You don't remember me
But I remember you
I lie awake and try so hard
Not to think of you
-Evanescence
A/N: Now, I promise this will be longer!
In an anonymous review for my last chapter, Awakened, they mentioned that they were finding all the switches of vision annoying. Now, when I first started this fic, the switches were extremely useful but now they are becoming a bit irritating to write too. So, I've decided to make these changes far less prominent – only one POV per chapter with more for special occasions. I just wanted to apologise if these changes posed any inconveniences for you guys in the past… I hope you understand, they were just useful to explain a few things! Enjoy the chapter guys!!
Ummm and I wanted to say to the person who accused me of copying this storyline: There's a lot of fics on this site and there's a good chance that someone thinks the same way I do. I DID NOT copy this fic and if you still think I did get over it and don't read it if it bothers you so much.
To all of my reviewers: especially Belle, Granger-gurl-rox and Enchanted Dragon (And Arch! Miss you heaps!) (If I forgot you and you wrote a decent review sorry) thanks so much. You are my light and inspiration and if it weren't for you I would have quit by now and gone back to my poetry. OK, enough with the teary clichés: Enjoy the chapter! I love you all!
PS: I don't like Harry Potter movies much at all. In fact, I would much prefer that they did not exist. Someone asked me in an e-mail and I just thought I should answer that question now for no apparent reason. If there is anyone that actually agrees, please tell me in reviews. It would be nice to have SOMEONE who takes my side for once… Thanks guys! Oh and what do you guys all think of the title for the next book?? Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince… I don't mind it myself.…could be interesting…cough OK I AM PRACTICALLY DYING WITH SUSPENSE!! (Yes I know most definitely that this is true...got it straight from Rowling's website…)
Disclaimer: I own nothing, but I wish desperately that I owned something (I don't even own this computer)
Draco's POV
That morning – it was Sunday – I did not go to breakfast. Instead I lay on the floor of my room for three hours without moving. I thought about my mother, my father…Hell, I even thought about Quidditch. But I purposely avoided the fact that I had, last night, tried to end my own life. After a while I decided to get up and do something useful and completed a few essays mechanically.
When I had put down my quill after a rather laborious Transfiguration assignment – which I finished in an hour, nonetheless – there was a light knock on the door that sounded somewhat hesitant. "Come in," I said nonchalantly. (A/N: I USED THE WORD, ARCH!)
I was half surprised to see Granger step in. She treaded with caution, as though she was expecting me to throw her out. And I wanted to. I still wasn't sure if I wanted to thank her for saving me the night before, but while it remained unresolved I didn't want to see her. Come to think of it, I didn't want to see anyone.
"What do you want?" I asked coldly, not really expecting a valid answer.
"I…I wanted to apologise," she said finally, to my great surprise. "I know that things haven't been easy for you at all and I…I think I can understand why you would do that." She swallowed, making it look even more as though she had rehearsed her little speech over and over. "But at the same time, I'm glad I stopped you from – from doing that," she said, with newfound vigour. "You shouldn't let your father get the better of you."
"Look, Granger," I said, trying to sound indifferent. "First, how dare you read private letters addressed to me? And second, I did what I did last night knowing completely well what was going to happen if I succeeded. Do you think that I didn't think it over, weigh it up…whatever you Mudbloods call it?"
She looked hurt when I used my favourite word. "No." She didn't sound careful anymore. "I know that you're hurting, Malfoy, but d'you think I could have just left you there? Just walk in and see you there – "Oh, oops, you're committing suicide – sorry, didn't mean to disturb. Good luck with that"? I know we don't get along very well, but you don't deserve to die like that."
"Get out," I said quietly. "I'm busy. I don't have time for this right now."
She gave me one more concerned – yet annoyed – look and left the room, letting the door swing shut behind her.
I should have thanked her, I realized. She really did save my life, even if I didn't exactly ask for it…well, now I'm screwed. (A/N: I know that last comment isn't exactly a typical Malfoy expression but it's something I say all the time so I put it in coz it kinda suits the scenario.)
In that moment, I knew I had to thank her…and apologise for what I'd just said. Oh, shit….
I stood up, took a deep breath, and strode over to the door. I opened it and stepped out into the common room that was still dim despite the sunlight flooding through the stained-glass. Granger was curled up on the couch with…you guessed it. A book…if you could call it that. It was more like some kind of brick.
"Granger…I'm sorry for what I just said." She looked up in astonishment.
"And I wanted to thank you from…from stopping me last night."
"It's fine," she said, grinning. "What made you swallow the Malfoy pride, anyway?"
"I didn't…wha- Well, Malfoys have honour, too. It's not like I said that just to…just to…"
"Just to what?" she asked, looking highly amused.
"Just to….get in your pants." It was true. Ordinarily, I would have only said something like that to make the girl think I actually like them. But I was feeling something more than a physical attraction…a true rarity in my case.
She had burst out laughing. "What makes you think you could get in my pants, anyway?"
No! This conversation is going entirely in the wrong direction…
"I never wanted in your pants." I said coolly. "I only apologised because I knew I had to-"
"Oh, come off it." She still hadn't stopped laughing. This was extremely infuriating.
"Look, I really am sorry, OK?" I turned and stalked back to my room.
When I got back to my room, I was unsure of what to do. I had finished all of the homework we had been set and studied for a History of Magic exam that I had the next day. I couldn't see my Slytherin "friends" as they weren't speaking to me anymore. I couldn't owl anyone because my father was in Azkaban and my mother was dead… I took out a book I had been reading and headed out to the common room.
I hadn't expected Granger to be there, but she was. She was in Muggle clothes, as did almost everyone on weekends. She was wearing long, tight jeans and a white tank top with the words "Dump Him" lettered in Gothic writing across the front. I sat on the sofa across from her with barely an acknowledgement. As flicked through the pages of my book (To Kill an Augurey) I looked up occasionally, surveying Hermione who was completely absorbed. After glancing up at least three times without managing to catch her eye she caught me looking and offered a tiny smile. I smiled back, though mine was rather forced because I'm not exactly the smiling type.
A/N: Hey guys. I know that that chapter probably wins the Shortness Stakes by a few kilometres but I have to say I'm more than a little stuck here and I need more time to think up what will happen next. Even though I'm on school holidays I have been busy but you can expect more wholesome chapters in the next few days. Thanks for reviewing...hope you guys outdo yourselves this time! Please review!! Love Kelliebean J