Sittin' at the computer whilst pondering next chapter, brain freeze/writers block runs high and far. Then, like a redeemer, THIS HOUR HAS 22 MINUTES plays in the background. Ahh, those who know the greatness of that and the Red Green Show probably couldn't resist a few chuckles. Also mixed with Royal Canadian Air Farces, THE Chicken Cannon Canada's only weapon of Mass destruction, aimed Exxon Ontario Primer loaded with sticky hair gel,  pine needles, toast, raspberry jam, hospital food, and gummy weasels AIM FIRE!!! So, I've Finally gotten to the next chapter, hailed on by CANADIAN HUMOR, GO CANADA!!! (note, not Canadian, but ya gotta luv 'em aye) I DO NOT OWN THE SONG "PARADISE" BY PRINE JOHN!!!  Just gonna alter it a bit.

The First Clash

           Bulma tapped her fingers on a lab table, bemused. Now the source of her grin was not unheard. Actually it was an uproar of stuff falling over and curses of anger from the nearby broom closet. No, No, not that, but an angry Saiyan determined to remove a set of cloths that refused to be removed. Everyone in the lab, which was Bardock Goku, Gohan, Goten, Trunks, Vegeta, Bra, Lynx, Jace, and the fag (ahem I mean Yamcha *cough coughdikecough*) Nobody had any idea whom contacted the latter of the group of the upcoming battle, in reality, Vegeta and his purple haired son, Trunks, were placing high bets on how long it took before he/it/WOMAN got killed.

          "AHH, STUPID THING!! *CRASH* WON'T COME OFF *KABOOM*"!!!

          "Raven," Bulma finally sighed while Bra and Lynx stifled giggles, tails twitching, "Raven it's not that advanced, it's a button."

          Silence, "I knew that…where did you say you put my gi?"

          "Saiyans," Bulma murmured, which was answered by an 'I heard that!' from the closet. "It was on the shelf, I think it'd be on the floor now."

          "Riiiiiiiiight…." Raven said as more stuff clambered around in her search. "FOUND THEM!!"

          Trunks laughed, "took you long enough."

          WHAM!! The door flew open. On the threshold stood a rather ruffled looking, female version of Goku, but definitely more ruffled looking. A bucket had somehow attached itself to her foot, and in her time on the broom closet a mop must have attacked her, there were only a few scorched remains left in the wake of destruction. She blew a lock of jet-black hair out her eyes, smoothing out a gi of the same, dark color. She tightened a silvery belt that secured her black gi pants up.

          "Waz everyone lookin' at?" She insisted, "s'not everyday that mops turn on you all teeth and claw."

          "Nothing," chuckled Bardock, "nothing nothing nothing. How did it go?"

          Raven raised and eyebrow and sank into a chair, closing her eyes, tail switching back and forth. "Complete idiocy, all left me alone once I'd told them where that nice explosive was. Hopefully they got a lovely surprise when rock, lake, and such came tumbling down upon those thick heads. They need some sense beat into them." She looked up and grinned, "sometimes I can't believe I'm a Saiyan seeing some of the dim things they do."

          Goten nudged his dad as Goku laughed and did the famous Son Scratch&Grin. 

          "So," Vegeta sneered, "what do we do now? Your plan was trash, once they get no signal from their party than the entire ship comes. What would your intelligent thinking get us into then? Hmm?"

          Raven cracked her knuckles, "then we'll open up a hearty can of kick ass stew, hold the vegetables!" There were murmurs of agreement as tails lashed in anticipation of a battle.

          "Haven't you ever thought their numbers might be too great to deal with?" Vegeta asked, scowling.

          Goku sighed, "Vegeta, why are you always so negative?"

          "He is right son," Bardock said strongly, "only Vegeta and I have ever been with an army of Saiyans and even though they're strong, when they want something, their smart, fast, vicious and determined."

          "But," Trunks said quietly, "we'll win right."

          Silence

          "Of course we will." Raven jumped enthusiastically, "we'll be 'em and keep our planet and people."

          "I can't believe all this is happening just because of me." Lynx whispered, "I thought I was just a normal, parentless human that just had a tail because I was strange, not because I was part of another race."

          "Saiyans want power," Raven said, "I admit, becoming strong is my wish too. But they want you to conquer other planets. They've done so by destroying the entire population, but with one that can control elements, water, fire and earth, they think you'd give them better possibilities. Akin to on a planet abundant with water that resists Saiyans, you could form drought, famine, and volcanoes, once they were weakened so much they couldn't oppose Saiyan rule, than they'd have to give up."

