No More Blood

by Wicked R

Buffy finds out the reason behind the mad behaviour of Spike and thinks of the one person in the whole wide world who would know what it feels like for Spike to have a soul. As Angel arrives, she has to deal with her confused emotional state regarding the

Title: No More Blood

Author: Wicked Rita

Disclaimers: Sure (Mutant Enemy)

Universe: season 4 AtS, sometime after "Habeas Corpses"; and somewhere around the beginning of season 7 BtVS. Spoilers accordingly.

Genre: Angst/Romance, sub-genre: Hurt/Comfort.

Pairing: A/C, B/S

Summary: Buffy finds out the reason behind the mad behaviour of Spike and thinks of the one person in the whole wide world who would know what it feels like for Spike to have a soul. As Angel arrives, she has to deal with her confused emotional state regarding the two souled vampires in her life.

Distribution: let me know where.

Warning: not beta read. English is not my first language, so be kind.

Note: ok, imagine two vampires fighting. One of them had a few cups of pigs' blood the previous day, the other about a person worth of human blood. Which one is going to be stronger? Ever thought of that? The story is based on this idea.

It was the first phone call Angel received from Buffy for years. It was a short one too. She asked him about Connor. It was Cordelia who talked to her a few months back about his son's existence. A short phone call, that one too. After a long shared silence Buffy revealed the reason behind the call. He will think about it, he said, and hung up.

Angel never called back to tell the Scoobies he was going to go down after all. If he wanted to be there the same night, he would have to hurry before the Sun came up. He had a lot of time thinking about it driving on the straight, empty road. Spike with a soul. What he felt was remorse. All the bad, Spike ever did, was his, well, Angelus's fault. That is WILLIAM, or what is left of William, the poet, and the man of emotions Angel turned together with Drusilla. If William was feeling the same way he did, part of him will always hate him for turning him. Not that there was not enough animosity between them anyway. They used to share a woman, and now they shared another one. He did not blame Spike for it. Angel was actually surprised there had not been more men in Buffy's life. He could never really be angry at Spike, nor Drusilla. It was his responsibility to deal with them, in a similar way as Connor was his as well. Which one of the above had hurt him more, he never counted. It was part of the sentence for the sins he committed. Besides, as he had told Connor, nothing in the world was the way it ought to be. – "It's harsh, and cruel. - But that's why there's us. Champions. It doesn't matter where we come from, what we've done or suffered, or even if we make a difference. We live as though the world was what it should be, to show it what it can be." And Spike was now one of them. He nevertheless did feel a certain bitterness towards Buffy. He knew it was not right, but he could not help it. He finally decided he will try not to think of the reasons behind the two of them being together. They were, and it was not his place to question it. He lost that right, first when he became a vampire, and then when he left her. He was going there for what he was going for and nothing else.

He turned his car instinctively into Revello Drive. The car clock showed 5.36 and that meant there still was an hour till daybreak. The house was dark, he expected that. He did not want to use his usual Angel(us) window entry. He had to wake them up if he was going get to a safe place for the day. The new bell sounded like a trumpet in the early hours and the porch lights came on at the touch. He noticed the electronic security system and smiled at it. New Buffy was not only taking steps against vampires.

A little while later, the outside camera angle was turned towards him and another while later Dawn opened the door. She stretched sleepily. "Buffy said you might come. What time is it? She is not back yet."

"Around 6. I could go and see if I can find her?"

"Yeah…probably the school grounds, that will be it," she answered hesitantly. Dawn never knew whether her sister was out on business or just out with Spike. Either way, they were most likely to be found there. Angel was thinking the same, and he was just as uncomfortable staying there with Buffy's "hey, I exist" sister, as he would be seeing THEM together. It had to happen, sooner or later anyway.

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The new school looked like a huge office building. If he did not know its exact location, he would have missed it. He looked at the inscription on it, just to make sure. Below, the map of the area, and the names of the teachers and workers. Buffy Anne Summers, school counsellor, it read. He had another slight smile to himself. Efficient girl. If she was gonna protect Dawn and the rest of the school, she found the best place to do it from. He read on: Left, next to the headmaster's office. It was a reasonable direction to start off looking. Porter sleeping, as they do. Long corridor, doors, turn, numbers, wardrobes, turn, and yellow slime on the floor. Yellow slime on the floor? Growling. He got his sword out of his light, brown leather jacket. Turn.

