A/N: Did you like that one? I hope you did. -Worry-wort- Well, here's my next songfic.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything that isn't mine! Grumbles Geez, every time these voices ask me in my head, I give them the same answer and they won't shut up. Mumbles cursing Well, the song "Bring Me To Life" is NOT mine, it belongs to Evanescence.
I hope you enjoy this Z/A story! (From Zel's point of view if you can't tell from the story itself)
Bring Me To Life
I don't know what I'm doing here. I don't know how I could possibly face you again, after how I left things between us before, but my feet have a mind of their own. I'm back at Seyruun, and my feet are leading me to you.
"Who goes there?!" A guard asks me. I answer that I have business with you, Amelia. He has the nerve to tell me that the Queen is too busy to deal with commoners, but I suppose I should cheer to the fact that I look like a commoner. I ask him to let me in, as I am good friends with Phil and Amelia. I would use your title, but I do not know what you are anymore. The guard doesn't seem to believe me, I should remember to tell you that you've chosen well for your guards. As a last resort, I hold up the bracelet you gave me so long ago. Like magic, he quickly bows and gets out of the way, allowing me entrance. I thank him in passing.
I walk down the familiar halls, and I feel a touch of loneliness in such a big place. This is ironic, actually, considering I've been alone for so long already. I turn the corner, and I bump into somebody who was running away from something. No, it wasn't just anybody, it was you.
You've grown so beautiful, it takes my breath away. In a white silk gown that clings to your obvious curves, the size of your chest is made blatantly obvious but it matches all the better with your figure. You've let your hair grow down to your waist. It befits you, like a veil hiding an angel.
I hold you in my arms, as you've fallen on top of me. You quickly utter an apology, and move to get up, before you make eye contact with me. Then you keep staring into my eyes, and I get the shivers, good shivers, but shivers nonetheless.
How can you see into my eyes like open doors
Leading you down into my core
Where I've become so numb without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home
I'm startled out of my reverie when you apologize again and get up. You look at me again, and ask if she's seen me before. I decided to let you figure that out on your own, so I answer no. I am a traveler from Atlass, only wishing to befriend the Queen. I say I have heard much about you, but wish to learn more. I get the pleasure of seeing your light blush, and I feel a deep yearning churn within me. I know what I've been missing, what I need now.
All these years that I've traveled in search of my cure, I've had a purpose, a reason to go on. I remember bitterly how I shunned you before, when you asked that I stay with you. You realized that I can't stay any one place until I've found my cure, so you made me take one of your bracelets, and promise to come back and return it. Well, I found my cure, but I think it did more harm than good. I realize that I have nothing left to go on, nothing to strive for. I can't return home – I wouldn't be welcome there. I can't just return to you, out of the blue, since I've disregarded you for so long. But, I think…you're my only hope.
(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up)
Before I come undone
(Save me)
Save me from the nothing I've become
I'm as good as dead inside now. I feel worse than I did cursed. Is that possible? I suppose it is, since I'm feeling it now. I think I realize too, that now I'm more susceptible to death. Isn't that what it means, when I can feel my heart beating blood for me? It's hard to remember, I've been a demon for so long, and as you know, demons can't be truly classified as living. Not like your kind of living anyway.
You ask my name, and I tell you my old name, the name I had discarded when I realized what it meant. I am Zebulon, meaning "Praiseworthy," to you now. I knew I could not live up to the name, so I did not try, and strove for another name, with a meaning I could not comprehend. Zelgadis had been what I'd chosen, but it only made me more different.
You accept this as my name, and ask that I meet her in the west wing balcony in an hour or so. You make sure I know where it is, before bidding me goodbye and running off. Not much later, a small group of councilors stop me, and ask if I've seen the Queen. I tell them no, but I was wondering where she was. Once they leave, I continue on my way towards the west wing, thinking on what I'll tell you when it comes to it. There's at least one thing I know by heart now though, I can't live without you anymore.
Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life
As I wait for you, I come to terms with myself. You are too pure to be with me. You need someone who believes in justice as much as you do. You need a good, trustworthy ruler on your side, not someone who ran out on his own family because he thought he was too weak to rule. This is the same thing, and I can't handle it. I try to convince myself that you might actually like who I've become, but it's hard. You are the only true judge.
Speak of the angel and ye shall come. You seem a bit out of breath, but I won't ask why. You stand next to me, looking over your kingdom, and ask why I really came. People don't usually come all the way to Seyruun just to befriend her. I don't say anything, because I don't know what to say. I can't say that I'm in love with you, that I want to always be with you, because I'm sure you would just kindly reject me. Your position doesn't allow for me to willingly tell the truth. At least not yet. So, I say my answer slowly.
"I think… I think there's something in me, something that needs to be healed…or extracted."
You were kind when you asked what it was. You're such a dear, I want to be with you always.
"I… I want you to … take away my loneliness."
Somehow, I doubt that you were expecting that kind of answer, but you were trained well to be a queen, a peacemaker. Just as kindly, you asked what had caused this loneliness to come in the first place. I gulp, I can't keep it in any longer. I have to tell her, "You. Living my life away from you."
I know this would have left you speechless, if you had trusted me then enough to show it. I need your help, Amelia. Let your light shine down on me, and bless me with your kindness.
Bring me to life
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)
Bring me to life
Frozen inside without your touch without your love darling only you are the life among the dead
You continue to smile kindly. Your hand reaches over, and grasps mine. Something tells me, that you've figured me out. Who knows, it just might be your next sentence. "Welcome back, Zelgadis. I'm glad you've come back."
Playing dumb, I asked what gave me away. Your laugh sends ripples of pleasure through me, and I feel myself already healing. You answer that she'd known since I had come through the doorway. She had run from the council room to greet him, and couldn't believe her eyes at first, to see him so drastically changed.
You put your head on my shoulder, and I freeze up instinctively. Your gentle tone calms me though, and my muscles relax. You say that you've been waiting for me. You've turned down every suitor, and every would-be King of Seyruun, in anticipation of my return. I'm touched, and I don't try to hide it. I grip your hand tighter, that's all I dare to do.
All this time I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
Got to open my eyes to everything
Without a thought without a voice without a soul
Don't let me die here
There must be something more
Bring me to life
I suddenly come to the notion that you might feel the same way I do. So I take a chance, going slow at first. I tell you that I missed you a lot, and the thought of seeing you again cured was the only thing that kept me going – and that's the truth. I hesitate, but eventually say, "And when I saw you today, I came to realize something else. I've been living a lie, saying that the cure is all I can think about, because there's always been something else."
(Bring me to life)
I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside
(Bring me to life)
You look at me with wonder, and I hesitate again, but it has to be said. "I saw you that fateful day, when I was first turned into a chimera. It started then, and I didn't want to say I knew you, when Lina introduced us. But, ever since, I've…been in love with you."
You smile at me and snuggle closer. Not even above a whisper, you say, "It may not have been love at first sight, but I know I've loved you for a long time, too."
I look down at you, and the look we share, is all we need.
A/N: Sigh A bit OOC huh? Oh well, that's what makes it nice and fwuffy! Purr Kinda strange though, isn't it? First I have Lina and Zel, then it's Lina and Gourry, then it's Zel and Amelia. It's a good thing these fics aren't connected, or else Lina and Zel would be two-timers. Well, what do you think of it? I'll rest awhile so that you can get your reviews in. I'm not trying to bribe you, but I'm not sure I'll want to continue if you don't review.