Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation, and I'm very saddened by the fact that I do not.
Warnings: uncontrollable fluff, other pairing indications, bad "attempted" use of the Japanese language, and other stuff that I probably didn't mention.
Author's Notes: *dances* Well, not too much up here. Everyone knows I leave my ramblings for after the chapter, but there are a few things I need say. First off, back to Tatsuha! I bet all you Tatsuha fans are ecstatic about that, ne? I hope no one thought I forgot about him. ^_^ Anyway, a little bit of Ayaka bashing, but everyone should know that I don't like her at all. Candy to those who do, but I don't because of certain reasons I'm sure everyone already knows about. Also, more Ryuichi! I'm sure everyone was wondering why he burst out of room like that, and Shu-chan (and Eiri) had something to do with it. O.o Why am I such a masochist? I'm not really sure about that myself. Well, I better stop rambling. I don't want to bore anyone. Oh…almost forgot…Hiro's older brother makes his debut! Everyone glomp Yuji!
With much joy, I happily dedicate this chapter to Silverone! Long live Tachi and Ryuichi!! ^_^ Hope this pleases you!
R&R and enjoy, everyone!!
Track Nine: He Who Wears The Mask
Tatsuha angrily slammed his phone closed, nearly crushing the delicate metal as he fumed, thinking of silently cursing his older brother with another voodoo ritual he'd read about on the Internet. Eiri deserved it, he didn't have to treat him like he had no feelings or emotions to even consider, the youth was so close to shoving a pin into the exquisitely-shaped doll lying on his floor that he could feel his fingers twitching. It wasn't that he actually believed it would work, but something in the act itself was comforting, and Tatsuha shook his head in surrender, flopping agitatedly onto his bed with the phone to his chest. His sibling was hopelessly lost in Shindou Shuichi's charm, and perhaps he shouldn't have told the pink-haired singer that Eiri had liked winding him up; it was obvious that Shuichi was the one who kept the romance novelist on a yo-yo. Tatsuha craned his neck up to stare at the large posters covering the walls above his mattress, and he sighed contentedly at the sight of glossy flesh peeking beneath a skimpy shirt.
He loved Sakuma Ryuichi with a vengeance, but he had never really understood who he had been until he'd met him for the first time, face-to-face. However, he still didn't truly know who he was. The amount of emotional changes he'd seen the singer of Nittle Grasper portray was enough to make anyone question how well off the vocalist actually was, but Tatsuha didn't care. He worshipped Ryuichi, loved his physical attributes just as much as the mental –he was just too kawaii- and he would have done anything for him if he had only asked. It bothered him to know that something haunted his idol, and he couldn't help wondering what Ryuichi had meant when he'd first woken up and had stared into those bottomless crystalline depths.
"...I know you."
But how? Tatsuha had never met him before, despite having Tohma as a brother-in-law and even Shuichi as a friend, but the singer had said it as easily as one breathes and had promptly kissed him afterwards. The sixteen-year-old closed his eyes at the memory, welling in it, and his fingers shakily touched the curve of his mouth. He had never experienced something so shocking, so...awe-inspiring in his life, and the power Ryuichi had held over him at that moment made Tatsuha realize just how weak he really was. He would have given his very life to have it happen again, even if it was just a brushing of lips, but in his mind, Ryuichi would be more insistent, feisty even, and his mouth would be like liquid heaven on his flesh, teasing playfully enough to have him going into shock. He'd never really been submissive in any of the relationships he'd managed to somehow have –with keeping the peace in his family and helping his father with the temple, he'd hardly had time- but for Ryuichi, he would have gladly turned uke to be with him.