Several half-eaten demons lay on the ground, another was dismantling the bodies. It could have been more accurately described as a monster. On top of its head were six long horns, almost as long as its face. Just an arm length away. As it felt disturbed in its feeding, it kicked Angel in the side, while he swept it with a low kick to its feet. The monster was quick to stretch its sharp-ended nails and reached towards its opponent. They stabbed in his leg. He cried out in pain, and the monster stood up showing its full height and then slammed its elbow onto his head.

"And now you die!!" it shouted.

Buffy wasn't sure if it knew how to kill vampires, or whether it knew Angel was one, but it seemed like a good time to intercede. She glared across at the monster.

The battle was fast-paced. Buffy's speed and precision were on target, but so was the fiend's. She was surprised and hit hard. A quick hard kick and the fiend fell unconscious. Buffy then lifted him over her head and threw him down the stairs into the basement.

Spike ran down to look for a body. None was there. "you idiot, can't you see we were letting them kill each other?" Spike shoved the kneeling Angel as he stormed past him.

Buffy glanced at her watch. With so close to daybreak, Spike will go down to the crypt, right away, probably. He no longer spent his days in the basement, too much commotion. He still didn't like to be burned, even if he was suicidal. It wasn't a pretty way to die; he wanted to die through the use of a stake instead. It was no use to run after him, especially with Angel hurt and all. Sending Angel after him wasn't an option either; he didn't appear to be in a fit state to help someone else. He was also thinner, than she remembered him. Tomorrow he'll go, when he is healed. She could see Angel struggling to get to his feet, so she approached him. She almost gave him a hand, but hesitated at the last moment. It was so long since they had met and her ex rose up quickly enough anyway, "hi," she said looking into his eyes, "eee…thanks for coming."

Angel tried to make his clothes look a bit more in order, "I think I kinda ruined your fun."

"Yes. Uh, anyway, are you hurt?"

"Hmm, not really. I'm just…tired." He looked it, Buffy noticed. "Things have been a bit busy lately in LA."

The Slayer had been actually quite surprised, how quickly Angel had went down. A rookie vampire could have done better, but she didn't voice her thoughts.

They both peeked at the window, searching the sky. Buffy indicated with a movement of her head that she was ready to go. "Cleaner's will be in soon," she pointed at the mess around them.

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Breakfast was uneasy and awkward. All three of them were at the edge, not really sure what to say. Angel obviously must have needed some food and Buffy reluctantly admitted to having some cattle's blood stored in the fridge. Spike preferred it to pigs' blood.

To ease the tension, Dawn pointed at the cup of blood in Angel's hand, as he didn't take much more than a few mouthfuls, "don't you like it?" Somehow, it was the wrong question to ask as Angel asked for the bathroom's whereabouts as an answer.

Dawn had already left for school when Buffy started wondering about her ex lover. Approaching the bathroom, she heard strange noises coming from it. The action girl kicked in (the door) and she stunningly found Angel kneeling down in front of the toilet being sick. He was sweaty and paler than usual, blending in pretty good with the wallpaper. The blonde only managed a confused "Angel?"

He got himself fairly rapidly together at the sound of her voice. "Yeah, well, your sister's got it right, cattle's blood isn't my favourite," Buffy eyed him unbelieving, "I'll be ok if I can get some rest. You got a bed for me?"

Buffy was too stunned by what she saw to question it as yet, so she just nodded and led him out the bathroom towards the steps for the bedrooms. What had just happened finally sank in and she confronted him before they stepped on the stairs. "Vampires aren't just sick for no reason. What is wrong?"

"Reason. As I said, I'm very tired. If you'd just let me have a rest…"

Annoyance started to take over her voice at the incredible lies this guy was telling her. Ok, they didn't exactly part on good terms, but this shutting out was outrageous. She felt like slapping him in the face. She didn't understand it, neither what he was covering, neither why he was doing it.

