Pretty Little Boy
'Look Away'
Sora lay across the plush carpet of his room, cradling his chin in his crossed arms as he listened to the CD player and its soothing tune. It was familiar... And yet it was funny how such a horridly tragic opera could somehow be so soothing.
Perhaps it was the belief that Sora's life could never be as bad as the life of Eric, the 'phantom.' Sora wasn't physically scarred. He didn't have to spend his life in a mask... Yes, Sora assured himself. His life was perfect compared to the tragic life of the poor phantom.
...Remember me once in a while,
Please promise me you'll try.
When you find that once again you long
To take your heart back and be free,
If you ever find a moment,
Spare a thought for me...
The past few weeks had been great... Sora was sure they had been. He had so much fun with Riku and the older boy just radiated confidence and assurance in everything he did. There was no way possible for Sora to doubt himself if Riku just gave him a nod of approval. But at the same time...
Sora wasn't oblivious to everything around him. He saw Cloud's concern, which was only growing day by day. He saw Kairi's looks she shot him during class when Sora was goofing off with Riku. He knew he was leaving some of the best friends of his life in the dust, but there was absolutely nothing he felt he could do about it. Riku was leading him on some blind journey that Sora was only too willing to go on, no matter what he had to give up along the way. The thought itself just scared Sora... but he couldn't do anything about it.
Suddenly, Sora was jolted out of his thoughts by an abrupt knock on his door, looking up as Cloud slipped into his room.
"Sora, I brought you some dinner. Mom's gonna be out late again." Cloud offered the bowl in his hand to Sora, but paused as he heard the music drifting up from the stereo in front of his younger brother, a small smile flickering onto his face. "Hey... You still have that CD. I thought we'd lost it."
Sora couldn't help but give Cloud a broad grin of his own in return as he took the bowl of ravioli. "Yeah, I still have it."
The blond teenager sat down next to Sora, not bothering to ask for the younger boy's permission to stay in his room. Lately, Cloud had learned that it was just easier to do things without asking Sora's permission. His recent responses had been way too smart-ass for his own good, so Cloud had pretty much just given up with petty requests altogether.
Thankfully, Sora didn't snap at his older brother, instead stirring his ravioli around before spooning several small pieces into his mouth, chewing softly as he listened to the music. The CD had switch from the lulling tune Sora had set it to, now pounding out a steadier rhythm, the singers all in perfect harmony, carrying out the haunting melody in perfection. But who would expect any less from professionals who had spent their lives working for that perfection, driving their voices into the right pitch, forcing confidence into their every sung word?
Both brothers sat in silence for what felt like the longest time, and Sora had long since finished his dinner when Cloud finally spoke, his voice quiet so as not to totally shatter the pensive mood.
"It was a good play, wasn't it?"
"Awesome play."
"Only one we ever got to see."
"I wouldn't want to see another."
At this Cloud turned slightly to Sora, studying him with a curious gaze. "Why not?"
"If... If it didn't live up to the Phantom of the Opera, I'd just feel let down."
Cloud nodded slowly, thinking the words over and letting the music mix in with them. It had probably been twelve years ago that he and Sora had been allowed to attend one of their father's plays. He had owned a large theater on the other side of the island and always made a fairly decent profit. The Phantom of the Opera was the play that Cloud and Sora had gotten to see... the only play they had gotten to see... before their parents' divorce.
The weird thing was that neither of the boys really liked opera at all. It was just one of the many soothing memories they had to visit.
"Hey, Sora, do you--"
The ring of the phone cut of Cloud's voice and Sora pulled himself off of the floor, picking the phone up from his beside table and holding it to his ear. Cloud didn't even bother asking who it was as he let out a deep sigh. Sora's previously glum face had turned into one of pure happiness as soon as he'd heard the voice on the other end of the line. So of course that meant it could only be one person...
"Sure thing, Riku! I'll be there!" Sora paused, listening to Riku's voice, hardly noticing as Cloud dragged himself to his feet and rolled his eyes, making his way out of his younger brother's room. "Yep! Okay, see ya then!"