Tatsuha grimaced, the pressure in his groin rising as the heat in his face took flame, and he rolled over, pressing his nose into the soft pillow while the phone against his chest crushed into his skin. He couldn't be doing this now, not when there were other things to do –he had to study, sadly, for school, sweep the temple steps, assist in prayer-but he couldn't help it. He was a teenager, who happened to like both sexes equally, though his fascination with Ryuichi made him completely forget about girls, and he wanted to lay there and dream wistfully of the other. He'd always wanted to know how the singer would have felt, being in his arms, and feeling up Shuichi the very first time he'd met him, in his brother's apartment, hadn't really been all that he'd thought it was going to be. In his mind, Ryuichi was supple and agile, not awkward and flaccid against him as Bad Luck's vocalist had been. It hadn't been a very enlightening experience, and he'd made his brother mad, too.
Tatsuha sighed hesitantly in defeat before forcing himself to sit up, the phone wasn't very comfortable being part of his upper ribcage, and he stared down at his hands before glancing at the smiling and sweaty poster of Ryuichi again. There was no use in wishing for something he could not have, Sakuma Ryuichi was 'The Untouchable,' and Tatsuha wasn't in a class high enough to reach him, but…
He still hoped, and that, to him, was more than everything he had.
Abrupt ringing nearly caused the youth to fall to the floor, and he stared at the device in his hand, wondering. It was too late for anyone to actually be calling, if he hadn't insisted on taking a break, he would have still been helping his father and wouldn't have heard about the latest news-breaking story from his sister. Tatsuha just shrugged, knowing that it could have only been important if someone demanded to speak to him at such an outrageous hour. Maybe it was Eiri calling to apologize –he never would, but a younger brother could dream- or maybe it was…
He shook his head and hit a button on the number pad; he had to stop living in a fantasy.
"Moshi moshi?" There was a pause before a feminine voice poured into his ears.
"G-gomen nasai, Tatsuha-san. I-I know that it's late but-"
"Ayaka-chan?" The youth sat up straighter. This was certainly a surprise.
"H-hai. I-I just heard about…on the television…and…will you take me to Tokyo?"
"Doushite?!" He didn't realize that he was asking a stupid question.
"N-Nakano-san…" Reality smacked Tatsuha in the face, and it hurt. "He was…he was…please, Tatsuha-san, take me to Tokyo!"
"D-demo-"
"Onegai? Tatsuha-san, I've never really asked you to do anything until now. Please, this is important to me!" Tatsuha glanced at the clock resting peacefully on the bedside table and groaned inwardly. It was nearly midnight –he had yet to actually complete any of the tasks his father had given him earlier- and Ayaka wanted him to drive her to Tokyo?
What kind of messed world was she living in?
"I…anou…Ayaka-chan, I'd really love to help you, but I don't…have any form of…to-"
"Tatsuha…" Ayaka's voice was quiet, almost on the verge of tears, and the teenager crossed his eyes in frustration, his breath ruffling the bangs hanging over his forehead, before he gave up. He couldn't stand it when women cried; it was a weakness he had.
"Alright," he muttered, running graceful fingers through his mussed mane. "Let me…I need to fix my bike and…we'll leave early tomorrow, ne?" Ayaka squealed excitedly.
"Domo arigato gozaimasu! I-I don't know how to thank you, Tatsuha-kun!"
"It's my pleasure," he lied sincerely, wanting to obliterate the phone by throwing it against the wall. Voodoo was also tempting, but Tatsuha doubted that it worked as well on inanimate objects as it did on people. "I'll see you in a little while."
"H-hai! Arigato, Tatsuha-kun! Arigato! Ja ne!"
"…sure…" A dull ringing ensued, and Tatsuha cursed himself repeatedly as he hung up the phone, aggravated by the circumstances he easily tangled himself in. Ayaka was nice, he liked her out of general intrigue and curiosity, but Tatsuha sometimes doubted her individuality as a person. Aside form the undying love she harbored for his older brother, she seemed overly bland and appeared to not have a personality of her own. Tatsuha couldn't blame her though; her parents were almost as strict as his father was, perhaps more so. Sighing, the teenager blinked himself awake; he was really tired from the unintentional lack of sleep since he'd visited Eiri –he could not get the erotic sounds coming from his brother's bedroom out of his mind- and he smiled secretively to himself as he began gathering the necessary items he would need to perform surgery on his beloved vehicle.
