Chapter Twenty
"It's there!" Laurie said in exasperation as Sam flew past her for the second time looking for his cell phone. "Slow down."
"Yeah," he answered distractedly as he patted his pockets. "I've got my wallet…I don't need my wallet," he looked up at Laurie who was standing by the door with her arms folded, "I don't need my wallet, right? I'm just going straight there and then straight back." He pulled it from his jacket and placed it on the table. "But I should probably take it because-"
"Sam!" Laurie's cry had the desired effect and Sam stilled instantly and looked at her. "Slow down!" She emphasised both words and stared at Sam until he took a deep breath and nodded. A knock at the door told them that the agent who was driving Sam to court was ready. "You okay?"
"Yeah, sorry, I just…yeah." Sam picked up his wallet and coat and walked towards the door. He paused before he reached it. "I'm going to throw up." He turned away from Laurie and took a few deep breaths before slowly turning around again. "False alarm," he mumbled but then stopped again and swallowed deeply.
"Are you going to chuck or not?"
Sam considered the question before replying. "Not."
Laurie opened the door and grabbing Sam's hand, walked him down to the waiting car.
Most of the televisions in the West Wing were tuned to CNN. Mael's trial had attracted a great deal of media interest and reports from the courthouse were being constantly updated. Toby sat at his desk chewing on a pencil listening to the latest reporter desperately trying to fill in the minutes before Sam's arrival. A few moments later he heard the words 'Sam Seaborn' and 'arrived' and looked at the screen again. The front of the courthouse had been cordoned off and Sam only had to walk a few steps from the car to the entrance. Toby couldn't see his face but he could see the tension in Sam's shoulders as he walked quickly up the few stairs and into the court. Toby walked over to the set and switched it off and returned to his desk.
In her office Laurie did the same thing. Sam had insisted that she didn't go into the court with him or attend the trial. When she asked him why he had explained that the last thing they needed was pictures of them together splashed all over the papers again. Although Laurie had protested, Sam insisted and had won the argument. Laurie knew he was right: after the scandal of the photo she had built a new life in Boston and she had no desire to revisit that particular episode of her life.
Sam spent the day sitting in the corridor outside the courtroom with Jake, the agent who had driven down to Boston with him and Ron. He hadn't expected to be called today. He had thought about going in to watch the trial but changed his mind at the last moment. After their third cup of coffee, Sam discovered that Jake sailed in his spare time. The ensuing conversation took them through lunch and into the afternoon. By the time Sam's lawyer appeared and told him he wasn't going to be called today, Sam had relaxed enough to realise that he was starving and they called into the canteen before going back to Laurie's.
By the time she arrived home from work, Sam and Jake were sitting in front of Sam's laptop deep in conversation. Sam looked up when he heard Laurie enter, "I wasn't called. I didn't think I would be."
"Neither did I," Laurie said as she walked towards her bedroom squeezing Sam's shoulder on the way. A few moments later she emerged, her trouser suit replaced with sweat pants and a jumper, and walked over to the table were the two men sat.
She offered Sam a coffee and did a double take when Jake replied as well. "Shouldn't you be outside looking for suspicious men smoking big cigars?"
"Or big men smoking suspicious cigars," Sam mumbled as he scrolled down the page of yachts to find the one he'd been telling Jake about.
"I'm off shift," Jake explained. "Any cookies going for grabs?"
When Jake left, Sam ordered a takeout and an hour later he and Laurie were on the sofa surrounded by empty food cartons.
"Did you go in to court?" Laurie asked after Sam had run out of topics that had nothing to do with courts or trials or Mael.
"No, I was going to but then I changed my mind..." Sam's voice trailed off.
Laurie moved closer to Sam and placed her hand on the side of his face. "You're doing great, Sam. You're so much stronger than you realise."
Sam heard the sound of his cries as Incul grabbed his hand. He saw himself pleading with him, begging him. He closed his eyes, forcing the images away.
"You're hot, is the heating too high?" she asked as she ran her hand up towards Sam's forehead.
"I'm fine but I think I better get some sleep." Mirroring Laurie's actions of the day before, Sam took hold of her hand and kissed it. Laurie waited until Sam was in bed before she pulled out her briefcase and started to look over the work she had brought home. She worked for an hour and had been asleep for two more when Sam's cries woke her. She walked quickly to his room and switched on the lamp before calling his name and waiting for him to wake. After he had worked out where he was, Sam immediately apologised, told her he was fine and turned away. Two hours later Laurie woke to the same sounds. Sam apologised again but this time the apologies were interspersed with gasps for breath and mumbled curses. Laurie climbed into the bed, "If you're going to keep waking me up I might as well stay here."
