After the upheaval that came with the Jackie/Eric kiss, and the beginning of their relationship, I once again found solace in the Madison apartment and college. Having that apartment had given me a lot of independence and escape from the fact that my life seemed to keep getting torn all up and haphazardly tossed back together like the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. Not to mention the fact that, for a little while anyway, it gave me an escape from Hyde and the last kiss we'd shared. After about a month had gone by and I hadn't gone back home to Point Place, everyone must have started to worry about me or something, cause after going through a particularly brutal day of school and heading back to the apartment who did I see standing at my door but an anxious looking Steven Hyde.
Once the pleasantries were out of the way, he started to grill me about why I'd stayed away from home for so long; that everyone was really getting concerned. Jackie and Eric felt the worst though, since they knew that their actions were what caused this whole mess. Especially since I took a bus and headed directly back to Madison after all that went down and hadn't been seen since. To boil it down, they felt guilty. Hyde admitted as much to me, and told me that he had a LONG discussion with them about their little public display as soon as everyone got home. He also informed me that everyone missed me terribly, but that they thought I needed my space so they didn't come to check up on me sooner. Apparently after a month or so, Jackie started whining to Eric about how much she missed me and our girl talk, and tried to send him after me. Eric was able to fend her off for a few days though, but her whining quickly got the best of him. Unfortunately, he didn't feel like the best nominee for the task of bringing me home after everything that had happened, so he coaxed Hyde into doing it for him.
However, Hyde confessed to me that for once doing Eric's dirty work didn't really bother him. I couldn't help but see that that was because he was also getting pretty concerned. Maybe he felt a little guilty for his part in the whole mess as well, though I doubt I'll ever know for sure, as he's always been a pretty secretive guy. In fact, I think overall he's opened up to me more than he has with almost anyone else. I actually was rather proud of that, as I was one of the priveleged few who got to see the softer side of Steven Hyde, the part of himself that he hid behind zen, that he kept hidden from the rest of the world. Even if the last time we saw each other had ended badly, nothing could break that bond.
Looking back on it now, I think in that single moment, we both decided to forget the kiss and everything revolving around it. Our bond was too strong to let something like that come between us, and I still cared for him more than even I had realized, even if I wasn't ready to acknowledge it, and I'd missed him terribly. Hyde stayed with me that weekend, and we caught up on everything that happened with each other in the past month. By the time he left that Sunday evening, we'd pretty just settled into an easy, cozy, close friendship, though I knew something was missing. I was just unwilling and even a little afraid to admit what it was, even to myself. And if his actions were any indication, he felt it too. However, the situation between us was so complicated that I felt powerless to own up to my own feelings, as much as that secret corner of my mind would've loved to.
Thus, I took comfort in the relationship we did have. One where we shared most of our hopes and dreams with each other, and leaned on each other as Eric and Jackie's relationship continued to progress. After a couple more weeks by myself up in Madison, and one more visit from Hyde, I slowly started to go home again every so often. It was difficult at first, but eventually I started to rebuild my friendships with both Jackie and Eric and things started to get back to normal. Hyde still continued to come visit me in Madison on the off weekends that I didn't go home; sometimes, he'd just come with general news from home like his latest burn on Kelso, Fez and his latest candy escapades, or how Jackie had succeeded in 'whipping Forman like the family pig,' as he called it; other times, he'd help with my school work or would proofread my latest column for the school paper, but whatever it was, it only succeeded in bringing us closer.
It continued like this for months. The summer before my second year of college, Eric got himself an apartment near me in Madison and started taking investment banking, and Jackie visited him often. Sometimes, she'd bring Hyde up with her and all four of us would hang out for the weekend before they went home, sometimes she'd come up by herself. There was also the rare times the whole gang would come to visit, though it was difficult to get the whole gang together these days as Kelso was busy with police academy, and Fez had gotten a new girlfriend and was working full time at the DMV while he thought about what he wanted to do now that high school was over.
Once or twice a month, Eric and I would also go home to Point Place to visit with our friends and family, and the school year flew by. The summer passed just as quickly, as it was rather uneventful, and the new school year was upon us. Jackie had applied to UW in the spring and had gotten accepted into their fashion program, so she was getting ready to move in with Eric. Hyde was still busy working as a chef at the Holiday Hotel; he'd gotten really enthusiastic about the whole cooking thing and was seriously looking into culinary schools in Madison. He was planning on applying to a few of them either for the winter semester or the following year. Fez had been dumped by his girlfriend that summer, which was really tearing him up. He decided that college might take his mind off things, so he enrolled at a few classes at UW as well, and moved into the co-ed dorms. After that, it didn't take him long to get over his broken heart, I'll tell you that much. We didn't see him much either, as he spent a lot of his free time at impromptu keg parties with the other part time students with time on their hands.