Maybe he would get to see Ryuichi again, and this time, Tatsuha thought, he would be sure to kiss back.
* * *
Ryuichi broke out of the hospital room in a run, nearly slipping on the freshly waxed linoleum in his haste, and he panted, warm wetness bathing his cheeks as fragmented images flashed by him even while he escaped the personal world of Shuichi and his blonde lover. Aizawa smiled at him; Aizawa kissed him tenderly; Aizawa became Tatsuha to comfort his soul… He wanted to scream at the pent-up rage threatening to rupture his heart, and he completely broke down near an area filled with vending machines, his entire body convulsing in fractured tremors at the memories. He was so stupid, and he cried furiously at his ignorance, causing more tears to soak his skin and clothing. He couldn't stop the emotional pain from evolving into something more real than he could explain. His chest was constricted with agony, and it felt as though his ribs were squeezing so tightly around his lungs that it was impossible for him to breathe. Ryuichi couldn't feel anything; he didn't care if he was supposed to be the carefree, childish one anymore. His entire reason for living had just been thrown out the metaphorical window.
The singer sobbed unabashedly against his fingers, nearly gouging his eyes into the palms of his hands, and he wailed achingly in misery, unable to accept the inevitable. Aizawa had come back, there was no denying it –he'd recognized him the moment he'd accidentally looked out the stage curtain- and he'd replayed the entire incident in his mind, trying to convince himself that it hadn't been his beloved who'd done that horrible, unthinkable thing, but his conscience wouldn't let him accept it. Ryuichi had known all along what his lover was truly capable of, but he hadn't believed it. He still couldn't believe it! Aizawa was the type of person to kiss and make it better when he fell, to cheer him up when he was sad, to find it endearing that the portraits he drew looked like a third grader's handiwork, to think him special and not a singing sex symbol. Aizawa was the type of person to look beyond the superficial and accept people for who they were.
Aizawa wasn't a murderer.
"Naa, Ai-chan, why is this in your closet, Na No Da?" Ryuichi's innocent face peeked at his lover from within the darkness he was eagerly exploring, and the grinning face the older man had come to recognize and cherish as truly being Tachi Aizawa stared back at him over the edge of a book he'd been skimming through, an eyebrow raised in silent question.
"Why is what in my closet?" Ryuichi promptly pushed the door aside and sauntered out of the confining space, giggling energetically, and Aizawa lifted his gaze, exchanging words for a sight that left him blinking. The older singer was clad in a tight pink dress, his hips and thighs giving the material shape and leaving nothing to the imagination. Kumagoro-san was clutched loosely between his crossed arms as he spun in a circle, and Ryuichi hopped over to where Aizawa rested a moment later, carefully ignoring the mess of cookies he'd left on the floor.
"This! Isn't it pretty, Na No Da?" Aizawa slipped off of his bed, smirking mischievously, and he caught the edge of the dress, tugging Ryuichi impossibly close with an easy flick of his wrist. His fingers slowly began to pull up the delicate clothing, revealing inches of shapely leg, and a warm splash of red spread across Ryuichi's cheeks.
"Very pretty, but I think…you'll look even prettier…without it on," he murmured seductively, his mouth sucking gently at the flesh beneath the other's jaw. Ryuichi shivered before falling backwards, his legs unable to support him, and Aizawa tumbled after him onto the mattress, laughing playfully as Ryuichi stared hungrily up at him. "Hai…very pretty." And, he proceeded to steal his breath with those hungry kisses he always dreamed about.