That was the way they stood, eying each other in front of the steps, when Giles walked in the front door. He offered his hand to the vampire, "oh, you are here already!"

"Yes, and I should go see Spike. Its cloudy and it was said it stays like that all day. I have blankets in the car." He headed towards the door. Buffy still stood there in dismay, and suddenly decided this was ridiculous and she had to stop Angel leaving, not to mention the daylight factor. That, if she cared at all for another person. Whatever this was about.

"Giles, Angel was sick to his stomach. I don't think it is a good idea to just go," she hoped backing up from her ex watcher.

Giles eyed Angel with more and more curiosity in his eyes. "That is very interesting…" The researcher took over in him. "Can I see? Any chance you could be poisoned?"

"No! For the hundredth time, I'm tired, that is all."

"Why don't you lie down on the couch to rest and I'll check your stomach out." He commanded, instead of asking.

"You'll find, that I'm tired, but if you wish…" They might let him sleep in peace and he could disappear later.

Giles lifted the vampire's dark blue shirt up and used the pads of his first three fingers and a gentle, dipping manoeuvre to carefully inspect the nocturnal hero's epigastric area and left upper quadrant. Buffy crunched her eyebrows at the minuteness of her ex-watcher, trying to figure out what was going on. Giles was also glancing up at Angel's face. He knew that the souled vampire would not easily admit to any pain he might be experiencing. When he noticed Angel pressing his lips harder together, the watcher asked "here? Does it hurt here?" At the same time, he changed to use the palmar surface of his fingers for a deeper palpation. Feeling the muscular resistance, he put his other hand on top of his fingers and gently moved his fingers.

"Giles!" The vampire pushed the watcher's hands away.

Giles sat back with a sigh, obviously satisfied with the reaction he got. "Buffy, get some clothe dipped in warm water. For the stomach cramps," he added, looking in Angel's eyes for effect. The vampire looked away, embarrassed, but didn't disagree.

Buffy got the cloth as quickly as she could. When she arrived back to the room, Giles was touching the blood vessels on Angel's wrist. "WHHAT are you doing?" she opened her eyes wide; Giles did know just as well that vampires didn't have a pulse.

Giles ignored her, still focusing all his attention on Angel. "When? And I mean properly, Angel!"

Angel made a troubled face, as a child caught on doing some mischief. "The last time…Angelus…"

"About four years ago?"

"Hmm, yes."

"Angel…" he started seriously.

The addressee cut in his words. "I know, I know, and don't come with the lectures, Wesley keeps telling me…"

Giles shook his head and took the wet cloth off Buffy, putting it on Angel's stomach. "Is that any good?"

Angel nodded, not able to look in any of the other two's eyes.

"What about hospital supplies?" Giles nudged on.

"Depends."

"On the amount of chemicals that keeps them fresh?"

Another nod. Giles turned to Buffy, who still didn't understand anything. The other two talked about something, without mentioning that something. "Buffy. Hmm. I don't usually ask you to do things like this, you know, but…you know the surgery on Keynes Road? They just had their "Give Blood" action day yesterday. You could pinch or even buy a few fresh containers, and get some plasma from the prepared items. Ye, and pop to the pharmacy for some iron tablets."

Buffy stared in dismay, slowly digesting the information, looking from one to the other.

Angel shook his head. "Giles, it's not necessary, I really don't…"

Giles stopped him, almost shouting, "you don't! You really don't! You think I don't know? I felt your stomach, and from its size, for your sake, I am happy Angelus had a bit of fun, cause otherwise you would be so ill, you wouldn't be able to stand. Your veins are hardly noticeable."

Angel gave him a smirk. "Hah! What do you want me to do? Have a mouthful of every tenth person that is coming round my way?"

Giles calmed down. "No. But the hospital supplies are there for the sick. And you ARE. We had cases described by the council. What did Wesley tell you? "

"That animal blood is not substantial nourishment for me on an indefinite basis. But you don't know all the details. I was…without ANY food for a few month recently and…and I sometimes have these episodes."