Sam lay still on his side. After a while though he turned onto his back and sighed, "Okay then." He rearranged his pillows and lay back down. "But no funny business." He yelped as Laurie slapped him on the arm and soon fell asleep. With Laurie beside him, it was the best sleep he'd had since he'd been discharged from the hospital.
The sense of peace Sam woke with didn't last long. Sounds from the kitchen drifted into his room but by the time he was showered and dressed his stomach was already dancing at the thought of what the day might bring.
"Grapefruit, cereal and toast," Laurie announced as he entered the kitchen.
"That looks really great but I don't think I-"
"Sit down," Laurie ordered and Sam obediently sat at the table. She sat opposite him and finished her coffee. "Try it dry," Laurie suggested of the toast that Sam was staring at as if it was going to jump off the plate at him.
"Is that a Boston thing?"
"No, it's a how to eat when you feel like puking thing."
"Oh," Sam smiled. "Yummy!"
Laurie read the paper as Sam forced the toast down his throat using reluctant sips of orange juice to aid the process. His hand was hurting today and he couldn't control the shaking of it either.
The car arrived and Laurie walked down to it with him. Before he got in, Laurie took hold of his arm. "You can handle anything that happens today, Sam- anything." Sam smiled and nodded. He appreciated the words although secretly he believed that there wasn't much that he could handle these days. It cheered him to think that Laurie believed in him though and he tried to hold on to that as the car pulled away from the sidewalk and he began his journey to the courthouse.
Jake turned around and immediately noticed Sam's pale complexion. The agents assigned to Sam knew that no direct threats had been made against him. They also knew it was unlikely that the FARC or any other organisation would try anything. There wasn't an agent on Ron's team who wasn't aware of how hard he had taken the failure to rescue Sam. The Boston job was being dealt with as if the President himself were making the trip and they all knew that Ron had done all he could to ensure that no aspect of its planning had been left to chance. Sam, the agents decided, was the safest man in Boston.
Jake passed a magazine back to Sam. "This is the boat I was telling you about- page thirteen."
Sam browsed through the pages until he found the picture. "That's what Daniels had for the Broughton Cup. He only got to be in that race because the people who made the boat insisted that…" Jake listened as Sam talked and felt quite pleased with himself that he had read Sam correctly and knew that a discussion about sailing would engage him enough to help take his mind off where he was going.
Jake followed Sam and waited when he stopped at the top of the stairs and paused before following the signs to the courtroom. He ignored the stares as he moved along the seats at the back of the room. In his eagerness to find a seat away from other people Sam realised he had succeeded in hemming himself in at the end. He hoped that not many other people would turn up. Ten minutes later the courthouse was packed.
Sam fiddled with his tie and ran his hands along his pants. Jake felt a rush of sympathy for him. He knew that Sam would be seeing Mael for the first time since his ordeal and he also knew that seeing him escorted by prison guards would do little to make the experience any easier. Sam noticed the flurry of activity on the left hand side of the court and knew Mael's arrival was imminent. He took in a deep breath and felt his chest protest. He rubbed at it absently as he watched Mael being led to his seat. He could only see the back of his head but it was more than enough to bring back flashes of images that Sam had been trying so hard to suppress.
Sam realised he was still rubbing his chest and stopped the action, clenching his hands in his lap instead. His throat felt dry and he wished he'd thought to bring a bottle of water with him. He forced himself to focus on what was being said but his attention was taken by how far away the door seemed to be. He mapped out how he would get out if he needed to and silently cursed the woman further down the row that had her legs stretched right across the aisle.
He didn't look in Mael's direction again and had almost managed to rid his mind of the memories that seeing him had provoked but then Mael spoke. It was only a few words, a few responses to questions from the judge but the sound of it caused Sam to tense, his stomach flip and a shiver to travel from his neck down his spine. He coughed nervously and felt the tightness in his chest again. He took a deep breath but it caught in his throat and he coughed again.
Mael heard it and recognised it. He had heard the sound of Sam coughing many times before and he knew without looking that the man who had escaped and caused him to be abandoned by Incul and Javier was sitting behind him. He waited a few moments before turning around.
Sam caught the movement and despite his better instincts looked across at Mael. It took Mael a few moments to locate Sam in the packed room but then he saw him sitting in the corner. He stared at him for what seemed to Sam like an eternity, before turning back to face the front.
Jake muttered, "Smart ass," under his breath and turned to look at Sam. He had looked pale in the car but now Sam's face was drained of all colour. Sam tried to calm down. Later on he was going to have to sit in front of Mael and so he told himself he should get used to seeing him now. He tried to slow his breathing and use the techniques he'd been taught. He tried to stop his hands from shaking. He tried to stop the wall behind the judge from zooming towards him. He was aware of, and tried to stop all of these things, but he couldn't. He glanced at the door again but it seemed even further away than it had before.
