August 12, 2004

The Station House

7:00 P.M.

Munch wasn't talking.

If that wasn't weird enough, he was actually filing a report.

Without complaining.

Needless to say, the other detectives were very worried.

"I'm getting coffee," Elliot announced. "Want some, John?"

"No."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"All right then. What about you guys?" Olivia and Fin both nodded, and Elliot went to get the cups, with a worried glance back at Munch.

Cragen walked out of his office and stared at the detectives working diligently at their desks without the usual banter. It was strange them all being so quiet. He then realized Munch wasn't talking. It about gave him a heart attack.

"What's wrong, John?" Cragen asked. When Munch didn't answer, Fin explained.

"Had a little run-in with Nellie Rivers."

"Shut up," Munch snapped.

"Just tryin' to help, man."

"Well, don't."

"John, stop it," Cragen ordered. "This isn't Fin's fault... whatever 'this' is, exactly."

Elliot chose this time to come back with three cups of coffee and sensed the tension.

"Something happen?" he asked Olivia. She shook her head, warning him not to ask. He nodded, distriputed the coffee, and started to sit down when his cell phone rang. He sighed, stood up, and answered.

"Stabler... okay, calm down, tell me what happened... All right, we'll be over in a few minutes. Just calm down and get yourself and Laila out of the apartment... Go to your neighbors', can you do that?... All right, we'll be right there... Okay, he'll come, I promise... Okay... Good-bye."

All the detectives and Cragen were staring at him as he hung up. Their eyes showed fear that they were trying to mask. Elliot gave them all a meaningful look.

"It's Nellie," Munch guessed, his voice and face showing no emotion. "Something happened to her."

"No, she's fine," Elliot said. Munch allowed himself to breath in with relief, but Elliot wasn't finished. "It's her brother."

Outside the Rivers' Apartment Building

7:30 P.M.

The lights on the squad cars were flashing. A body was being pulled out to an ambulance on a stretcher, but the blanket was already pulled up over his face. Munch surveyed the scene, his face deviod of expression. Olivia put her hand on his shoulder. He brushed it away.

Suddenly, he heard someone shouting his name, and he turned to the steps, where Nellie was running from the grasp of the medical examiners towards him. She wrapped her arms around him, sobbing uncontrollably. After a while, he noticed she was saying something, but it was a little muffled against his jacket.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything I said. I shouldn't have.. I'm sorry..."

"It's okay, Nellie," Munch comforted. "I'm not angry, it's okay.

"I'm so sorry... It's all my fault.. It's all my fault..."

"No," he said, firmly. "Everything's going to be okay. It's gonna be okay..."

The Station House

8:00 P.M.

"Nellie, you have to tell us what happened," Elliot told the girl. She had a blanket wrapped around her and she was shivering. It was warm in the interrogation room, but she had told the detectives she was cold.

"It's all my fault... All my fault..." That was all they could get out of her.

Outside the room, looking through the two way mirror, Matthew Rivers paced.

"She's in pain," he said. "Can't you let me take her home?"

"For one thing," Munch said, "you're home is a crime scene. For another, she's not hurt. We need to get this information as soon as possible."

Matthew eyed him. "Are you Detective Munch?"

Munch nodded.

"She talks about you all the time," he informed John. "She seems to think you're her friend. Huh, guess she was wrong."

"What's that mean?"

"You don't care about her at all! You're just going to let them put her through this?"

"Sir, he's only doing his job," Cragen explained. "We need to find the person who did this to your son."

Matthew looked at the ground and shook his head.

In the room, Elliot and Olivia were getting no where.

"Would you feel more comfortable talking to someone else, Nellie? Like John?" Olivia asked.

"No! I don't want to talk to John!" She screeched. Elliot gave Olivia a wondering look.

"Why not?" he asked. "Weren't you friends?"

"Yes, but he hates me. I know he does. After I told him to go to hell and everything.. And now my brothers dead all because of me, and I'm sure he hates me. I'm sure..."

"He doesn't hate you," Olivia consoled. "And this wasn't your fault. Could you just tell us what happened, Nellie? You must know something."

Nellie sniffed. "I took Laila out for something to eat. There wasn't anything in the house and she was hungry. James wasn't. He stayed home. He's only six. I shouldn't have let him stay home all alone... I should have made him come..."

"Nellie, this isn't your fault," Olvia said again.

"NO! IT IS! When I came home, he was standing over James's body, holding a bloody knife from our own kitchen. Then he saw me and grinned... It was horrible... I just wanted to kill him... but he ran away. He ran down the fire escape, before I could do anything. Before I could protect James... It's my fault... It's all my fault..."

"Did you recognize the man you saw over your brother's body?" Elliot asked.

"Y-yes... but I can't tell you. He'll come after Laila. He'll kill her, too. I can't lose her. I can't..."

"He won't get your sister, Nellie," Olivia promised. This just made Nellie even more distraught.

"That's what you said when I reported the rape! And look what happened! This is all my fault! I told and now he killed James to get back at me!" Her head collapsed into her hands and she cried. Olivia put a hand on her shoulder.

"Nellie, are you saying your stepfather did this?" she asked.

"I can't tell you! It's my fault... everything's my fault..."

"No, this isn't your fault, Nellie," Elliot said, but he said it forcefully. "It's not, okay? This is Jeff Grey's fault. And he's going to jail for life. This is not your fault."

"WOULD YOU STOP SAYING THAT!?" Nellie screeched. "It IS my fault. I killed him! He would still be alive if I hadn't come here at all! So don't tell me I didn't do it! Because I did!"

"Were you holding the knife?" Elliot asked. "Were you standing over his body? Were you the one who raped a thirteen year old girl? No, you weren't. So this is NOT your fault, okay?"

Nellie stared at him for a while, and he could tell she was on the brink of tears. "Detective, I can't do this. I can't live without my little brother. He and Laila were everything to me. I wouldn't be able to live if anything happened to Laila. Everything I've ever had in my life has been taken away from me. All I have is Laila. And it can't be coincidence. I had to have done something wrong. Some how this is some way to get back at me for something I did. I deserve this, I must, or it wouldn't happen. But James didn't. James was a little boy, the sweetest person you'd ever meet, and now he's dead, and the only reason I didn't kill myself in that apartment was because I still have Laila to think about and I could never do that to her. So, please, don't ask me to give the last thing that means anything to me away by telling you that Jeff did it. You can find out for yourselves. But I'm not going to be the one to tell you... I won't be reponsible for another person's death."