Moments later, the brunette tore out of his room, nearly sending himself flying face-first towards the floor as he tripped over a rug. Flailing his arms wildly, Sora regained his balance and burst into the living room, finding Cloud lounging on the sofa there, hand poised above the remote to the small TV in the corner.
"Hey, Cloud!"
"Hi."
"Can I have some money for the ferry?"
Cloud pretended to be intently focusing on the television screen, though he was inwardly trying to build up a good argument. These conversations always led to arguments. Perhaps if he could prepare for once, he might stand a chance...
"Cloud!"
"What?!"
"I asked if I could use some money to buy a ferry ticket. Riku and I are going--"
Cloud gritted his teeth and tried to do his best to keep from just snapping completely at that point. "Sora, you know what I'm gonna say."
"..."
"I already told you that if you want money to do stuff with Riku, you'd better look somewhere else." Cloud hesitated then, the next part being his least favorite of any of the arguments the two brothers ever had. "I don't like Riku. He's... not the best person to hang around, you know?"
Sure enough, Cloud's words hit some drastically vital part of Sora's heart, for the younger boys blue eyes narrowed dangerously and his mouth was not drawn into a friendly pout-- just a deep scowl.
"No, I don't know. I don't even know why you think he's a bad person! Honestly, Cloud! Mom gives you the money so you can be in charge of it, but that doesn't mean you're the only one who gets to use it!" Cloud wasn't looking at Sora, and it only served to make the younger boy even angrier.
It was as though Cloud simply existed to make his life a living hell.
Cloud, meanwhile, was still frantically building up the words he hadn't wanted to say for so long. How exactly does one go about telling their younger brother that they think that his friend is a conniving, manipulative, bastard-child? Alright, perhaps Riku wasn't as bad as Cloud made him out to be. The blonde had even told himself multiple times that he did not know the boy that well, so he couldn't serve to be the judge of the other boy's personality. But... something about Riku just bothered Cloud to no ends.
It was as though Riku simply existed to make his life a living hell.
The arguing went back and forth, but as usual, it didn't last long. Cloud assured himself that Sora would be fine, because he always was fine, and despite all of Cloud's bad feelings, nothing bad ever happened. So Cloud caved. He gave Sora the amount of money he would need to by a round ticket on the ferry and made his younger promise to be back by midnight.
It seemed that every weekend had been like that recently... Cloud pretty much had his life revolving around giving his younger permission to go out with Riku as long as he was back by a certain time.
Minutes later, once Sora had changed clothes and brushed his hair hurriedly, the front door slammed shut and Cloud was once again alone. But he was still okay. Cloud was always okay.
It was Sora he was worried about, anyway.
-------
"Wow! Riku! This is... This is..." Sora stared around him, eyes glowing with excitement. "This is amazing..."
Lights were everywhere are them, neon signs happily welcoming the boys to the mainland that Destiny Islands sat just a few miles out from. The entire spectrum could be found dancing around in the sky as every color Sora had never imagined laughed and spun around, making the entire city light up cheerily. Noise, music, laughter... It was all here, all compressed into that one moment as Sora clung onto Riku's arm, mostly to keep himself from bursting with sheer excitement.
A cocky grin adorned Riku's face as he ruffled Sora's brown locks playfully with one hand, using the other to grab the boy's wrist and drag him along. "Glad you like it, Sora! But if you don't hurry up, we're going to be late."
"Where are we going?"
"The club I told you about, don't you remember?"
This caused Sora to let out a squeak of dismay, his voice turning into the adorable whine that usually got him his way in any situation. "But Rikuuuu... I'm not dressed for dancing! Besides, I don't even know how to--"
Riku simply rolled his eyes, leading Sora down a darkened alley, the lights slowly fading away behind them along with the laughter and merriment. "You look fine for this sort of club, trust me. Besides, we're not doing any dancing." As an afterthought, Riku smirked and said over his shoulder, "Though, if you'd like to learn how to dance, I'll always be more than willing to teach you, Sora. We could make it... fun."
Eyes widening, Sora was glad for the growing darkness. At least it hid his blush from Riku, who would probably just make fun of him for it... But...
The darkness wasn't entirely welcoming.