"Get me out of here," Sam whispered to Jake, who only needed to glance at Sam to see the desperation behind the request. Jake stood and grabbed Sam's arm. He propelled him along the aisle. Handbags and legs. That's all Sam could see as he allowed Jake to guide him towards the door. Once outside, Jake quickly thought of the best place to take Sam. He knew that the front of the courthouse would still be swarming with press but he also knew every other exit of the building. Sam got a whiff of bacon as he was led through the kitchen which did nothing to ease his rolling stomach.
Finally Sam felt fresh air hit his face and saw a stretch of blue sky before he doubled over panting for breath. The sound of the lid of a dumpster being pulled open made him look up. He was behind the kitchen. A worker cast bemused looks at Sam and Jake before throwing the trash bags into the dumpster and making his way back into the building. It took a few seconds for the foul smell of the rubbish to reach Sam but when it did he could no longer resist the urge to vomit that he had been fighting ever since Mael had turned and looked at him in the courtroom.
Jake said nothing as Sam stood heaving. Keeping his eyes on Sam he peered into the kitchen and asked for some water. "Thanks," Sam mumbled as he opened the bottle and rinsed away the vile taste in his mouth. Jake sipped at his water as he walked around the area, giving Sam some privacy and satisfying his natural curiosity.
"This place is a health and safety nightmare," he told Sam as he walked back over to him.
"I didn't know the Secret Service had a health and safety unit," Sam replied, pleased that his voice sounded normal.
Jake laughed. "My dad's an inspector of hotels. He tells me the places not to go to. I'll tell you what, Sam, we're not eating here again!" Sam smiled and downed the rest of the water.
"You ready?" Jake asked as he threw their bottles into the trash. On Sam's nod he held the door open and led him back to the courtroom.
"Hi Donna," Laurie said as she answered the third call from her that morning, "I don't know how it's going, I haven't heard from Sam, I haven't been watching the coverage and I don't know if Sam's been called yet."
"Thanks, speak to you later."
Josh had insisted that Donna keep phoning Laurie for news and after the second call Donna had stopped bothering to ask any questions and just waited for Laurie's automatic replies. It was easier than trying to explain to Josh why there was no point in constantly phoning Laurie for news. She walked into Josh's office and over to his desk. "She doesn't know how it's going, she hasn't heard from Sam, she hasn't been watching the coverage and she doesn't know if he's been called yet."
Josh put down the papers he was reading. "That's what she said last time."
"Yes, and the time before that, but I think we're right to keep phoning. She's obviously lying and sooner or later we're going to wear her down."
Josh walked past her and Donna followed him and watched as he poured himself a cup of coffee. "You see, this is exactly the sort of thing that I don't think Leo gets from Margaret- this sort of sassy backchat. It's back-sass is what it is and I think you should be above it," Josh said as he walked past her and back to his office, the effect of his exit ruined slightly by his need to return to collect his coffee cup.
From the witness stand, Sam was able to look directly at Mael. He knew Mael was staring at him but and he focused his attention on the defence attorney instead as the next question was asked. "The medical report details injuries sustained from a number of beatings that took place over the period of your captivity. Who carried out these attacks?"
What a jackass, Sam thought. He wanted to answer that it was Mael and watch the attorney react to that. "It was a man called Incul."
"We need to be clear about this, Mr Seaborn. Do you have any recollection of Mael Gacha committing any acts of violence towards you?"
"Objection, Mr Seaborn's doctor has already testified that he does not have full recall of the events during his captivity."
"I'll rephrase. Where any of the attacks you recall carried out by the defendant?"
The idea that Mael was in some way less culpable than Incul and Javier made Sam want to laugh out loud. "No."
"So, as far as you recollect, the man known as Incul was the one who carried out acts of violence towards you?"
"As far as I recollect, yes." The defence attorney returned to his seat and Sam looked at the prosecution team. He knew in redirect he'd be able to explain exactly what Mael had done. He was pleased to see Larry Clark stand up. He had spent the most time with Larry and had come to respect and trust him. He waited for Larry's first question, knowing it would set him up to reveal Mael's role.
"The court has heard in detail the list of injuries you sustained at the hands of the men holding you. You've stated that one of these men carried out the majority of acts of violence. Can you describe how this man was able to break your wrist and fingers?"
Sam took a sip of water before replying. "He placed a can under my arm and then smashed his gun down onto it."
"I see, so he was...what, holding you against the table as he did this?"
"No. Mael Gacha was holding me in place." Sam paused, and allowed that information to sink in. "I couldn't move. He had me pinned to the table and was holding my arm in place."
Larry paused as he pretended to read his notes. He too knew the value of a well placed pause for the jury's benefit. His was designed to allow them to picture the scene. "So Mael knew what Incul was planning to do?"