          Silence prevailed after this. All of the jumped when a loud buzzing noise erupted from one of the computers, Vegeta even went high enough to crash his head on the high ceiling. But, since Bulma was smart enough to know a bunch of Saiyans lived in her household, made it indestructible, so Vegeta's spiky hair was hurt more than the ceiling. To say the least it'd been smashed flat, and to see Vegeta with such a new hairstyle, at least temporarily, made a few people snigger. Within a few seconds with an audible "sproing" it leaped back into it's normally, flame-like self that could stab someone like a dull kitchen knife.

          Bra clasped her hands to her ears, though she wasn't suffering as much as the pureblooded Saiyans hearing, "mommy turn it off!"

          Bulma lunged at the machine that was producing a sound that could permanently damage one's hearing, did a dramatic leap, her hand landing on the big BLUE button as she tumbled inelegantly to the floor. The noise stopped and she got to her feet, panting like she'd run a four-minute mile.

                    "Woman what was that all about!" Vegeta yelled, nursing his head that now supported one of those huge, red anime bumps that looked remarkably like an overgrown zit.

          Bulma was pale like before, her hands trembled as she laid them gently on her white lab coat to smooth it down, "more are coming…"

          Raven held back the urge to bang her head repeatedly on the cold, metal counter until she either killed so many brain cells that she'd be an idiot, or knocked herself out. She forced herself to say in a strained voice, "how many?"

          Bulma's blue eyes looked to every Saiyan in the room, "four score."

          "UHHHHHGGG!!!!!" Trunks yelled! "THAT'S EIGHTY!!!"

          "Quality over quantity Trunks," Goku said cheerfully, trying to break the tense atmosphere, and failing horribly as Saiyans who knew the home planet glared.

          "Don't forget the twenty I left without a ride home." Raven pointed out. "but don't loose hope, we can win!"

          "Yea," Goku walked around, patting the backs of those he knew wouldn't reach over and strangle him, "she's right, we can win!" 

          "You know," Raven said "this is a special event that calls for a special weapon!"

          The others groaned as she dashed out of the lab, only to return exactly 19.284120984712908470928479120 seconds later with….

          "A naginata!!" She held up proudly. It's smooth five-foot lacquered teak staff; adorned with brass designs so intricate it was only a master's work, capped with eighteen inches of curved cruel, deadly sharp steel.

          She gave it a test swipe, moving with the weapon as it they were one, flowing gracefully like oil. There wasn't a sound as it passed through a  metal chair, but it fell apart in two pieces, neatly cut but the razor sharp blade. She chuckled, "I dub it my tail slasher." The others shuddered. She held up a little capsule, "this is loaded with sharp and shinnies too!" She transferred it to her tail and stashed it in her right boot.

          Vegeta indicated he wanted to see it with a gesture of his hand and she held it out. He took it grumpily as she tested the blade and as soon as his finger touched it, a few drops of blood spilled from his thumb. He raised an eyebrow, "where did this come from?"

          "Made it," Raven replied, "nice isn't it? it's my best yet!"

          Gohan, for a second forgetting the danger to some asked, "made it!? How?"

          Raven took back her naginata from Vegeta, who licked the blood off his thumb. "The furnace to capsule cooperation makes a nice forged, it provides steady, even heat and metal can be set into it to heat up to working temp. And if anyone has noticed I got an anvil and forging tools down there, I got some from a smith near Goku's, he made them for me."

          "Ahh," Gohan said.

          "You know," Raven noticed, back to her battle mode, "I can't see how or why a pansy school teacher would take part in this, I mean, you don't train much and gotten weak Gohan, even Goten is catching up quick to your power level."

          Gohan snorted, "s'cuse me, I wouldn't be talking, I'm am still strong than-"

          "boot to the head," WATHUMP!!!

          "OWW, YOUR BOOTED ME IN THE HEAD!!" Gohan screamed, "I WASN'T READY!!"

          Raven scowled, "proves my point, a true warrior is always ready for anything, especially a surprise attack."

          "WELL I WASN'T EXPECTING IT!!"

          'What, should I send you a letter next time? THAT'S WHY IT'S A SURPRISE ATTACK YOU BOOKWORM!!" Raven fumed, "AND IF-"

          "Enough!" Bardock roared, Gohan cowered, Raven winced. "Fighting like children when we should be getting ready to fight! Have you ever thought about what might happen if they storm here! We need to find a battle site, NOW!"

          "Cool it Barducky," Bra yelled, a tear was in her eye, "YOUR ALWAYS YELLING! STOP IT!!"

          "So," Bulma said, "where we your planning to fight?"

          "Ocean!" Shouted Goten, he got weird looks.