"Aizawa-" His name dove from his mouth in a dead whisper, half-grieving, half-regretful. That had been one of many memories with the gifted vocalist, and he knew Aizawa wasn't a murderer. Aizawa couldn't be a murderer. He was the persona that Ryuichi remembered –sweet, kind, and forever loving- and he couldn't have been the demon of his nightmares, the one he was eternally afraid to touch or look at. But, if it were true, if that unforgivable sin was somehow true, Ryuichi remained more a monster than anyone, including his treacherously perfect lover. He had treated people so terribly, had turned his back on Shuichi when the younger singer had needed his friends the most, and he didn't deserve the respect he was given. Already, he lived in a grave, forgotten and childish.
He didn't deserve anything.
"I…I don't mean to bother you, but…it looks as though you could use one of these," a strange voice whispered softly, forcing Ryuichi to stifle a sob long enough for him to get a good look at the person crouching beside him, a handkerchief dangling from his long fingers. There was a crooked smile on the man's handsome face, eyes a faded shade of blue sparkling at him, and Ryuichi had to return the expression of kindness despite the pain conquering his heart; he couldn't help it. The mysterious person wore his hair semi-long, raggedly cut in a self-attempt at grooming it into neatness, and the color was familiar, though the remains of a badly done dye job was evident among its lustrous maroon hue.
"A-arig-gat-to," he sniffed, wiping his eyes with the corners of the cloth he had accepted from him.
"No problem at all," the man answered, winking brightly at him. It was then Ryuichi noticed a pair of sunglasses held locks of his hair out of his eyes and that a bag was slung around his neck. He briefly wondered what it was for. "Someone as cute as you shouldn't be crying your eyes out in a hospital." The singer blushed.
"I-I couldn't help i-it," he tried to explain, recalling the agony still occupying his thoughts, and he began to cry again, unable to control the flood of tears. A hand touched his shoulder.
"There, there. Everything will be fine! Do you mind if I share a secret with you?" There wasn't enough time for Ryuichi to answer since the man continued, obviously liking the sound of his own voice. "You see…my brother's here…and I'm not sad because I know he's a tough son of a…ah, well, I shouldn't say it like that. Be making fun of my own mother. You get the idea, ne?" Ryuichi nodded solemnly, thinking to have laughed if he'd been able to. He liked this stranger, he was so incredibly nice to him without obviously expecting anything back, and all he could do was sit and cry like the child he impersonated with finesse. There was a powerful laugh, and Ryuichi blinked through his tears to examine the other more thoroughly; he was so familiar. His features were almost delicate, but the masculinity of his smile remained strong and confident, and he looked like… He looked like…
"Who-who are you?" Another heart-wrenching grin.
"Nakano Yuji desu." Ryuichi couldn't grasp the familiarity, though it was verbally slapping him in the face, and Yuji shook his head, tendrils of red caressing his high cheekbones. "I'm not famous yet, but maybe you know my younger bro? Tall? Long hair? Plays guitar?" He mimicked the motion with fluid grace, and Ryuichi smirked kindly, rubbing the back of his hand over his eyes, smearing tears across his nose.
"I-I like to play guitar," he whispered, earning a pat on his bicep.
"Hounto ni?"
"Demo…I-I'm not very good at it." There was a laugh.
"You can't excel at everything you do." A pause. "What do you do, then? You seem so familiar."
"He sings," a voice interrupted, bringing their attention to the diminutive blonde-haired man standing in the mix of shadows and light. His smile was warm, gleaming teeth shining mysteriously in the darkness, but the unrecognizable emotion flickering in his inquisitive, though judging eyes was disturbing to look at any longer than a few seconds. Yuji stood, respectfully putting distance between himself and Ryuichi, and Tohma slowly walked forward, concern washing over him as he examined the singer with relish and alarm. His ragged hair clung to his tear-stained face, plastered to his cheeks like a second skin, and his eyes were a liquid blue, so deep and sodden that he knew Ryuichi was lost with only a glance into them.
His Ryuichi was suffering.
"Daijoubu desu-ka…Ryuichi-san?" His voice remained soft.
