Open Your Eyes: The Trials

"And through it all she offers me protection a lot of love and affection
Whether I'm right or wrong and down the waterfall"

- Robbie Williams

Illyria could see the harbor slowly disappearing from her sight as the ship distanced itself further from Los Angeles. Sitting down on a near by cargo box she could feel an inexplicable sensation in her stomach, as if it was tying itself into a knot. Bringing her leather clad hand to her, also, leather clad stomach she wondered what could be wrong. She knew that the sensation was due to her journey and what awaited her in Africa.

Sighing to herself she found herself wishing for Wesley to be by her side, he was unlike anyone she had ever encountered in her endless years of life. Not only was Wesley strong and cunning as a warrior should be, but he was also tender and poetic. If she closed her eyes she could recall every single word of his drunken ramblings. Others under the influence of such a vast amount of alcohol would make no sense, but he...he never stopped making sense to her.

"Nothing, no one, gives me rest and I have put it to the test...nothing, no one, gives me rest...the life I live must lead to death" he would constantly repeat over his full glass of scotch. Each night she would sit by his side or at near by corner, observing him and his pain. In the darkness he would sit for hours, starring at the walls during his mourning, but he would never cry. That she respected, found it admirable.

Admiration that had been the prelude to the love she now carried within her for the mortal. She had learned to respect him, follow him without any questions...what other alternative had there been at the time. But now, things were different, no longer was she forced to follow him...she now chose to be by his side. The reason why she now found herself about to embark on such a journey....

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Wesley's eyes flutter open as he slowly regained consciousness. Once he was fully awake his eyes quickly scanned his surrounding, immediately he recognized the walls of the Hyperion. Letting a relieved sigh, he felt as if he had come back home. For an instant he even forgot about the fact that Fred was no longer with him, that instead there was a hollow empty shell left in which lived an ancient God-king.

Closing his eyes once more, he tried to block out the pain that came with all of the knowledge in his head. Things were so muddled at the moment. How in the world would he ever make sense of his life? Where would he begin?

As for Illyria he only hoped that she would grow tire of him and leave for good. Seeing her day in and day out, wearing Fred's face as if it were a mask hurt him deep down in his weary soul. Although, honestly with each passing day she looked less like Fred...the cold metallic blue making her seem as if a stranger, but there were still those instances when she would slip into full Fred mode making him sometimes wonder if she was truly gone for good. Perhaps there still remained a bit of Fred inside of Illyria deep down inside.

Scanning the corners of the room, where she usually liked to dwell he found himself surprised not to see her. He would of wagered his soul a few seconds ago that she would be waiting for him to wake up, but she was nowhere in sight.

Maybe his wish had been granted...but did he truly desire it? Having her with him was a both a joy and a pain and the same could be said about her absence.

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"What do you wish to attain from me?" the powerful demon asked as he studied the blue creature before him. She wasn't a vampire or any other ordinary demon – that he could immediately sense.

"You're a God! Why would a go need the help of a mere demon as myself?" he asked, a fury strong in his tone. Gods such as her were ancient and looked down upon any other living creature, seizing them and bending them to her will.

"I was once a powerful God. Millions worshipped before my feet, but times have change. This world is no longer same. I no longer whole dominance over anyone and do not wish to, except for my guide. I wish to please him, have him worship at my feet. Not out of fear though, out of love. The only way such devotion can be accomplished is by becoming human...I wish to become a mortal.

"Well, the mighty have fallen! A God-king dying for the love of a mortal!" the demon explained in pure delight.

"Can you help me?" Illyria asked calmly, watching herself since she could effortlessly snap him in two, but she needed him.

"Yes, I will help you but first you must endure many trials, each different and challenging. I warn you, not many make it...." With that the demon disappeared leaving Illyria alone in the darkness.

She could hear something breathing loudly, but it was quickly eclipsed by the voice of the demon.

"Your first trial has begun; you must fight the creature presented to you in absolute darkness, your love for the mortal guiding you to victory."

Illyria blue eyes try adjust themselves to the darkness, she could barely make out the outline of a large figure before her. Moving back a few steps she positioned herself for an attack, but found herself being hit from the back. Immediately her body was thrust to the wall and her face collided with the stone.

Grunting in anger she now felt the rage of a thousand Gods flowing within her, moving her fist backwards she delivered an earth shattering blow to the beast completely killing him instantly. As soon as he fell light fell upon her again and the demon as well.

"Good, but this is only the beginning, now the real trials have begun." And with that Illyria found himself standing at her throne looking down at her glorious army. But this time they were not broken piles of stone, instead they were alive and roaring with reverence towards her.

She could feel her chest tightening at the sight of the one thing she had wanted the most during her long sleep. Looking to the side she could see the demon smiling down upon the crowd.

"Your army Illyria, they are once more alive and willing to do whatever you ask of them. Does it not please you to have them once more? Your plans can be finally carried out...the world can be yours once more! Go, address them, lead them..." he encouraged her.

Taking a step forward she began to raise her arms as she would to command their attention, but then caught herself realizing that she did not wish to rule anymore...at least, not this army. She only wished to be the ruler of one and that was Wesley.

Scanning the crowd one more time she remembered the joy that all this use to bring her, but now it no longer had the same effect. The only pleasure, for her, now came from looking into his blue eyes, when he would momentarily forget who she really was. The love that radiated forth during those instances before he caught himself was enough to block out the cries of devotion from the large army.

Taking a step back and retreating from the large crowd of devotees she turned around to regard the demon, "I do not wish to rule them anymore" she simply stated and moved passed him to find herself once more in the cave.

"I offer you the world and you reject it...you've pass the second trial."

"You said the trials would be hard and yet I see they are not" Illyria's impatience was clear.

"We've come to the last trial...I said they would be hard because they are base upon your own weaknesses and desires. You desired to have your army once more, but your love for the mortal has completely rid you of it. By declining the chance to rule the world once more you have truly chosen love over power and pride – your weaknesses."

"Then what is this last trial base upon?"

"The most important thing of all...love. You must justify your love for the mortal...." Illyria's eyes connected with the demon's, she was about to open her mouth to explain, but his last words stop her, "...not to me, but to yourself".

Suddenly she now found herself in a white room starring at herself. Although, this image of herself was quite different since it was her actual true form. She had forgotten how strong and powerful her true form had been. Having grown accustomed to the small figure and hands of the shell....

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"Are you sure about this Wes? Don't you want to stay, help us start up Angel Investigations once more?" Angel tried to reason with Wesley, without him starting over again would be too hard and he would miss him. No matter how many differences between them he had grown to love the Englishman as he would his own brother.

"I'm sure Angel. I just can't do this anymore, the memories are far too painful and overwhelming...everywhere I turn I'm reminded of her." Wesley said in a distant voice.

"Where will you go?" Spike chirped in from his seat on top of the reception desk.

Looking over at the blonde vampire, Wesley gave him a small smile. "I don't know, but as soon as I figure it out I'll notify the both of you. Good luck with everything, but I have to leave now."

Taking one last glance at the Hyperion Wesley began to make his way out of the hotel, but was stopped by Angel's hand on his arm. The two men looked at each other and moved in for a hug. Normally Angel would never exhibit such affection, but this was Wes. The nerdy ex-watcher that had annoyed him to death in the beginning and now he was leaving for good.

"Remember, our doors are always open to you" Angel said as Wesley moved further away from him.

"I know" he simply answered and he was gone for good.

Walking out to his car Wesley got in and turned on the ignition. Where he would go now still a mystery to him, but the more distance he put between L.A. and himself the better. As for Illyria she would find him eventually that he was sure of and if not...he did not know.

TBC