out with her so. He explained the dead girlfriend situation, and made a promise to himself to let her go, to focus on Lauren, because she's nice and blond and cheery and that's exactly what he needs.
He tells himself the same now, and that Lauren's a good woman and doesn't deserve him cheating on her because she's been nothing but loyal - but nothing works, and this time around he can't make himself pretend Sydney's not around.
He looks away as Lauren slowly gives up, but one day, she demands that he look at her and tell her if he still loves her.
He looks, but fails to speak, and spends yet another night on the couch.
-
Sydney still keeps her distance and every day it becomes harder, so he works exactly 9 to 5 and tries to spend his time with Lauren, to make it up for her, to keep the vows he spoke when he married her.
It's hard, and every time he's with Lauren and thinks about Sydney he feels a little guilty, but finds that he can't help comparing them to each other.
Lauren is a strong woman - though not as strong as Sydney - and works with computers for a living. She's smart - he knows - and well respected by her colleagues - maybe more than she is by her husband.
He's been with her to a few business dinners, where she spoke of her work with passion - he could see that even though he knows nothing about computers and understands none of the work she does - and easily added more clients to the company she works for.
He's also been with her to a few "fun" nights - her friends and their husbands and dancing and drinking - and saw that her friends adore and love her, yet couldn't stop comparing it to the way Will and Francie and Dixon and Marshall and even Danny and Emily Sloane - he's heard stories - adored Sydney and her every move.
Lauren calls him Michael, and it stings because the people who matter call him Vaughn. Lauren thinks he works for a bank, and he can't share any aspect of his work with her. Lauren thinks his old girlfriend has been dead for two years, and he can't correct the mistake.
-
When another day goes by and once again Sydney keeps her professional face, giving him papers and walking away, barely a good morning, not to mention a smile, he stops at the gym on his way home, furious, and takes out his frustrations on a punching bag. Then he goes home and makes love to Lauren, slowly, as if trying to prove some sick point - I can live without you, Sydney, for example - and falls asleep, pushing her out of his mind and hugging his wife to his stiff form.