Here, the damp brick walls of the building surrounding them scraped against Sora's arms if he happened to stumble over something cluttered along the ground. But ahead of him, Riku's silver hair and pale skin stood out against the darkness engulfing them and Sora forced himself to stay calm and not bolt, no matter how much he wanted to run back to the brightly colored city he'd arrived at only moments ago.
Riku knew what he was doing. He always did.
Trust him.
Pause on that situation for a moment, just as Riku is in mid leap to avoid the puddle standing in the middle of their path. Sora is of course, blindly following behind, unaware of the impending flood his shoes are about to experience and unaware of where he's going. It could be speculated that Sora was being his normal innocent self and that trusting people was just what he did. And yet as time slowly begins to roll forward again, Sora's feet slam against the surface of the water, breaking through and hitting the concrete beneath. And as time returns to its normal self, it is also speculated that with that one step, something has changed in Sora.
Trust him.
Trust him.
Trust him.
Water sprayed out around both boys as they ran on, a grin on Sora's face as he simply allowed himself to be led blindly away from the hubbub of the city streets. And moments later, though the two were far away even by that point, the pond was still rippling and trembling, dirt and dust from the ground swirling around inside, trying to escape its watery prison.
As more moments passed, the filth settled once again, the puddle once again getting a grasp on that smooth and flawless surface, all the dirt beneath it looking as though it was simply part of the concrete.
But it still didn't look like it had before.
-------
If Sora had thought that the alley was dark, he had quickly changed his mind about it as soon as he set foot in the building Riku had gotten them into.
It was a club, but it looked like it had been abandoned for years. Long gone was the bubbly city Sora had first set his eyes on after stepping off the ferry, for Riku had led him to an older part of town that had long since been forgotten in the new development and changing culture that the mainland cities experienced all the time.
What Riku had meant when he had said that the new club was opening up, was that it was simply a new location in an old club. When Riku had first explained that to him, Sora couldn't help but cock his head to the side quizzically, for he still just wasn't getting it. Why didn't Riku just tell him that in the first place?
But that and any other questions Sora's mind may had concocted were quickly shoved into the back of his mind as Riku's warm hand took his again, guiding the younger boy through the narrow hallway before coming to what must have once been the dance floor of the club. Light fixtures still hung from the ceiling, though dust had long since gone and turned the rafters and the lighting into its home, cobwebs turning the corners of the ceiling into a shadowy mist.
Sora felt as though he'd suddenly stepped into some haunted house right out of a storybook.
"Riku, where are we--?"
"Shh..." Sora felt Riku's thumb gently rubbing against the back of his hand in small circles, soothing away the questions bubbling up inside the younger boy and replacing them with simple joy. "You'll find out in a sec, okay?"
Sure enough, in the few moments it took for the pair to cross the large room, a door opened at the far end of the dance floor and a pale light spilled out across the dusky ground, nearly blinding Sora, who had grown accustomed to all the darkness. Since the light was hardly that bright at all though, his blue eyes quickly adjusted and came to rest on the figure who was laughing good naturedly as he clapped Riku on the back, ushering both him and Sora into the smaller room.
The man had silver hair that ran down to his mid back, tied into a ponytail with a simple black ribbon that almost seemed to get lost in the tendrils of silver everywhere. Much like Riku, the silver hair was accompanied by pale skin, which Sora was definitely able to see more than enough of do to the tight black shirt which only covered half of the man's chest, leaving the rest of his smooth stomach exposed before the black leather pants came in the way.
"Kuja! Good to see you!" Riku laughed as the Kuja punched him playfully in the arm.
"Riku, where've you been lately? I didn't think it was like you to let a simple thing like an expulsion get in the way of our..." Kuja trailed off as his gaze rested on Sora, who stood half hid behind Riku. "Oh? And who's this? You brought a little friend to visit us, Riku?"
Turning back towards Sora, Riku gave the younger boy a reassuring smile which could melt ice, guiding him forward to stand beside him. Returning his attention to Kuja, though still holding one arm wrapped around Sora's shoulders, Riku grinned. "His name's Sora and no, you can't play with him, Kuja." Rolling his eyes as a dramatic sigh erupted from Kuja, Riku added, "He's from Destiny Islands. Unlike the rest of the population at that eyesore of a school, he's got guts."
