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Chapter 3
Merry, Pippin, and Sam had barely escaped the wrath of Elrond. The next day, Elrond's hair was Elf-perfect, although they still got nasty looks from. Despite the nasty looks, the Hobbits were far from being done with tormenting Elrond.
Sam had an idea this time, but they would have to wait until the dead of night, when all the Elves had either passed out drunk or gone to sleep, and you never knew with Elves--they were quite the partiers.
That night after dinner, there were four Elf Maidens who were going to present a dance for Gandalf to welcome him officially. They would have done it sooner, but their shampoo shipment had been late, and they couldn't possibly dance without their hair being washed with Herbel Essences first.
The Hobbits watched the Elves with mild curiosity. Aragorn looked uncomfortable because the Elf Maidens were goggling at him. What no one knew was that Aragorn was whispering to himself over and over 'Arwen...think Arwen...'. Arwen on the other hand had no idea of what was going on because she on a shopping spree in Lothlorien with Galadriel and wouldn't be returning until the next day.
The Hobbits were quite happy to find that there was plenty of Ale to go around that night... Merry and Pippin insisted on dancing as well. They had ended on top of a table and were dancing the Funky Chicken instead of their usual dance, too drunk to know the difference and were singing at the top of their lungs.
"You can search far and wide, you can drink the whole town dry, But you'll never find a beer so brown, as the one we drink in our home town! You can keep your fancy ales, you can drink 'em by the flagon, but the only brew for the brave and true, comes from the Green Dragon!"
After their song they somehow managed to spill Ale all over the table and they both fell off. Merry had fallen into a chair that broke to pieces--"That was hand-carved Mahogany!" Elrond screeched--and Pippin's fall had been broken by an abnormally large cat who shrieked. Being drunk, Merry and Pippin mistaked this for a Ring Wraith and ran out of the room screaming. The Elves crackd up laughing, while Aragorn and Gandalf sulked in their chairs.
Sam rolled his eyes and followed them out, where he found them hiding up in a tree. "Oi! Get down!" The two Hobbits shook their heads vigorously. Sam threatened to set the cat on them so they immediately climbd down. "Good...now...we still have to find them. I'm not even sure there are any here, but we've gotta look." Merry and Pippin nodded. They were swaying dangerously. Sam sighed and led them to the pond where he promptly pushed them in. Both Hobbits came out, glarring daggers at Sam. Sam only shrugged. At least they were sober now. The Hobbits spent a good deal of two hours looking for exactly what they needed. Finally, they found it in the same storehouse. Merry stared at the storehouse for a moment. "That is so weird...it's like that thing has everything in it." He shook his head.
The Hobbits returned to their rooms, waiting for at least 3:00 to come around. Turns out Sam was the only one still awake. That's predictable. He shook the other two awake. Pippin was harder to wake than Merry.
"No...I don't want to go to school, mum, the kids make fun of me." Sam and Merry raised their eyebrows and poured a bucket of cold water over Pippin, and I'll tell you that is quite a shocker.
"Ah!....grrrr! It's you..."
"Yes, it is us! And get up Pip, we're gonna have some fun!"
Pippin suddenly became much more awake. He bounced out of bed, eager to cause some trouble. Merry had a bundle in his arms that was covered in a cloak. "Okay! Let's go!"
The Hobbits crept out and made their way to the front door. Once outside, they creeped along the side of Elrond's maze of a house until they came to his window. Sniggering, they pulled black cloaks on, then Merry pulled the cloak off the bundle. Fireworks. Pippin sniggered a little loudly and they heard a snore from Elrond's window.
Sam made sure they stuck it in the ground, then with tender and flint, he managed a spark and the fuse caught fire. The three of them flung themselves under a bush and watched with smirks as the fuse hit the bottom and the firework rocketed into the sky and exploded in a fury of colored sparks.
That's when they heard a shout and somebody had jumped out of the window. The three were frozen with fear as they saw a dark figure holding a staff standing over them.
"Meriodic Brandybuck and Peregrin Took. I might have known...but Samwise...you do drop the Eaves a lot but I never would have expected this from you."
The Hobbits tried to put on a fake grin, but Pippin asked, "You're not going to make us was dishes are you?"
"No...I've thought of a better use for you..."
::Next:: Soon, I can assure you! I hope you like the chapter, please review! Thanks! Oh and if you must flame, please have a good reason. Note: It is supposed to be stupidly funny. Disclaimer:: None of it belongs to me...HA! There! Okay! Now we're good!