"Whom are you talking to again? I read enough to know that this is the beginning of your so-called episode and that it gets worse. Now, before Buffy goes, what else do you need?"

"I…I have some painkillers in my coat pocket."

"We'll get it," said Buffy and gestured to Giles to follow her in the lobby. "Now, once again Giles, would you tell me exactly what is going on? How ill is he? And what does this mean? Will Spike need to get some human blood once in a while?"

"I don't know, Buffy. Probably that would not be a highly eminent urgency for a hundred years or so. As for Angel, I'll phone Cordelia and see what she says. It's probably easier than extracting everything word by word from him. Can you get what I asked for?"

"Yes, but… would it not be easier if I just gave him my…ok, ok, I didn't say a thing."

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Cordelia was in Sunnydale by noon. Buffy intended to hug her briefly, but Cordy responded positively and the hug turned into a long and tight embrace. Then they smiled at each other for a while in SILENCE.

"I'm so happy to see you," admitted Buffy thinking of her younger days, "you…look…great. Really great," she said, knowing the other woman will appreciate the comment.

"You too. I see you take care of yourself," gestured Cord towards the more stylishly, maturely sexy clothes the vampire slayer was wearing. Cordy took a closer look. "Elle Designer?" She laughed, "mines too. Because the cardigan is large enough to hide a stake," she smiled at Buffy.

The two same age, short blondes connected on an emotional level previously unknown to them. If they didn't have much in common in the past, they certainly had now, "being in the same business and all…" finished her thoughts loudly the half demon-half human visionary. Besides, there was that other thing they had in common, thought Cordelia, "how is he?"

"We were hoping you could tell us…I think he is sleeping at the moment. He couldn't keep down anything we've given him so far."

"Oh, no," freaked out Cordelia. "He's never been so bad before…and it's so hard to obtain human blood in honest ways…"

"I know," frowned Buffy, "how I got it today wasn't exactly legal. I was adamant, but if Giles told me, it had to be the only option. That is how I figure that…Angel is pretty bad."

"He's been like this on and off since Wesley got him back from the bottom of ocean. We thought he would get better with time."

"He will," ascended the stairs Giles, "I reckon, a few glasses of the proper stuff a week will keep things at bay. Cordelia." Giles embraced her too, "if it's allowed for an ordinary human being to hold a godlike creature in his arms…"

"Hahhaha, I wish. Mind you, gods, I would like to have a word with them myself. About the suffering they cause. In general and in particular."

"Yees," agreed Giles thoughtfully, "anyway, I'll be back in the evening to check on him, sorry Cordelia, I have business to attend to."

"Wanna see him?" gestured Buffy towards the bedrooms leading Cordelia up.

Angel lay on the bed, shirt unbuttoned, with his eyes shut, quietly moaning, with his hands clenched to his stomach. Cordelia approached him.

"If you stay with him…I gotta go to work," apologised the school counsellor, "I'll be back not long after Dawn comes home."

"Of course," agreed Cordy and sat down on the bed. She gently removed Angel's hands out the way and started to massage the exact area Giles has found tender that morning.

"Cordelia," whispered Angel without opening his eyes.

"Yes, my love," answered Cordelia, massaging in a circular way, moving her hands clockwise beginning below the ribs and coming down till the navel. She did it softly, but definitely, as if she had practiced it before. Buffy was at the door, just about shutting it, when suddenly she decided she's gonna stay and shut the door from this side. This way, she could remain unnoticed. She wasn't just curious, she would've not stepped into other people's privacy, but what she just heard and saw raised a certain amount of jealousy in her. She had no right, she couldn't understand that by herself, but she had to stay. Cordelia. How? Could she be caring enough for someone other than herself? Of course she could, she would've not been chosen as a higher being if it wasn't so.

After a few minutes of massaging, Angel opened his eyes. He attempted a slight smile at Cordy, "hey. You came."

"Of course I came, Angel. What did you think I was gonna do when I heard you weren't well?"

Angel shrugged, "Connor?"

