Midsummer's Night Joy

(part two)

(Hermia and Lysander)

Lysander – How now my bitch? How are you so pale?

Hermia – How can I not to be? If my father wants me to marry Demetrius. Lysander – Worry not, hottest ass. For we shall work it out.

Hermia – Oh, my biggest of all. You have a plan?

Lysander – Yes, I have! We shall go to my aunt's house, she's a prostitute and we can have every night to ourselves.

Hermia – What are you telling me? Is that the secret to our happiness?

Lysander – Yes it is, Hermia, my wet dream. Do you want to go?

Hermia – HELL I WANT! When shall we go?

Lysander – Tomorrow! At night so no one can see us, at that pub, remember? Where we met.

Hermia – I'll be there Lysander, oh captain of that vagina of mine.

Lysander – But look! It's Helena!

Enters Helena

Hermia – God speed, fair Helena!

Helena – You call me fair? You stole my man you bitch!

With your bright white smile, your sexy body and your plastic breasts...

Hermia – (yells) Well ad least I didn't have a vagina implant!

Helena – (cries) How could you? I told you a secret!

Hermia – You insulted my breasts!

Helena – You stole my man!

Hermia – I try to keep him away from me!

Helena – He drools at your smile!

Hermia – I told him not to look!

Helena – He follows you everywhere!

Hermia – I told him to go away!

Helena – He desires you!

Hermia – He desires my father!

Helena – You lie!

Lysander – Are you over yet?

Hermia and Helena – (stare at Lysander)

Lysander – It's decided, not-so-fair Helena, Hermia and I will run tonight.

Hermia – Yes, we will, to a place no one can find us!

Helena – Were will that be?

Lysander – My aunt's house! She's rich and she's not at home when the sun goes down until his up again.

Hermia – Remember that pub? Where we used to be? Looking at the cuties and the cuties looking at me? So that where our will be.

So poor Helena, get your man. I'll take mine out of here.

(to Lysander) And you, my muscle-man, forget not our date.

Lysander – You bet I won't. I'll be there as soon has it's time.

Exits Hermia

Lysander – Be happy with Demetrius and keep him away of my Sex Goddess.

Adieu, Helena, adieu!

Exits Lysander

Helena(alone) – Oh misery of mine, I'll remain virgin until the end of time.

Why do I care in being so hot, if Demetrius thinks I'm not.

Oh, Love, that only sex you destroy, why me you must annoy?

I'm so alone, without anyone. How couldn't I see this come?

Exits Helena

AN- here's 2, part 3 will be coming soon (I hope )