Daddy killed Mummy and laughed.

I remember it very well. As well as I remember all my dolls' favorite sandwiches, I remember. And that's very well indeed. You see, they are all very particular about what they wish to eat and I must keep in mind their preferences.

When we were all sitting around the wooden table that gave me such splinters and Mummy had just passed me the marmalade... Orange marmalade is Miss Edith's favorite sandwich, just like me. Miss Edith is very much like me. She talks like me and looks like me and looks to me like a proper child should to her mummy, such a good girl she is.

She looks to her daddy like a proper girl should too. We both love Daddy, and he loves us back and takes care of us and all our friends and we're such a happy family. Such a happy family like we used to be, with Mummy and the sisters. We would always sit together and have breakfast and we'd love each other to the death.

Daddy loved me to the death too. That's what he told me when he bit me and I still believe him, he's such a good daddy to all his children. Grandmummy just doesn't appreciate him like I do; she's a spiteful one. But I love her anyway, like I've loved everyone and everything, from the poor puppies and the stars to my Spike and my dolls and my tall ostriches.

There was a knock at the door, a impressive knock like my ostriches make, and Sister opened it and invited him in, for he was an impressive gentleman for business with the head of the house.

He walked into the kitchen, oh he was so handsome and I was so scared, I was so scared of my Daddy, but I didn't know he was to be my Daddy then. And he saw us all sitting and eating toast and marmalade and he smiled at me.

I dropped my toast and my teacup to the floor and pointed at him and told Mummy he was a very bad man who was following me, and to send him away.

Mummy was wearing a white dress with lace at the wrists and the blood stood out like lovely red roses, when Daddy ripped her arm off and snapped her neck. He stood there holding her arm, while I held the sisters, just like I hold Miss Edith when she's scared of the dark.

Sisters were screaming and Daddy was grinning like a hungry cat at me.

He went after younger sister first and smacked her with Mummy's arm so it hurt. Then he poked out her jelly eyes while she screamed and screamed and it hurts my ears to think about how loud she was.

And finally she got quiet, it was a relief. Then he turned to older sister and played with her fingers for a while, then he got bored with them and tossed them on the floor and started to play with her legs. The floor was covered with body parts.

And once Daddy was all done with making a mess with his toys, he stood over Mummy and laughed with that Irish voice of his. I still remember how he laughed, and I love it so, it is the true angel in him.

I was cowering in the corner. I was scared of my Daddy, he had blood all over his cravat and his hair was messy and my Mummy was lying dead on the floor. And he reached for me and he threw my nightie up and he did horrible things to me, amidst all the fingers and toes, they hurt so much... I love the pain now.

Darling, he told me, I'll be seeing you around, shan't I? He left me there with my skirts hiked up to my thighs and blood on my lips, marked as his bride of darkness. And I hated him so much, so harsh, and I was so torn. He left me there lying with the dirty feet, and it smelled bad, and I had to run.

And when I ran to the convent, away from him, he still followed me. I was going to be a bride of God, and he ruined that all, he killed me and I had blood roses all over my lovely white dress just like Mummy had.

But now that's all past.

He likes me to call him 'Daddy' in between the satin sheets. I don't let my dolls watch; it's not for their delicate eyes. But I think they peek.

I love Daddy so much. But sometimes when I eat marmalade and toast I think about Mummy and then I think about that day, and then I don't love Daddy so much. Then I hate him, and I want to char his skin with the blessed water, and burn crosses into that handsome chest and I want to kill him and hurt him...

But it eventually passes and I know that he's always been looking out for me, and he loves me too.

But Daddy did kill Mummy and he did laugh about it. And I did love Mummy and he did kill my love.

I guess Mummy needed to go so I could love him best.