A/R* FrogFroggy5: Yes, I will do translations from now on.Oops.I actually
meant to do that last chappie, but I forgot! ^__^ my bad.lol so from now
on, translations will be at the bottom, but for the last chapter, I will
put the translations up at the top, ok? Ok.thanks for reviewing! I am happy
you liked it! ^__^
Translations for last chapter:
Otoosan- Father Kyoodai- Sibling (sister in this case) "Oishii sushi Otoosan! Arigatoo Gozaimasu!" Tasty sushi father! Thank you! -chan -meaning, small or it is also used as a loving term.
I think that takes care of everything! So, please READ AND REVIEW!
A/N* WOW! I feel loved! Only two days since I put the first chapter up and I already have 3 reviews! YAY! sorry.anyway, here's the next chapter for you!
***
Title: Never Ending Sadness
Author: Halfdemon-gurl15
Manga: Kodocha: Sana's Stage
Author: Miho Obana
Disclaimer: I do not own Kodocha, or any of the characters with in it.
Chapter 2: Tangled Thoughts of Nothing
"Akito.Akito! I'm alive.Akito.I Love you, Akito.don't forget me.I'm alive.Akito."
***
I heard a distant cry. I opened my eyes to see I was in a small room. The walls were covered with odd pink and yellow flowered wall paper, and there was only one small window that shed no light, for the curtains were drawn. I sat up, but someone pushed me back down. It was Otoosan, and I realized that I was still laying on the hospital bed. The heart monitor still beating steadily beside me.
I heard him say something, but I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts to make out what it was.
'Oh Sana, I love you dearly, I shall never love anyone again, as long as I live. But I will be with you soon, I can't live with out you. I Won't live without you, you're smile, you're hug, the hug that gave me the strength to carry on, even when it felt like I was just going to crumble, to fall into a billion pieces. I will be with you soon my love.'
In the back of my mind I heard Otoosan say at some point that I could go home today. I nodded pointlessly and turned over to let sleep claim me, hoping that my dreams would be of Sana's sweet and gentle face, her smile her warmth, I just had to experience it again. But I can never truly be with her again, not even in my dreams. The only way I can be with her once again, the only way is to die.
***
After waking up the next morning in my own bed, I tried desperately to remember what I had dreamed, but all I could remember was Sana, she was trying to tell me something, I just know it.
"Akito, get ready!" I heard Otoosan yell up to me. I got out of bed and walked over to my closet. My feet felt like they were made of lead as I walked. I got my only black suit out of the closet and laid it on my bed.
I took an ice cold shower before putting the charcoal black suit. The material felt stiff against my bare skin. I walked downstairs, Otoosan and Natsumi waiting, both wore depressed expressions on their countenances, both wearing black. My father a suit, Natsumi a dress. Otoosan looked at me expectantly as if to ask if I was ready to go. I nodded and he turned and went out the door. Me and Natsumi followed behind.
It was a dreary day, no sunlight was shining through the clouds, to say that the weather was mirroring my emotions would be an understatement, I felt worse. No amount of words or pain could express my grief on this day, the day of my one and only, Sana's funeral.
I don't remember the service, all I remember is that, there was no body, they never found her body in the wreckage, the flames from the explosion must have been so hot that it disintegrated her bones. I remember crying for the second time in the part of my life I still remember. It's all blank after that.
***
For what seemed like the millionth time I awoke to no light. I got up out of bed and walked slowly down the hallway to the bathroom. I felt like I was still asleep, like it was all a dream.
I remember turning on the bathtub faucet on, plugging up the hole, so that no water could escape. I went back to my room and got the dinosaur that Sana had given to me, it still wearing the very stylish scarf around it's neck. I knew that if Sana saw the dinosaur right now, she would start to laugh, I loved it when she laughed. It made all my troubles just float away, up into the clouds like they were never there.
I went back into the bathroom and put the small figurine on the sink. The bathtub was almost full now as I reached into the bottom cabinet, pulling out Otoosan's razor. I slit my lifeless wrist with my good hand and watched the crimson drip onto the floor with pure satisfaction. I welcomed the pain, I loved the pain, but not as much as I love Sana.
I felt warm water on my cold toes as the overflowing water came up and over the ceramic tub. Once again I took the razor in my left hand and sliced my right cheek, I felt the warm blood slowly stream down my face. I found scissors in the first aid kit and stabbed them right through my shoulder, I took the scissors out and blood gushed from the new wound. I felt light headed and I smiled to myself.
