Nornal text = the present (See chapter one)
Bold = written articles: letters, newspaper clippings, etc.
Italic = the stuff that happened leading up to the stuff in normal text. (flash back)
Bold/italic = Setsunas past (flash back)
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"Coughing up feeling just for you, to find something real to hold on to...You say that all the good is gone, that I have forgotten who I am. Free as a bird, wild as the wind, but somehow I can not let you in." Nobody Loves You--(C) 2002 Garbage
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The dojos' doctor stood there as calmly as he could, looking at the horrified expression passing over Setsunas' face. He put his hand up his kimono sleeve taking out a dagger and set it on the table nearest the door. He glanced back at her one more time, then left the room without saying anything. Setsuna cried into her hands, soaking her skin with salty tears of pain. She did nothing to prevent this, she could have done more.
The doctor returned holding washi paper with a kimono in it, and a long piece of hemp rope. He picked the dagger up from the table, placed the washi wrapper down and stacked everything neatly. He looked at Setsuna solemnly and walked out the door closing it softly.
It was time for her to perform a ritual taught to every daughter; if you are raped, you must kill yourself. Bind your ankles together, dress in a formal robe if possible, and slit your wrists. She grasped her now flat belly, not being able to move from the thought of losing everyone at once. It was impossible that they were gone. Her unborn child dead, without a name even to call out, or write onto a paper lantern to sail down the river to guide his soul. Nothing is all she had now, and nothing is what she was going to leave this world with. She needed to see him again, she already ached to feel his arms around her shoulders. Comforting her on this great loss.
She finally got off the bed, dressed in a white robe. She untied the washi paper and saw the one thing she hadn't seen in three months, her Uchikake. The heavy garment fell out of the wrapper onto the floor in a big heap. The only thing that would be suitable for her to pass to the next world in. She picked the robe up and put it on, admiring the embroidered cranes and plum blossoms that cover the garment. Bright blues, reds, and metallic threads made the piece a work of art. She ran her fingers across the flowers and cranes, thinking of how long it took her to put on everything for her wedding day. It took half the day just to get her hair, make-up and wardrobe perfect.
She ran the belt through the loops near the bottom of the Uchikake to keep it shut, and opened the draw of the table it had been sitting on. She found her Mothers old hair pins and combs that she had worn on her Wedding day also, and started to do her hair up. She arranged it in a neat bun and placed the ornaments tastily in her dark black hair. Nothing seemed right. She applied some lipstick then looked into the hand mirror. Something was off. She took the rope and bound her ankles together. She kneeled on the floor and unsheathed the dagger. She looked at her reflection in the blade, seeing her almond eyes gazing back. She re-sheathed the dagger, untied her ankles, took the hair pins out, wiped off the lipstick, undid the robe, laid it out on the bed, dressed in what was in the room, then left through the window, taking only the dagger with her.
She ran from the dojo, dressed in mens clothes, her hair still tied in a bun on top of her head. Setsuna would not allow herself to die, not now. Nothing was taken care of yet, she wanted to take her revenge and instill honor on her husband. He died trying to save her and their child, he would not die in vain. She would not be saved by the Gods, only to kill herself in a locked room dressed in her wedding attire. She ran her hands over her hair, feeling a comb that she forgot to remove. She pulled it from her hair, seeing that it was the very comb her husband gave to her. She smiled, put it back into her hair, and continued walking down the dusty road to wherever it may lead her.
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Setsuna woke up in a panic endused sweat. She sat up and looked around the room, not finding any comfort with her foreign surroundings as she didn't recognize the room she was in. The threw the blankets off herself and got out of the futon that lay on the floor. She picked up the shinai that lay on the floor near the sliding door to the room. She heard faint voices coming from the hallway. She looked down at her clothes noticing that she wore the same attire as when she ran from the dojo those few years ago. Perhaps, it wasn't a dream she woke from, maybe that is what happened before she woke up in this strange room. She readied herself and opened the door enough to see into the hallway. She looked into it as best she could without being noticed, then slid the door halfway open and poked her head out of it, seeing no one there. She walked into the hallway, her tabi clad feet moving silently across the wooden floor. She heard a noise from behind her and turned around, walking backwards in the direction she was going.
"Setsuna-dono, are you feeling better," a voice behind her said. She turned quickly bringing the shinai up and getting into a stance. Suddenly a rush of memory came back to her like a broken dam pouring out water. Kenshin stood before her with a confused look spread across his face.
"Himura-san, I'm sorry, you startled me," she said lowering the shinai.
"How is your head this morning, not hurting or anything is it? You dont' feel faint, or perhaps you're hungry..."
"No I'm fine actually, Himura-san. I think I just need to rest like I was supose to be doing in the first place." She turned from him and walked back into the room she was staying in and slid the door shut behind her.