November/December 1979
Before we knew it, the winter of 1979/1980 was upon us. As tired, and annoyed with the cold as we were at this point, along with the realization that we hadn't been together as a group in several months, we decided that we deserved a break. Our parents agreed, and helped us fund a group trip to anywhere we chose to go. Red was a bit of a stick in the mud about it at first, but Mrs. Forman softened him up in a hurry. We all knew that he was grudgingly proud of Eric for doing so well at college anyway, but that he'd never come out and admit it. Funding this trip was his way of showing how pleased he really was. We all decided we wanted to get as far from the winter and school woes as possible, even if it was only for a little while; the best place to do that? Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.
So the day after Christmas, we got all our stuff together and to the airport we went. The flight went relatively smoothly, though we did experience a bit of turbulence for the first hour or so. Was hilarious seeing Kelso's reaction to it too...he literally squirmed in his seat and started crying and screaming about how we were all gonna die. I was sitting on the window seat with Hyde beside me across the aisle from Kelso and Fez, and needless to say it didn't take Hyde long to look at him, start snickering, and frog him a good one in the arm. Eric, who was sitting behind Hyde started cracking up and gave Hyde a high five, while Jackie was admiring herself in a mirror. Fez was too caught up in 'protecting' his precious candy from the baby in the seat behind him to notice.
I won't bore you with all the little details of the trip, but the first few days were filled with lighthearted fun at the beach by day, and little group drinking parties by night. We got three rooms, and paired off like this: Jackie and I, Hyde and Eric, Fez and Kelso. Jackie would spend a lot of time in Eric's room though, and Fez and Kelso were always out trying to impress the many women at the resort, leaving me and Hyde with a lot of free time together. Sometimes, we'd tag after Fez and Kelso and get many laughs from seeing them strike out, time and time again; others, we'd just share a beer, form a mini circle in me and Jackie's room and just hang out.
Every once in a while though, there were those awkward silences when neither of us could think of what to say so we sat just quietly staring at each other. And those times were the hardest; the times when I wanted so much to throw caution to the wind, and bring up the one thing that was between us, that neither of us had the words, or the nerve to face. Luckily, those moments never lasted for long, but that few minutes always felt like an eternity. The both of us continued to pass them off, leaving our friendship intact, as we still were not ready to examine these feelings too closely.
No sooner did the trip begin, that we found it almost over. We decided to spend our last night there together as a group frolicking on the beach. Still poor Kelso and Fez hadn't had any luck getting the attention of all the bottled blonde skanks, and the trip was nearly over. Thus, they were falling all over themselves trying to impress a group of girls on the beach so they could get some last minute 'action', as Kelso liked to call it. Maybe the fact that it was our last night there was a good charm or something as within a matter of minutes, they'd attracted the attention of a set of pretty brunette twins and took off to spend the evening with them, rationalizing that we'd get to spend the whole day together on the way home tomorrow. They had our blessing...better that than listening to them whine all night that we'd destroyed the 'mood'.
Eric and Jackie walked off to enjoy a little more carefree time together before returning to Madison and the responsibilities that waited for them there. Before long, they started splashing and teasing each other in the water like couples do. This left just me and Hyde, the warm ocean water, and a cool moonlit night. We watched Jackie and Eric for a few minutes, then turned and looked at each other. Suddenly Hyde dove underwater as I continued to stand there, wondering what he was planning as I looked back to Eric and Jackie. Their play was long over and they were deeply involved in a make out session, oblivious to the scene around them. Caught between staring at them and trying to break away, I failed to realize that Hyde had managed to swim up behind me under water and yank on my foot, pulling me underneath the water. I somehow managed to break out of his hold and swim to the surface, coughing and spluttering the whole time. It didn't take me long to recover, and to start plotting my revenge, so when he finally came up for air, I was ready. I shoved the water with all my might and sent a huge tidal wave his way. It was so high in fact that it went over his head and he managed to look even more like a drowned rat, if that was possible. Our water war had begun...
We continued our 'fight' until we both started getting really tired; our efforts at revenge were haphazard at best, and it had turned more into a playful teasing than anything else. What happened next I think was a shocker to the both of us, though in retrospect I wonder why I was so surprised by it all. I don't know who started it, or how it got as serious as it did, but one minute we were frolicking in the waves, and the next we were kissing frantically, as though neither of us could have enough of the other. But just as quickly as it started, I'd pulled away and swung my hand toward his cheek to smack him yet again. However, something was different this time. I was still angry, yes...but not at him. This time I was angry with myself for not having the nerve to face my own feelings. The slap was just something I was familiar with, something I did without actually even thinking about it. Before my hand could connect with his cheek though, he once again saw the slap coming and rather than grabbing my wrist like he had the last time, he just took a step back and out of out my reach. Now having nothing to connect with, the force of my own swing caused me to lose my balance and fall face first into the water, but not before I could see the look of angry thwarted passion all over his face. By the time I managed to break the surface of the water and call after him, he'd already turned and stalked away. I'd really blown it this time...