And, Tohma was unprepared for the reaction given to him.
"I-I want to go home," Ryuichi sobbed, tears once again rolling down to splash on the floor. "I-I want…I want…" The word that left the singer's lips caused the former keyboardist's heart to stop and then ache so deeply it actually brought a stinging sensation to the back of his eyes.
What had he done? What had he done?
Aizawa-
TBC-
A/N: Well, how did everyone like Tatsuha's determination to get Ryuichi to notice him? What about Ryuichi's flashback? Was Yuji what you expected? Honestly, I was worried about writing in the older Nakano because I'm not very aware of his personality, since he makes few appearances in the manga and none at all in the anime, but I think I did well. O.o Well, let me know. ^_^ Wow, I guess I don't have much else to ramble about…that's strange!
Reviews:
StarryEyedChick: *bows* Yes, I know I'm evil. Is it because I teased about the lemon later on? ^_^ I suppose it is. According to my beta reader, I'm a teasing whore. Everyone should listen to her. Yeah! I got Eiri in character…which is difficult to do since the man must have at least three different personalities every time he turns around. O.o Awww, you feel sorry for Ryu-chan? I suppose I'd be lying if I said that I didn't, but I suppose you must live with the choices you make, which Ryuichi is learning the difficult way. Glad you liked the Tohma/Eiri interaction. I couldn't write Tohma to save my life, and that's the truth; it's awful. I hoped this chapter was to your liking, and I want more of What You Give!! I love that fic to death!!
Joan Mistress of Magic: O.o Am I really that horrible of a teaser? Well, then I suppose I should get shot. Heh…I didn't mean it literally. Was this fast enough for you? Did you like this chapter?!
Silverone: ^_^ I dedicated the chapter to you because I know how much you like Tachi and Ryuichi. Was it okay? What's Yuki going to do to Shu? Hmmm…wait and read. Does Shuichi stay with Yuki or choose Hiro? Which do you think he would do, considering the events, thus far, in the fic? (Oh, and I already know the answer to this, by the way. :P) What's Ryuichi going to do? Well, he pretty much did what he was going to do, but I can promise a little bit of Ryu*Tohma interaction…*evil grin* *wink*
Lara: Thank you! Thank you! I am aware of just how evil I am. I'm glad you approve. Heh, I left the end of chapter eight that way for a reason, and Ryuichi was crying, well, because seeing Eiri and Shu together really upset him. O.o He realized just how much he missed his precious Ai-chan. ^_^ Oh, and I hope I stay the best, too.
Punky Girl and Emerald wind: Yes, it was an evil cliffhanger, wasn't it? Heh, sorry to say this, but if I leave another cliffhanger *cough* next chapter *cough* then I'm sure you will hate me even more. This one wasn't as bad, I admit. Hope it was okay!
EternalDreamLand:*dances* Hurray! You reviewed! I'm glad you've been following my story, though. Is everything to your liking? Do I have any of the characters out of character? Is the plot okay? As you can probably tell, I'm really insecure. O.o Don't worry about being lazy…JUST REVIEW! LOL. *bows* Thank you!