          "I'd say an arid region, like a desert or something." Added Trunks

          "No cover," Bardock said, "why not a forest?"

          "Mountain! We go to a mountain!"

          "What to get thrown into?" Bardock sneered, "A forest provides cover."

          "I say mountain!"

          "Forest!"

          "Mountain!"

          "Forest!"

          "MOUNTAIN!!"

          "FOREST!!"

          "FOREST MOUNTAIN!!" Lynx snapped with her tail lashing angrily "that makes everybody happy!"

          "Wow," said Raven in awe at her young friend and her rare temper, "Forest Mountain it is!"

          If Vegeta and Bardock were four year olds they would have either,    a) stuck their tongues out at each other, b) started to fight, pulling hair and tails, or c) thrown anything closeted to hand at the other. But since they were grown up men, the just scowled, with crossed arms and turned away from one another.

          Goku nodded to everyone else, "well, let us be off, I'll use instant transmission, we have a fight to win!"

          "VICTORY!!" Lynx yelled and put her hand on Goku's arm, "We fight to win!"

          Vegeta, sour at having to be even close to his rival, leaned his long, monkey tail over and so very lightly touched Trunks's elbow with it. The purple-haired demi didn't even notice it, but Vegeta silently scowled when he saw Raven smirking at him.

          *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

          In a flash they were standing in a vast, mountain forest, very much like the one Raven had met the Planet Vegeta Saiyans in disguise. A stream babbled along gently right next to them. Father along it crashed into rapids and waterfalls and boiling pools. The crisp air smelt clean and fresh, a slight hint of fall with the golden tinged foliage. Off a ways, a blue jay sounded and flew away in a silent flutter of swift wings.

"Goku," Raven held warningly!

          "It's awleright!" He said, showing his hands in nervousness at the female, even if it was his own niece. "They're all gone. And the open area makes a great battlefield. Relax!"

          "Their not here yet," Gohan said, looking around with his eyes and ki.

          "Great observation," Raven said sourly, "it only took the rest of us all of five seconds, are you sure you had a 4.0 GPA?"

          "Shove it brat! I get better grades than you!"

          Raven had mocking air to her voice, "at least I am a sophisticated Saiyan whom can create a pronunciation of vocabulary longer than two syllables, and didn't have to get pampered by a teary eyed harpy. Words my educated cousin, that's all they are, they cannot hurt me. Threats are only for one with little terminology. I find the normal four letter insults quite boring when formed into an insulting sentence, all I can do is laugh little tailless semi-Saiyan!"

          Gohan shut his mouth, he couldn't think of any comebacks. He missed his tail, which had never been able to come back, with this thought he mentally scowled at Piccolo who'd ripped off his fuzzy little tail!

          Bra yawned and sat down on a bed of moss, "I'm bored, when will the fighting start?"

          "Soon," was all Vegeta said. Though he had a rough exterior, he was leaping with childish glee inside! He sought a first-class fight, and to boot his little brother's butt, a pleasure the noble prince had not had for a long many years!

          And so they waited. For a while, they all stood. Gohan was mentally going over battle tactics that had not been used for many years. Jace was staring blankly at the water of the stream, mind in some faraway place. Goku was talking with Yamcha, who laughed nervously at something the Saiyan said. Both Trunks and Vegeta leaned against trees, arms crossed and eyes closed. Raven and Lynx silently stood side-by-side by Bra, tails strangely still. Goten was the first to break the quiet, with a loud, "I'm hungry!"

          Vegeta opened one eye at the insubordinate child, "go find some toadstools to eat, that'll do all of us a favor."

          Without a word Raven thrust her Naginata in the stream, lifting it above the water, a giant speared fish flopped hopelessly the end, life ebbing away. With a flick of her wrist, she flipped it into the air and caught it, and tossed it at her cousin. She wiped the blade on the grass and went back to her silent standing.

          Goten looked at the fish, "how am I supposed to eat it?"

          Trunks smacked his face, "you shove it in your mouth and swallow!"

          "Raw?!"

          "Look," Bardock said, "either shut up and eat it, or I'll force-feed it to you, you were the one complaining you were hungry!"

          "Geeze gramps," Goten grinned and pulled out a small knife and cleaned the fishy. He hesitated, looking at the pink, raw meat and then took a bite. Satisfied it wouldn't eat him first, he reduced it to nothing. "Yummy," Goten chirped happily.

          Vegeta grumbled something about only pussies saying the word "yummy"!

          I'm not a pussy!" Goten yelled loudly.

          Vegeta fumed, "Kakarot spawn, be quiet!"

          "Make me-"

          "SHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Raven hissed quietly, yet harshly, "shut up, now! Listen!"