Once the pleasantries were out of the way, he started to grill me about why I'd stayed away from home for so long; that everyone was really getting concerned. Jackie and Eric felt the worst though, since they knew that their actions were what caused this whole mess. Especially since I took a bus and headed directly back to Madison after all that went down and hadn't been seen since. To boil it down, they felt guilty. Hyde admitted as much to me, and told me that he had a LONG discussion with them about their little public display as soon as everyone got home. He also informed me that everyone missed me terribly, but that they thought I needed my space so they didn't come to check up on me sooner. Apparently after a month or so, Jackie started whining to Eric about how much she missed me and our girl talk, and tried to send him after me. Eric was able to fend her off for a few days though, but her whining quickly got the best of him. Unfortunately, he didn't feel like the best nominee for the task of bringing me home after everything that had happened, so he coaxed Hyde into doing it for him.
However, Hyde confessed to me that for once doing Eric's dirty work didn't really bother him. I couldn't help but see that that was because he was also getting pretty concerned. Maybe he felt a little guilty for his part in the whole mess as well, though I doubt I'll ever know for sure, as he's always been a pretty secretive guy. In fact, I think overall he's opened up to me more than he has with almost anyone else. I actually was rather proud of that, as I was one of the priveleged few who got to see the softer side of Steven Hyde, the part of himself that he hid behind zen, that he kept hidden from the rest of the world. Even if the last time we saw each other had ended badly, nothing could break that bond.
Looking back on it now, I think in that single moment, we both decided to forget the kiss and everything revolving around it. Our bond was too strong to let something like that come between us, and I still cared for him more than even I had realized, even if I wasn't ready to acknowledge it, and I'd missed him terribly. Hyde stayed with me that weekend, and we caught up on everything that happened with each other in the past month. By the time he left that Sunday evening, we'd pretty just settled into an easy, cozy, close friendship, though I knew something was missing. I was just unwilling and even a little afraid to admit what it was, even to myself. And if his actions were any indication, he felt it too. However, the situation between us was so complicated that I felt powerless to own up to my own feelings, as much as that secret corner of my mind would've loved to.
Thus, I took comfort in the relationship we did have. One where we shared most of our hopes and dreams with each other, and leaned on each other as Eric and Jackie's relationship continued to progress. After a couple more weeks by myself up in Madison, and one more visit from Hyde, I slowly started to go home again every so often. It was difficult at first, but eventually I started to rebuild my friendships with both Jackie and Eric and things started to get back to normal. Hyde still continued to come visit me in Madison on the off weekends that I didn't go home; sometimes, he'd just come with general news from home like his latest burn on Kelso, Fez and his latest candy escapades, or how Jackie had succeeded in 'whipping Forman like the family pig,' as he called it; other times, he'd help with my school work or would proofread my latest column for the school paper, but whatever it was, it only succeeded in bringing us closer.
It continued like this for months. The summer before my second year of college, Eric got himself an apartment near me in Madison and started taking investment banking, and Jackie visited him often. Sometimes, she'd bring Hyde up with her and all four of us would hang out for the weekend before they went home, sometimes she'd come up by herself. There was also the rare times the whole gang would come to visit, though it was difficult to get the whole gang together these days as Kelso was busy with police academy, and Fez had gotten a new girlfriend and was working full time at the DMV while he thought about what he wanted to do now that high school was over.
Once or twice a month, Eric and I would also go home to Point Place to visit with our friends and family, and the school year flew by. The summer passed just as quickly, as it was rather uneventful, and the new school year was upon us. Jackie had applied to UW in the spring and had gotten accepted into their fashion program, so she was getting ready to move in with Eric. Hyde was still busy working as a chef at the Holiday Hotel; he'd gotten really enthusiastic about the whole cooking thing and was seriously looking into culinary schools in Madison. He was planning on applying to a few of them either for the winter semester or the following year. Fez had been dumped by his girlfriend that summer, which was really tearing him up. He decided that college might take his mind off things, so he enrolled at a few classes at UW as well, and moved into the co-ed dorms. After that, it didn't take him long to get over his broken heart, I'll tell you that much. We didn't see him much either, as he spent a lot of his free time at impromptu keg parties with the other part time students with time on their hands.