Chapter 3
Merry, Pippin, and Sam had barely escaped the wrath of Elrond. The next day, Elrond's hair was Elf-perfect, although they still got nasty looks from. Despite the nasty looks, the Hobbits were far from being done with tormenting Elrond.
Sam had an idea this time, but they would have to wait until the dead of night, when all the Elves had either passed out drunk or gone to sleep, and you never knew with Elves--they were quite the partiers.
That night after dinner, there were four Elf Maidens who were going to present a dance for Gandalf to welcome him officially. They would have done it sooner, but their shampoo shipment had been late, and they couldn't possibly dance without their hair being washed with Herbel Essences first.
The Hobbits watched the Elves with mild curiosity. Aragorn looked uncomfortable because the Elf Maidens were goggling at him. What no one knew was that Aragorn was whispering to himself over and over 'Arwen...think Arwen...'. Arwen on the other hand had no idea of what was going on because she on a shopping spree in Lothlorien with Galadriel and wouldn't be returning until the next day.
The Hobbits were quite happy to find that there was plenty of Ale to go around that night... Merry and Pippin insisted on dancing as well. They had ended on top of a table and were dancing the Funky Chicken instead of their usual dance, too drunk to know the difference and were singing at the top of their lungs.
"You can search far and wide, you can drink the whole town dry, But you'll never find a beer so brown, as the one we drink in our home town! You can keep your fancy ales, you can drink 'em by the flagon, but the only brew for the brave and true, comes from the Green Dragon!"
After their song they somehow managed to spill Ale all over the table and they both fell off. Merry had fallen into a chair that broke to pieces--"That was hand-carved Mahogany!" Elrond screeched--and Pippin's fall had been broken by an abnormally large cat who shrieked. Being drunk, Merry and Pippin mistaked this for a Ring Wraith and ran out of the room screaming. The Elves crackd up laughing, while Aragorn and Gandalf sulked in their chairs.
Sam rolled his eyes and followed them out, where he found them hiding up in a tree. "Oi! Get down!" The two Hobbits shook their heads vigorously. Sam threatened to set the cat on them so they immediately climbd down. "Good...now...we still have to find them. I'm not even sure there are any here, but we've gotta look." Merry and Pippin nodded. They were swaying dangerously. Sam sighed and led them to the pond where he promptly pushed them in. Both Hobbits came out, glarring daggers at Sam. Sam only shrugged. At least they were sober now. The Hobbits spent a good deal of two hours looking for exactly what they needed. Finally, they found it in the same storehouse. Merry stared at the storehouse for a moment. "That is so weird...it's like that thing has everything in it." He shook his head.
The Hobbits returned to their rooms, waiting for at least 3:00 to come around. Turns out Sam was the only one still awake. That's predictable. He shook the other two awake. Pippin was harder to wake than Merry.
"No...I don't want to go to school, mum, the kids make fun of me." Sam and Merry raised their eyebrows and poured a bucket of cold water over Pippin, and I'll tell you that is quite a shocker.
"Ah!....grrrr! It's you..."
"Yes, it is us! And get up Pip, we're gonna have some fun!"
Pippin suddenly became much more awake. He bounced out of bed, eager to cause some trouble. Merry had a bundle in his arms that was covered in a cloak. "Okay! Let's go!"
The Hobbits crept out and made their way to the front door. Once outside, they creeped along the side of Elrond's maze of a house until they came to his window. Sniggering, they pulled black cloaks on, then Merry pulled the cloak off the bundle. Fireworks. Pippin sniggered a little loudly and they heard a snore from Elrond's window.
Sam made sure they stuck it in the ground, then with tender and flint, he managed a spark and the fuse caught fire. The three of them flung themselves under a bush and watched with smirks as the fuse hit the bottom and the firework rocketed into the sky and exploded in a fury of colored sparks.
That's when they heard a shout and somebody had jumped out of the window. The three were frozen with fear as they saw a dark figure holding a staff standing over them.
"Meriodic Brandybuck and Peregrin Took. I might have known...but Samwise...you do drop the Eaves a lot but I never would have expected this from you."
The Hobbits tried to put on a fake grin, but Pippin asked, "You're not going to make us was dishes are you?"
"No...I've thought of a better use for you..."
::Next:: Soon, I can assure you! I hope you like the chapter, please review! Thanks! Oh and if you must flame, please have a good reason. Note: It is supposed to be stupidly funny. Disclaimer:: None of it belongs to me...HA! There! Okay! Now we're good!