The pain, it was nothing compared to the pain of losing Sana. No amount of pain or torture could ever be worse than the whole in my chest, the black hole that used to be my heart.
I walked over to the tub and submerged my head in the hot steamy water. I felt my face tingle as forks poked and stabbed my face as the hot water scalded my cheeks. I came up from the water, my face the color of a beat. I opened my eyes to see the water had turned slightly red. I hung over the tub, trying to stay conscious as I let the blood from my shoulder turn the water crimson.
"More." I said to myself. I had planned this out, I would make sure that my death was slow and painful, to repent for everything I had done to everyone else. I knew it wasn't enough, it never would, or could be enough to pay back for everything I did wrong, how many lives I've ruined.
But as I went to slice another part of my body, I heard a voice inside my head, it sounded so familiar.
"Sana?" I heard her voice, but I couldn't make out what she was trying to say to me. She was to far away. "SANA! If you hear me, I'm Listening!" I yelled.
"I love you Akito, that's why I gave birth to you." the voice said to me. I could feel Sana's hands on my head, her fingers slowly going through my messy hair. I felt her presence as my mind slowly drifted back to that park bench, when I got sick and Otoosan came to find me, I don't remember much from that night, except that. "I love you Akito, that's why I gave birth to you, I gave birth to you, because I love you."
My head began to spin with images, images of Sana, of My mother, the park bench.all swarming in my head, and if you ask me it was getting crowded.
***
I can't remember much after that. That was a week ago.and now, I sit alone in a dark room. There is a bunk bed in the corner opposite the one I'm sitting in at this moment. I get food three times a day, but they don't allow me to have chopsticks, or any thing to eat my slop with, not that I eat it anyway. I am considered a high risk patient, or something of that nature. All I can really think about is Sana, and I don't care what they say.
I heard voices in my room, but I'm not sure of whom they were. They sounded familiar, but I couldn't seem to remember who these people are that come to visit me, so I just sat in my corner, and I think about Sana. I blocked out the world, the cold world, that took my Sana away from me. I spend all my time thinking about her, she is my only thought. Every fiber of me is dedicated to her, and I hope she knows it.
I wanted to run, I wanted to leave my cell and run forever, to run until I die. I want to run till I die and die from running. But the suits wont let me go, so I refuse to move from my spot in the corner. I will sit here till I die, no matter how long I have to wait, I will die and I will be with my Sana once more.
A/N* Well.PLEASE REVIEW! I don't think I used any new Japanese in this chapter so, yea. REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!
Translations for last chapter:
Otoosan- Father Kyoodai- Sibling (sister in this case) "Oishii sushi Otoosan! Arigatoo Gozaimasu!" Tasty sushi father! Thank you! -chan -meaning, small or it is also used as a loving term.
I think that takes care of everything! So, please READ AND REVIEW!
A/N* WOW! I feel loved! Only two days since I put the first chapter up and I already have 3 reviews! YAY! sorry.anyway, here's the next chapter for you!
***
Title: Never Ending Sadness
Author: Halfdemon-gurl15
Manga: Kodocha: Sana's Stage
Author: Miho Obana
Disclaimer: I do not own Kodocha, or any of the characters with in it.
Chapter 2: Tangled Thoughts of Nothing
"Akito.Akito! I'm alive.Akito.I Love you, Akito.don't forget me.I'm alive.Akito."
***
I heard a distant cry. I opened my eyes to see I was in a small room. The walls were covered with odd pink and yellow flowered wall paper, and there was only one small window that shed no light, for the curtains were drawn. I sat up, but someone pushed me back down. It was Otoosan, and I realized that I was still laying on the hospital bed. The heart monitor still beating steadily beside me.
I heard him say something, but I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts to make out what it was.
'Oh Sana, I love you dearly, I shall never love anyone again, as long as I live. But I will be with you soon, I can't live with out you. I Won't live without you, you're smile, you're hug, the hug that gave me the strength to carry on, even when it felt like I was just going to crumble, to fall into a billion pieces. I will be with you soon my love.'
In the back of my mind I heard Otoosan say at some point that I could go home today. I nodded pointlessly and turned over to let sleep claim me, hoping that my dreams would be of Sana's sweet and gentle face, her smile her warmth, I just had to experience it again. But I can never truly be with her again, not even in my dreams. The only way I can be with her once again, the only way is to die.
***
After waking up the next morning in my own bed, I tried desperately to remember what I had dreamed, but all I could remember was Sana, she was trying to tell me something, I just know it.
"Akito, get ready!" I heard Otoosan yell up to me. I got out of bed and walked over to my closet. My feet felt like they were made of lead as I walked. I got my only black suit out of the closet and laid it on my bed.
