A/N: What happened to all of my reviewers?:( Maybe I should beg again...

Chapter Twenty: Burn Burn Burn

"A floating head?" Hermione asked skeptically.

Harry interrupted Ron. "Malfoy tricked me into raiding my own cabin. He was silly-stringing the inside, and you know how shiny his head is," he explained. "It'll reflect anything."

"Is that why you're so tired today, Harry?" Hermione asked.

"Well, kind of," Harry said. "I stayed up all night cleaning up the mess."

"Why didn't anyone help you?" Hermione asked, shooting Ron a Look.

Ron shrugged. "He said he didn't want our help."

Hermione sighed, and turned back to Harry. "How many times do I have to tell you that reverse psychology doesn't work???"

"But it works in stories!" Harry protested.

"Well, if you haven't noticed yet, this is real life, not some work of fiction!" Hermione huffed.

Harry went to take a swig of his juice, only to find there was none left in his cup. "Could have fooled me," he said.

"... And he didn't even realize it was his cabin!" Draco boasted to a couple of friends he'd picked up at camp.

"That must have been so fun," a boy named Larry said. He had shaggy light brown hair that kept getting in his green, bespectacled eyes. (A/N: Sound familiar?)

"Of course it was," Draco replied. "I wouldn't have done it if I knew Scarhead would like it. Just look at him now! He can barely keep his eyes open."

"You're so smart," Pansy cooed.

Draco glared at her, realizing she was there. "Who invited you to sit here?"

Pansy looked taken aback. "No one –"

"I told you: We're over," Draco said.

"Ouch," Larry said, grinning.

Pansy stood up and went away.

"Wait till you hear what I've got planned for supper kitchen duty!" Draco said, leaning in closer to Larry.

"... Which is why alligators never carry crocodile-skin handbags," a girl at the table next to the golden three's said to another girl. Hermione, Harry, and Ron had begun to eavesdrop because they had run out of things to talk about.

"That wasn't even worth taking notes," Hermione said pityingly.

Ron stood up with his plate. "Here, I'll take your plates back to the kitchen."

"Thanks," Hermione said gratefully, handing Ron her breakfast plate.

Harry shook his head. "No, it's all right."

Ron and Hermione both stared at him. "What did we say about reverse psychology?"

"Oops, sorry. Old habits die hard," Harry apologized sheepishly, handing Ron his plate. Ron went over to dump the plates in the sink.

Hermione sighed. "I doubt there's a patch for this."

"Time to meet with your group leaders!" Kate called.

Everyone stood up and began heading for their group leaders. Hermione and Harry walked over to Amber, and Ron joined them a few seconds later.

Amber smiled at her group. "It's the second last day of camp, so let's make it the funnest!"

A few people weakly smiled back.

"Today we'll be learning about different kinds of wild animals," Amber explained. "I'll teach you all about each one and their different needs and qualities. Then we'll head outside and try to spot those animals. Now..."

Harry and Ron tuned her out again.

"Boooorrriiiiiing," Ron groaned quietly.

Harry's head started to droop. "I can't take this... any longer," he moaned, his eyes starting to close.

Ron nudged Harry in the arm. "I know it's a hard thing to do, but stay awake."

Harry yawned. "Lack of shleep..."

Ron tugged on his arm. "Now you're making... me sleepy..."

A snippet of Amber's lecture was heard. "... Mating season..."

Ron was awake again.

"All right, now that you are all informed, let's go outside," Amber said, walking to the door.

Harry and Ron followed everyone outside.

"That was enlightening," Hermione commented happily.

"Mmm hmm," Harry agreed, half-asleep.

"Now, let's start by looking for that type of fox I mentioned," Amber said once everyone was in a more woodsy part of the grounds.

Harry was nodding off. Ron's voice seemed so distant.

"Oh look, it's Princess Anastasia..." Harry said.

"Shh," Hermione scolded.

"She lives!" he exclaimed. "Ania is a FAKE!"

"Try to keep quiet, children," Amber said in Harry's direction.

"What are you rambling about?" Ron whispered to Harry.

"Die, Ania! DIE!" Harry yelled, falling on the ground. "Hey, come back here!"

"You scared the fox away!" someone said.