November/December 1979
Before we knew it, the winter of 1979/1980 was upon us. As tired, and annoyed with the cold as we were at this point, along with the realization that we hadn't been together as a group in several months, we decided that we deserved a break. Our parents agreed, and helped us fund a group trip to anywhere we chose to go. Red was a bit of a stick in the mud about it at first, but Mrs. Forman softened him up in a hurry. We all knew that he was grudgingly proud of Eric for doing so well at college anyway, but that he'd never come out and admit it. Funding this trip was his way of showing how pleased he really was. We all decided we wanted to get as far from the winter and school woes as possible, even if it was only for a little while; the best place to do that? Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.
So the day after Christmas, we got all our stuff together and to the airport we went. The flight went relatively smoothly, though we did experience a bit of turbulence for the first hour or so. Was hilarious seeing Kelso's reaction to it too...he literally squirmed in his seat and started crying and screaming about how we were all gonna die. I was sitting on the window seat with Hyde beside me across the aisle from Kelso and Fez, and needless to say it didn't take Hyde long to look at him, start snickering, and frog him a good one in the arm. Eric, who was sitting behind Hyde started cracking up and gave Hyde a high five, while Jackie was admiring herself in a mirror. Fez was too caught up in 'protecting' his precious candy from the baby in the seat behind him to notice.
I won't bore you with all the little details of the trip, but the first few days were filled with lighthearted fun at the beach by day, and little group drinking parties by night. We got three rooms, and paired off like this: Jackie and I, Hyde and Eric, Fez and Kelso. Jackie would spend a lot of time in Eric's room though, and Fez and Kelso were always out trying to impress the many women at the resort, leaving me and Hyde with a lot of free time together. Sometimes, we'd tag after Fez and Kelso and get many laughs from seeing them strike out, time and time again; others, we'd just share a beer, form a mini circle in me and Jackie's room and just hang out.
Every once in a while though, there were those awkward silences when neither of us could think of what to say so we sat just quietly staring at each other. And those times were the hardest; the times when I wanted so much to throw caution to the wind, and bring up the one thing that was between us, that neither of us had the words, or the nerve to face. Luckily, those moments never lasted for long, but that few minutes always felt like an eternity. The both of us continued to pass them off, leaving our friendship intact, as we still were not ready to examine these feelings too closely.
No sooner did the trip begin, that we found it almost over. We decided to spend our last night there together as a group frolicking on the beach. Still poor Kelso and Fez hadn't had any luck getting the attention of all the bottled blonde skanks, and the trip was nearly over. Thus, they were falling all over themselves trying to impress a group of girls on the beach so they could get some last minute 'action', as Kelso liked to call it. Maybe the fact that it was our last night there was a good charm or something as within a matter of minutes, they'd attracted the attention of a set of pretty brunette twins and took off to spend the evening with them, rationalizing that we'd get to spend the whole day together on the way home tomorrow. They had our blessing...better that than listening to them whine all night that we'd destroyed the 'mood'.
Eric and Jackie walked off to enjoy a little more carefree time together before returning to Madison and the responsibilities that waited for them there. Before long, they started splashing and teasing each other in the water like couples do. This left just me and Hyde, the warm ocean water, and a cool moonlit night. We watched Jackie and Eric for a few minutes, then turned and looked at each other. Suddenly Hyde dove underwater as I continued to stand there, wondering what he was planning as I looked back to Eric and Jackie. Their play was long over and they were deeply involved in a make out session, oblivious to the scene around them. Caught between staring at them and trying to break away, I failed to realize that Hyde had managed to swim up behind me under water and yank on my foot, pulling me underneath the water. I somehow managed to break out of his hold and swim to the surface, coughing and spluttering the whole time. It didn't take me long to recover, and to start plotting my revenge, so when he finally came up for air, I was ready. I shoved the water with all my might and sent a huge tidal wave his way. It was so high in fact that it went over his head and he managed to look even more like a drowned rat, if that was possible. Our water war had begun...
We continued our 'fight' until we both started getting really tired; our efforts at revenge were haphazard at best, and it had turned more into a playful teasing than anything else. What happened next I think was a shocker to the both of us, though in retrospect I wonder why I was so surprised by it all. I don't know who started it, or how it got as serious as it did, but one minute we were frolicking in the waves, and the next we were kissing frantically, as though neither of us could have enough of the other. But just as quickly as it started, I'd pulled away and swung my hand toward his cheek to smack him yet again. However, something was different this time. I was still angry, yes...but not at him. This time I was angry with myself for not having the nerve to face my own feelings. The slap was just something I was familiar with, something I did without actually even thinking about it. Before my hand could connect with his cheek though, he once again saw the slap coming and rather than grabbing my wrist like he had the last time, he just took a step back and out of out my reach. Now having nothing to connect with, the force of my own swing caused me to lose my balance and fall face first into the water, but not before I could see the look of angry thwarted passion all over his face. By the time I managed to break the surface of the water and call after him, he'd already turned and stalked away. I'd really blown it this time...