"And looks to boot," Kuja said with a wicked grin. "Too bad you won't let me have my fun, Riku, you old stick in the mud. You haven't even introduced the little kitten to the rest of our crew! Where are your manners?"
It was then that Sora noticed just how many people were in the room. Small clusters of people were talking amongst themselves in hushed voices, hardly anyone paying attention to the blue eyed brunette now standing in the doorway. There were snippets of chuckles and snickers at whatever conversation was being exchanged and anything that could possibly be used for seating was already being occupied. One person in particular caught his attention, sitting apart from the rest of the group with his eyes rooted on Kuja, dirty blond bangs covering most of his face.
Following Sora's gaze, Riku smiled warmly at him and nudged Sora gently in the side. "That's Zidane, Kuja's boyfriend. Why don't you go make friends? I have to talk to Kuja about something for a minute, okay?"
Sora grinned, feeling his knees nearly buckle as Riku brushed his lips softly against his cheek, ushering him forward with a small push from the small of his back before Riku turned to Kuja once again. Meanwhile, Sora cheerfully made his way towards Zidane, realizing as he got closer that the boy couldn't be much older than Sora himself, though Kuja appeared to be in his early twenties at least.
As Sora drew closer to him, Zidane slowly drew his eyes away from Kuja, instead planting them on the boy in front of him. "Oh, sorry, I didn't see you there." His voice seemed quiet, much like the voices of the rest of the room. Ohh... They probably aren't supposed to be in this old abandoned building, huh? Guess I sorta should've figured that out earlier.
"Hey." Sora's voice dropped to a quiet level as well, not even needing to be told the exact reasoning behind it. Proud of himself for figuring it out on his own and probably not caring as much as he should about the fact that they weren't supposed to be there, Sora sat cross legged on the floor in front of Zidane, which held none of the dust that the rest of the building did.
"Let me guess, you're new here, right?"
"Yeah... Riku brought me."
Zidane raised his eyebrows at this statement, a small grin flitting across his lips. "Huh. You must be something pretty special then. He usually never brings outsiders, or anyone else with him for that matter."
Before he could even question the words that had come out of Zidane's mouth, Kuja spoke up from the far end of the room, this time at a normal volume.
"Ten o'clock, everyone, you know what that means!" Grinning broadly as the simple proclamation was met with claps and cheers, Kuja strode over towards where Sora and Zidane sat, taking Zidane in his arms and pulling him forward quickly into a more-than-friendly hug, his pale hands clamped tightly around the smaller boy's waist.
"Sora." Jolting as he felt Riku's hand descend on his shoulder, Sora turned around to face his silver-haired friend, the rest of the room's slowly rising chaos suddenly only background noise. As always, Riku was the focus now, Riku was at the center of Sora's tiny little universe.
"Riku, what is this place?"
"Just a hangout for some of my old friends. I told you it moves around from place to place, you know."
"Oh..."
Smiling warmly, Riku slid his arms around Sora's waist, turning the smaller boy to face him as opposed to the rest of the room. Somewhere in the back of Sora's mind, he became numbly aware of the fact that the level of noise in the room was definitely growing, but he couldn't exactly pinpoint why, or what the noise was. There was only Riku again.
"You're not afraid, are you?" Riku murmured into Sora's ear hands still protectively wrapped around his waist.
Sora closed his eyes, reveling in the practically non-existent distance between them. From there he could feel the breath steadily puffing out from Riku's mouth. He could hear the heartbeat of the older boy and it was more than just a reassurance that Riku was still alive and with him. It meant that as long as that steady beat kept playing in his eardrums, Sora could trust Riku to be sure of himself, because surely his heart had that confidence by itself.
"No, I'm not afraid."
There was more noise pouring into Sora's ears, trying to get a purchase on the rocky slopes of his mind, but it just wasn't working. He knew the noise was there and somewhere he just knew something was wrong, but Riku was right there in front of him and he was by far more intoxicating and fascinating than anything that could possibly be going on around him.