          Everyone stood tense, wondering what the Saiyan girl was wanting them to listen for. Goten yelped when he heard an earsplitting crash nearby and quickly covered his mouth!. This boom was quickly followed by more. The noise seemed to go on forever, to last for eternity. Smoke rose into the sky from the area, fire roared in the trees! Then, all of the sudden, it was silent. Not the silence, where you only think it's silent, but it's not. This was the ever-lasting quiet, no birds chirped, not a leaf shuddered, and even the stream was hushed.

          The Saiyans had landed, and even closer than at first thought. The sharp scent of burning wood and plants filled the air to bursting. Lynx slashed the air violently with her hand and the fire, caused from the Saiyan space pods, instantly went out.

          Raven was the first to move! Head held high and her face set, she strode out into the woods, towards the crash site! She melted coolly into the dense forest growth, like a black panther on the hunt. Lynx and Bra, nodding to the rest, ran so they were caught up. Bardock glided after them, only to be followed by Trunks, and Goten, Goku and Gohan!. Vegeta threw a sour look at Jace and Yamcha before speeding off into the trees! Jace looked at Yamcha, who looked at him, Jace shrugged and sprinted off, leaving Yamcha alone.

          Bardock was flying in between the braches of a ancient oak tree when he heard song ahead of him. He paused to listen. It had almost had what earth people called western, ring to it.

When I was a young-in my parents would travel,

Down to planet Vegeta, where they had been born,

There's a crazy old king that is often remembered,

So many a time that my memories are worn, ……

          Bardock was shocked to know the singer. It was Raven. He finally caught up with her. She was on the edge of a large clearing. Smoking pits in the ground where the small army had landed on earth. A breeze blew past, whipping a piece of spiky hair in his face. His granddaughter, with Bra and Lynx beside her, was facing the army, it was already lined up in battle fashion!. Only one was singing, in a gentle, determined voice that rang out for all to hear. It was a beacon of hope for the tiny earth protectors!

And father, O mother, can't we go to Vegeta,

Down by the ole kingdom where heaven be lay,

I'm sorry my kid but your too late in askin',

Freeza the monster had destroyed it away,

Hesitantly, Bardock put a hand on Raven's shoulder. It had been five years since he last was the fierce planet pirate. His cautious, non-open attitude was still there. But all so softly, softer than a clean ocean breeze, he sang along. It was a song he'd heard only once before, but the words were as fresh as a green sapling on his mind.

Well before we'd travel right down to Vegeta,

Past the grand ole palace of the royal family,

Where the air smelled like battle and we'd shoot with our ki blasts,

But only the challengers, where all that we'd kill,

 

Behind her, Raven heard a soft, gruff voice behind her joining along. She barely heard it. But it was Bardock. But near Bardock, another was singing too. It was a voice of pride and strength, so hardened by battle, it was like coarse stone. She turned her head o so much as she gathered a lungful of air, and saw Vegeta, and he was smirking!

And father, O mother, can't we go to Vegeta,

Down by the ole kingdom where heaven be lay,

I'm sorry my kid but your too late in askin',

Freeza the monster had destroyed it away,

And Freeza the monster came with the strongest of armies,

He lied to the Saiyans and and promised false hopes and truths,

Well he used all the Saiyans until they'd become too strong,

And threw them away like a bag of old shit,

And father, O mother, can't we go to Vegeta,

Down by the ole kingdom where heaven be lay,

I'm sorry my kid but your too late in askin',

Freeza the monster had destroyed it away,

When I die let my soul become not bothered

Let my spirit find the old planet and race,

I'll almost to Vegeta ever so closer,

I'll halfway to Vegeta, with the kingdom waiting,

Closer to heaven, than I ever was,

And father, O mother, can't we go to Vegeta,

Down by the ole kingdom where heaven be lay,

I'm sorry my kid but your too late in askin',

Freeza the monster had destroyed it away,

 

"VICTORY!!" Lynx threw back her head and screamed.

          "VICTORY!! Bra yelled behind her!

          The earth Saiyans erupted into a chorus of "VICTORY VICTORY VICTORY VICTORY VICTORY!!! YEA!!!!!"

          The Planet Vegeta Saiyans had stood tense as this al went on. They began working themselves into a frenzy now! Hooting war screams and yelling, they rallied and prepared for battle!

          Lynx took Raven's Naginata and held it high as lightning sparked from it's length, she was surrounded in an aura of blazing fire, "FOR EARTH!!"

          "FOR EARTH!" They all cried!

          Screaming a raging war cry, "FOR EARTH!" Raven, Bra and Lynx, charged into combat, eyes gleaming with battle lust.