Kenshin stood there looking at the closed door, thinking of himself as stupid for not feeling any sword spirit from the girl that stood before him moments ago. It was suppressed or covered so well, not even he could feel it from her. Perhaps she didn't even possess one at all. Although, from what Sano had told him, he doubted she didn't have one. This girl was becoming such an enigma to him and he needed to find out everything to be able to save her from the gang after her, but mostly, to save her from herself.
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Soujiro walked put the many steps of the Buddhist Temple that stood before him, carrying a light load bundled on his back like a peddler. He got to the top and adjusted the pack, looked all the way to the top shielding his eyes from the noon day sun, then proceeded to walk to the entrance to the monistary. It had been at least ten years since he last stepped foot into the building itself. He approched the door, but heard someone approching him from the left and turned to the man calling out his name.
"Sojirou-san! Okarinasai! It's been some time hasn't it," the monk asked Soujiro holding a basket with a variety of plant material in it.
"Yes, it has, hasn't it? I'm hear to see the High Priest."
"Eh? You're here to see San Zang-sama? I'm sure he'll be quite upset with seeing you again. Especialy since you left so many years ago on bad terms with him. I'll see what I can do to have you in to see him. In the mean time, I'll set you up with a room for you to stay in." The monk pushed open the huge wodden doors with the use of his shoulder then waved Soujiro in before him, then closed the doors, pushing them shut, the acoustics reverberating the sound throughout the monastery, announcing their return. No one greeted them, rahter the monk took Soujiro up the winding staircase and showed him a simple room. It held only a bed, a night stand and a window on the far side overlooking the way Soujiro had walked up the mountain side to get there.Removing his waraji sandles before entering the room,he walked over to the bed and put his pack down on the floor near. He sat down and massaged his sore feet as the monk left the room, closing the door behind him. He flopped on to the bed, spreading himself out enjoying how soft it was. Then again, anything was soft compared to sleeping on the hard ground for days. He drifted in and out of a light sleep for about thirty minutes until a soft knock on the door got his complete attention. The door cracked open and the monk from before stuck his head in, "He will see you now."
Soujiro got off the bed, picked up his sandals and left the room. He put them back on and followed the monk down the hallway up another set of stairs to the next floor. He guided him to a set of heavy wooden doors heavily decorated with writtings and pictures that were on the sutras that San Zang had brought with him to Japan. Two large door knockers were on either door and the monk picked one off the door and knocked loudly annoucing that he had retireved Soujiro from his room.
A loud voice answered allowing them to enter. The monk opened only on of the doors, and told Soujiro that only he could enter to see him. Soujiro walked him, a smile on his face, his head held high.
The High Priest sat at a large desk writting something with a calligraphy brush, looked up to Soujiro,then placed it on it's rest to finish his writting at a later time. "I may know why you've come back to see me, but, please enlighten me to why you have." The monks eyes burned with wisdom, with a slight tinge of hate that was blinked away as fast as it had settled there.
Soujiro smiled back, "I've come to finally learn the last technique, I know I'm ready to have obtain the ability to use it.."
The monk sat back in his chari, stroking his long white beard, thinking. He stood up and picked up a piece of paper and folded it into a paper airplane, then pushed it threw the air, watching it glide until it crashed to the floor. "Perhaps you are more ready then I was when I learned that. I will grant your request, but, you must stay here and learn it properly..."
"I have no time to San Zang-sama, this is a matter of life and death if I stay here for any length of time." He calmly smiled at the monk as the High Priest thought about it again.
"Very well then. If someone's life is at stake here, then I can't wish you away knowing that someone has died because of my foolishness. Take what you need, the sacred room will be open for you, but for only one hour. If you haven't gathered what you need in that time, then it will rest on your shoulders. Go then." He turned his back to Soujiro and looked out the window, ignoring the boy as he walked out of the room.
The monk stood outside the door egerly awaiting to know what the High Priest had said to Soujiro, only to be thoroughly surprised. The monk looked at Soujiro surprised, knowing that if he had stayed and became a monk, he may have been the next in line to San Zang.
The monk led Soujiro down the hallway to a extremly plain door, which looked like any other in the monastery. He removed a key from around his neck, unlocked the door and led Soujiro inside.
"The left wall is sacred herbs. Thier uses are printed on the labels. On the back wall are the sacred weapons for rituals. On the right wall are the sacred scrolls with the ancient magick rites written on them. I will be back in one hour to lock the room." He left closing the door behind him, standing outside to make sure no one else entered without written permission to do so.
Soujiro began sorting through the scrolls, taking half of his hour to finally find the one he was looking for. He then quickly grabbed the herbs he would need and the blood worms. The monk returned, telling Soujiro that his time had expired. Soujiro quickly left the room, returned to his room, grabbed his things and left trying not to wast anymore time in that place. He had finally gotten what he needed. He was on his way to Tokyo again.
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A beta reader is needed for future and possible back chapters. If you would like to volenteer, please e-mail me at: SanzosPaperFanOD@aol.com with the subject: Beta Reader-Akuji.
Thanks!
Phoenix