Amber stomped up to Harry. "Is there a problem?"

"Yes," Harry said.

"No," Hermione and Ron said.

Amber left.

Hermione started snapping her fingers in Harry's face. "Wake up!"

Harry's eyes went wide. "All right! I'm awake!"

Hermione snapped her fingers in his face a few more times before stopping.

This pattern continued throughout the day. Harry would slip into the first couple stages of sleep and start hallucinating, and Hermione would snap her fingers in his face to wake him up. By the time it was supper, Hermione's middle finger and thumb were red and blistered, and Harry was still half-asleep.

"I don't think I can hold onto the cutlery," Hermione, who was bandaging her fingers, complained to Ron.

"Use your other hand," Ron suggested.

Hermione glanced at the clock on the wall. "When is supper going to be ready, anyway? We should have been eating 10 minutes ago..."

Things were getting a bit chaotic in the kitchen. "Harry!" yelled the girl who had scolded Harry before. "Where's that other bowl of salad?"

"I'm still making it!" Harry hollered back. He dumped the rest of the tomato slices in. "Ready!"

As he ran to give the bowl to the girl, a wet dishcloth flew out in front of him. Accidentally stepping on it, he fell down hard and spilled the salad everywhere.

Draco ran up to him and whipped the dishcloth out from under him. "You stepped on my clean rag!"

"Well, it made me fall!" Harry shot back.

Looking at the floor, Draco said, "And you dumped the food everywhere!"

"Well, if you hadn't thrown your rag out in front of me-!"

"You've ruined half the supper now!"

"Shut up and help me clean all of this-"

"Why don't you shut up and clean-"?

"Stop yelling at me!"

"Stop yelling at me!" Draco screamed, and started whipping Harry with the dishcloth.

Curling up into a ball, Harry grabbed a random piece of the ruined salad. Crying out in pain, he whipped it at Draco.

Draco screamed as the salad dressing burned into his eyes. He snatched up the bowl and shoved it onto Harry's head.

"Get this off of me!" Harry yelled. Unable to see, he managed to grab hold of the dishcloth, and the two idiots began to play tug-of-war.

The other kitchen-workers had abandoned their projects to watch the fight.

"Get your peanuts!" one of them joked, waving a bag of peanuts around.

Draco let go of the cloth. It flew onto the stove and burst into flames.

Harry pulled the bowl off of his head and grabbed a fire extinguisher. "Look what you've done!" he scolded, trying to figure out how to make the foam spray out.

"Here, let me do it!" Draco spat. Grabbing the extinguisher away, he was able to make the foam come out. Unfortunately, he had it pointed the wrong way and it sprayed itself onto him.

"WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?" Mitch boomed as he ran into the kitchen. The kitchen-workers, minus our two idiots, were laughing. If Mitch hadn't been so furious, you'd have been too. The top of the stove was ablaze, salad was strewn all over the floor, Draco was covered in white goop, and Harry had fallen asleep.

Draco simply let out a long scream.

Mitch flicked his wand at the stove and it stopped burning. With another flick, the foam vanished off of Draco.

"No one knows why the kitchen is a mess?" Mitch asked angrily.

Draco pointed at Harry. "It's all his fault!"

Mitch looked at Harry's sleeping form, and shook him awake. "Draco here says this is all your fault."

Harry whipped his head around to glare at Draco. "No it wasn't!" he protested.

Mitch gave the rest of the workers a stern look. "Serve the rest of the food. You two-" he fixed his stare onto Harry and Draco, "Clean all of this up. Manually!"

Draco screamed again.

"Screaming like a baby won't help you," Mitch snapped.

"Ha ha," Harry taunted under his breath.

Mitch left the kitchen. Once he was out of sight, Draco looked at Harry. "Salad-face," he sneered.

Harry tried to think of something he could call Draco. "Uh... white goop... guy...?"

"Great comeback," Draco said sarcastically.

"Why don't you shove your socks down your throat?" Harry replied.

"Watch it, Potter," Draco warned, dramatically leaving the kitchen.

A/N: Okay this is officially the "Very long but not very funny" chapter. I keep trying to wrap up the story, but keep getting distracted and writing more. Oh well. Stay tuned.