Disclaimer: The setting is SW, all hail the mighty George Lucas!! The song is "The Last Thing She Said" and it's by Ryan Tyler.
Rating: PG
Summary: Mara and Luke are married, but it's not all bliss. They have a fight one morning and Mara storms off, their actions have repercussions neither one foresaw…
--------------------------------------------Words Miscommunicate
When she opened up her eyes, she was blinded by the lights
Everything was flashing red and blue.
Mara cracked her clouded jade green eyes open, and a tremor racked her body. A keening cry slipped from her lips as the pain stabbed into her, trying to turn her inside out. Her eyes slowly focused on the world around her; it was flooded with red and blue lights. Her head felt like it was floating and the rest of her body was filled with burning agony that wouldn't rest. She could feel warm blood trickle down her face, the sticky liquid matting in her eyelashes. She groaned when she closed her eyes again.
Sweet Force, she thought despairingly. What have I done?
She heard, "Do you know were you are?" as they pulled her from her car
She saw the helicopter and she knew, oh, it must be really bad.
"Ma'am!" a uniformed Twi'lek yelled, bending over to look Mara in the face. "What's your name? Do you know where you are?!"
"I-I…" Mara tried to speak, her eyes slitting open, seeing through her matted lashes a closed shuttle, obviously built for speed and her heart burned with regret. "…Mara Skywalker." She whispered, closing her eyes. Even though she hadn't scanned herself with the Force, she knew it was bad, really bad.
The hands that were carefully peeling apart the crumpled speeder from around her body froze for a split second. Harsh gasps of surprise escaped her rescuers, and then they hurried even more, knowing that they couldn't let anything happen to her. Her family would tear them apart if they could've saved her and didn't.
Cool hands wrapped around her and pulled her from the wreckage, pain flying through Mara until she could hardly focus enough to stay conscious, never mind touching the Force.
The Force obviously wanted her frozen with pain, because the only thing she could think about was Luke…
And as they lifted off the ground,
The only thing that she could think about,
Was the last thing she said to her husband that morning,
As the ship took off, Mara's mind tormented her with images, sounds and emotions. She knew that when someone is in extreme pain, all that the person can think of is the pain they are experiencing until it is finally too much and they black out. Maybe with Force users, it was different, her mind thought abstractly. It would definitely explain why she was still fairly lucid.
It also explained why she kept watching a replay of the terrible morning in her head like it was some third-rate, horror-holofilm that would only be played after midnight.
An' the look on his face when she slammed the door.
And the way she drove off, without one ounce of regret.
And knowing "I love you" was not the last thing she said.
Mara might have been crying beforehand, but she had no recollection of it. Her eyes, which had been cloudy with misery, filled with tears, making them swim with regret. Every nuance of her last conversation with Luke filled her sense, overshadowing even the physical pain she was in from the accident. She tried to tell herself that it was all just a figment of her very active imagination; that it was all a bad dream; that it wasn't real; that it hadn't happened…
…And then she would remember the hurt look in her husband's eyes, the slight film of tears turning the pale blue into intense cobalt. She then would remember the look that had been on Luke's face when she had finished yelling at him. And finally, She would remember the silence that had hung in the air when she slammed the door shut behind her. And her heart would break.
Mara's face was awash with blood and tears. A nurse cursed as he tried to mop up the blood and placed several bactapatches around the shard of metal imbedded over Mara's right eye. The bleeding wouldn't stop.
The nurse spoke a few terse words to the pilot and she nodded, reaching for the comunit. They would need at least seven pints of blood on hand when they reached the medward or their patient wouldn't live.
She tried to stay awake long enough to see his face,
Wishin' she could take the whole day back.
Mara was pulled from the shuttle with a needle slid into a vein in her arm, and they began pumping blood into her immediately. A pleasant breeze broke over her heated skin as she was rushed off to an open operating room. As they pushed her along in a repulsorbed, Mara grew frightened.
She had been injured before, several times it had even been life threatening. Every time she had been able to pull through it, and never once had she felt so Force forsaken dizzy. Fear was an emotion that, while it was not alien, was most definitely something she had little experience with. Mara bit down on her lip as hard as she could, trying to ease the pain that was exploding through her head. She didn't even react when she bit through her lip.
She wished so much that she could just rewind time, if for no other reason then to erase the memories that filled her mind. Where was Luke? Her fevered gaze scanned every face she passed, trying to get just a glimpse him. Just to see his messy hair that she loved to run her hands through. Just to see his eyes that could fill with laughter or show the pain of past mistakes. Just to see his lips that would often as not quirk up in a smile before he kissed her gently. Just to see Him.
She kept asking where he is, and "Am I gonna live?"
While the voices in the room faded fast.
Before she drifted off, they tried to calm her down.