"Connor's a sweet baby. I mean…I know him what? A few month? On and off? I was feeling lost and he happened to be the one that found me, sorta. He knows about us. And we never intended it to be anything that would hinder us being together." No answer. "Can't you just forget about Connor for a few minutes? Connor's been the main topic of conversation we had since…since the time he was born really."

"I didn't make it so. Especially not lately."

"If you wanna be angry with us, do so. You might have a point there. I don't see why we should spoil the future because of it. Not to mention this silly idea of yours, that you will crave human blood if you taste it. We all trust you on this, even Connor. Why don't you trust yourself?"

"You swayed away from the topic."

"What else could've been said?…so?"

"What?"

"The new topic. Blood. You can't run away this time. You gonna talk to me. Why didn't you drink the blood Connor stole for you from the hospital? It was AB positive, the best. I get the idea, you don't wanna encourage your son to steal, but it was there and…"

"I hate it, ok? I hate the smell of it, I hate the taste of it, and I hate the look of it. Don't you think I got fed up with it in almost 250 years? Not to mention the hundred I spent in a hell dimension."

Cordelia looked at him disapprovingly, "never heard of a vampire having too much blood. Too little, yes. And you know what? I had enough of the topic myself. We've been through this before. You promised you'll take care of yourself. Is this the way you do it?"

"Like you care. After all you've seen about me. After all I've done. After all you've done."

"Angel! I cannot say any more than I already did. I love you."

"I promised I'll try…you…you forgot the hot compresses."

Buffy panicked. If Cordelia was gonna go for some water, she's gonna see her standing there. On the other hand, Buffy found the last comment quite funny. It meant Angel must've been in pain, but it sounded like an upset little boy loosing an argument. An argument between couples. That was fairly clear from the way they treated each other. And that, to her own shock, didn't bother her that much. That was what she was aiming to find out for herself and she did. She could go now, if she found a way to leave without the two of them noticing.

"Is that an attempt to derail from the subject matter?" She heard Cordelia. Angel pressed his lips together, to which Cordelia calmed. "All right, lover. You slipped out of my view, my fault, but I'm back," she turned to go to the bathroom and saw Buffy. Made no comments, just carried on, so Buffy took the opportunity and went out. At least Angel didn't know she was there.

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"We have to talk," Cordelia waited for her in the living room when she came back from work.

"Yes," agreed Buffy sitting down in front of her. There was no point in messing about, they both needed to know where they stood. Angel needed someone to take care of him, and that not just now. So Buffy also needed to know that there will really be someone to do that for him. If not, she cared enough to feel the need to help him. "How is he feeling?"

"Not good. But what…this is not…so…how do you feel about all you have seen?" Cordelia was on edge. Her happiness might have depended on this answer. She wanted Angel, but if Buffy still wanted him she could never fully have him.

"Ee…what exactly do you want me to say? That it's ok? It is ok. I don't know myself how honest am I with myself, but I think I'm ok with it. We…have different lives and I did want him to come back to me for a long while…but now it would just further complicate things."

"With Spike?"

"Mostly with Spike. You know, he did all this soul thing for me. And part of his sufferings are because of me. I asked Angel to come to deal with the rest."

"Yes. This is something else I wanted to talk to you about. He's not in any condition to do so. He's confused himself."

"I can see that."

"So…I thought…I'll just take him home. We'll stay in touch. Regularly. Not like…when he gets better we can come back, or Spike can come to us."

Buffy had to concur. Letting the two vampires together under the circumstances would probably cause more harm then good. Spike could not see that Angel still cannot deal with his own soul after a hundred years. "Will HE agree?" asked Buffy, knowing that Angel would only really take advice from himself.

Cordelia smiled confidently, " just let me handle it," heading for the stairs.

"Cordelia?" One question was buggering her mind, because it didn't work out with Angel and herself, "do you…do you sleep together?"

"Yes. How? I actually need you for my happiness. Yes, you. As long as he still loves you, we can have sex any time. It won't be perfect. As easy as that. Funny, eh?"

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Cordelia was driving as they left that night. Angel was too embarrassed to talk to Buffy, but she embraced him as they went. "Take care of him, all right?" she addressed Cordy. It was the final let go.

The End