Sam knew there was more scope for leading questions in redirect. He also knew he needed to make sure he went where Larry was leading without running the risk of the defence going to recross. "Incul asked me which hand I write with. I told him my right hand. Mael grabbed my right arm and placed it on the table. It was clear to me what was about to happen. I struggled and managed to pull away but Mael pushed me forwards again."
"Did the defendant place your hand on the table again?"
"No."
Larry looked surprised. His eyebrows rose and again he made a show of looking at his notes. "He had you pinned against the table, had managed to restrain you again. Why didn't he place your arm on the table?"
"He couldn't. One of his hands was holding me in place. The other was holding a gun to my head."
Larry loved nothing more than the sound of murmuring in a courtroom born of a revealing piece of testimony. He waited for the sound to disperse. "Is this the only occasion you can recall of Mael's involvement with violence against you?"
Sam took another sip of water. He was amazed at how calm he felt although he had continued to avoid looking in Mael's direction. He knew he was not calm enough to see him again. "On one occasion I was taken to a basement and beaten by Incul. Mael Gacha held my arms behind my back while he beat me." Sam cleared his throat. "He was laughing."
Larry looked genuinely surprised at the added detail which Sam hadn't mentioned before. "The defendant was laughing?"
Sam nodded. "Yes."
Back on track, Larry asked the final question. "When did the beating stop?"
"When Mael couldn't hold me up anymore."
"Thank you, Mr Seaborn. No further questions, your honour."
Sam had returned to Laurie's, showered and dressed before he said a word. She sat on the bed and watched as he buttoned his shirt. Sam caught her eye in the mirror and his hands stilled. "I'll talk to you when I get back." He grabbed his cell and keys and walked out of the room. Over the past few days, Laurie had learnt when to push and when to leave Sam alone. This, she decided, was definitely one of the times that she needed to leave him alone.
Jake drove Sam to the restaurant. Laurie had selected it and made the booking, ensuring that it was a secluded table. Sam got out of the car and glanced at Jake's packed meal and newspaper on the passenger's seat. "I'll smuggle you out a dessert."
Jake peeked into the bag and smiled. "No need, I got myself a snickers bar." Sam smiled and shut the door. He took a deep breath and walked into the restaurant. He waited to be shown to his table and ignored the somersaults that his stomach was performing as he neared the table.
The man seated at the table in the far corner of the room stood as he saw Sam coming. He held out his hand and shook Sam's warmly. "Hello Sam. It's so good to see you." John Delaney waited for Sam to sit and then sat down opposite him.
The sound of the vacuum filled the corridor before Josh reached Sam's door. As far as he knew, Sam didn't have a cleaner and Josh couldn't think who would be at Sam's place this late in the evening. He knocked but whoever was inside couldn't hear over the noise of the machine. He opened the door with his spare key and stood in the doorway. He smiled to himself as he saw Jessica Seaborn vacuuming the living room and singing along to a song on the radio. Josh knew that if he walked in he would startle her, so he went back out and closed the door. When the sound stopped he knocked on it, called out and entered.
"Josh! What a surprise!" she smiled at him but then the smile faded. "You couldn't hear me singing could you?"
"Ah, that's what it was. I thought the vacuum was broke." He smiled as Jessica slapped him playfully on the arm and started to sort through a pile of newspapers.
"I thought that while Sam was away I'd come over and clean the place. I didn't want him coming back to the mess he'd left."
"In Sam's case a mess is having a knife in with the forks."
"I've just finished sorting them," she smiled. "So did you sense that I was here and needed help or did you stop by for something else?"
"As much as I'd love to stay and help you fix this place back to obsessive standards, I've just dropped by for something that I left in the spare-room."
"Help yourself, I'll be in the kitchen if you get the urge to help."
"I won't," Josh assured her. She laughed quietly and left the room. Josh walked towards the spare room and opened the door slowly. He looked at where Judy's equipment had been and found the space empty. He called out to Jessica and she explained that Judy had taken it all before Sam had gone to Boston. Josh cursed silently and walked over to the empty set of drawers that had been behind Judy's belongings. The drawers were all empty and in a last attempt to find the bag, Josh reached into the space between the wall and the cabinet. He groped in the space until he felt a plastic bag. He pulled it out and quickly put it in his backpack.
"Did you find what you were looking for?" Jessica asked when she saw Josh enter the kitchen. She was pulling plates out of a cupboard and cleaning the shelves.
"Yeah thanks," he watched as she wringed the cloth in the bowl and wiped the surface. "Sam will appreciate this when he gets back."
"I doubt he'll even notice but it's making me feel better."
"Yeah," Josh nodded. He knew how helpless Jessica felt. He felt the same. "I better be heading off," Josh said and Jessica smiled and nodded. When she heard the front door shut, she turned back to the bowl, rung out the cloth and wiped over a surface she had already cleaned.