So when Riku pulled a small object out of his pocket and held it up to Sora's mouth warily, Sora's only question was why there had been a spark of fear in Riku's eyes. It was a simple white pill, made into the shape of a heart but no bigger than Sora's thumbnail. Contrary to what the rest of the world chose to believe about Sora, he was not by any means completely oblivious as to what that pill was.
But contrary to what the rest of the world continued to believe about Sora, he suddenly wanted that pill. The idea of experiencing that high that he knew came along with it was actually dancing around in his head, embracing the notion that Riku trusted Sora enough to have it and not squeal about it later. Riku trusted him.
Opening his mouth with a small smile, Riku grinned before gently placing the small white pill on his tongue Sora's mouth closing as soon as the other boy's hands had returned to his sides. A bitter taste erupted in Sora's mouth almost instantly, though Sora had no time to make a face or even to react at all to it because it was gone in a flash and replaced with the sweetest thing Sora had ever tasted.
And it was everywhere.
Sugar coated everything around him and anywhere he looked was sparkling and glistening with a beautiful ethereal glow. Gone was the dark and dingy room Riku had led Sora to, replaced by brilliant dancing lights and moving shapes, all flitting around Sora's vision at lightning speed. And there was Riku, in front of him, on him, everywhere around him. Dimly aware of hands sliding up his hips, Sora concluded that they must be Riku's. But there was another pair of hands at his waist before the first pair had left... Just how many people were on him?!
But no matter where Sora looked, there was just Riku and just Riku's hands. Just Riku's warmth. Riku, Riku, Riku, and a rainbow of color weaving its merry little way around the room, casting a radiant light on anything in its path. The noise was there and Sora couldn't avoid it any longer. Muted whispers and groans, erotic sounds of pleasure that Sora had certainly never heard before.
Where was he??
Sora felt Riku's lips slide across his own, and he suddenly stopped caring.
-------
Cloud sighed deeply, finally turning the TV off halfheartedly. That would mean that the house would be quiet (again) and he would return to being alone (again). Neither of the two facts really appealed much to the blond, but there wasn't much to be done about either. The only thing that ever played on the TV was another version of something on a different channel. It was as though all the script writers of the world had run out of ideas and the best they could do was change the names of their victims, plunging them into the same syndicated plotline over and over again.
It was twelve-thirty.
Cloud was more than just a little sure that he'd told Sora to be home by midnight.
With a groan, Cloud closed his eyes, cradling his head in his hands. How the hell was he supposed to deal with his younger brother?! Ever since this jackass Riku had shown up, Sora had just gone from being the cheerful and occasionally annoying kid brother he'd always been and had turned into some bitchy and hormone crazed brat.
What had ever happened to the sweet old Sora?
Standing up from the battered old sofa in the living room, Cloud shuffled into the kitchen. It probably wasn't wise to drown out his worries and sorrows in ice cream... The realization hit him like a handful of mud. Of course, adding on to all the other layers of mud Cloud was metaphorically covered with, it really wasn't all that much.
So it was that Cloud found himself standing in the middle of his kitchen, clenching and unclenching his fingers because there was nothing more he could do... right? That doubtful question wouldn't leave him alone. There was always something that could be done. There had to be.
Right?
-------
Riku led a rather giddy Sora out of the run-down club shortly before two in the morning, a ridiculous grin on his face. Without a doubt, that had been one of the most memorable experiences in his entire life.
And Sora was still feeling it.
Laughing softly, the brunette slid his hand into Riku's once again savoring the warmth of the other boy. Granted, Sora's body still felt a little... odd, but with all the gorgeous color still invading his vision and with Riku right there beside him... Sora had absolutely no qualms about the whole ordeal.
The two boys emerged from the alley they had disappeared down several hours ago, laughing happily and walking briskly together. Anyone who looked at them probably would've seen two friends who had just had a great time somewhere and were now simply trying to make it back to the docks before the ferry left. And they were partly right, really. But no one seemed to notice the slight stagger in Sora's step, or the way his eyes constantly darted around him, the boy seeming absolutely entranced by nothing at all.