Mirai Aria: Don't worry, Aria, I wasn't waiting for you, though I'm flattered that you think I was. I'm just lazy…and a teasing whore, or so Pat San says. I suppose she's right. *shrug* Alas, I know…the chapters don't hold as much as they did, but I promise that it will get better. I'm just trying to build it up for the heartbreak and love triangle –er- square –er- straight line? thing that's going to happen. SHHH! It's a secret!! ^_^ Oh, Shu didn't do anything to really trigger Ryu's outburst. It was basically the entire "lovey-dovey" scene going on between him and Eiri that made him upset. You would be, too, ne? Oh, oh…don't you just love surprises? You want to know what's going to happen when Eiri finds out? Want to know another secret? What if he never finds out? *gasp* I better shut up…no more outta me. Hope this chapter had a little more in it for you! ^_^
Lilyleia: Though you only got to chapter two, I'm glad you're enjoying this! Tragically, TOOG is going ever so slowly, and my beta is just trying to make me write more so she can get her "dirty" little fingers on it before anyone else. LOL. Well, I hope when you get back from your little trip that you'll read and review. I always love to hear what others have to say…good, bad, the slightly weird and paranormal…*blush* Wonderfully written? TOOG? THANK YOU! *glomp* I feel honored. The phrases? Yes, my beta loves some of them, too. She gets jealous sometimes, but I'm practically green because of the success she's getting, but I'm glad for her!! ^_^ Tatsuha and Ryuichi's relationship? Wouldn't everyone just love to know what I'm going to do with that? Heh…
Naeda: Shame, shame, Nae-chan. ^_^ LOL. I'm glad you like my writing! It means so much to me that people like it! It really does. Don't let people get you down, either. You're turning out to be an awesome writer!!
Black Dios: Ah, I always love the reviews you leave! They make me all bubbly and laughable inside. Eh, does that make sense? Probably not. *nods* Yes, I agree. Pat San is being naughty because she hasn't updated, but don't worry! As her beta, I am officially compelled each day to poke her about giving me chapter 10 so I can beta it! I've read some, and it's going to blow everyone out of the water! ^_^ Now, don't fight with Red Moon, either…eh, well, she disappeared into the Swirling Vortex of DOOM. Nevermind. ^_~
Aiko-chan: *glomp* I feel honored that you reviewed, and yes, I believe Mending Hearts is totally awesome. I hate you for the pure, simple fact that you can write Tohma and I can't. *cries* I love you, girl! Keep up the awesome work, and I want chapter three!!
O.o Woah…that was a lot of answers. LOL. Everyone has so many questions, and I wish I could answer them ALL, but where would the fun in reading the fic be? Heh, I'm just a teasing whore…please ignore me. Anyway, as always, my last shout out goes to by super-talented, should-be-worshipped, already has a shrine to her, beta reader, Pat San. Dammit, Pat-chan, you make me feel so insignificant, but that's okay. You're gracing all of us with your totally excellent writing skills, and I'm sure everyone has already gone and read Hierarchies, of Games and Tables that's on www.gurabiteshiyon.net. ^_^ If you're a Tohma*Shu lover, you will definitely want to read this fic. It is SUPERB! Kudos to you, my lovable beta reader, you are amazing! Love you lots!!
Okay, now that I'm done with that, how about a teaser for the next chapter? Yes, the teasing whore has struck again. Here:
He didn't want Eiri threatening to do harmful things to Hiro before he'd even had a chance to talk with the guitarist first, and Shuichi was desperate to know what was on Hiro's mind.
Why had he done that to him? More importantly, why had Shuichi let him? He shyly peeked over at the writer through strands of pink, nearly pouting.
"Naa, Yuki-" Blazing golden eyes stabbed into his gaze before flickering back to the road.
"Quiet." A think silence floated over the interior of the foreign vehicle after that, leaving the singer feeling even worse than he already did. He didn't want Eiri threatening to do harmful things to Hiro before he'd even had a chance to talk with the guitarist first, and Shuichi was desperate to know what was on Hiro's mind.
Oh, and just for StarryEyedChick (and all of those that are curious):
"Shu-" His tongue began tracing a hot path across Hiro's lips, momentarily flicking inside his gaping mouth to taste the plain toothpaste on his breath, and the vocalist moaned, incapable of curbing the fervor eating him alive. The guitarist tried speaking, wanting to get the savory, strawberry-smelling youth off of him –Shuichi wasn't in his right mind, and he couldn't take advantage of this situation- but his arms were banding around Shuichi's back instead of pushing him away, and his fingers were sliding up his sides, caressing the warm, fragrant skin he so desperately craved to stroke.
Well, I'm evil, and I'm proud to admit. ^_^
REVIEW!!