I took an ice cold shower before putting the charcoal black suit. The material felt stiff against my bare skin. I walked downstairs, Otoosan and Natsumi waiting, both wore depressed expressions on their countenances, both wearing black. My father a suit, Natsumi a dress. Otoosan looked at me expectantly as if to ask if I was ready to go. I nodded and he turned and went out the door. Me and Natsumi followed behind.
It was a dreary day, no sunlight was shining through the clouds, to say that the weather was mirroring my emotions would be an understatement, I felt worse. No amount of words or pain could express my grief on this day, the day of my one and only, Sana's funeral.
I don't remember the service, all I remember is that, there was no body, they never found her body in the wreckage, the flames from the explosion must have been so hot that it disintegrated her bones. I remember crying for the second time in the part of my life I still remember. It's all blank after that.
***
For what seemed like the millionth time I awoke to no light. I got up out of bed and walked slowly down the hallway to the bathroom. I felt like I was still asleep, like it was all a dream.
I remember turning on the bathtub faucet on, plugging up the hole, so that no water could escape. I went back to my room and got the dinosaur that Sana had given to me, it still wearing the very stylish scarf around it's neck. I knew that if Sana saw the dinosaur right now, she would start to laugh, I loved it when she laughed. It made all my troubles just float away, up into the clouds like they were never there.
I went back into the bathroom and put the small figurine on the sink. The bathtub was almost full now as I reached into the bottom cabinet, pulling out Otoosan's razor. I slit my lifeless wrist with my good hand and watched the crimson drip onto the floor with pure satisfaction. I welcomed the pain, I loved the pain, but not as much as I love Sana.
I felt warm water on my cold toes as the overflowing water came up and over the ceramic tub. Once again I took the razor in my left hand and sliced my right cheek, I felt the warm blood slowly stream down my face. I found scissors in the first aid kit and stabbed them right through my shoulder, I took the scissors out and blood gushed from the new wound. I felt light headed and I smiled to myself.
The pain, it was nothing compared to the pain of losing Sana. No amount of pain or torture could ever be worse than the whole in my chest, the black hole that used to be my heart.
I walked over to the tub and submerged my head in the hot steamy water. I felt my face tingle as forks poked and stabbed my face as the hot water scalded my cheeks. I came up from the water, my face the color of a beat. I opened my eyes to see the water had turned slightly red. I hung over the tub, trying to stay conscious as I let the blood from my shoulder turn the water crimson.
"More." I said to myself. I had planned this out, I would make sure that my death was slow and painful, to repent for everything I had done to everyone else. I knew it wasn't enough, it never would, or could be enough to pay back for everything I did wrong, how many lives I've ruined.
But as I went to slice another part of my body, I heard a voice inside my head, it sounded so familiar.
"Sana?" I heard her voice, but I couldn't make out what she was trying to say to me. She was to far away. "SANA! If you hear me, I'm Listening!" I yelled.
"I love you Akito, that's why I gave birth to you." the voice said to me. I could feel Sana's hands on my head, her fingers slowly going through my messy hair. I felt her presence as my mind slowly drifted back to that park bench, when I got sick and Otoosan came to find me, I don't remember much from that night, except that. "I love you Akito, that's why I gave birth to you, I gave birth to you, because I love you."
My head began to spin with images, images of Sana, of My mother, the park bench.all swarming in my head, and if you ask me it was getting crowded.
***
I can't remember much after that. That was a week ago.and now, I sit alone in a dark room. There is a bunk bed in the corner opposite the one I'm sitting in at this moment. I get food three times a day, but they don't allow me to have chopsticks, or any thing to eat my slop with, not that I eat it anyway. I am considered a high risk patient, or something of that nature. All I can really think about is Sana, and I don't care what they say.
I heard voices in my room, but I'm not sure of whom they were. They sounded familiar, but I couldn't seem to remember who these people are that come to visit me, so I just sat in my corner, and I think about Sana. I blocked out the world, the cold world, that took my Sana away from me. I spend all my time thinking about her, she is my only thought. Every fiber of me is dedicated to her, and I hope she knows it.
I wanted to run, I wanted to leave my cell and run forever, to run until I die. I want to run till I die and die from running. But the suits wont let me go, so I refuse to move from my spot in the corner. I will sit here till I die, no matter how long I have to wait, I will die and I will be with my Sana once more.
A/N* Well.PLEASE REVIEW! I don't think I used any new Japanese in this chapter so, yea. REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!