It must have simply been the radiance of the city at night, they all told themselves as Riku and Sora walked by. And they never had a second thought about it.
And as Riku and Sora jogged onto the ferry just before the bell rang and it pulled slowly away from the docks, no one took any notice of how Sora stumbled and nearly fell. He didn't fall, anyway. Perhaps if he'd hit the deck of the ferry, then people would've noticed. But Riku grabbed Sora's shoulder, steadying him with a chuckle before leading him to the safety rail of the ferry, looking out at city of lights which was quickly growing smaller and smaller in the distance.
-------
"Yeah, Leon, I know..."
"And you're not even supposed to be acting like his father," Leon drawled into the phone. Cloud had decided to pester him at two thirty in the morning. Definitely not the best decision on Cloud's part, but once Leon had realized what an absolutely shitty mood his friend was in, he eased up on Cloud a bit. "Maybe if he saw you as his brother again instead of some... parental replacement?"
"I guess..."
Leon sighed into the receiver as he sat up in his bed, still trying to pull his find out of its sleep-fogged world. "Listen, it isn't your fault, okay? You're responsible for Sora to a degree, but you can't go picking his friends for him. He's going to make some stupid mistakes in life. But he's got to be the one to learn from them."
"But what if he gets hurt??"
"Then you help him recover and get through it. But you can't do everything for him."
-------
The ferry came to rest at the docks of Destiny Islands on schedule as always. A few people trickled off of it and onto the docks, but not many. There were very few people on the islands who were up at that hour, much less running around the docks. ...Riku and Sora were two of those people.
Stepping off onto the wooden planks leading up to the ferry, Sora giggled at something Riku whispered into his ear, a smirk upon the older boy's face. It was perfect, it was sweet, and the lingering ecstasy still managed to have a slight hold on Sora, tiny orbs of light now all that remained of the previous explosion of color.
-------
"I just don't know, Leon. ...I get so mad at Riku just for being here. Is it really his fault that Sora's acting this way?"
"..."
"...Leon?"
"I'm not sure if it's really anyone's fault."
-------
Yellow sneakers squeaked against the damp boards of the dock. It must've rained while Sora and Riku were gone that night...
A sudden jolt of pain in Sora's head caused the brunette to yelp and jerk to a stop, the rubber soles of his shoes sliding against the slick wood. With another shout, Sora completely lost his balance, frantically flailing his arms around in search of anything he could grab to keep from simply falling off the docks. But everything was still so blurry...
"Sora!" Instinctively, Riku reached out to catch him, though Sora was already too frantic to do much other than cling to Riku as both of them toppled over the docks, slamming into the water below.
-------
"Do you think he'll be okay?"
"Well..."
-------
Everything was spinning around Sora. He couldn't see Riku, though he distinctly remembered falling into the water with him. There was no light to see by, just endless darkness stretching in all directions, a shower of bubbles dancing in front of his eyes mockingly. Which way was the way to the surface?
The small balls of light were still there in Sora's vision and as his lungs screamed plaintively for air, the only thing Sora saw was the illusion in front of him. And the only thing the lights would say to him were two words, sung out into the water with laughter.
Trust him.
-------
"I... don't really know, Cloud. But it's really up to him."
..................................................................
Okay! Tons of things to say and I don't want to take up too much of your time, so if I could just have a minute or two, I'd be very thankful.
I think the first and most important thing is that I should use a few sentences to act as a health teacher and say that what happened in this chapter was bad and I certainly am not approving of how it all played out. Don't do drugs. Thank you.
Moving on past that, I haven't updated this sucker in a lifetime. (Then again, I haven't updated anything in a lifetime...) I mean... Sheesh. But here it is: the long-lost fourth chapter. I got some not-so-good inspiration to write, so that's why I turned to writing the one unhappy fic I have going to date. Yay?
I'm planning on keeping this the same length as WIWYL, so that means it's got another three chapters to go and that's it. (I'll be so glad to get rid of this thing.) And last but not least, I am really sorry about leaving you all hanging like that. I'm going to get the next chapter up very soon, so please don't freak out about anything just yet!
--Ori