Leo kept his narrowed eyes on the tennis ball in his fist, gritting his teeth as he squeezed it. At first the action had brought only a dull ache to his arm, but the longer he kept it up the sharper it got. Still, he was determined not to let it stop him. He'd been through worse pain than this… he could handle it.

Suddenly a large hand closed over his, making him jump. He looked up to see Raph looking at him with a concerned frown.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"I've been sayin' your name four times now," his older brother said. "You've done enough of these… ya don't wanna strain it."

Leo felt a swell of frustration but covered it with a bored grin.

"Ah, c'mon, give a turtle a break. I'm fine, really!"

Raph only raised a brow, his expression unconvinced.

"Raise your arm," he said.

His grin slipping, Leo hesitated for a few moments, then fixed his expression and let out a petulant sounding sigh.

"Okay, fine." He took a quick, steadying breath, then began to lift his arm. "See, all good…"

But he spoke too soon. He'd barely raised it to his chest when an even sharper ache lanced through it, and his words were cut off by a grunt of pain. As he cradled the throbbing limb, he couldn't suppress a heavy sigh of frustration. He felt Raph's hand rest on his shoulder, concern still evident in his voice.

"You okay?"

Leo nodded without looking up, and he heard his older brother's quiet sigh.

"Hey, c'mon… with the beating ya took, it's amazing you're even this far. Remember, Donnie said it'll take time for things t' get back to normal."

The words were supposed to be encouraging, but Leo felt himself droop. He couldn't keep the dejection out of his voice when he replied.

"What if they don't get back to normal?"

The large hand on his shoulder gave it a few gentle pats.

"C'mon, little brother, don't start with that. Your arm's gonna be fine, trust me."

"I do," Leo said softly. "But I'm not talking about my arm."

Silence filled the room, and though Leo still didn't look up he could imagine Raph's expression. Finally, the older turtle spoke.

"Leo, what d' you…"

Leo couldn't hold back a soft chuckle, but it held no trace of amusement.

"Don't pretend you don't know what I mean, bro. Everything's screwed up now… we're screwed up. Nobody knows what to say, what to do to make each other better. We all look at each other different… we treat each other different." He let out another humorless laugh. "But I guess it was inevitable, wasn't it? Everything breaks eventually, right? Guess we were due."

A few moments of silence passed, then Raph spoke again.

"Well, you're right about that."

Leo blinked and looked up, surprised. But Raph only smiled before going on.

"Everything does break at some point, including us. But there's somethin' you're forgetting about."

Confused, Leo furrowed his brow.

"What?"

Still smiling that soft, gentle smile he'd used to soothe his brothers since childhood, Raph patted his head.

"That just 'cause something's broken, that doesn't mean it can't be fixed."

Those words struck a chord with Leo; when he thought of life after all this, he'd imagined nothing being the same again. That much he was sure was true, but up to this point, he had thought of it as a bad thing. He believed he would have to leave his old self behind completely to become the Leo Casey had idolized, who could be a real leader. It would be a small enough price to pay for his family's safety. But he knew now that that version of him was damaged in so many ways, was shaped by loss and suffering that he likely wouldn't experience now.

"It's just…" His voice trailed off, and his gaze lowered to his hands.

"Yeah?" Raph urged. Leo shifted, then let out another heavy sigh.

"Maybe… maybe things shouldn't go back to normal. At least not for me."

After a few moments of silence, Raph spoke again with confusion in his tone.

"What… why'd you say that?"

Leo shook his head and looked up at his older brother, who looked back at him with a combination of puzzlement and concern. The slider couldn't imagine why Raph would be questioning that statement, when he'd seen with his own eyes what a failure Leo was.

"Because… who I was… it was wrong. I wasn't right for the team. I wasn't right for anything."

Raph's expression changed into one of deep sympathy and he gave Leo's shoulder a gentle squeeze.

"Leo. I know you've gotten it in your head that something's wrong with you, and not just after what happened with the Krang. It's like you said to me. You didn't not step up because you weren't capable… you didn't step up 'cause you were scared. You think you're not fit for this, but ya never really gave yourself a chance."

That made Leo hesitate for a moment, but then he scoffed and looked away.

"Yeah… and look what happened when I did. I almost got you killed, and then…"

"Well, that's the thing," Raph said, cutting him off. "You weren't really giving yourself a chance… you were tryin' to be someone else."

Leo looked back at his older brother, puzzled.

"But I've gotta be someone else, don't I? All I did was screw up."

"Yeah, 'cause you weren't trying as you. Don't ya get it, Leo? Ya don't hafta be a different person… just the best version of yourself. And once you were, look what ya did."

Despite wanting to find some way to argue, Leo found himself unable to find one. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he could see the truth in his brother's words.

"And for the record," Raph went on. "Even if future you was crazy awesome, I don't want ya to be like him… and neither does anyone else."

That statement left Leo completely confused, and he couldn't deny a little hurt.

"Why?" he asked softly. Raph gave him a sad smile.

"'Cause that version of you got how he was from suffering. From losin' everyone he loved and carrying something nobody should have t' carry. None of us wanna see you go through that kind a' pain."

Leo directed his gaze down to his hands, a strange combination of relief, gratitude, and sadness swirling in him.

"Guess I really will never be the Leo Casey knew," he murmured.

"No," Raph said. "But now ya can better than that."

That made the slider look up again to see his brother giving him a proud grin.

"You can be awesome as you."

A lump rose in Leo's throat, his eyes brimming. Letting out a watery chuckle, he swiped his arm across them.

"So you're saying I'm not already awesome? Bro, I'm hurt."

Raph snorted in amusement before scrubbing a fist over Leo's head.

"There's th' Leo we know an' put up with."

Leo laughed as he pushed Raph's hand away. It felt like so long since he'd really laughed, and he wondered if he even could anymore. It seemed to lift a weight off his shoulders, one that he realized he'd been carrying long before the Krang invasion.

"Thanks, Raph."

His brother grinned as he gave Leo's head a few more pats.

"Anytime, little brother. I know ya wanna be here for us, but we're here for you too… don't forget that."

Leo nodded.

"I won't…. I promise."