The rooms slid in and out of focus, and the voices grew muted. Mara thrashed around, oblivious to the arms that were trying to hold her down and unmindful of the restraints that they tried to impose on her. She was babbling, terrified.
"Where is he? Where is Skywalker?? Luke!! Will I live?? Where is he? I need him!! Luke, where are you??"
The surgeons all looked at each other, swallowing hard. Luke had arrived almost exactly when Mara had brought in. He had glimpsed her through a thick transperasteel wall as they had wheeled her off into the operation room. He had pounded on see-through barrier and yelled for her. His sister had been close on his heels and she tried to peel him off of the view port.
Luke hadn't really left. His eyes were dark with agony as he had allowed himself to be dragged away. Pain had been intermingled with worry as he touched her mind with the Force and found she didn't recognize him. He was almost reeling from the slamming her shields had given him. He fingered his lightsaber with one hand while he clenched his mechanical one over and over.
The surgeons had the eerie feeling that if they messed up and Mara…died, then Luke would kill them.
They were right.
But on and on, all she talked about,
Was the last thing she said to her husband that morning,
An' the look on his face when she slammed the door.
And the way she drove off, without one ounce of regret.
And knowing "I love you" was not the last thing she said.
The surgeons worked mechanically, removing the metal shards from her body, cauterizing the burst blood vessels and trying to make her whole again. They didn't let themselves think or react.
Mara was speaking with the Force.
She was filling their minds with repeats of the morning. Of the way she had sneered "All I am is something you can't tame, and you can't stand me for it!" Of the way she had cut off his every word. Of the way she had snarled the words "I hate you!" at him. Of the looks of desolation and soul bending agony that had flitted across his face as each barb sunk deeper and deeper in his heart.
Her mouth was sealed shut, or else she would've screamed out her rending sense of loss. She had torn Luke's heart to pieces. Even if she survived, she had lost him…
Utter self-loathing and anguish filled her heart and mind.
He was waitin' in the hall, starin' at the wall,
When he finally saw the doctor walk his way.
Luke wasn't sitting in the waiting room when the surgeon's finally left. He was leaning against a wall, staring blankly ahead at the wall, his face covered with tear streaks. His blonde hair was messed up and his skin was pale. He was breathing shallowly, and any attempt to speak with him was repulsed. His sister hadn't wanted to leave but her husband had pulled her away, saying that her children needed her. Luke had told her to go ahead.
The surgeons hid in the supply room and drew straws to see who would have to speak to the famed Jedi Master. Someone whispered that he probably already knew how she was, but the others shushed him and he drew the long one.
Taking a deep breath, the Mon Calamari adjusted his uniform before leaving. Rolling one of his eyes to look at his coworkers, he left the room apprehensively.
Luke looked up when he felt the doctor approach and hurriedly straightened up. "Yes?" he asked anxiously, wanting news of his wife more then anything he had ever wanted in his life. His mind was still slightly bruised from his constant attempts to read Mara with the Force and the constant attacks she met him with.
He knew that it was a reflex reaction to keep people from hurting her while she was down.
…It still hurt though
Oh, he was scared to death, just holding his breath,
Right up until he heard the doctor say: "She'll be okay,
"And right now she needs her rest, but she wanted me to tell you she's sorry"
Luke was terrified. Not even when he had thought she would die in the underground tunnels had he been so afraid for her. He watched as the doctor shifted his feet uneasily. He wasn't breathing, too worried to be bothered by something as nonessential as oxygen. The doctor's brown eyes looked at him, and then swiveled away.
"Doctor, please…" Luke pleaded desperately.
The doctor took a fortifying breath and then looked Luke straight in the eyes. "Master Skywalker, she'll be okay."
A torrent of relief swept through Luke so strongly he stumbled and almost collapsed. The doctor caught him, alarmed. Wasn't Master Skywalker pleased with the news…?
Luke shook his head and waved the doctor back as he picked himself up. "Can I see her, now?" Luke asked hopefully.
The doctor shook his head negatively. "I'm sorry sir, but right now she needs her rest, and she needs undisturbed rest. If the Force wills it, she'll be out of the bacta in a few days, you can see her then."
Luke sighed, impatient and resigned. "Are you sure?"
"I'm positive," the doctor softened. "Master Skywalker, your wife asked me to tell you she's sorry."
A second wave of relief tore through Luke and his tired lips rose in a terrific grin.
"And 'I love you' was the last thing she said."
"Oh yes, and the last words she said before she succumbed to the sedatives were 'Luke, I love you'. I hope you have a good day, Master Skywalker." The doctor said formally, shaking Luke's hand before he turned and scurried off with a nurse at his shoulder reading him something off of a datapad.
Luke turned to the clear wall, fixing his eyes on the hall that Mara's room was down. Tears of happiness filled his eyes and he started to cry again. His voice was broken but his words were clear.
"I love you too, Mara…"